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The Fearsome Bunsen in the UK - HIW


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HIW TV

 

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpg

 

Wednesday Week 4 January 2006

Edgware Hall, London

Attendance: 2,000

 

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http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

The Fearsome Bunsen introduces the show as always:

 

“In wave dynamics a motion starts from the smallest thing and builds and builds until something causes it to break. I feel a little like that myself at the moment. HIW is a little out of control and people are behaving wildly. Rest assured that I will be bringing things back under control.

 

“Sewer Croc, Victor Rodriguez and Marat Khoklov all took the law into their own hands last week and I won’t have it. Consider this a warning: if your behaviour continues there will be consequences.”

 

C

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpg

 

Anarchy and Jay Zero are seen on the big screen backstage. They appear to be in a car park and are standing around something burning.

 

Anarchy

“That ridiculous Welsh wannabe Red Dragon will be furious when he sees we’ve burned his gear.”

 

Jay Zero

“That’ll teach him to think that he can come after my Velocity title.”

 

Red Dragon saunters up to the two of them. He’s dressed for a fight in all his gear.

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

“Hello boyos. What’s occurring? What’s that burning?”

 

Anarchy and Jay Zero stare at each other for a moment before the bigger figure (Anarchy, Jay and Red Dragon are all cruiserweights) of Sewer Crocodile appears. He’s missing a lot of his usual strapping and scaly pads and looks furious.

 

http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

“You idiot champagne revolutionaries have burned my gear. Don’t you know who you’re messing with? This company is full of morons.

 

“Red Dragon – you’ve got a partner tonight. Let’s go.”

 

C+

 

Wave of Violence (Anarchy & Jay Zero) vs. Red Dragon & Sewer Crocodile

 

http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpghttp://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Red Dragon & Sewer Croc defeated Wave of Violence in 9:49 when Sewer Crocodile defeated Anarchy by pinfall with a handful of tights.

 

* Sewer Croc’s size advantage gives him the advantage here.

 

* Anarchy and Jay’s teamwork is a major benefit. The two of them actually like each other.

 

* But distractions and tricks don’t work so well on Sewer Croc. The big fella has zero tolerance for BS.

 

C+

 

 

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Sergei Kalashnov talks to the crowd from the ring:

 

“It appears that big Furry Russian has some ability. But still Russians are big bags of clumsy as we say in Belarus. I grew up with them throwing their weight around and enough is enough. I think Jeffery beats you tonight Khoklov.”

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpg

 

Marat of course attacks the ring heading straight for Sergei but the ex-champ is far too smart and is hoisted up and out of reach on a wire where he taunts the Russian Bear.

 

“Yes I see you are big and strong but not so smart are you? I still have no idea why you want me so bad but want is not same as get. Let the match begin!”

 

C

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Jeffery McPeterson

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img109.imageshack.us/img109/8756/jefferymcpetersonalt1.jpg

 

In a match that had an average crowd reaction and some decent in-ring action, Marat Khoklov defeated Jeffery McPeterson in 10:15 by pinfall with a Moscow Lariat.

 

* Sergei spends the whole match watching from his aerial perch.

 

* Jeff does indeed go for weapons but his chain is wrenched from his hands and thrown away by the Russian Bear

 

* After the match Khoklov is escorted away by security before Sergei comes back down again looking worried

 

D

 

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http://img806.imageshack.us/img806/1165/phoebeplumridge.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img714/7719/peteybarnes.jpg

 

Phoebe Plumridge and her team TNG (Adam Matravers & Petey Barnes) enter the ring first:

 

Phoebe

“We, like, watched last week’s match with great interest to see who my boys would face at New Beginnings. The unpleasantness with Joey and Dragon has been totally unfortunate but now it’s time to concentrate on the REALLY important business...”

 

Adam

“Our tag titles. We’ll be succeeding in another successful defence in a few days’ time and in the meantime Pitbull has asked for a match.”

 

Petey

“We’re helpful guys so we wanted to do the man a favour. Tonight we’ll be facing Pitbull brown and his old friend JD Morgan.”

 

C-

 

TNG (Adam Matravers & Petey Barnes) vs. The Raised Fists (Pitbull Brown & JD Morgan)

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img714/7719/peteybarnes.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img810.imageshack.us/img810/1876/pitbullbrownalt2.jpghttp://img534.imageshack.us/img534/5908/jdmorgan2.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, TNG defeated The Raised Fists in 14:04 when Adam Matravers defeated JD Morgan by pinfall with a Tomorrow. TNG make defence number 17 of their HIW Tag Titles.

 

* JD is a big, tough guy but looked a little stunned by the speed of TNG’s modern style

 

* All four men looked dangerous with some great moves coming out

 

* But the experience of the champs showed with their ability to pull double-teams out of the air

 

C-

 

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http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

Joey Beauchamp addresses the crowd from the ring:

 

“No more. No more will I idly sit back and let every two-bit joker around here attack me. Victor Rodriguez get your ass down here and don’t even think about giving me some crap about how you can’t remember attacking me when I was vulnerable last week.”

 

http://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

Victor does appear but looks genuinely confused and perturbed at the sight of the furious champion. He tries to make sounds but nothing comes out…

 

“Oh Victor. I don’t even care what you’ve got to say. I’ve had it up to here with people taking advantage of me. UK Dragon, Adam Matravers and now you have all spun me lies and I’ve given up listening. It’s just another bunch of guys who are chancing it. Well you can’t beat me.

 

“I am cool. I am the breeze!”

 

B-

 

Joey Beauchamp vs. Victor Rodriguez

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Joey Beauchamp defeated Victor Rodriguez in 19:46 by pinfall with a Breeze Block.

 

* Victor seems bewildered all the way through and never really gets his strength and technical ability going

 

* Joey however is angry like never before. He’s clearly at wits’ end in the face of his troubles. Joey Beauchamp is NOT used to feeling like a target

 

C

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

After the match Joey stands strong but seizes his belt ready to clobber anyone who wants to attack him.

 

No-one immediately storms the ring for a change but a giant face does appear on the big screen daubed in face paint and wearing an old-fashioned hat and a bone through his nose…

 

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The stranger speaks in a very deep Caribbean accent with a hint of French.

 

“Joey. Poor, poor Joey. Did you really think you were just up against common little fighters trying to beat you down? How little you know of the real world.

 

“These men were all weak-minded fools. When they attacked you their minds were blank. They spoke the truth when they claimed the remembered nothing. All along I was controlling them and forcing them to weaken you.

 

“No-one is after your belt little Joey. I am after much more than that. I am after your soul. Now you are little more than a shell of the man you were I will be coming for you at New Beginnings.

 

“I am the man who will end you. I am PAPA SHANGO!!!”

 

C

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Overall rating: C

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Well that was a relief to get out!

 

Of course it clearly wasn’t a series of random attacks on joey after all and the rubbish protestations of innocence were kind of true. Papa Shango was all along using some freaky voodoo powers to control HIW’s finest against their will. The fiend.

 

Hope it wasn’t too heavy-handed as there will probably be quite a bit of this yet to come…

 

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Predictions:

 

Zergon 3/4

Good work. A slight wrong turn in the tag match. Adam and Petey will be very much involved with the tag division whilst they’re still on their massive win streak.

 

MJStark 4/4

Great work sir. Please feel free to ask for anything you’d like from the HIW catalogue.

 

1PWfan 2/4

I originally wanted to have the ME be abandoned after papa Shango got involved but abandoned that plan. Sorry of the non-title screwed things up.

 

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The card for New Beginnings will be up over the next day or two. I’m sure everyone could probably name the 5 matches already.

 

Thanks everyone for reading, commenting and predicting. It’s great to get points of view and help.

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MJ didn't predict I think it's me instead who got the 4/4 :) Another great show.

 

If it is, I'll have a DVD I think. Called "The 50 Greatest Fearsome Bunsen Introductions" :D

 

Sorry! I was updating a scrap of paper on my desk and... clearly Im an idiot. Congrats on understanding my severely limited booking direction.

 

Dr Bunsen's (very questionable) DVD will be with you ASAP

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MJ didn't predict I think it's me instead who got the 4/4 :) Another great show.

 

If it is, I'll have a DVD I think. Called "The 50 Greatest Fearsome Bunsen Introductions" :D

 

Slightly changed the name. Hope you dont mind...

 

http://img717.imageshack.us/img717/8057/bunsentop50dvd.jpg

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Next time from HIW:

 

New Beginnings

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/3163/hiwnewbeginnings.jpg

 

Our first PPV of the year sees some new faces go up against some established HIW Stars. Could this be a changing of the guard or will the stalwarts be victorious? All 3 live titles will be on the line with the potential for a new UK champion. the show will be coming to you from London town this Friday.

 

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Joey Beauchamp © vs. Papa Shango for the HIW UK Title

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpg

 

Papa Shango only revealed himself a matter of days ago. Before then Joey Beauchamp was being continually attacked by various men who claimed no knowledge of said attacks. Does Shango really have voodoo powers? if so what else can he do? Joey is no angel but he's certainly never possessed anyone before. Can he hold on to the title?

 

TNG (Adam Matravers & Petey Barnes) vs. Double Dutch (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) for the HIW Tag Titles

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img714/7719/peteybarnes.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpg

 

Double Dutch defeated Youth Explosion (as well as Merle O'Curle and Walter Morgan) for the right to challenge for these belts. TNG have now defended their belts XXX times and seem very confident as champions but the Dutch are career underdogs. If anyone can overcome a challenge like this they can.

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. UK Dragon

 

http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpg

 

Sewer Croc has made a splash in his first month in HIW beating some names and making a nuisance of himself. He has claimed he is the greatest masked wrestler in the UK and spat on the body of living hero UK Dragon. The Dragon has put lots of bad guys in their place before but never faced anyone raised by giant reptiles in the sewers before. is this the moment he loses his aura of invincibility?

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

The Russian Bear is another man who has made a dramatic start to his career in HIW and is undefeated so far. Sergei claims he doesn't know why Marat is after him but may not be telling the truth. Marat certainly seems physically unstoppable but Sergei is known for his wiliness. He will have a cunning plan to overcome the sheer power he's facing - the only question is: can it be enough?

 

Jay Zero vs. Red Dragon for the HIW Velocity Title

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

The Wave of Violence are trying to destroy what they can of HIW and certainly Red Dragon is part of the foundation of the company. If Jay (and Anarchy) can beat him and embarrass him they'll have to be taken seriously. If Red Dragon can reclaim the belt he will finally have to be treated like a contender after all these years.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

As always the best predictor will win their choice of HIW merchandise.

 

QUICK PICKS:

 

Joey Beauchamp © vs. Papa Shango

 

TNG © vs. Double Dutch

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. UK Dragon

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon

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Joey Beauchamp © vs. Papa Shango

Joey has quite many succesful title defenses at this point so I go with a title change here, probably via somekind of cheating involved.

 

TNG © vs. Double Dutch

Double Dutch just had the titles so I doubt they are getting those back.

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. UK Dragon

Dragon will likely challenger Shango soon since he was one of those guys that Shango used to weaken Joey.

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

I see DQ or count out win happening here.

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon

Same thing than tag titles match, Dragon is former champ so it isn´t all that likely for him to get the title back.

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And to bring a little more understanding to these random names…

 

Here’s Anarchy:

 

http://img829.imageshack.us/img829/1227/anarchy.png

 

No wonder we give him mic time eh?

 

 

And here’s Sewer Croc:

 

http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/4826/sewercroc.png

 

I should post his pop. He’s HUGE in London

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New Beginnings

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/3163/hiwnewbeginnings.jpg

 

Friday week 4 January 2006

Kent Racecourse

Attendance: 5,000

 

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http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

The Fearsome Bunsen introduces tonight’s show at the Kent Racecourse. Contrary to how that sounds the space is actually inside a state-of-the-90s palace of big windows, white paint and brushed steel.

 

“In geology sometimes you find a certain rock stranded far away from other similar ones and it isn’t immediately obvious how it got there. It’s called an erratic.

 

“Papa Shango seems similar to me. He’s certainly not like anybody else in HIW and I don’t really know how he got here. Regardless – the match is set tonight.

 

“Elsewhere Double Dutch are getting a chance to end TNG’s streak of wins at 17, Sewer Crocodile is facing his biggest match so far in the shape of The UK Dragon and Marat Khoklov is getting the chance to go one-on-one with the Fresh Prince of Belarus Sergei Kalashnov. Add in Jay Zero’s defence of his Velocity title and we’ve got one of the biggest nights we’ve ever seen in HIW.”

 

C

 

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http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpghttp://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

UK Dragon and Sewer Croc both clamber into the ring eyeing each other warily.

 

Dragon

“You’re new here so I’m giving you some leeway but you need to understand; if you think you’re tough enough to take me on then tell me. Put your name in the pot and I’ll get around to you. Don’t be attacking people. Don’t disrespect me and my mask.

 

Sewer Croc

“Not good enough. In your nice little middle-class world people queue properly and say pretty please. I’m not like that. I learned my manners from crocodiles and they don’t like to share.

 

“Down in the sewers you see what you want and you go get it. And I want what you have. Respect. Money. Success. Proper plumbing.

 

“You may have deserved that in the past but I see just another old, broken-down has-been. I’ve got the strength of a million reptilians. A flock of crocs.

 

“It’s over Dragon. See you in a while…”

 

C

 

UK Dragon vs. Sewer Croc

 

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

In a bout that had great heat and great wrestling action, Sewer Crocodile defeated UK Dragon in 14:51 by pinfall by using underhanded tactics.

 

* This is a hard-hitting affair as both men sacrifice technique for aggression.

 

* UK Dragon spends the match looking strong but Croc’s dirty moves start to take their toll.

 

* And the match is finished when Sewer Croc pretends injury only to poke UK Dragon in his worried eye. Nasty.

 

C+

 

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http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpg

 

Anarchy accompanies Jay Zero to the ring before his Velocity title match against Red Dragon.

 

“This match is a joke. When was the last time the Welsh won anything serious? Basically their history is a long list of failures, capitulations and collapses.

 

“I’m convinced that even when I’ve torn down the government and anarchy reigns free people in the region will be downtrodden peasants of the new order.

 

"No one seriously believes that Dragon stands a chance tonight but I’m being honest. You have my word that I won’t interfere in the match.”

 

C

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Jay Zero defeated Red Dragon in 9:35 by pinfall following interference from Fan Violence. Jay Zero makes defence number 4 of his HIW Velocity title.

 

* Anarchy doesn’t get involved. But two men in football shirts do.

 

http://img225.imageshack.us/img225/962/daveyceltic2.jpghttp://img64.imageshack.us/img64/3222/daveylondonjhd.jpg

 

* Red Dragon was doing well before but he can’t face 3-on-1 odds.

 

* Jay pins the prone Dragon and he Anarchy and the two footy fans all laugh.

 

D+

 

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http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

Sergei Kalashnov addresses the crowd:

 

“You’ve all seen that this crazy Russian is out of control. Yes he’s somehow achieved the challenge I set for him but no one really expects me to fight him do they?"

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

The fearsome Bunsen appears

“They absolutely do Sergei. I’ve told you I’m taking a firm grip on this company. A deal’s a deal and you’ll be fighting tonight"

 

“But he isn’t human! Everyone knows this man is maniac. My lawyer says…”

 

“Save your breath Sergei. I think you’ll need it.”

 

C+

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Sergei Kalashnov defeated Marat Khoklov in 9:55 by disqualification.

 

* Marat is as dominant as ever. In some ways more so as he finally got his hands on his target.

 

* Sergei spends the match trying to get close enough to go for pressure-points…

 

* ….but it’s no help as Khoklov eventually grabs him and repeatedly bounces Kalashnov’s head off the canvas leading to the DQ .

 

C-

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

After the match Marat shows no signs of letting up as he pounds the smaller man until a sizeable portion of the roster emerge and drag Khoklov away roaring.

 

C-

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img806.imageshack.us/img806/1165/phoebeplumridge.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img714/7719/peteybarnes.jpg

 

Phoebe Plumridge appears with TNG (Adam Matravers & Petey Barnes)

 

“Like seriously? Did anyone watch that utter snorefest the other day when Double Dutch got their shot? If we’ve only got to face teams like them and Youth Explosion we might as well leave these belts at home. Theres no way they’re going anywhere soon.”

 

Of course the Dutch boys come out at this to respond:

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpg

 

Ruud

“You should not be sho ashamed you know Phoebe. Where we come from there ish no shame in having a relationship with two men at the shame time."

 

Frank

“All this talk about 'your boysh' and 'how long'. It’sh obvioush that you’re trying to hide something.”

 

Maybe you need shome time off to gather your thoughtsh? I’d recommend shpending quality time with a couple of young men who like you very much. Maybe shome wrestlersh who recently losht their titlesh?”

 

C

 

TNG © [Adam Matravers & Petey Barnes] vs. Double Dutch [Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain]

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img714/7719/peteybarnes.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Double Dutch defeated TNG in 16:08 when Frank De Pain defeated Adam Matravers by pinfall with an Orange Wave. Double Dutch win the HIW Tag Titles.

 

* TNG went into this far too confident and seemed to think they already had the match won.

 

* Ruud and Frank showed their normal speed and agility but allied to high work-rate

 

* Phoebe didn’t get involved to help. She seemed a little disconcerted…

 

C+

 

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

Joey Beauchamp enters the ring first. The champ looks insulted. Affronted even.

 

“This is some kind of joke isn’t it? You want my soul? What are you a freak? A joke? Religious?

 

“You may have paid a few guys to attack me and they may even be going along with it but Im not fooled for a heartbeat.

 

“I’m the coolest fighter in England. I’m the Breeze for @#&!’S sake! I’m not scared of some bogeyman in a top hat.

 

“You’ve had your 15 minutes and now after I beat you here in this ring I expect you to disappear again.”

 

http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpg

 

Papa Shango makes his own candlelit entrance at that point to a ska song that’s almost hypnotic. Everyone in the race course is a bit entranced as they get their first look at the big, spooky Haitian. He’s well over 6-feet tall and the paint smeared on him makes him look like a skeleton crossed with an extra from Mad Max 2.

 

He doesn’t say anything – just stares in silence at Joey until the bell rings.

 

C

 

Joey Beauchamp © vs. Papa Shango

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpg

 

In a bout that had great heat and good action, Papa Shango defeated Joey Beauchamp in 19:48 by pinfall. Papa Shango wins the High Impact UK Championship title.

 

* Joey used all of his daring and flair and his attacks certainly had a big effect on Shango.

 

* Unfortunately after 15 minutes Papa Shango produced what appeared to be small doll. Something about that caused Joey to falter and the champ was suddenly far less mobile.

 

* Shango finished the match with a huge elbow coming back off the ropes. Joey didn’t see it coming and went down hard.

 

B

 

http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpg

 

After the match Papa Shango performs a ritual in the ring. It involves drawing some sort of marking with a pocket of powder, lighting a candle and (bizarrely) an egg.

 

D+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Overall show rating: C+

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First PPV of the year done!

 

And quite frankly I thought it was a success.

 

Papa Shango (or Haitian Voodude as you may know him) has gotten over nicely and becomes just the 8th UK champion in our 9 years of existence.

 

Double Dutch surprised an overconfident TNG by winning the tag belts back. I'd like a more wide open tag division and TNG were getting a little big for their boots.

 

And UK Dragon lost! It doesnt happen often (as I love him) but I felt it was necessary for storyline reasons.

 

And of course Sergei got the win but would have traded that for avoiding a beating. Can he find a way to bring Marat down?

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Predictions:

 

Zergon 3/5

 

20Legend 2/5

 

MichiganHero 5/5

Wow - what a way to come back. Please select any merch youd like from our little company...

 

Thanks for predicting everyone. Its great to have feedback. I hadnt really considered that UK Dragon might be annoyed with Papa Shango but of course you're right. Hed be hugely offended. Ill be working that into February.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Next month's PPV is Do or Die. We'll have at least one loser-leaves-HIW match.

 

Thanks for reading everyone (and for the nomination 20L)

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First PPV of the year done!

 

And quite frankly I thought it was a success.

 

Papa Shango (or Haitian Voodude as you may know him) has gotten over nicely and becomes just the 8th UK champion in our 9 years of existence.

 

Double Dutch surprised an overconfident TNG by winning the tag belts back. I'd like a more wide open tag division and TNG were getting a little big for their boots.

 

And UK Dragon lost! It doesnt happen often (as I love him) but I felt it was necessary for storyline reasons.

 

And of course Sergei got the win but would have traded that for avoiding a beating. Can he find a way to bring Marat down?

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Predictions:

 

Zergon 3/5

 

20Legend 2/5

 

MichiganHero 5/5

Wow - what a way to come back. Please select any merch youd like from our little company...

 

Thanks for predicting everyone. Its great to have feedback. I hadnt really considered that UK Dragon might be annoyed with Papa Shango but of course you're right. Hed be hugely offended. Ill be working that into February.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Next month's PPV is Do or Die. We'll have at least one loser-leaves-HIW match.

 

Thanks for reading everyone (and for the nomination 20L)

 

As much as that 5/5 looks nice, I only actually got 4/5 :p

 

And can I get a Double Dutch designed plate set?

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And can I get a Double Dutch designed plate set?

 

Of course you can sir. Id hang these on my wall.

 

http://img191.imageshack.us/img191/3300/ruudplate1.jpghttp://img196.imageshack.us/img196/7729/frankplate1.jpg

 

Preview for next week's HIW TV will go up tomorrow...

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Of course you can sir. Id hang these on my wall.

 

http://img191.imageshack.us/img191/3300/ruudplate1.jpghttp://img196.imageshack.us/img196/7729/frankplate1.jpg

 

Preview for next week's HIW TV will go up tomorrow...

 

Finally! I can stab Double Dutch ¬_¬

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Coming next time on HIW TV…

 

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpg

 

February starts with new champions holding two of our three active belts.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Jay Zero vs. Joey Beauchamp

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

Joey is without gold for the first time in a long time. Papa Shango has promised it wasn’t about the belt and either way Joey will fancy his chances again. Can he win against a fighter with a proven history if cheating and his stablemates?

 

Adam Matravers vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

Sergei secured a win over Marat Khoklov at New Beginnings. Albeit via disqualification when Marat crossed the line of acceptability. Can the ex-champ get some respectability back or was that the beginning of a slide? Adam lost his tag belt last week but will feel confident fighting Sergei at his low point.

 

Double Dutch © [Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain] vs. ???

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img845.imageshack.us/img845/2489/mystery5.jpghttp://img600.imageshack.us/img600/9117/mystery3.jpg

 

The Dutch boys are celebrating a double over the last week as they’ve regained the HIW Tag titles as well as releasing their own limited edition commemorative plate sets. Prof. Bunsen will have lined up a challenge for them but no doubt TNG will be looking for a rematch ASAP.

 

Blake Belushi vs. Red Dragon

 

http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/6572/blakebelushi.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

Red Dragon fell foul of Anarchy, Jay Zero and their new hooligan meatheads last week. Clearly they’re worried about the revolutionary Welshman. Can he regather his strength against the tough Australian?

 

Absolutely Flawless [Kelly & Lance Martin] vs. Youth Explosion [Leigh Burton & Ricky Storm]

 

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/3198/lancemartin2.jpghttp://img15.imageshack.us/img15/8625/kellymartin2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img9.imageshack.us/img9/3493/leighburton.jpghttp://img27.imageshack.us/img27/1640/rickystorm.jpg

 

Ricky and Leigh are still firmly in the mix for the tag titles but the Kelly twins are no pushovers. Can Y.E show that they deserve their status?

 

All this and more on next week’s HIW TV

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

As always the best predictor will win their choice of HIW merchandise

 

QUICK PICKS

Jay Zero vs. Joey Beauchamp

Adam Matravers vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Double Dutch © [Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain] vs. ???

Blake Belushi vs. Red Dragon

Absolutely Flawless vs. Youth Explosion

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Jay Zero vs. Joey Beauchamp

Joey is the main eventer here so he gets the win too.

 

Adam Matravers vs. Sergei Kalashnov

I believe that Kalashnov is higher on the ladders.

 

Double Dutch © [Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain] vs. ???

Is one of those mystery guys Sharky? Either way it might be a hard fight but Double Dutch aren´t going to lose the titles this early.

 

Blake Belushi vs. Red Dragon

Has Blake done anything since Stantz left? Actually forget that, has Blake done anything in HIW at all?

 

Absolutely Flawless vs. Youth Explosion

Knowing how much you like Youth Explosion I don´t see them losing this one.

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Has Blake done anything since Stantz left? Actually forget that, has Blake done anything in HIW at all?

 

No Blake hasnt done much. When Rick Stantz was still here they put up really good grades but Rick refused to resign after I told him off for being a tool a couple of times. Im not sure I would have kept him anyway.

 

Blake is really talented though. if he was smaller he'd probably be involved with the Velocity title. Maybe he needs a new partner...

 

Show going up tonight if anybody else wants a shot at winning tat

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HIW TV

 

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpg

 

Wednesday week 1 February 2006

Edgware Hall, London.

Attendance, 2,000

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

Professor Bunsen introduces tonight’s show in the ring

 

“Welcome back to a new month of activity in the UK’s finest wrestling promotion everyone.

 

“When we last saw you Papa Shango was winning his first ever UK title from Joey Beauchamp and I’m sure I wasn’t the only one worried about some of the questions that were raised.

 

“I’m a man of science and I don’t like to admit things exist that can’t be explained. Papa Shango certainly appears to be doing things other people can’t though. Rest assured I will be doing all I can to find out what’s going on.

 

“In the meantime we have plenty else going on and tonight Double Dutch will be making the very first defence of their tag titles against a pair of faces that will be familiar to HIW fans. Beast is one of the biggest and strongest men in Britain today and he’ll be teaming with ex 3-time HIW UK champion Sharky George.”

 

C

 

Double Dutch (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) vs. Beast & Sharky George

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img155.imageshack.us/img155/7109/beastbantomalt.jpghttp://img690.imageshack.us/img690/6013/sharkygeorge.jpg

 

In a bout that had solid in-ring action and average heat, Double Dutch defeated Beast Bantom and Sharky George in 9:53 when Frank De Pain defeated Sharky George by pinfall with an Orange Wave. Double Dutch make defence number 1 of their HIW Tag titles.

 

* Beast didn’t accomplish much as he chased speedy shadows.

 

* However Sharky managed to look pretty dominant picking on Ruud…

 

* …before a hot tag brought a red-hot Frank into the ring who promptly hit a huge dropkick on Sharky which knocked him out cold.

 

C-

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

The Fearsome Bunsen interviews Red Dragon in the ring:

 

Bunsen

“After your match with Jay Zero at New Beginnings you were assaulted 4-on-1. How do you feel about that?”

 

Dragon

“Yaki da Prof. I feel less cowed than ever. If those ffliaid have to resort to their gang then I know I’ve got Jay worried. They’re fighting for nothing. I’m fighting for a whole, proud country of tradition, choirs and valleys. They can bring all the English hooligans they want and I’ll keep coming until I win that belt.”

 

“It’s that desire that’s kept you in HIW all these years. Do you feel like you can win a match against Blake Belushi tonight even given the difference in your styles?”

 

“Belushi may be a lot bigger than me but I’ve never relied on power to win. I’m the Flea from Pontypridd. He won’t be able to catch me boyo.”

 

D+

 

Blake Belushi vs. Red Dragon

 

http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/8214/blakebelushialt1jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

In a bout that had solid in-ring action and average heat, Red Dragon defeated Blake Belushi in 8:09 by pinfall. During the match we also saw Jay Zero distract Red Dragon, and Anarchy also distract Red Dragon.

 

* As Red Dragon predicted he used his speed to keep clear of Belushi. The big Australian got some offence in but couldn’t pin the Welshman down enough to really use his big moves.

 

* Jay Zero and Anarchy came to ringside but didn’t do anything.

 

* The finish came as Blake tired – allowing Red Dragon to hit a perfect Hurricanrana.

 

D+

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img64.imageshack.us/img64/3222/daveylondonjhd.jpghttp://img225.imageshack.us/img225/962/daveyceltic2.jpg

 

As soon as the match finishes Anarchy and Jay Zero launch their assault on Red Dragon and are again supported by the football hooligans giving them a 4-on-advantage again…

 

http://img810.imageshack.us/img810/1876/pitbullbrownalt2.jpg

 

Until Pitbull Brown storms the ring and clears house with his own unexpected counter-attack. The Wave of Violence scatter and Pitbull helps Red Dragon up.

 

D+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img191.imageshack.us/img191/3743/bethanyhurstalt2.jpghttp://img9.imageshack.us/img9/3493/leighburton.jpghttp://img27.imageshack.us/img27/1640/rickystorm.jpg

 

Bethany Hurst and Youth Explosion (Leigh Burton & Ricky Storm) are seen on the big screen.

 

Bethany

“What a joke. Double Dutch of all people with the tag belts around their waists. We should have been in the title match at New Beginnings. The only reason we weren’t is because Leigh and Ricky were busy standing up to Merle O’Curle and Walter Morgan rather than hanging around like cowards waiting for an opportunity.

 

“Still. I think the little perverts might be convinced to give us a match.”

 

The camera pans out and it turns out Bethany, Leigh and Ricky are in Double Dutch’s changing room. Leigh and Ricky both grab a large stack of what appear to be magazines and all three of them scarper.”

 

D+

 

Absolutely Flawless (Kelly & Lance Martin) vs. Youth Explosion (Leigh Burton & Ricky Storm)

 

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/3198/lancemartin2.jpghttp://img15.imageshack.us/img15/8625/kellymartin2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img9.imageshack.us/img9/3493/leighburton.jpghttp://img27.imageshack.us/img27/1640/rickystorm.jpg

 

In a match that had an average crowd reaction and some decent in-ring action, Youth Explosion defeated Absolutely Flawless in 5:46 when Leigh Burton defeated Lance Martin by pinfall with an Evolution Catapult.

 

* The Kelly twins do pretty well here and seem like real threats.

 

* But they’re distracted by Bethany leafing through some of the stolen magazines.

 

* Enabling Leigh and Ricky to hit their double-team move – the Evolution Catapult.

 

D+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpg

 

Also backstage the camera appears to be following a snarling Marat Khoklov.

 

The giant Russian Bear storms through the corridors trailing what appears to be a trail of potatoes left on the floor.

 

Khoklov follows the trail into a dressing room when suddenly the door slams shut on him and a chair is thrust underneath the handle trapping him inside.

 

The door quivers as Marat tries to break back out.

 

C+

 

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

Sergei Kalashnov is in the ring with a mic:

 

“Old Belarusian potato trick is good yes? Guaranteed to work on our dim Russian friends every time.

 

“Marat may be big, strong and ugly but I have something he does not. Very smart brain. Now I am free to fight challenger in peace with no fear of attack.”

 

C+

 

Adam Matravers vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Sergei Kalashnov defeated Adam Matravers in 10:21 by pinfall with an Eastern Block.

 

* This is pretty even with both men looking strong.

 

* Sergei does still seem worried about an attack from Marat but mostly back to his strongest

 

* The finish is legitimate when Sergei manages to hit a huge Eastern Block on a surprised Adam

 

C+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

Joey Beauchamp enters the ring before his match

 

“I think I speak for every man and woman here when I say that Papa Shango should never have been allowed to take my title last week at New Beginnings. I don’t know how he did it but that freak in the hat did something weird to me. I wasn’t myself when he beat me.

 

“If someone can beat me then I’ll take it like a man but my horde of fans can’t bear to see me lose a match through some sort of freaky trick. Papa Shango: get out here!”

 

There is no response. Papa Shango remains resolutely not here.

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

Prof. Bunsen however does appear.

 

“Joey – for once I’m on your side here. I don’t want any kind of supernatural skulduggery in HIW any more than you. I think Shango is up to some clever smoke and mirrors but even so something isn’t right. As soon as we can find him I’ll get to the bottom of it. But until then I’ve got another opponent lined up: Jay Zero.”

 

C-

 

Jay Zero vs. Joey Beauchamp

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

In a bout that had a good crowd and good action, Joey Beauchamp defeated Jay Zero in 15:07 by pinfall with a Breeze Block. During the match we also saw Papa Shango distract Joey Beauchamp, and Anarchy also accidentally hit Jay Zero.

 

* Joey looks good but so does Jay. Both men are fast, tough and daring.

 

* Papa Shango does appear in his now trademark top hat and its enough to entrance both men in the ring.

 

* When Shango leaves Jay’s partner Anarchy chooses to swing a chair at Joey. Unfortunately Joey reacts too quickly and Jay Zero is smacked in the face instead allowing Joey to take the pin.

 

C+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Overall show rating : C

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Pretty good results in the ME and semi here. Im pretty happy now that weve raised the floor of expectations in the UK to the point where weve got more than 3-4 viable stars. We've been trying to get there for a long time!

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Results:

 

Zergon 5/5

20Legend 5/5

 

Not too tricky this week with some clear favourites.

 

Zergon - you win on the countback system (20Legend has won more recently than you with the Bunsen 50 greatest intros DVD). Feel free to select any item you'd like

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Thanks for reading everyone, for predicting/commenting and for the votes in the DotM awards.

 

It really is a great added bonus that anyone is enjoying my low-fi take on the c-verse at all.

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Next time on HIW TV…

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Joey Beauchamp & UK Dragon vs. Jeffrey McPeterson & Geordie Jimmy Morris

 

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpghttp://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img109.imageshack.us/img109/8756/jefferymcpetersonalt1.jpghttp://img69.imageshack.us/img69/8616/geordiejimmymorris2.jpg

 

Joey and Dragon teaming together? The two have an uneasy truce at the moment with papa Shango as the common enemy but can they team together?

Obviously their opponents aren’t blazing a trail of success at the moment but something fishy is afoot. And that means Voodoo…

 

JD Morgan vs. Sewer Crocodile

 

http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/5908/jdmorgan2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

This is JD’s first HIW match as a solo competitor and the lone wolf will want to start with a bang. Sewer Croc is dangerous but he’ll also agree lazy. Can his arrogance help against one of the most dangerous men in Britain?

 

Double Dutch (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) © vs. Victor Hugo (Victor Rodriguez & Hugo Lopes) for the HIW tag titles

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpghttp://img6.imageshack.us/img6/7886/hugolopes.jpg

 

Victor Hugo haven’t teamed together for a while but they’re still 2-time tag champions. Now TNG have been brought back to Earth with a bump loads of teams think they can win the belts. Will TNG and/or Youth Explosion take exception?

 

TNG (Adam Matravers & Petey Barnes) vs. The Hooligans (Davey Celtic & Davey London)

 

http://a.imageshack.us/img96/9586/adammatravers.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img714/7719/peteybarnes.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img64.imageshack.us/img64/3222/daveylondonjhd.jpghttp://img225.imageshack.us/img225/962/daveyceltic2.jpg

 

TNG haven’t had a match since losing to Double Dutch last month. The Hooligans haven’t had a match yet but they’ve been associating with Anarchy and Jay Zero – the kings of stacking the odds.

TNG need to won to show they’re still top contenders. But if The Hooligans can win this they’ll instantly be a major threat.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

As always the best predictor will win merchandise of their choice.

 

QUICK PICKS

Joey Beauchamp & UK Dragon vs. Jeffrey McPeterson & Geordie Jimmy Morris

JD Morgan vs. Sewer Crocodile

Double Dutch © vs. Victor Hugo

TNG vs. The Hooligans

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