Wrestlers of Mass Destruction: A Sweet Nice Little Wrestling Show (Cverse)

Greylocke · May 23, 2017

Greetings all, the show is slightly delayed due to me waiting for Greylocke to respond the new prize I offered him

Sorry for the wait, I don't log in here too often. Have replied to the PM. Thanks!

Pteroid · May 31, 2017

http://i.imgur.com/uNqgQ1T.jpg

Phil Vibert:

"Hey hey, folks, welcome back to Vibert's Voice, big thanks to our sponsor, GrappleTees.com, with stores by all the major indy stars and a few of your favorite regulars of the con circuit, GrappleTees.com is your one stop net shop for all your t-shirt needs. Now folks, it's that special time of month when we check in with a man that's very near and dear to all our hearts, one who is probably inebriated right about now, it's Marshall from Macon."

Marshall:

"Hello, Phil."

Vibert:

"Marsh, you sound...sober."

Marsh:

"Why wouldn't I, Phil? I'm loving life, just...loving every minute of it, y'know? WMD has given me a new lease on life and what really matters, you wanna know why?"

Vibert:

"Uh...why, man who sounds way too unlike himself?"|

Marsh:

"Because every moment I'm out here is another moment I'm not WATCHING THIS ABSOLUTE GARBAGE-STENCH *************SHOW!"

Vibert:

"There's the man I know!"

Marsh:

"Sit your ass down, Vibert-"

Vibert:

"I'm already sitting."

Marsh:

"Then stand up and sit down again, because this is:

SHOVELING THE WRESTLECRAP

WITH MARSHALL FROM MACON!

Vibert:

"Wow...is that what I sound like doing that? Loud."

Marsh:

"Let's do this, we start the night off right and by right I mean left because the Intolerant Left-what the literal f*** kind of name is that? Rhetorical question, it's a stupid one.- come on out with mics in hand as New York Red and Sheik Ali Al-Avatar cut a disjointed as all hell promo. Gist here is Red says some regurgitated progressive hippy talking point and Sheiky immediately undercuts him with some kind of Islamic stereotype to the point where I half expected him to start going 'durka durka durka'."

Vibert:

"..."

Marsh:

"What, you never seen Team America?"

Vibert:

"Nope."

Marsh:

"The people who have are dying right now, trust me. Anyway, Red says they're gonna bring WMD into the 21st century, starting by a forced disarmament of the Silencer and by making Hawkeye Calhoun take up soccer-sorry, football as the new national pastime."

Vibert:

"That's...kinda okay for a heel promo."

Marsh:

"I feel like Red is having waaaaay too much fun getting this paycheck. So out come our star spangled heroes with Gianna-who remains as useless and unenthusiastic as ever-to clear house and the match is on. Hawkeye started the match on fire, laying into the two heels like they'd just told him they'd both come back from making sweet love to his mom-which considering the gimmick, probably isn't too far from the truth. Anyway you know the formula here, of course Hawkeye gets a cheap shot from Sheiky and the two heels work him over while Silencer tries to get the tag. Gianna tries to get the crowd to rally but I swear to god I saw her checking her phone at one point so you can guess her commitment to this company. I mean, I don't wanna be that guy because then I'd be this company's target audience, but she's literally only around so Redwood's got someone to shake their cans on command."

Vibert:

"Man you really dislike her, huh?"

Marsh:

"She's cheap and hot and that's it! You're telling me there's no one on the scene that's both that and talented?"

Vibert:

"Could be, could also be that person wouldn't wanna work for Giant Redwood."

Marsh:

"Yoooou have a point actually. Okay moving on, Silencer finally gets the hot tag and cleans house, bunch of near falls for him until everyone starts brawling and Red rolls up Hawkeye with the tights grabbed for the win. Before you ask, Hawkeye wasn't the legal man and neither was Red but y'know, lolWMD."

Vibert:

"I'm unsure how to process this..."

Marsh:

"You don't have time to, because here comes the weirdest hardcore four-way that isn't on a deep web browser! We got Yellow Belly Billy, we got Leopard King and his tiny tiny traumitizing briefs, then Jazz Funk, and finally Mad Dog Mortimer. Now you may be asking yourself how 'Hardcore Mayhem' works in a 'family friendly' wrestling show and the answer to that iiiiis...poorly. More like a cheap slapstick routine than a match, the weapons included padded chairs and wiffle ball bats. I swear Mortimer smacked Jazz over the head with a bowling pin at one point, and not like an actual one a plastic toy bowling pin."

Vibert:

"So DAVE this was not."

Marsh:

"That's a big no, Phil. Anyway Leopard King finally pinned Billy after a big splash on the mat, and lemme tell ya, that pin showed faaaaaar too much of him. He beat his flabby chest and stormed off, the losers in tow selling absolutely nothing, and that's about what I expected from the WMD midcard, but then we got ourselves a real humdinger of a segment because out comes everyone's favorite, The Grapple Goblin!"

http://i.imgur.com/M1zqLGB.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

Marsh:

"Uh...the hell?"

Vibert:

"We got fan art, Marsh!"

Marsh:

"Yeesh, that's many many moments of someone's life they aren't likely to get back. But what the hell, far be it for me to tell anyone what's a waste of their time, look what I'M doing. So yeah, he comes out, tries to steal from the merch table when Skippy the Clown comes out to stop him. Skippy says he's tired of Grapple Gobiln's shenanigans and come next month he's going to take the little jerk down in a 'Loser Leaves Town' match!"

Vibert:

"Really? At like their sixth show?"

Marsh:

"Gotta put butts in the seats, brother. Hopefully they don't wrestle in mud again for this. Anyway, Goblin accepts and the match is set for next month, so that'll be fun to see which of these two gets sent packing before the inevitable repackage. And then...we got to the segment before our main event. Everyone we are now at the very edge of the wrestling black hole I'm about to describe to you so those of you who value their sanity should probably get off the crazy train here. HERE COMES ANDERS THUNDER WITH A PROMO!"

Vibert:

"Oh my god, I need some popcorn."

Marsh:

"And y'know what? I got a recording of it right here. Here's Anders Thunder, cutting a promo on Canadian Executioner while the cage is set up."

http://i.imgur.com/yDytQDT.jpg

Anders Thunder:

"CANAYDYUN EXECYUSHIONER! YOU MYAPLE LYEAF GIRLY MAN, YOU ATTACK ANDERS THUNDER, YOU WILL FEEL THE LYIGHTNING, JA! IN FRONT OF MANY MANY OF MYY THYUNDERHYEADS I WILL PYAY YEW BYACK IN THIS CAGE FOR MY RAGE! THERE WILL BE NO HYOPE FOR YEW WHEN I HIT YEW WITH THE THYUNDERHEADBUTT AND DESTROOOOYYY YEEEEEWWWWWW!!!"

Vibert:

"Wow...he uh...really went for that, huh?"

Marsh:

"Enough spit coming out of his mouth the first row had to be designated a splash zone. But you may be asking 'Marsh, how could that promo cover the cage getting set up? It barely lasted long at all!'"

Vibert:

"Huh, now that you mention it..."

Marsh:

"Well ya see, it didn't, so Anders, the genius promo man he is, just repeats his promo. Again. And again. And again until the cage is up."

Vibert:

"And people say wrestling isn't art."

Marsh:

"Finally he's in the cage, so Canadian Executioner comes out and the bell rings and the both go out of the cage and start brawling."

Vibert:

"I'm sorry, what?"

Marsh:

"You heard me, Phil, not since the Sam Strong days of Hollyweird has a main event veered this far into absurdity. Yes much like the Strong/Dread main event of HGC Threatening Behavior 97 have we seen two big goons start brawling outside in a cage match. I assume, at least. Anyway these dinguses throw the tamest punches you'll ever see out of guys this big dish out while lightly walking around the ring. Naturally USA chants occur because of course they do and finally Anders smashes Executioner into the cage before tossing him in and the real match begins...which is a crying shame as Executioner's already sucking wind and according to my watch it'd already been like five minutes. These two, I kid you not, spent almost double digit minutes of this match exchanging bearhugs with Executioner loudly wheezing out spots that never worked because he was too tired to actually do them so he just went back to the stupid ****ing bearhug. When ANDERS THUNDER is the workhorse o a match, you know you're in a dumpster fire."

Vibert:

"How uh...how long did this match go?"

Marsh:

[unhinged laughter]

Vibert:

"Hoooo boy..."

Marsh:

"Heheh, so Thunder goes for his helmet headbutt, but he misses and hits the cage wall and it goes flying. Executioner smashes Anders with his own helmet for a near fall, Executioner picks Anders back up-by which I mean Anders got up with Executioner lightly holding on to his hair-and goes for a military press...so Anders falls on him and wins.:

Vibert:

"Lord."

Marsh:

"God is dead, Phil, Giant Redwood killed him. So after that we aren't done because Anders yanks Executioner onto his ass and unmasks him to reveal:

http://i.imgur.com/UNuHpov.jpg

Murderous Mikey!

"Y'know, Murderous Mikey, a guy who's career highlights include absolutely nothing more than being big and scary behind some indy manager. Nobody cares, this match sucked and I wanted to go home. But sadly Redwood had other ideas because the Intolerant Left showed up again, this time to lay a beatdown on Anders with an American Flag! Why!? The only American in this situation is Red and he's heel! They start choking him out with it and the cavalry arrives! Silencer and Hawkeye? No you morons, it's GIANT REDWOOD HIMSELF!"

Vibert:

"Oh my god, is he trying to get himself over in his own company?"

Marsh:

"You bet your ass he is! He comes out and cleans house of the baddies in the lamest limpest way I could possibly imagine, then gives Red his signature standing splash before tossing him out and cutting a promo on the heels."

Vibert:

"Marsh, Marsh please..."

Marsh:

"Of course I have it recorded right here!"

http://i.imgur.com/Uj39dFF.jpg

Redwood:

"The **** yew think yer goin' city boy!? Yew and yer buddies there're real good at a Perl Hahbor jawb but lemme tell yew somethin' ya librul ******, next month ya'll ain't gonna have NOWHERE to run, ya wanna know why!? Cuz next month, in MAH hometown of Bogsworth Georjuh, we're havin' us an event! An event to save a statue of that town's hero, a HERO of the War 'tween the States, Genruhl Robert Bow-ree-gard an' AT that event, ya'll're gunna be in the main event against THREE handpicked sons'a Dixie in a FLAAAAAAAAAG MATCH! And iffin' ya'll don't show up, YER FIRED!"

Vibert:

"Oh my god..."

Marsh:

"FAMILY FRIENDLYYYYY~!"

Vibert:

"A benefit show for a Confederate Statue? And who's Robert Beauregard?"

Marsh:

"Guy who advocated setting fugitive slaves on fire, ole 'Burn the Negro' Beauregard they called him. Personal hero of Giant Redwood folks, what a guy!"

Vibert:

"Oh f***...I need a drink after that."

Marsh:

"We all do, Phil, we all do."

Vibert:

"See ya all next month for...whatever the hell this show is called.[/b]

Marsh:

"The South Rises Again, Phil, it'll be called The South Rises Again."

Vibert:

"For Marshall From Macon, I'm Phil Vibert, see you all next time."

Herrbear · June 1, 2017

Lol!!!!

NoobzUnite · June 1, 2017

Pteroid? Will you marry me??? <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/biggrin.png.929299b4c121f473b0026f3d6e74d189.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

I read the entire Anders Thunder promo in the voice of Arnold Schwarzenegger and I legit couldn't stop laughing. Then the Giant Redwood promo simply put icing on the cake. Thank you for a much needed laugh and keep the:

SHOVELING THE WRESTLECRAP WITH MARSHALL FROM MACON!!!

coming please <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/biggrin.png.929299b4c121f473b0026f3d6e74d189.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Pteroid · June 2, 2017

<div style="text-align:center;">http://i.imgur.com/oIa0sct.jpg

WRESTLERS OF MASS DESTRUCTION PRESENTS:

THE SOUTH RISES AGAIN 2016

@ The Bogsworth Barn

Doors open @ 5 PM, Belltime at 7 PM

FLAG MATCH MAIN EVENT

Team Dixie (??? ??? & ???) vs Team Yankee (New York Red, Murderous Mikey, and Sheik Ali Al-Avatar)

LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCH

Skippy the Clown vs The Grapple Goblin

SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH

Yellow Belly Billy vs The Debuting Steel!

A TAG TEAM MATCH

Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer vs The Outhousers (Mad Dog Mortimer & ???)</div>

MightyDavidson · June 2, 2017

Flag Match Main Event

Team Dixie wins this one because mystery opponents tend to and Giant Redwood strikes me as the sort who'd job out the Liberals.

Loser Leaves Town Match

Grapple Goblin wins because he's the most popular guy there.

Special Challenge Match

Steel wins his debut, because Yellow Belly Billy is a jobber.

A Tag Team Match

I'm going with Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer.

Pteroid · June 2, 2017

Bit of miscellaneous stuff here but uh...this happened...

http://i.imgur.com/Aqpdiu5.png

Big Roguey · June 2, 2017

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Pteroid" data-cite="Pteroid" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="43470" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Bit of miscellaneous stuff here but uh...this happened... http://i.imgur.com/Aqpdiu5.png</div></blockquote> I still demand answers!

Pteroid · June 2, 2017

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="MHero" data-cite="MHero" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="43470" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>I still demand answers!</div></blockquote> The guru works in mysterious ways

MightyDavidson · June 2, 2017

Bit of miscellaneous stuff here but uh...this happened...

http://i.imgur.com/Aqpdiu5.png

What happened? I feel like I'm missing something here, most likely because I am.

Herrbear · June 2, 2017

FLAG MATCH MAIN EVENT

Team Dixie (??? ??? & ???) vs Team Yankee (New York Red, Murderous Mikey, and Sheik Ali Al-Avatar)

LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCH

Skippy the Clown vs The Grapple Goblin

SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH

Yellow Belly Billy vs The Debuting Steel!

A TAG TEAM MATCH

Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer vs The Outhousers (Mad Dog Mortimer & ???)

Pteroid · June 2, 2017

What happened? I feel like I'm missing something here, most likely because I am.

Atom Smasher, formerly Captain Atomic of SWF, the poster boy for muscular gimmicky sports entertainer is now the figurehead for per>pop CZCW

Chaos Zarak · June 4, 2017

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Pteroid" data-cite="Pteroid" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="43470" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div><div style="text-align:center;">http://i1168.photobucket.com/albums/r496/aaronredwulfstudioswillr0ck/TEW/WOMD_3.jpg WRESTLERS OF MASS DESTRUCTION PRESENTS: THE SOUTH RISES AGAIN 2016 @ The Bogsworth Barn Doors open @ 5 PM, Belltime at 7 PM FLAG MATCH MAIN EVENT Team Dixie (??? ??? & ???) vs Team Yankee (New York Red, Murderous Mikey, and Sheik Ali Al-Avatar) LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCH Skippy the Clown vs The Grapple Goblin SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH Yellow Belly Billy vs The Debuting Steel! A TAG TEAM MATCH Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer vs The Outhousers (Mad Dog Mortimer & ???)</div></div></blockquote> I am still recovering from laughing so much at the last show... From grapple goblin fan art to Anders thunders promo... But I did mark out to giant redwood coming out... I make no secret that I push him to the moon in c-verse 97 games... Now for predictions Team Dixie who must contain giant redwood and Anders thunder (and some one else who is just there to make up the numbers... Probably jazz funk) will defeat the heels in another match of the year contenders like every match containing the wrestling GODs of Anders and redwood... Grapple goblin must win... In fact I will be the guy in the crowd with the if grapple goblin lose I riot sign... Another potential wrestling god will arrive in steel... He will win and become a top contender to face Anders very quickly... I may be crazy for picking them but mad dog and his partner who I am hoping will be leopard king in some odd couple pairing will win...

Hyde Hill · June 4, 2017

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="MightyDavidson" data-cite="MightyDavidson" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="43470" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Flag Match Main Event Team Dixie wins this one because mystery opponents tend to and Giant Redwood strikes me as the sort who'd job out the Liberals. Loser Leaves Town Match Grapple Goblin wins because he's the most popular guy there. Special Challenge Match Steel wins his debut, because Yellow Belly Billy is a jobber. A Tag Team Match I'm going with Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer.</div></blockquote> I second these picks and the reasoning.

Kitarzu · June 5, 2017

FLAG MATCH MAIN EVENT

Team Dixie (??? ??? & ???) vs Team Yankee (New York Red, Murderous Mikey, and Sheik Ali Al-Avatar)

???, ??? & ??? = Jack Griffith, Buzz Reid & Giant Redwood!

LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCH

Skippy the Clown vs The Grapple Goblin

1/4 - 1/3 of the Vibert's excitement comes from TGG.

SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH

Yellow Belly Billy vs The Debuting Steel!

Let's move towards to The Battle of Juice!

A TAG TEAM MATCH

Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer vs The Outhousers (Mad Dog Mortimer & ???)

??? = Mercy Michaels.

Greylocke · June 7, 2017

FLAG MATCH MAIN EVENT

Team Dixie (??? ??? & ???) vs Team Yankee (New York Red, Murderous Mikey, and Sheik Ali Al-Avatar)

Team Dixie = Giant Redwood and Anders Thunder obviously.....no clue about the 3rd guy, but Redwood + Thunder = auto-win, even if they're teaming with that Yellow Belly joke who calls himself a wrestler.

LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCH

Skippy the Clown vs The Grapple Goblin

Grapple Goblin can't lose this! The WMD needs its mascot! If GG leaves I stop watching. <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/frown.png.e6b571745a30fe6a6f2e918994141a47.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH

Yellow Belly Billy vs The Debuting Steel!

If YBB wins, I riot!

A TAG TEAM MATCH

Hawkeye Calhoun and The Silencer vs The Outhousers (Mad Dog Mortimer & ???)

Curtman · June 7, 2017

I'm loving this diary. It's such a great thing to read whenever I just need a laugh. Grapple Goblin is easily my favorite guy (who is he, btw?).

FLAG MATCH MAIN EVENT:

Team Dixie vs. Team Yankee

I'm going with Team Dixie here; it's taking place in Georgia so it only makes sense, but then again, nothing makes sense in this company. As for the members of Team Dixie, I'll go with Giant Redwood, Anders Thunder (he does need to be on the show since he's the MOAB!!!), and I'll take a guess that it's Jazz Funk: because what's more ironic than that?

LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCH:

Skippy the Clown vs. Grapple Goblin

Grapple Goblin is the only way to go here; he's clearly the most beloved guy on the roster and should most certainly be pushed to the moon, brah!

SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH:

Yellow Belly Billy vs. Steel

Good lord, Steel and Anders Thunder should form a tag team named the Juice Group.

TAG TEAM MATCH:

The Silencer & Hawkeye Calhoun vs. The Outhousers

The Silencer & Hawkeye Calhoun should definitely be the winners. I also wouldn't be surprised if Leopard King was Mad Dog Mortimer's partner, just for the sake of comedy and irony.

Pteroid · June 8, 2017

<div style="text-align:center;">http://i.imgur.com/uNqgQ1T.jpg

Phil:

"Welcome back ladies and gentlemen to Vibert's Voice, I'd like to thank my good friend John "Nemesis" Campbell for joining me for my recap of Invincibility VI and I'll remind you all that next month we'll have none other than CJ Weston and MC Motormouth on the show in the interest of covering the other side of the West Coast Wars. But from the West Coast to the Gulf, we're primed and ready for one of our fan favorite segments so without further ado, let's get Marshall From Macon on the line, Marsh?"

Familiar Voice:

"Howdy, Phil!"

Phil:

"What the...Shane, is that you!?"

Shane Sneer:

"Yessir, and I got Marsh with me."

Marsh:

"Phil I don't know whether to punch you in the mouth or hug ya because I finally got to meet one of my idols at one of the ****iest wrestling shows I've ever seen."

Phil:

"Shane what are you doing with Marsh?"

Shane:

"Well didn't I say I had to see one of these trainwrecks-heh, Trainwreck-"

Marsh:

"No spoilers, Shane."

Shane:

"Suffice it to say, I gave ya fair warning, Phil. So I went to this show and looked for the sourest fella in the place and low and behold I find Marshall here."

Marsh:

"He asked if he could review the show with me and we hung out the whole night."

Shane:

"Lemme tell ya, that was an experience."

Phil:

"Well then, if we're going for a double review I guess it's time for:

SHOVELING THE WRESTLECRAP:

WITH MARSHALL FROM MACON

(and Shane)

Marsh:

"I don't think it's a good sign I'm not bothered by that noise anymore."

Shane:

"Shall we start with the first match?"

Marsh:

"Can't think of a much better way to start it, our first bout of the evening saw the debut of the new tag team 'The Outhousers', which is Mad Dog Mortimer and his new partner...Phil, you wanna guess who it was?"

Phil:

"One of the Hillbillies? Cowboy Buck Winchester? Leo Davis?"

Marsh:

"Nope, who was it, Shane?"

Shane:

"Some little so'n so named <a href="http://i.imgur.com/VFq1nAD.jpg" rel="external nofollow">Fearless Blue</a>, now Marsh you filled me in on this little fella, some kinda backyard wrestler?"

Phil:

"Oh RIGHT, he was one of those XDW guys, heh. Crazy bunch of spot monkeys, but I guess I can't begrudge a man finding work."

Marsh:

"Eh, if by work you mean him and Mad Dog getting their hillbilly asses handed to them by Hawkeye and Silencer then yeah. I was kinda weirded out because I figured those two would've been in the flag match in the main event but that got...a lot weirder. Speaking of which, 'ole Redwood came out next for a promo to not-quite kick off the show and to introduce two members of Team Dixie."

Phil:

"And they were?"

Shane:

"Well first he brought out Leopard King and Marsh undersold how...underdressed that fella was. I just wanna point out that our first member of the Team Dixie was a Mexican man but I suppose you can't get much more south than south of the border."

Marsh:

"And the other, surprising literally no one, was old Roid Rage himself, <a href="http://i.imgur.com/k6mJA26.jpg" rel="external nofollow">Anders Thunder sporting a new look</a> after his helmet apparently got trashed in his cage match..."

Phil:

"Aw, then that means the fan art's out of date."

Shane & Marsh:

"Fan Art?"

Phil:

"Yeah!"

http://i.imgur.com/U1K2xf7.jpg

Phil:

"Same person who drew the Grapple Goblin picture!"

Shane:

"Well ain't that the cutest little steroid junkie ya ever did see?"

Marsh:

"God help us when they get around to the Sheik...anyway, our poroud sons of Dixie are at this point a Mexican in tiny speedos and a steroidal Swede. Now around this point is when New York Red, Sheik Ali Al-Avatar, and Murderous Mikey showed up. Red cut a promo on Redwood, saying that much like a tree he was big, rigid, and rooted in the past. Red declared that while he was all about saving the trees, tonight he and his cohorts would leave him chopped down to size!"

Phil:

"Sounds like a decent promo."

Shane:

"Compared to Redwood's drunken slobbering on the mic, it may as well have been Rip Chord in his prime."

Marsh:

"After the assembled face and heel goon squads wandered off, we got Yellow Belly Billy out for his monthly beating which this week came at the hands of Steel, who everyone probably knows from his two-year stint in RIPW and his shorter stint in jail for steroid possession. The Juice got loose all over Yellow Belly Billy and I think Steel overdid it because the fans were booing his flexing and posing before the match was out. Finally Billy got put out of his misery with a neckbreaker that certainly looked like it belonged in RIPW and Steel posed his way out o the building while the fans booed him."

Shane:

"I hope that Billy kid has work somewhere else that appreciates him because if his selling was anything to go by, he can wrestle circles around most of the roster. But now we come to the match everyone was waiting to see."

Marsh:

"A Loser Leaves Town match between Skippy the Clown and the Grapple Goblin!"

http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

Shane:

"Hooboy I never get tired of looking at that silly mug."

Phil:

"Amen, Shane."

Marsh:

"Well these two came to play with this one, as the Grapple Goblin-"

http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

"-started off by waylaying Skippy mid-entrance and stealing his clown shoes, so poor Skippy had to wrestle in socks the whole time. The ref was pretty lax with the rules as most of the spots revolved around the Grapple Goblin's-"

http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

"-sack of loot beings used as either a weapon or a thing to pull weapons out of. We're talking merchandise, bowling pins-"

Shane:

"Don't forget the rubber chicken."

Marsh:

"Oh yeah, Skippy whacked old GG with a rubber chicken at one point, that got a laugh. Ultimately, Skippy managed to grab a dodgeball out of the bag and tried to hit GG with it only to miss and hit head official Alvin Lavin right in the face. Fan caught the ball by the way. So Skippy tries to revive the ref like a good face while Grapple Goblin-"

http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

"-grabbed the clown shoes he stole earlier and put them on. The Goblin ambushed Skippy again with a roll up and clown-shoe assisted pair of feet on the ropes saw him pin Skippy to retain his place on the WMD roster. The Goblin celebrated by stealing everything in sight and running off with a cackle as Skippy despondently walked to the back, never to be seen again until he comes back under a mask because that's how this ALWAYS happens."

Shane:

"I give it six months."

Marsh:

"I give it three. But now we get to the reveal of the third and final member of Team Dixie! Any guesses who it was?"

Phil:

"Redwood himself?"

Marsh:

"Nope, though he did come out to cut a promo on how he wished he could do it but sadly his goodly wife begged him not to return to the ring and he respected her wishes. No we had a debuting son of Dixie show up for this match, none other than the one...the only...

http://i.imgur.com/GmbgcDq.jpg

"PENFOLD PERDITION!"

Shane:

"Which side DID Hawaii fight on in the Civil War?"

Marsh:

"Hawaii was still its own nation at the time, but that's neither here nor there as "The Big Baby" was not wrestling under his usual moniker but under the brand new character of the Pain Train. And he proceeded to cut a promo on Team Yankee which we have a recording of...right here."

http://i.imgur.com/GmbgcDq.jpg

"Dubya Em Dee, the Pain Train is pullin' into the station, the pain station, where the Train Wrecks happen. That's my move, the Train Wreck, bee-tee-dubs. Tonight in the Bogsworth Barn, for Dubya Em Dee, the Pain Train is gunna take ya city boys to the Pain Station with the Train Wreck in the barn, the barn that's in Bogsworth! Then I'll pin ya-"

[Whisperwhisper]

"-then me or...these other southern-?-boys are gonna take down that flag! After I Train Wreck you in the barn in Bogsworth by pulling you into Pain Station where the trainwrecks happen in the barn in Bogsworth. ...kay?"

"JA!"

"...ya guys realize I'm from Haywaii, righ-?"

[Click]

Phil:

"...lord almighty."

Shane:

"Round and round the promo goes, where it stops, nobody knows."

Marsh:

"So with both teams making their entrances and the flags set up-Confederate for Team Dixie and Union for Team Yankee because subtlety is a foreign language and anyone who knows it should learn to speak American-our main event was on! It was mostly a god awful brawl with the faces taking turns doing moves on Red in the ring between bouts of trading fists with Sheiky and Mikey."

Shane:

"God bless old Red, by the way, only man on the heel team who knew how to sell worth a damn."

Marsh:

"He's also the only white American in this Confederate Circlejerk, I'd say it was a clever commentary but Redwood would probably yell at me for mispronouncing the the word 'Cleaver' if I did. Anyway all the faces take turns hitting the same body splash finisher on Red while Sheiky tried to sneak his way to grabbing the flag to win the match, but Pain Train yanked him off the top rope before nailing him with the most low impact discus clothesline I've ever seen. He then shouted 'Trainwreck' between huffs and puffs for air as Anders grabbed his flag for Team Dixie for the win."

Phil:

"So on a show called The South Rises Again-"

Marsh:

"The South Rises Again 2016, so this is gonna be a yearly event because God hates me for that crack about Redwood killing him."

Phil:

"On this event, we had a pair of hillbillies get beaten easily, a showoff male model successfully debuts, a Goblin beats a Clown, and Team Dixie-containing no Southerners-beat Team Yankee-which included the only white American in the match."

Shane:

"That about covers it, yeah."

Phil:

"...WELL that's all the time we got this month, remember to tune in next month-"

Marsh:

"Next month? Next WEEK."

Phil:

"Huh?"

Marsh:

"Next event is gonna happen in the same place in Bogsworth on the Fourth of July."

Shane:

"Same day as Independence Day Slam."

Phil:

"Whuff, they're gonna get slaughtered...hey, it just occurred to me, this was a benefit wasn't it? To save a statue of some Confederate General?"

Marsh:

"Oh yeah, 'Burn the Negro' Beauregard."

Phil:

"Right...him. Did they raise the money or...?"

Shane:

"HA! Nope, 'ole Redwood took the money and ran."

Marsh:

"That S.O.B couldn't sell a dropkick let alone enough tickets to save that eyesore. We saw it getting demolished on the way out."

Phil:

"Well...at least we still have the Grapple Goblin."

http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!</div>

Herrbear · June 8, 2017

Great show.

DarK_RaideR · June 9, 2017

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Pteroid" data-cite="Pteroid" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="43470" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div><div style="text-align:center;">"Well...at least we still have the Grapple Goblin." http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg GRAPPLE GOBLIN!</div></div></blockquote> This is now my go-to quote for when the going gets rough in my life

Kitarzu · June 9, 2017

<div style="text-align:center;">Every time an uppercut lands a

http://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

appears on the right bottom of your screen.</div>

Pteroid · June 9, 2017

Congrats to the SIX People that managed to ace the prediction contest. Your prediction prizes will be in your PM's.

<div style="text-align:center;">http://i.imgur.com/oIa0sct.jpg

WMD PRESENTS:

THROWDOWN ON THE FOURTH!

@ The Bogsworth Barn

Doors open @ 5 PM, Belltime at 7 PM

Main Event 4 Way Championship Match

(Championship To Be Revealed)

Anders Thunder vs Steel vs Pain Train vs The Grapple Goblin

Tag Team Championship Tournament Semi-Finals

The Outhousers vs Leopard King and Jazz Funk

Silencer and Hawkeye vs The Intolerant Left

PLUS GIANT REDWOOD'S BIRTHDAY BASH!

--------

CHEAP PLUG:

I've started a secondary diary over <a href="http://greydogsoftware.com/forum/showthread.php?t=538474" rel="external nofollow">here</a>, give it a look!</div>

Rayelek · June 10, 2017

Main Event 4 Way Championship Match

(Championship To Be Revealed)

Anders Thunder vs Steel vs Pain Train vs The Grapple Goblin

Tag Team Championship Tournament Semi-Finals

The Outhousers vs Leopard King and Jazz Funk

Silencer and Hawkeye vs The Intolerant Left

Herrbear · June 10, 2017

Main Event 4 Way Championship Match

(Championship To Be Revealed)

Anders Thunder vs Steel vs Pain Train vs The Grapple Goblin

Tag Team Championship Tournament Semi-Finals

The Outhousers vs Leopard King and Jazz Funk

Silencer and Hawkeye vs The Intolerant Left

Hyde Hill · June 10, 2017

Anders Thunder vs Steel vs Pain Train vs The Grapple Goblin

The steroid guy with some star quality.

Tag Team Championship Tournament Semi-Finals

The Outhousers vs Leopard King and Jazz Funk

No idea who is heel or face here so just assuming no repeat from last show as final.

Silencer and Hawkeye vs The Intolerant Left

Silencer is actually pretty good.

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Wrestlers of Mass Destruction: A Sweet Nice Little Wrestling Show (Cverse)

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