Darin Walker Posted March 3, 2014 Share Posted March 3, 2014 Boring backstory: Modern real world data, February to be exact. So modernish, anyway. Started at the bottom with fifty bazillion dollars, decided to call it War That Fights Wrestling. Now on with the show... February, Thursday Week 3 War That Fights Wrestling Presents: Anomalous Ignition! Did I spell that wrong? Hell with it, I already printed the fliers. Live before a sold out crowd in your mom's basement Cheerleader Melissa and Justin Credible vs The Briscoes Because I like random pairings. The Briscoes win, of course, because their team has less Target employees. Melissa still rules, for the record. Rating: D Sean Morley comes out naked with a copy of Better Homes and Gardens, and proceeds to read a few articles for the audience. He's so sweet. Rating: D+ Perry Saturn vs Madison Eagles vs LuFisto vs Jessie McKay vs ??? Also known as, everyone I had no plans for. The last participant is unnamed. Every time the announcer tried to say it, he just couldn't. Odd. Perry Saturn wins over Jessie McKay, because I have an irrational affection for him. Rating E+ The next segment I had planned in my script was wiped out by beer stains and cigarette burns, so I just told Colt Cabana to go out for ten minutes and be funny. This is rarely a poor idea. Rating D+ Roderick Strong vs Colt Cabana Colt fared less well in this one, as Strong is a psychic. Yeah, who knew? Strong wins, as he said he saw coming. I'm not sure he knows what psychic means. Rating D Jay Lethal has himself an interview, copying the mannerisms of Hulk Hogan. Because why not, really? Funny to see him call the microphone stand Mean Gene though. Rating D+ Main Event of Doom! Jay Lethal vs Ashley Lane These two tore down the house, proving that everything I book is awesome. Lethal puts Lane down with the Leg Drop for the win. Rating C- Final Show Rating C- Lethal and Ashley got praised for being awesome. Melissa got hugged because I'm a dirty old man. More to come when I write it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darin Walker Posted March 4, 2014 Author Share Posted March 4, 2014 <p>It occured to me that with a nice plump bank account, there's no reason to restrict myself to monthly events. So we're switching to a touring schedule. </p><p> </p><p> <strong>War That Fights Wrestling Weekly, recommended by nine out of ten dentists for your Monday entertainment.</strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong>??? and Scarlett Bordeaux vs The Briscoes</strong></p><p> </p><p> I really ought to go tag team shopping. The Briscoes win it when they hit He Who Cannot Be Named with spike piledriver.</p><p> </p><p> Rating D-</p><p> </p><p> "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan has arrived at the arena. And by arena, I mean high school gym. But he has definitely arrived.</p><p> </p><p> Rating E</p><p> </p><p> Next up is a music video for Ashley Lane. Being the cheap sort, it's more of a slideshow with a beatboxer, but she still looks good regardless.</p><p> </p><p> Rating E+</p><p> </p><p> Justin Credible was out next to babble about his upcoming match with Perry Saturn. No one cared, least of all me.</p><p> </p><p> Rating E-</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Perry Saturn vs Justin Credible</strong></p><p> </p><p> I think Justin got a few punches in, at least. Perry destroyed him anyway, for my amusement. Only reason I hired him anyway.</p><p> </p><p> Rating F+</p><p> </p><p> I blame Justin</p><p> </p><p> Colt Cabana is out here to bring the awesome, as always, when he is interrupted by Ashley Lane. She jumps him and strips him down to his thong panties. Uh, I think someone got the script turned around here.</p><p> </p><p> Rating D-</p><p> The segment lifted the crowd?!?! Ok....</p><p> </p><p> Jay Lethal was out for an interview, but I think he was a bit traumatized by the last segment, as he was off his game a bit.</p><p> </p><p> Rating E+</p><p> </p><p> Jim Duggan is walking. Yes indeed.</p><p> </p><p> Rating E</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Madison Eagles vs Jay Lethal</strong></p><p> </p><p> A good back and forth match that Madison almost took, before Lethal hit the Axe Bomber for the victory.</p><p> </p><p> Rating D</p><p> </p><p> Jim Duggan has left the building. I repeat, Jim Duggan has left the building.</p><p> </p><p> Rating E</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Roderick Strong vs Paul London</strong></p><p> </p><p> London insisted on being announced as Paul London-Backlund, after his father, the great Bob Backlund. His ancestry was not enough to overcome the mind reader Strong, who cleaned him up with a crossface chickenwing of his own.</p><p> </p><p> Rating D</p><p> </p><p> Colt Cabana is back again, this time wearing multiple layers as he discusses his upcoming grudge match against Ashley. Thirty minutes in the making!</p><p> </p><p> Rating D-</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Ashley Lane vs Colt Cabana</strong></p><p> </p><p> Cabana was out for revenge, but Ashley was too crafty, going to yank his pants down and throwing him off his game. He managed a comeback near the end, but Ashley rolled him up, grabbing a handful of tights and putting her feet on the ropes for good measure.</p><p> </p><p> Rating D</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Final Rating - D</strong></p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mistaken Posted March 5, 2014 Share Posted March 5, 2014 nice first show Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.