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Perry Saturn?


sprinklefurball

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[QUOTE]No one seems to know where former WWE/WCW wrestler Perry Saturn is. Some of his closest friends actually believe he's not alive, but no one has proof one way or the other. At the funeral of Killer Kowalski, the whereabouts of Perry Saturn was the number one topic of conversation with a number of his friends saying they didn't believe he was still alive. Every few months or so, his friends ask Dave Meltzer of the [URL="http://www.wrestlingobserver.com/"]Wrestling Observer[/URL] to do a missing persons search on him, but it always turns up with nothing.[/QUOTE] [url]http://www.impactwrestling.com/Content.aspx?ID=21542[/url] [url]http://www.pwmania.com/newsarticle.php?page=227306504[/url] O_o Missing?
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Who are you asking about? Perry Saturn was the wrestler who along with Dean Malenko, Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero came to WWF Raw the night after Chris Benoit won the WCW World title. He had a gimmick in WWE where he was crazy and chose falling in love with a mop over falling in love with Terri Runnels (Marlena/Goldust's ex-wife).
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I never understood why Saturn didn't make it big time...if you looked at the guy, was he a guy who you'd say something bad about his mama to? No, sir. And, contrary to New Jack for example, this guy had plenty of speed and ability as well. Even with his worst gimmicks, he did the best he could.
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[QUOTE=BlueStar;517912]I never understood why Saturn didn't make it big time...if you looked at the guy, was he a guy who you'd say something bad about his mama to? No, sir. And, contrary to New Jack for example, this guy had plenty of speed and ability as well. Even with his worst gimmicks, he did the best he could.[/QUOTE] I agree... I hope he's alright... I actually really enjoyed all of his Moppy business, and, well, pretty much everything else he did.
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[QUOTE=Crychon;517939]I agree... I hope he's alright... I actually really enjoyed all of his Moppy business, and, well, pretty much everything else he did.[/QUOTE] His Moppy stuff was great (a rip off of Chavo's Pepe in WCW, right?) But wasn't the whole Moppy thing because he stiffed someone in a dark match? And I think he stiffed someone with a dropkick in ECW when they did a run in for Taz (I forget the name). What was the deal with the dress though?
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[QUOTE=infinitywpi;517316]Dean MAlenko's gotta be wondering why he was the sane/safe one out of that group...[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=fatallylost;517376]I say it's because he's the ice man.[/QUOTE] I say it's because he's the "Man of the 1000 holds". So he knows a way out of everything! Side note: Friends of mine have christened my father as "The Dad of 1000 holds" because of similar raspy voices. :D But seriously, I really hope Saturn is alright because I also agree with people in here saying how talented he was as a worker. And I also believe him and Kronus (wasn't it him?) as the Eliminators was such a bad ass tag team and I think them along with The Dudleys and other ECW tag teams revolutionised tag team wrestling to another level.
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[QUOTE=BlueStar;517912]I never understood why Saturn didn't make it big time...if you looked at the guy, was he a guy who you'd say something bad about his mama to? No, sir. And, contrary to New Jack for example, this guy had plenty of speed and ability as well. Even with his worst gimmicks, he did the best he could.[/QUOTE] My understanding is he had a bit of an attitude problem in the WWE. He wound up taking out his frustrations on enhancement talent/try outs in dark matches and got on Vince's bad side. One of the guys he beat up in the ring is a co host of wrestling show on the radio in Orlando Florida. Occasionally he'd tell the story of how he botched a spot and the next thing he knows Saturn is shooting on him and trying to hurt him legit. Apparently that was the second such incident involving Saturn.
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He was in the dog house for all three major promotions he worked in at one time or another to my understanding. Once in ECW and WWE for stiffing and I am not sure what he did exactly in WCW but if he was made to wear a dress for several months, he must've pissed someone off.
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[QUOTE=AfRoMaN36;518422]He was in the dog house for all three major promotions he worked in at one time or another to my understanding. Once in ECW and WWE for stiffing and I am not sure what he did exactly in WCW but if he was made to wear a dress for several months, he must've pissed someone off.[/QUOTE] I don't know where you got the ECW thing from; he was clearly being positioned for a major singles run before he left, and was also one of the main trainers at their dojo. The only heat on him was after he left. As for the dress, that was widely reported as being his idea, which is backed up by the fact he lost to Chris Jericho [I]who was already confirmed as leaving the promotion[/I] specifically so that he could continue wearing it.
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And if anyone reading this isn't sure why it's such a big deal ("Hey, wrestlers die/vanish all the time"), well... Saturn was an ex-Army Ranger who... well, I'll let his Wikipedia article say it: [quote] In April 2004, Satullo was shot three times in the neck with a .25 caliber handgun while foiling an attempted rape, suffering severe damage to his C-5, C-6, and C-7 vertebrae. Saturn only learned of this after he visited a physician and complained of burning sensations in his neck, originally attributing the impact to a punch from behind. After having steel plates and screws inserted into his neck, Saturn returned to the ring on September 17, 2004, and continued to receive epidural treatment.[/quote] This isn't a wrestler we're talking about, this is a bona-fide action hero who got shot -three times- -in the neck- -preventing a rape-, and thought he just got punched really hard. That, my friends, is Big Goddamn Hero territory right there. If Saturn really is gone, then the world's lost a good person.
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[QUOTE=infinitywpi;518651]And if anyone reading this isn't sure why it's such a big deal ("Hey, wrestlers die/vanish all the time"), well... Saturn was an ex-Army Ranger who... well, I'll let his Wikipedia article say it: This isn't a wrestler we're talking about, this is a bona-fide action hero who got shot -three times- -in the neck- -preventing a rape-, and thought he just got punched really hard. That, my friends, is Big Goddamn Hero territory right there. If Saturn really is gone, then the world's lost a good person.[/QUOTE] Jesus Christ he no sold gunshots to the neck. Big time awesome, and something I did not know. Hope everything's okay.
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My favorite saturn moment - The whole moppy-crazy storyline Best moment in the storyline: Dudley Boyz versus Dean Malenko & Perry Saturn. Saturn steals D-Von's glasses from the announcer's table does wuzzup on top of the top rope with Bubba splits Malenko's legs and Perry Saturn hits Malenko from the top rope head hitting Malenko's crotch like the Dudley Boyz used to do do. Then, Perry shoves D-Von and says "D-Von, get the muffins!" "You're welcome" And then they 3d'ed him.
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[QUOTE=sprinklefurball;518670]My favorite saturn moment - The whole moppy-crazy storyline Best moment in the storyline: Dudley Boyz versus Dean Malenko & Perry Saturn. Saturn steals D-Von's glasses from the announcer's table does wuzzup on top of the top rope with D-Von splits Malenko's legs and Perry Saturn hits Malenko from the top rope head hitting like the Dudley Boyz do. Then, Perry shoves D-Von and says "D-Von, get the muffins!"[/QUOTE] LOL, the muffins part was, indeed, one of the most brilliant spots in wrestling history. Right there with Sid Vicious's "half the brain that you do" gaff. I was also fond of the death of moppy at Raven's hands. Loved how the damn mop seemed to get stuck halfway through the woodchipper, leaving Raven to do the fake moppy voice for an extended period of time while he tried to feed the damn thing through. I really hope Perry is okay. With any luck, maybe he just decided to say "**** it" and moved off to some foreign land to live in peace. I'd hate to know that such a terrific worker and all around good person (no sold BULLETS! C'mon!) might've died so tragically. The man deserves a good long life.
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