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Harlem Wrestling Alliance...Bad just got a lot worse!


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[CENTER][B]***DISCLAIMER*** The views expressed in this diary are in no way the views of the writer. Beware below you will find racism, sterotyping, and absolutly horrible wrestling, what fun this should be! Read at your own risk Credit should be given to Mr. T Jobs to Me, PeterHilton, and SadisticBlessings for a great 1975 CVerse mod...and now on with the show[/B][/CENTER]
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[CENTER][B]February 25, 1975[/B] The economy was going down the drain and I had just graduated high school a few months back. It was no secret I needed a job, hell have the nation did. College was nothing more to me than a wet dream at the moment and as I scanned the classified section of the New York Times I expected to maybe find a job working in a run down factory if I were half lucky. Imagine my surprise then when I saw in the middle of the classified section an ad to be the head booker of New York’s fastest growing wrestling company, Harlem Wrestling Alliance. The details were pretty vague all it said was that it was a locally ran company ran by a man named Warren Young. They called themselves “wrestling of the future” and the starting pay was 200 dollars a month, on top of that they said no experience was required and they would train you on the job. It sounded like a job made in heaven, so of course I made the phone call before someone else could beat me to the punch. Mr. Young sounded like a nice enough man and he seemed very eager to give me the job over the phone. I was informed this promotion was based out of Harlem, I’d never been there before but it sounded like a nice enough place. So I packed up all my belongings in my 1965 Ford Transit and hit the road.[/CENTER]
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[CENTER][B]March 1, 1975[/B] What the hell have I done? Never in my life have a scene a city so much in despair. Racial discrimination was outlawed in the United States in 1968 and as far as I knew it was a thing of that past, that all changed when I made it into Harlem. Every business I drove past was boarded up and shut down. Spray painted on those boards were a series of racial slurs some which sent a shiver down my spine. Harlem’s population had dropped to new laws and as I found out only the least skilled Americans actually lived in Harlem, yes that goes for wrestlers as well. There was hope however, it was rumored that an International Trade Center was to be built here to boost the economy, who knows maybe this could turn into a gold mine after all. I made it to the “office” around noon and met Mr. Young in his office. Warren Young was a black man who as I learned later played football at Boston College. He assured me with a not so straight face that all the talent on the roster was just as talented as he was. He went on to tell me that this was a “local” promotion so the roster only consisted of about 15 people all of who were loved by our die hard fan base. He showed my to my office, which strangely was in the opposite corner of the room as him, and told me due to the abrupt resignation of the last head booker he wanted me to sign a 2 year contract stating that if I left before then all my wages earned would have to be paid back. This seemed a little odd to me, but it still sounded like it could be a decent job so I signed and in doing so sold my soul to the devil.[/CENTER]
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[CENTER][B]March 1, 1975[/B] The sun was starting to set as I unloaded the last of my things into my new office. What things you ask, well a fold up chair and table and a small fern plant, it was actually all that would fit on my side of the office, but what did I care I was the head booker for an up and coming wrestling promotion and had guaranteed work for at least two years. On my way back to the office with my fern I saw that Warren had left a note and a small book on my desk. The book was the current roster for the company complete with pictures and bios. This is where things started going bad for me. The note read as followed: Clayton, I’m really excited you’ve decided to take on the booking job here at HWA. I would have stayed and told you all this in person but people like me tend to be found in a dark ally somewhere if we are out after dark, and we have to save our security money for nights when we have shows. The product you will be booking is that of a hardcore style, judging by the way people act in this city we really believe that this style will soon take off in America. I would like our first show to be held on the last Friday of the month and it will be called “Harlem Hangover.” It’s worth noting that when you speak to the boys in back that you tell them not to show up to the event drunk based off the name, don’t ask questions just do it trust me. Gun shots are starting to ring in the background, so I must be going. Read over the roster the we can address your question in the morning. Warren Hardcore wrestling, was he kidding? And what did he mean his kind, I was confused as to why college athletes weren’t allowed out at night, probably has to do with being a partier. He was just kidding about the gun shots…right?.[/CENTER]
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no by his kind he meant local wrestling promotion owners. the rabid fan base tends to get a little rowdy when they've gone to long with out their fix. good start, I may have to go check out the 75 mod to get a better feel for this. I hope you have as much fun writing it as it looks like it's going to be reading it!
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[CENTER][B][SIZE="5"]ROSTER[/SIZE][/B] [B]Main Event:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Red"]Krooked Kop Kyle[/COLOR] Kyle plays a racist cop in HWA, oh the joys of booking him. [COLOR="Blue"]Magnum Johnson[/COLOR] Johnson is the top babyface in the company. He plays the repressed blackman who is all about sticking it to "the man." [COLOR="Red"]Mr. G[/COLOR] Mr G is everything you can hope for when booking for a promotion based on sterotypes.He's big, black, smokes cigars and is never seen without a chicken wing.. [COLOR="Blue"]Warren Young[/COLOR] Warren is the owner of the company and a former QB for Boston College. Why he gave up football for this, God only knows. [CENTER][B]Upper Midcard:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Blue"]Action Jackson[/COLOR] Jackson is the tag partner of Magnum Johnson usually used as a punching bag. [COLOR="Red"]Dancin’ Rick[/COLOR] A true to life jobber who would much rather have a dance off than a wrestling match. [COLOR="Red"]Disco Stu[/COLOR] See above [COLOR="Red"]Redneck Bill[/COLOR] Bill plays the role of a hick who for lack of better words hates black people. He teams with Krooked Kop Kyle as The Haters. [COLOR="Blue"]Silky Seymoure[/COLOR] What would a wrestling company be without a pimp. And to make things even more bizarre the fans love him. [COLOR="Blue"]Tron the Pusher[/COLOR] The right hand man to Seymoure. Tron is the drug dealer of the group and again a fan favorite. [CENTER][B]Midcard:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Red"]Bulletproof[/COLOR] Bulletproof has been shot 3 times, probably all by people who had to suffer watching one of his matches [COLOR="Blue"]Lefty Jenson[/COLOR] Lefty is a young kid who just wanted to get into the business, he has no idea what he's gotten himself into. [COLOR="Blue"]Omar Grandsbury[/COLOR] "The O.G." is a talentless hack who will probably be main eventing soon. [CENTER][B]Lower Midcard:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Red"]The Rainbow Warrior[/COLOR] The name says it all, yes he plays a gay man. To top it off he sings YMCA and dresses as a sailor...may god have mercy on my soul. [CENTER][B]Announcer:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Blue"]Bob Johnson[/COLOR] Bob is a great announcer, why he's in a place like this is beyond me. Of course why we pay him 1,100 us also beyond me. And you can bet I'm going to talk to Warren about that. [CENTER][B]Referee:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Red"]Gus Stripeshirt[/COLOR] Gus had no choice but to be a ref with a name like that. Let's just hope that at 400lbs he doesn't break my ring. [CENTER][B]Road Agent:[/B][/CENTER] [COLOR="Red"]Old Man Rivers[/COLOR] At 86 years old I think it's safe to say he won't be on the roster to much longer [CENTER][B]Tag Teams:[/B] [COLOR="Red"]Boogie Nights (Disco Stu and Dancin’ Rick)[/COLOR] [COLOR="Blue"]Hood Rich (Silky Seymoure and Tron The Pusher)[/COLOR] [COLOR="Red"]Rabid Pitbulls (Bulletproof and Mr. G)[/COLOR] [COLOR="Blue"]Street Soul (Magnum Johnson and Action Jackson)[/COLOR] [COLOR="Red"]The Haters (Krooked Kop Kyle and Redneck Bill)[/COLOR] [B]Titles:[/B] [B]HWA King of New York:[/B] [COLOR="Blue"]Magnum Johnson[/COLOR][/CENTER]
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[QUOTE=mistaken;416109]no by his kind he meant local wrestling promotion owners. the rabid fan base tends to get a little rowdy when they've gone to long with out their fix. good start, I may have to go check out the 75 mod to get a better feel for this. I hope you have as much fun writing it as it looks like it's going to be reading it![/QUOTE] You really should check it out man, it's a lot of fun. My only gripe is there are more than a few people without a pic, but that's just me it helps make it come to life more for me.
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[CENTER][B]Monday Week 3 March 1975[/B] Things have been fast paced since taking the head booking job here in hel...i mean HWA. The first thing I did was ask to see the finances for the last few months, I really wish I wouldn't have done that. We would be extremly lucky to be able to last a year with the way this business was losing money, so my first order of business was to "cut the fat." The highest paid person on the roster, excluding Warren cause I can't fire him, was our announcer Bob Johnson. Bob was making over a grand a show while even our most over talent was only bringing in 100. He was the first to go, and in an act of good faith I informed Warren I would take over the announcing job. Am I good, not even close, but it should save money. The next highest paid person was my boy, Gus Stripeshirt. It pained me deeply to take him from what his calling was, but 800 a show for a ref was far to much. Instead I brought in a guy named Steve Levinson. Levinson had been around the business for awhile now and the word on the street was that he blows matches due to his "fast counts." But for only 200 a month it was well worth the risk. Looking over my roster I noticed there wasn't any females on it. Now you may be asking why I need a female, but the answer should be simple. How can a pimp effectively do his job without a woman to pimp? Lucky for him my request was answered when Zhi-Gong Ling agreed to call HWA her new home. In other perhaps good news, Magnum Johnson signed a PPA contract with APWF. As long as it doesn't take away from his performance here I'm hoping we can use him to branch out to other wrestlers. KKK also signed a PPA contract with AICW, let's hope they don't keep his gimmick.[/CENTER]
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[CENTER][B]HWA Presents… [SIZE="5"]Harlem Hangover[/SIZE] Live from The Western Gymnasium in New Jersey Attendance: 17[/B] The show kicks off with Krooked Kop Kyle standing in the middle of the ring. KKK: [COLOR="Red"]“Tonight, in front of the entire world I will finally get what should have been given to me long ago. Tonight I take on that no good ****** Magnum Johnson.”[/COLOR] (The 17 in attendance begin to boo loudly.) KKK: [COLOR="Red"]“We all know that no damn Coon deserves to win a title that was meant for a white man. Hell what’s next are we going to allow them to F*** our women too!”[/COLOR] (Apparently Johnson had heard enough and comes down the ramp.) Johnson: “[COLOR="Blue"]Yo, you got something you want to say cracker, then why don’t you be a real man and say it to my face! I earned this title the same way my people won their freedom, by kicking the Sh** out of low life pieces of white trash like you!”[/COLOR] (KKK looks outrages and charges after Johnson who meets him half way. They brawl for a minute before security breaks it up.) [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E+[/COLOR][/B] [B]Lefty Jenson Vs. Mr. G[/B] Mr. G came to the ring with a bucket of wings. Why is this significant you ask, well because he actually decided to fight without letting the bucket from his grasp. What’s worse…he won. Mr. G defeated Lefty Jenson in 4:47 by pinfall with a Brawler's Delight. [COLOR="Red"][B]Rating: E-[/B][/COLOR] Notes: Well the crowd hates Lefty and they made that clear. Sadly I don’t think the kid realized they were saying you suck and he actually took a bow after the match. Backstage now we see Silky Seymoure with his newest hoe Zhi-Gong Ling. Silky approaches The Rainbow Warrior who seems to be meditating. Silky: [COLOR="Blue"]“Look here playa. My girl Zhi-Gong here is new to the country and she needs some company if you know what I’m saying.”[/COLOR] Rainbow: [COLOR="Red"]“Eww that’s gross, girls have cuddies.”[/COLOR] Silky: [COLOR="Blue"]“What? No check it playa she wants to be with a real man, are you a real man?”[/COLOR] Rainbow: [COLOR="Red"]“You’re weird, but kind of cute though. I’m looking for someone to be my Indian, I bet you would look really good in fur.”[/COLOR] (With that Rainbow ran his hand over Silky’s chest. Silky lost it after that and bashed the poor kid over the head with his pimp cane.) [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] [B]King of New York Title Match: Magnum Johnson Vs. Krooked Kop Kyle[/B] Magnum Johnson defeated Krooked Kop Kyle in 7:31 by pinfall with a Street Justice. Magnum Johnson makes defense number 1 of his HWA King of New York title. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: D-[/COLOR][/B] Notes: Apparently this match brought the crowds mood down, I’m not sure why though I’m pretty stoked with a D- [B][COLOR="Red"]Final Rating: E+[/COLOR][/B] Notes: I think this show went over pretty well. I got some basic storyline settings up and running and found out the crowd already hates 1 of my guys. At this rate Hardcore Wrestling should take over the world in no time at all…right? Vital Statistics: We started with the following: [B]Prestige: 3.0 Money: 42500 Pop: 3.0[/B] And after 1 month this is where we stand: [B]Prestige: 3.1 Money: 40152 Pop: 3.6[/B][/CENTER] O.O.C. Let me know how you liked the first show. This is going to be one of those action packed diaries with not a lot of emphasis on the matches. I'm going to try and get a few matches posted a day.
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[CENTER][B]April 1975[/B] Well last month wasn’t a huge failure, but let’s face it we cut two of the biggest contracts on the roster and we still lost over 2,000 dollars. Of course I had an answer to this, increase ticket prices! Sure we may alienate the fans but hey that’s business right. Warren informed me that the next show will be called Drive By and pointed to the tiny holes in the wall around the office, I just thought we had really strange rodents. The main event for that show is going to Silky Seymoure taking on The Rainbow Warrior. Speaking of everyone’s favorite Pimp he was up for a contract extension this month. Lucky for us he doesn’t realize that he was by far one of the most talented men on the roster, because he only wanted a 50 dollar increase. Dancin’ Rick was also up for a contract extension. And while every fiber of my being was screaming to can the guy, the fact was no one wanted to come in and take his place so we had no choice but to resign him. In other news it seems getting released by HWA was the best thing to ever happen to Bob Johnson who now works for CCW and the pro wrestling powerhouse SWF. Also 3 time SWF King of Wrestling Ares Aegaleus is planning on retiring from the ring later this month. Chicago Championship Wrestling, a developmental company for APWF, has risen to small. What does this have to do with us you ask, well they are going to be looking for more talent and we are smaller than them. Little do they know we don’t have any talent so really the joke is on them.[/CENTER]
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[CENTER][B]HWA Presents… Drive By Live from The Western Gymnasium in New Jersey Attendance: 18[/B] The show opens up backstage where Action Jackson is sitting in the locker room when KKK and Redneck Bill walk in. Bill: [COLOR="Red"]“Hey boy, where’s the other little monkey Magnum at?”[/COLOR] (Jackson slowly raises to his feet obviously offended.) KKK: “The man asked you a question boy, you’d be wise to answer it.” Jackson: [COLOR="Blue"]“I’m not your boy Cracker, and if you don’t watch yourself you may just find yourself counting the lights again.”[/COLOR] KKK: [COLOR="Red"]“You hear that Bill, this here Coon just threatened a police officer.”[/COLOR] (With the KKK takes out his night stick and him and Redneck Bill beat the hell out of Action Jackson.) [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E+[/COLOR][/B] [B]Silky Seymoure Vs. The Rainbow Warrior.[/B] Silky Seymoure defeated The Rainbow Warrior in 7:58 by pinfall with a Big Pimpin'. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E-[/COLOR][/B] Notes: What’s so heart breaking about this match is that these two have GREAT chemistry. Of course the crowd absolutely despises The Rainbow Warrior and he was tired after the match. Can you say double whammy. Disco Stu and Warren Young are up next but before the match Stu grabs a mic. Stu: [COLOR="Red"]“You know Warren I was thinking, with you being the owner of this company and all I really don’t want to kick your ass.”[/COLOR] (Small heat from all 18 people in attendance.) Stu: [COLOR="Red"]“So I was thinking instead we can have a dance off!”[/COLOR] (Stu starts to dance and gets about 5 seconds into his routine when Warren Young sends him to the mat with a hard right.) [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] [B]Warren Young Vs. Disco Stu[/B] Disco Stu defeated Warren Young in 10:48 by pinfall following interference from Dancin' Rick. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E-[/COLOR][/B] Notes: Just when you thought things couldn’t get worse. Here’s a fun fact, the crowd hates Warren Young. He’s the F****** owner, how can you hate him. On top of that these two didn’t click. [B][COLOR="Red"]Final Rating: E-[/COLOR][/B] Notes: With the crowd crapping on every wrestler I put out there, I think suicide may be the best option for me. But on the plus side we had one more person in attendance. Stayed tuned next week folks as a try to pull a rabbit from my hat. [B]Vital Statistics: Prestige: 3.2 ([COLOR="Green"]+.1[/COLOR]) Money: 38371 ([COLOR="Red"]-1,781[/COLOR]) Pop: 4.0 ([COLOR="Green"]+.4[/COLOR])[/B] [/CENTER]
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Hey man, great job so far. I'm here to wish you luck with this because i played with HWA for 4 game years and each month was like a little heartbreak. Seriously, HWA is fun but really hard to play with, good luck.
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[CENTER][B]HWA Presents… [SIZE="5"][COLOR="Red"]Massacre[/COLOR][/SIZE] Live from The Western Gymnasium in New Jersey Attendance: 18[/B] [B]Mr. G Vs. Omar Grandsbury[/B] This match had everything you could ask for, bucket of wings…check, Both wrestlers gasping for air at the end…check, Both wrestlers being off their game tonight…check. Am I missing anything, oh yeah it brought the crowds mood down Mr. G defeated Omar Grandsbury in 10:10 by pinfall with a Brawler's Delight. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] After the match Mr. G grabbed a wing…I mean a mic G: [COLOR="Red"]“You know what I love more than wings. Bi*****! That’s right I need me a fine hoe who can make me some good wings. So what I want is for Zhi-Gong Ling to put an apron on and get her ass out her to make me some wings![/COLOR] (After a few seconds Silky Seymoure came to the ramp with Zhi-Gong at his side.) Silky: [COLOR="Blue"]“Now hold up playa. Everyone knows you can’t make a hoe a housewife![/COLOR] (The fans cheer at the cheap line.) Silky: [COLOR="Blue"]“Now let’s get things straight, no one talks to one of my hoes that way unless it’s me, or they pay me to do so. So you have a couple options here pimp. You can either apologize to Zhi-Gong right now, or you can hand over 50 bucks and you can call her whatever you want.[/COLOR] (Mr. G says something but its not understandable with the wings in his mouth.) Silky:[COLOR="Blue"] “That’s your last warning playa…next time, it’s your ass!”[/COLOR] (Silky and Zhi-Gong head back up the ramp and backstage leaving Mr. G in the ring with an empty bucket of wings.) [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: D-[/COLOR][/B] [B]King of New York Title Match: Redneck Bill Vs. Magnum Johnson[/B] This match was booked after Johnson stated that he wanted revenge for what happened to Action Jackson. This wasn’t the worst of matches either These guys had pretty good chemistry which is nice. The only issue came when Redneck Bill almost choked on a cigarette because he refused to put it out during the match. Magnum Johnson defeated Redneck Bill in 9:31 by pinfall with a Street Justice. Magnum Johnson makes defense number 2 of his HWA King of New York title. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] After the match KKK hit the ring running and together they put the boots to Magnum as the show went off the air. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E+[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR="Red"] Final Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] Notes: For a company of this caliber I’m pretty happy about an E, I’m just waiting for someone to outlaw it. God let that be soon. Vital Statistics: Prestige: 3.3 ([COLOR="Green"]+.1[/COLOR]) Money: 36712 ([COLOR="Red"]-1,659[/COLOR]) Pop: 4.6 ([COLOR="Green"]+.6[/COLOR])[/CENTER]
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I quick word of advice having played enough backyard diaries or backstreet in this case, you can't really afford to have performers on the card if they're not going to be in a match. With the exception of the "Ho o' da HWA." By all means keep the angles and skits, it's what HWA is based on. But if someone is in a skit, they damn well better be in a match. Or ya gonna be one dead honkey. Ya dig? *** And don't go broke because any HWA is a good day. And use Bulletproof! Do you really want a guy who keeps surviving shootings pissed at you?
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[QUOTE=Beeker;419023]I quick word of advice having played enough backyard diaries or backstreet in this case, you can't really afford to have performers on the card if they're not going to be in a match. With the exception of the "Ho o' da HWA." By all means keep the angles and skits, it's what HWA is based on. But if someone is in a skit, they damn well better be in a match. Or ya gonna be one dead honkey. Ya dig? *** And don't go broke because any HWA is a good day. And use Bulletproof! Do you really want a guy who keeps surviving shootings pissed at you?[/QUOTE] And your advice is well recieved my friend. What I have been doing is if they are in a skit but not in a match I use them in a dark match, I just don't post the dark matches in the diary...because well they are dark. Actually HWA is a wrestling based promotion, or at least it's set to a ratio of 80% (which if any of the creators are reading I propose changing that if you update the mod for 08.) And as far as bulletproof goes, I really do want to use him, but with only 2 matches a show right now he keeps getting overlooked, but I agree I don't want that fool pissed at me =) Thanks for reading
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[CENTER][B]News from around the World[/B] CCW great Dale Christian has surprised Chicago fans by suddenly leaving the company late last night. It is rumored that Christian was due a contract extension but the two sides were nowhere close in terms of salary. Christian was doing double duty at CCW working not only as a wrestler but also as the head booker. At this time it is unclear who will be brought in to fill such a huge void. And in HWA news it seems two of the best worker in HWA (no sarcastic comments please) almost came to blows last night when Magnum Jackson mistakenly confused Zhi-Gong's gimmick of a Hoe to that of one in real life and when he propositioned Zhi-Gong her real life boyfriend Silky Seymoure became irrate and the two nearly came to blows before being separated by officials. It's unclear at this time what type of punishment, if any, will come down on the two athletes.[/CENTER]
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[QUOTE=mad5226;419817][CENTER][B]News from around the World[/B] CCW great Dale Christian has surprised Chicago fans by suddenly leaving the company late last night. It is rumored that Christian was due a contract extension but the two sides were nowhere close in terms of salary. Christian was doing double duty at CCW working not only as a wrestler but also as the head booker. At this time it is unclear who will be brought in to fill such a huge void. And in HWA news it seems two of the best worker in HWA (no sarcastic comments please) almost came to blows last night when Magnum Jackson mistakenly confused Zhi-Gong's gimmick of a Hoe to that of one in real life and when he propositioned Zhi-Gong her real life boyfriend Silky Seymoure became irrate and the two nearly came to blows before being separated by officials. It's unclear at this time what type of punishment, if any, will come down on the two athletes.[/CENTER][/QUOTE] Wow, Zhi-Gong and Silky started dating? That's almost begging for a made-for-TV movie in itself!
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[CENTER][B]HWA Presents… [SIZE="5"][COLOR="Red"]Harlem Hijacking[/COLOR][/SIZE] Live from The Western Gymnasium in New Jersey Attendance: 18[/B] [B]Bulletproof Vs. Tron the Pusher[/B] Perhaps one of the worst matches in the world. Bulletproof couldn’t have possible looked any worse. He has an amazing knack of no selling everything and is just…well it was bad ok. Bulletproof defeated Tron the Pusher in 7:44 by pinfall with a Bulletproof Stage Dive. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: F[/COLOR][/B] After the match Bulletproof grabbed a mic and told the world that he was going to find who was behind his shootings. God help us. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] [B]Street Soul Vs. The Haters[/B] Classic tag match here, well minus good wrestling anyway. It ended with KKK cuffing Action Jackson to the ring poll then double teaming Magnum. The Haters defeated Street Soul in 9:48 when Krooked Kop Kyle defeated Magnum Johnson by pinfall with a Racial Profiling. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] After the match The Haters continued the assault on Johnson then KKK grabbed the title and said something about it being back where it belonged and walked away with it. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR="Red"]Final Rating: E-[/COLOR][/B] Notes: Well the rating continues to go down. And I may be out of a job soon, ha I could only wish [B]Vital Statistics:[/B] Prestige: 3.4 ([COLOR="Green"]+.1[/COLOR]) Money: 34937 ([COLOR="Red"]-1,775[/COLOR]) Pop: 5.0 ([COLOR="Green"]+.4[/COLOR])[/CENTER]
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[QUOTE=mad5226;421802][B]Bulletproof Vs. Tron the Pusher[/B] Perhaps one of the worst matches in the world. Bulletproof couldn’t have possible looked any worse. He has an amazing knack of no selling everything and is just…well it was bad ok. Bulletproof defeated Tron the Pusher in 7:44 by pinfall with a Bulletproof Stage Dive. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: F[/COLOR][/B] After the match Bulletproof grabbed a mic and told the world that he was going to find who was behind his shootings. God help us. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B][/quote] Heh. Awesome! Bulletproof PI just screams money! Or Bulletproof will be screaming for money. Give him not the Stage Dive but the Flak Jacket (Frog) Splash - I loved it when D'Lo did it. And an E from Bulletproof. More angles. Stat! [quote][B]Street Soul Vs. The Haters[/B] Classic tag match here, well minus good wrestling anyway. [/quote] That's just a fantastic line right there than encapsulates all that is great about HWA. [quote][B][COLOR="Red"]Final Rating: E-[/COLOR][/B] Notes: Well the rating continues to go down. And I may be out of a job soon, ha I could only wish [/quote] With what you've got to work with? An E- is the equivalent of pulling an A with NOTBPW. You're a miracle worker! Keep up the fantastic fantasticness!
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[CENTER]I had a meeting today with Jimmy Fisher, or as you all know him as The Rainbow Warrior. He told me he had a great idea to turn the company around, and well let’s face it I needed a good idea. Of course the office was being fumigated (which sadly happens biweekly around here), so we had to meet at a local coffee shop. Why is this important you ask, well when the person you’re meeting in downtown Harlem walks in in a tie dye shirt tied off so his “midriff” is showing you get a little concerned. The conversation, well that didn’t go much better. Rainbow: [COLOR="Red"]“Thank you so much for meeting with me, I just know what I’m thinking is going to be absolutely perfect.”[/COLOR] Me: [COLOR="Blue"]“Alright, and what exactly is this grand idea?”[/COLOR] Rainbow: [COLOR="Red"]“Well I’ve noticed that everyone pretty much hates us, so I was thinking…How about if we turn HWA into a musical?”[/COLOR] Me: [COLOR="Blue"]“Um I’m sorry what?”[/COLOR] Rainbow: [COLOR="Red"]“A musical silly. I mean they are like the biggest thing on Broadway right now, and I have this perfect sailor outfit that would…”[/COLOR] Me: [COLOR="Blue"]“We are a wrestling company Jimmy not some Broadway production.”[/COLOR] Things turned bad to worse at this point. Jimmy actually jumped onto the table and began to sing YMCA. This naturally got us some very unwanted attention and I knew that if we didn’t get out of there soon I would end up like Bulletproof. A feat I cared not to get. [/CENTER]
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[CENTER][B]HWA Presents… [SIZE="5"][COLOR="Red"]Broken Will[/COLOR][/SIZE] Live from The Western Gymnasium in New Jersey Attendance: 29[/B] [B]Mr. G Vs. Silky Seymoure[/B] Mr. G was still a bit upset with the way Seymoure spoke to him a couple months back. Mr. G was distracted throughout the match by Zhi-Gong, not because she’s hot but because he thought he saw her eyeing his wings. The good news is these guys have good chemistry, the bad news is it didn’t make much of a difference. Silky Seymoure defeated Mr. G in 7:32 by pinfall with a Pimp Slap. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] After the match Silky grabbed a mic and told Mr. G that if he ever saw him looking at his hoes again then he’s going to make Mr. G his hoe. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: D-[/COLOR][/B] Bulletproof made his way to the ring and called out Warren Young. He said he knew Young had info on who shot him and he was going to beat the info out of him. Young appeared and agreed to tell Bulletproof all he knew in the rare chance that he actually lost to him. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] [B] Warren Young Vs. Bulletproof[/B] Warren Young got a lot of static from a vocal crowd who clearly weren't impressed. Any idea what this means? Bulletproof was a man on a mission. Sure his mission was to get information from Young about who shot him, but if you didn’t know any better you would think the mission was to drive HWA into the ground. Bulletproof defeated Warren Young in 9:43 by pinfall with a Bulletproof Stage Dive. [B][COLOR="Red"]Rating: E-[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR="Red"]Final Rating: E[/COLOR][/B] Notes: Well the main event hurt us a bit, but it’s still fun. Young was a little upset about doing the job for someone like Bulletproof, but at least he’s still alive. More importantly our attendance shot up and the final rating wasn’t to shabby. Vital Statistics: Prestige: 3.5 ([COLOR="Green"]+.1[/COLOR]) Money: 33495 ([COLOR="Red"]-1,442[/COLOR]) Pop: 5.4 ([COLOR="Green"]+.4[/COLOR])[/CENTER]
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