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The Fearsome Bunsen in the UK - HIW


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Next time on HIW TV…

 

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UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

 

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The Dragon is still up to the hilt in his squabble with Papa Shango but with the spiritual power of Ali Bloxsome in the mix things might not be going all Shango’s way anymore. Will they be involved here? Will Zombie Joey Beauchamp make an appearance?

 

Facing Dragon is ex-champ Victor who has taken umbrage at his partner Hugo’s weak performances lately. That’s notwithstanding Victor’s anger at Sewer Crocodile spitting on Hugo though. With those two motivations it seems Victor might well be making another charge at a singles career.

 

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Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://img219.imageshack.us/img219/1359/peteybarneshiw.jpghttp://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

TNG have fallen away a little in the tag ranks as Youth Explosion appear to have a hold over Double Dutch. Petey is still a good fighter through and poses a stiff test for anyone even without backup.

 

Sergei on the other hand is watching his back with Marat Khoklov stalking him once again. The two men are a dubious 1-1 in recent matches and have a serious personal grudge with each other. Can Sergei somehow conjure up a winning position?

 

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Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

 

http://img810.imageshack.us/img810/1876/pitbullbrownalt2.jpghttp://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

Pitbull and red Dragon have been staunch allies against the Wave of Violence recently as the Welsh Warrior tries to win the velocity title from Jay Zero.

The two men will be fighting for the right to challenge for the Velocity Title at Scorch Comfort. Will it remain friendly or will each man drop his principles for the chance at gold?

 

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Northern Uproar (Geordie Jimmy Morris & Don Henderson) vs. Wave of Violence (Anarchy & Jay Zero)

 

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/8616/geordiejimmymorris2.jpghttp://img52.imageshack.us/img52/722/thdonhendersonalt1.jpghttp://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpghttp://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpg

 

The Wave attempt to continue on their path to total destruction by facing off against a veteran/rookie combination in their first proper match together.

 

Don and Jimmy could turn out to be a decent team. They’re a stretching/brawling team that could match up well against some of the high-fliers in the division. Jimmy in particular has been a big name in the past (winning the Undefeated title 3 years ago in HIW).

 

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Beach Warriors (Blake belushi & Mad Vance) vs. Youth Explosion (Leigh Burton & Ricky Storm)

 

http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/8214/blakebelushialt1jt.jpghttp://img34.imageshack.us/img34/1392/thvancesturt.jpghttp://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpghttp://img9.imageshack.us/img9/3493/leighburton.jpghttp://img27.imageshack.us/img27/1640/rickystorm.jpg

 

Youth Explosion are still lording it over Double Dutch with their ‘special interest’ magazine collection but haven’t managed to nab the titles yet.

 

Meanwhile Blake Belushi seems to be fighting hard but not winning with his new partner Mad Vance. These two are clearly talented and dedicated meaning it’s only a matter of time until they start picking up some big wins

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

QUICK PICKS

UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion

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UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

Dragon is the one in the title picture thus he´s also the one who gets the win.

 

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Kalashnov is more established as singles guy.

 

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

Personal preference

 

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence

WoV is more established team.

 

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion

Same here, I go with more established team.

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UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez - A UK Dragon win seems far more likely!!

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov - I call shenanigans.

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon - I can see this being a DQ win possibly, either that or a draw perhaps.

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence - They're crazy men and against a brand new team.

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion - in an attempt to drive surfboard sales, Belushi seals the win!

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HIW TV

 

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpg

 

Wednesday week 3 March 2006

Edgware hall, London.

Attendance: 2,000

 

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The Fearsome Bunsen introduces tonight’s show.

 

For some reason he launches into an exhaustive history of group 5 of the periodic table as an analogy for tag-wrestling and mentions that next month will see some brand new teams debut in HIW.

 

C

 

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Red Dragon appears with Pitbull Brown. The Welsh Warrior complains again about the Wave of Violence (Anarchy and Jay Zero with the Hooligans) and their outright cheating and bad behaviour.

 

Dragon reveals that after beating them in tag action they’ve been granted a Velocity title match and so Pitbull and he are fighting honourably for the right to challenge Jay at Scorch Comfort.

 

D+

 

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

 

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In a match that had some good action and average heat, Red Dragon defeated Pit Bull Brown in 7:33 by pinfall with a quick roll up.

The two allies shake hands before the match and all is conducted entirely above board. It’s a decent clash of aerial vs brawling but Red Dragon seems the most desperate to win and wins the match.

D+

 

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All four members of Wave of Violence storm the ring afterwards and attack Pitbull and Red Dragon. As they stick the boot in Anarchy grabs a mic and tells the crowd that Jay will defend the Velocity title but no one should expect him to lose it as the Wave will ‘take steps’ to make sure he keeps it.

C

 

Northern Uproar (Geordie Jimmy Morris & Don Henderson) vs. Wave of Violence (Anarchy & Jay Zero)

 

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/8616/geordiejimmymorris2.jpghttp://img52.imageshack.us/img52/722/thdonhendersonalt1.jpghttp://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpghttp://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpg

 

In a match that had an average crowd reaction and some decent in-ring action, Wave of Violence defeated Northern Uproar in 7:20 when Anarchy defeated Don Henderson by pinfall with a Cheap Trick after interference from the Hooligans.

 

The new team of Morris and Henderson actually look pretty good. They’re serious and committed fighters who won’t give an inch.

Unfortunately the Wave has a two-man advantage and the Hooligans attack Geordie Jimmy. Don is talented but outnumbered and is pinned shortly.

 

D+

 

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Bethany Hurst accompanies the Youth explosion boys and all three leaf through more of the stolen Double Dutch literature.

 

Bethany claims that they now hold all the aces as the Dutch look a bit tense and on edge.

 

Bethany demands a match at Scorch Comfort to prove superiority but tellingly the Dutch don’t even appear…

 

With that Bethany starts taking the mick out of other the teams on the roster and claiming none of them are good enough to even get close to the 4-time tag champs she manages when the talented but unproven team of the Beach Warriors (Blake Belushi & Mad Vance) appear for a match.

 

D+

 

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion

 

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In a match that had an average crowd reaction and some decent in-ring action, Youth Explosion defeated The Beach Warriors in 6:54 when Leigh Burton defeated Mad Vance by pinfall, illegally using the ropes for leverage. During the match we also had Bethany Hurst distract Belushi and Sturt.

 

Blake and Vance look great here and clearly have the talent to be big names in the tag division but they don’t have the advantages a manageress brings and the poor Aussies are entranced by Bethany’s short skirt allowing a sneaky pin.

 

C

 

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Sergei Kalashnov seizes a mic in the ring and introduces a video on the big screen. It’s a compilation of Marat Khoklov losing matches across several European promotions. The Russian Bear is as ripped and huge as ever but is shown tapping out to 3 separate men.

 

Sergei claims that he’s seen a weakness and knows how to exploit it and would like to propose a decider at Scorch Comfort to finally show he is the better man than the idiot, lying, retarded Russian terrorist.

 

C

 

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

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In a match that had some good action and average heat, Sergei Kalashnov defeated Petey Barnes in 11:32 by submission. During the match we also had Marat Khoklov distract Sergei.

 

This is a very solid match. Both men are athletes and the action swings back and forth before Marat Khoklov storms the ring to intimidate Sergei. He looks like he’ll attack but all the Bear does is tell Sergei (and the crowd) that he accepts the challenge.

 

Sergei seems shaken but somehow rallies and manages to get Petey to tap out whilst he stares directly into Marat’s steely eyes at ringside.

 

C

 

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UK Dragon & Ali Bloxsome are shown in a video on the screen. They appear to be in some sort of forest glade in moonlight wearing garlands of mistletoe and flowers.

 

Ali performs some kind of quick ceremony and lays a wreath of leaves on the Dragon’s head.

 

Back in the ring UK Dragon tells Papa Shango that he’s finally found an equaliser. Traditional British druidic magic can defeat Black Voodoo and next time they meet things will be different.

 

C

 

UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

 

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In a match that had some good action and average heat, UK Dragon defeated Victor Rodriguez in 15:29 by pinfall with a Dragon Drop following interference from Sewer Crocodile. During the match we also had Papa Shango distract UK Dragon.

 

This is a great match between two accomplished fighters and Victor looks back to his best almost taking the win several times against his much-fancied opponent.

 

Papa Shango enters the arena to his dimmed lights, candles and ska but doesn’t actually get involved in the match.

 

Whilst this is going on Sewer Crocodile also attacks and lays Victor out from behind before running away.

 

UK Dragon as an honourable man of course doesn’t take the easy win but helps Victor up and re-joins the fight before pinning the shaken Spaniard with a huge Dragon Drop. He then signals to his head where the garland of leaves went to papa Shango and the show ends with the two men staring at each other.

 

C+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Overall show rating: C-

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Sorry that show took so long. Crazy busy week at work.

 

We're basically set up for Scorch Comfort now. Im sure most of you could name the matches already.

 

Im pretty confused for the grade here though. The ME was a 66. The SME was a 62. The Y.E/ beach warriors match also hit 61. We had 4 angles in the 60s.

 

Just seems a bit harsh to ding the event to a 58.

 

Also - I put the TV logo in insteqad of the Vs bny misrtake but I thought it looked cool. Any opinions?

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

Dragon is the one in the title picture thus he´s also the one who gets the win.

 

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Kalashnov is more established as singles guy.

 

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

Personal preference

 

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence

WoV is more established team.

 

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion

Same here, I go with more established team.

 

Great reasoning as always. 5/5

 

UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion

 

4/5. I love the beach Warriors but they need time.

 

UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez - A UK Dragon win seems far more likely!!

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov - I call shenanigans.

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon - I can see this being a DQ win possibly, either that or a draw perhaps.

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence - They're crazy men and against a brand new team.

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion - in an attempt to drive surfboard sales, Belushi seals the win!

 

You made me laugh. 3/5. Marat did in fact shenaniganize Sergei but the Fresh prince toughed it out anyway

 

UK Dragon vs. Victor Rodriguez

Petey Barnes vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Pitbull Brown vs. Red Dragon

Northern Uproar vs. Wave of Violence

Beach Warriors vs. Youth Explosion

 

A very solid 4/5 but missed on Pitbull. tbh I do see him as a possible champ one day but Red Dragon is more fun for now as a driver in their relationship.

 

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Zergon wins this week's merchandise. Please select anything your fevered mind can conjure.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Thanks for reading and commenting everyone and also a big thanks/apologies to everyone whose artwork Ive butchered and misused. I really appreciate you not complaining!

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Nice show...but it needed more Sewer Croc!

 

Sorry sir. The Croc hasnt gone anywhere - we just need to reign in his ego (and huge London popularity)...

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Next time on HIW TV…

 

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpg

 

Ali Bloxsome vs. Joey Beauchamp

 

http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/7159/thalibloxsomejhd.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

The Demolition Druid Ali Bloxsome appears to have given UK Dragon some kind of protection against papa Shango’s powers but clearly Shango’s allies (slaves?) aren’t going to be happy with that. Shango and Joey certainly aren’t weaklings anyway so things are far from settled.

 

Anarchy vs. Sewer Crocodile

 

http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

Anarchy knows that his ally Jay Zero will be defending his Velocity title against red Dragon at Scorch Comfort but Anarchy won’t have a match himself. Knowing his regard for rules he’ll have something cooked up anyway…

Meanwhile Sewer Croc has been a royal pain in the bum for almost everyone on the roster but Victor Rodriguez appears to be standing up to the masked reptilian. Will the Gypsy Prince make an appearance here?

 

Pitbull Brown vs. Victor Rodriguez

 

http://img810.imageshack.us/img810/1876/pitbullbrownalt2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

Pitbull lost out to his friend Red Dragon for the right to challenge Jay Zero but his troubles are far from over with the Wave of Violence.

Victor (as stated earlier) is gunning for Sewer Croc due to the lack of respect shown to Hugo Lopes. In days gone by Hugo would definitely have appeared but the Portuguese seems less committed to Victor than previously

 

Marat Khoklov vs Mr Evilness

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img685.imageshack.us/img685/6021/mrevilnesshiw.jpg

 

Marat will be facing Sergei Kalashnov again at Scorch Comfort as both men seek to finally prove their point over the other man. The Russian Bear is imposing and dangerous but Mr Evilness is one of world wrestling’s true wild cards.

 

Will Sergei be content to let Marat gain momentum for the match? Will events conspire against one of these men?

 

Double Dutch (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) vs The Twinklettes (Stardust & Thunderbolt)

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img853.imageshack.us/img853/6748/stardust.jpghttp://img15.imageshack.us/img15/2388/thunderboltw.jpg

 

The Dutchmen are listless and tired-looking at the moment without their recreational literature. Youth Explosion are gunning for the titles and will exploit every advantage they can get. Having said that - the Dutch are champions and will be confident going up against two rookies.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

As always the best predictor will win their choice of HIW merchandise.

 

Thanks for reading and commenting everyone. It’s great to see people taking an interest in my little promotion

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

QUICK PICKS

Ali Bloxsome vs. Joey Beauchamp

Anarchy vs. Sewer Crocodile

Pitbull Brown vs. Victor Rodriguez

Marat Khoklov vs Mr Evilness

Double Dutch vs The Twinklettes

 

PS extra thanks to kamchatka for the Twinklettes masks that Ive butchered. Sorry!

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With Ali Bloxsome in main event this looks like a good spot to order some of his merchandise:cool:.

 

Ali Bloxsome vs. Joey Beauchamp

Joey is more established guy so I go with him.

 

Anarchy vs. Sewer Crocodile

Both got good pushes right now but Crocodile seems to be closer to the top.

 

Pitbull Brown vs. Victor Rodriguez

Pitbull has to be the favorite here but I actually go with Victor as he needs the win and this looks like a spot were he could get one and prove that he´s indeed a solid wrestler.

 

Marat Khoklov vs Mr Evilness

Khovlov won´t lose here.

 

Double Dutch vs The Twinklettes

Nice alts for two guys who I do like, but no matter how cool they look they still suck in-ring so Double D takes the win here.

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<p><strong>Ali Bloxsome</strong> vs. Joey Beauchamp</p><p>

<strong>Anarchy</strong> vs. Sewer Crocodile</p><p>

Pitbull Brown vs. <strong>Victor Rodriguez</strong></p><p>

<strong>Marat Khoklov</strong> vs Mr Evilness</p><p>

<strong>Double Dutch</strong> vs The Twinklettes</p>

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With Ali Bloxsome in main event this looks like a good spot to order some of his merchandise:cool:.

 

 

Im not sure Im happy with this at all. But what merch do you do for a Druid? Some free seeds? A hoody? In fact come to think of it - they sound much better.

 

Oh well. Next time someone asks for Ali stuff it will be great!

 

In the meantime heres a poster:

 

http://img560.imageshack.us/img560/6417/alibloxsomeposter2.jpg

 

Show going up tomorrow if anyone wants to predict. Looks like matches are splitting opinion so far :eek:

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Ali Bloxsome vs. Joey Beauchamp

I like Joey

Anarchy vs. Sewer Crocodile

I can't decide :p

Pitbull Brown vs. Victor Rodriguez

Singles star.

Marat Khoklov vs Mr Evilness

Marat takes another victim

Double Dutch vs The Twinklettes

The Twinklettes are cool, but DD are better :)

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HIW TV

 

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/1520/hiwtvlogo.jpg

 

Wednesday W4 March 2006

Edgware Hall, London: Attendance 2,000

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

The Fearsome Bunsen introduces tonight’s show on video from his office/lab. As usual it’s stacked up with test tubes, caged furry animals and what appears to be a cow.

 

He mostly highlights the forthcoming Scorch Comfort PPV.

 

C+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpghttp://img810.imageshack.us/img810/1876/pitbullbrownalt2.jpg

 

Victor Rodriguez appears on video from a Tapas bar (For those interested it’s the Salt Yard on Goodge Street).

 

The Gypsy prince calls out Sewer Croc for being disrespectful to established HIW stars.

 

Victor also refers to Sewer Croc’s attack on him last week before challenging the Croc to a match at Scorch Comfort.

 

During the video Pitbull Brown comes out and has it stopped. The brawler tells the crowd that he hates all this BS and if Victor wants to prove himself he should get out right now.

 

Which he does.

 

D+

 

Pitbull Brown vs. Victor Rodriguez

 

http://img810.imageshack.us/img810/1876/pitbullbrownalt2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Victor Rodriguez defeated Pit Bull Brown in 7:42 by pinfall with a Madrid Maul. During the match we also had Anarchy run in and attack Pit Bull Brown.

 

C

 

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Double Dutch cut a promo from the ring. They look on-edge and dejected with bags under their eyes and nervous tics.

 

The young men complain again that without their ‘reading material’ they can’t concentrate. Therefore they are accepting the offer of a match.

 

It will be a multi-item ladder match with the tag titles as well as the stash of magazines suspended above the ring.

 

D+

 

Double Dutch (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) vs The Twinklettes (Stardust & Thunderbolt)

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img853.imageshack.us/img853/6748/stardust.jpghttp://img15.imageshack.us/img15/2388/thunderboltw.jpg

 

In a bout that had solid in-ring action but not much in the way of heat, Double Dutch defeated The Twinklettes in 6:27 when Frank De Pain defeated Thunderbolt by pinfall with an Orange Wave. During the match we also saw Leigh Burton distract Ruud Van Anger, and Ricky Storm also distract Frank De Pain.

 

D+

 

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The Russian bear Marat Khoklov appears. As always he’s massive, furious and terrifying.

 

The furred brawler angrily accepts Sergei’s offer of a 3rd match to finally settle things between them and guarantees he will win it.

 

C+

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Mr Evilness

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img685.imageshack.us/img685/6021/mrevilnesshiw.jpg

 

In an extremely short match, Marat Khoklov defeated Mr. Evilness in 4:37 by pinfall with a Moscow Lariat.

 

C-

 

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Anarchy & The Wave of Violence (Jay Zero and The Hooligans) all appear in the ring.

 

Anarchy reiterates his belief that everyone is doomed, civilisation is crumbling and come the revolution HIW fans will be first against the wall.

 

Anarchy hypes Jay Zero’s Velocity title match against Red Dragon at Scorch Comfort and claims that the Wave will hold all of the HIW titles before long.

 

C+

 

Anarchy vs. Sewer Crocodile

 

http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpg

 

In a bout that had great heat and great wrestling action, Sewer Crocodile defeated Anarchy in 10:08 by pinfall following botched interference by Davey London.

 

A cracking match that could have gone either way. Both men looked great but Anarchy being Anarchy he had to invite his support to get involved. Unfortunately the Hooligans made a massive mistake and took Anarchy out allowing Sewer Croc to sneak the win. Anarchy was NOT happy.

 

B-

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpghttp://img713.imageshack.us/img713/7159/thalibloxsomejhd.jpghttp://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpghttp://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

UK Dragon accompanies Ali Bloxsome to the ring ahead of the showdown. Both men wear flower garlands in their hair and Ali comes in in his full, flowing white druidic robes.

 

Before either man can speak Papa Shango’s ska booms out accompanied by his deep, unsettling laughter. Shango enters the ring accompanying Joey Beauchamp who still seems like an unthinking zombie.

 

Shango proceeds to laugh at Dragon and Bloxsome and again tell them his voodoo is far beyond their pathetic white magic. Shango also wants to accept Dragon’s own challenge for a match at Scorch Comfort. To ensure that all this silliness stops the match will be no-DQ and under submission rules. The match can only end with one man giving up any right to the title.

 

C

 

Ali Bloxsome vs. Joey Beauchamp

 

http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/7159/thalibloxsomejhd.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img3.imageshack.us/img3/8825/joeybeauchamp3.jpg

 

In a bout that had a good crowd and good action, Joey Beauchamp defeated Ali Bloxsome in 14:51 by pinfall with a Breeze Block. During the match we also had Papa Shango run in and attack Ali Bloxsome.

 

Papa Shango was frustrated that Joeys zombie strength didn’t appear to do much and eventually got involved himself. UK Dragon was conspicuous in his failure to save Ali but neither man seemed too disappointed as Joey took the win.

 

C

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Overall rating: C-

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And we're heading into Scorch Comfort on a roll...

 

...of rubbish 58-rated shows.

 

We're getting dinged due to low angles from non-MEers so we might have to make some changes there.

 

Regardless - Im confident of the PPV doing well.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Predictions:

 

Zergon 5/5

MJStark 3/5

20Legend 3/5

 

And its 2 in a row for Zergon. Congrats sir - and help yourself to anything you'd like.

 

Thanks everyone for reading, commenting, etc.

 

The card for Scorch Comfort is going up tomorrow.

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HIW presents:

 

http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/6853/hiwscorchcomfort.jpg

 

Scorch Comfort

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

 

http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpg

 

Papa’s voodoo appears to be slightly less potent than it has been with Ali Bloxsome having performed some Druid magic. UK Dragon seems to think he can realistically challenge the champion at least without being struck down with some mystical affliction.

 

However Joey Beauchamp is the wildcard here. Is he still on Shango’s side? Will he have a say in who wins the belt? Will he ever be the Breeze again?

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

 

http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

Sewer Croc has been on a bit of a rampage through HIW with some massive scalps already. However Victor is one of the wilier men in the company and has beaten people before where he was thought to have no chance.

 

Sewer Croc has rubbed so many people up the wrong way that interference is a distinct possibility. In particular Hugo (Victor’s partner) was spat on recently by Croc.

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

These two have been battling along with allies on both sides. Jay has had Anarchy and the Hooligans involved and Dragon has been helped by Pitbull Brown.

 

As a result Prof Bunsen has made a non-interference stipulation. If any allies enter the match Jay or Red Dragon will immediately forfeit this match.

With both sides desperately fighting alone for a cause this should see some high intensity

 

Double Dutch © (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) vs. Youth Explosion (Leigh Burton & Ricky Storm) for the HIW tag titles.

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img9.imageshack.us/img9/3493/leighburton.jpghttp://img27.imageshack.us/img27/1640/rickystorm.jpg

 

Double Dutch have been very successful champions but recently they have been way off their game after Youth Explosion stole their leisure press.

As a result this match is now a double ladder match.

 

The tag belts will be suspended above the ring with the magazines in question with two ladders available. The match will end with the recovery of either item. The remaining item will revert to the Fearsome Bunsen to do with as he chooses.

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

These two have clashed twice already this year with the score tied at 1-1. In reality though Marat has been far more impressive as the first match was a DQ against him.

 

Nonetheless Sergei has seemed very confident this month and speculation is rife that the Fresh Prince of Belarus has another sneaky trick up his sleeve.

 

Of course tricks are all very well but what can they do against the best part of 400 lbs. of pure muscle, fur and hatred?

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

As always the best predictor will win their choice of merchandise from the HIW sweatshop in Coventry. In case of a tie the person who has least recently won the competition will be the champ.

 

QUICK PICKS

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

 

Thanks to everyone for reading and commenting

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And its 2 in a row for Zergon. Congrats sir - and help yourself to anything you'd like.

 

Papa Shango needs some stuff on his own, he is the current champ after all.

 

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Dragon haven´t yet fully figured Shango out so I go with Papa retaining.

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Wait is this one vs. two or just Rodriquez vs. Crocodile? I assume it´s 1 vs. 1 in which case Crocodile will win as though Victor got a big win in last show he still isn´t on the same level.

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

If I remember right Dragon was the last champ so I doubt he gets the title back.

 

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

DD wins but gets the magazines instead of belts.

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

Not sure about this one but Marat doesn´t really need to win this one as he has his menace while Sergei could get a nice boost from winning.

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

Magazines of course everyone knows that´s more important than some tag titles:p

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QUICK PICKS

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

Bacon? If not, magazines!

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Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

The titles

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http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/6853/hiwscorchcomfort.jpg

 

Scorch Comfort

 

Friday week 4 March 2006

Kent Racecourse.

Attendance, 4,434

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

The Fearsome Bunsen introduces tonight’s show in a conflagration of fireworks and noise. There’s a lot more Scorch than Comfort.

 

“Ladies and Gentlemen – I’m proud to welcome you to HIW’s biggest ever show. Tonight we see no fewer than 3 titles on the line and as you can see we’ve spent more on this event than ever before.”

 

The set backs him up. It basically looks like someone’s bought a job lot of orange paint. Radioactive orange paint.

 

“Our main event tonight sees UK Dragon finally get the chance top go one-on-one with papa Shango. They’ve been at each other’s’ throats all year long and this is their first ever singles matchup.

 

“Elsewhere Sewer Crocodile will face the resurgent Victor Rodriguez. Victor has been idling for a while but looks back to his best. Sewer Croc is of course undefeated in HIW and will be hoping to capitalise on that if he wins tonight.

 

“I’m personally excited about our ground-breaking belts vs p0rn match where tag champs Double Dutch will be betting their titles that they can dominate 4-time champs Youth Explosion.

 

“But first off tonight we see another personal grudge match for the Velocity belt.

 

“Jay Zero and his friends have tried my patience with their antics and Red Dragon hasn’t been scared to crack a few heads either.

 

“As you know this is a no-DQ match. If anyone else enters the contest on behalf of the fighters the match will be awarded against them.”

 

C

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/205/darrenwhiteanarchist.jpghttp://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpg

 

Anarchy accompanies Jay Zero to the ring.

 

Anarchy

“I’m a little insulted Bunsen. As if we’d ever try something as cheap as cheating. Jay is one of Britain’s finest fighters in his weight class. He’s going to prove tonight that he deserves the belt and that the Wave of Violence will shortly hold every HIW title.

 

“I don’t need to interfere. And if I did you wouldn’t have to worry about ringing the bell. You’d be worrying about staying alive.”

 

C+

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

 

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/618/jaybwov.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://a.imageshack.us/img709/4193/reddragonself3.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Red Dragon defeated Jay Zero in 15:30 by pinfall with a handful of tights. Red Dragon wins the HIW Velocity title.

 

The match is intense and brutal with both men going after each other with nails, teeth and whatever they can.

 

Anarchy remains at ringside throughout but doesn’t get involved. However the distraction he provides is telling and Jay starts to get the better of the match – only for Red Dragon to defy conventions and out-cheat the arch-cheaters. The Welsh Warrior deliberately grabs hold of Jay’s shorts and clearly uses them for leverage which the ref misses whilst awarding him the title!

 

C-

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

Sergei Kalashnov talks to the crowd before his match with the Russian Bear – Marat Khoklov.

 

Sergei

“This feud has been running for years and I’m bored. Marat – you need to grow up and stop acting like little boy with milk spilt.

 

“No-one here cares what happened years ago where we come from. This is different place and different time. And one where I am the master and you are but fatty with gympass.

 

“Tonight I will put to bed all arguments. I am better man – you are just big cow.”

 

C

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/6379/maratkhoklovalt2jt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5420/sergeikalashnovalt.jpg

 

In a bout that had a good crowd and good action, Sergei Kalashnov defeated Marat Khoklov in 10:28 by submission after blatantly cheating.

 

As in the last two matches Sergei has to be on the defensive here as he faces a man twice his size.

 

As before Marat is all aggression and directness whilst Sergei is about elusiveness and speed. This cat and mouse continues for a while but Sergei reveals his new tactic – go dirty.

 

The Fresh Prince of Belarus reaches into his shorts and produces a vial of something which he hurls into Marat’s eyes. The big man starts clutching wildly at his face and staggering around and Sergei calmly takes him down before locking in his modified ankle lock – the mini-Minsk.

 

Marat is totally disorientated and forced to tap out in a massive surprise.

 

C

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/8106/thefearsomebunsen.jpg

 

The Fearsome Bunsen comes out again whilst the backstage staff is setting up the ladder match.

 

Bunsen

“I feel like Nils Bohr. This is to my knowledge the first time this match has ever been run in the world and I’m seeing new ground being broken from the best seat in the house.

 

“To recap the rules – two ladders will be in the ring beneath two hooks. The tag belts and Double Dutch’s reading material.

 

“As soon as one of these items is reached the team who recovers it will be the winners. If it’s the belts they will become tag champs. If it’s the magazines then I’m not going into their dressing room.

 

“Whichever item is not recovered will be mine to do with as I wish.

 

“Good luck to both teams.”

 

C

 

Double Dutch © (Ruud van Anger & Frank de Pain) vs. Youth Explosion (Leigh Burton & Ricky Storm) for the HIW tag titles.

 

http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/5366/ruudvananger1.jpghttp://img199.imageshack.us/img199/2843/frankdepain1.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img9.imageshack.us/img9/3493/leighburton.jpghttp://img27.imageshack.us/img27/1640/rickystorm.jpg

 

In a match that had some good action and average heat, Youth Explosion defeated Double Dutch in a Ladder match in 11:45 when Leigh Burton retrieved the tag belts. During the match we also had Bethany Hurst run in and attack Frank De Pain. Youth Explosion win the HIW Tag titles.

 

This was a real barnstormer with all four men going all out. The Dutch shook of some of their recent lethargy and Youth Explosion found their top gear.

We saw a whole load of crazy spots as both teams went for the ladders.

 

The Dutch were trying for the magazines and the Explosion boys going for the titles. Ruud van Anger was impressive and started getting close but it became apparent that Bethany (Youth Explosion’s manageress) REALLY didn’t want the magazines recovered and she actually entered the ring to collapse the ladder with Ruud on it.

 

The big fall took out Ricky Storm too but Leigh managed to recover first and slowly scaled the ladder to grab the belts.

 

B-

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

Sewer Crocodile & Victor Rodriguez both enter the ring looking ready for business but wary. Both men have a reputation for doing whatever it takes to win and clearly don’t trust their opponent much.

 

Victor Rodriguez speaks first

“Where I come crocodiles are known as lazy and mean creatures. They’re big and strong but because they do not work they hungry and weak. You are like that too. You open your mouth and grin but really they are laughing at you. Now you face a real fighter and I think we will see you put in your place.”

 

Sewer Croc

“A serious fighter? You’re the same guy who reads tarot cards and hangs around with that joke Hugo Lopes right?

 

“I was brought up underground in the slime and the dark. I’ve scrapped all my life for everything I have and that doesn’t stop. I’ll never relax and I’ll never be beaten because I want it more.

 

"I spat on your Portuguese friend because he’s nothing to me. He’s just another body. And I do the same to you.”

 

At that Sewer Croc really does spit – right in Victor’s face.

 

Of course no one can take that and the match begins as both men fly at each other.

 

C-

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Rodriguez

 

http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/282/floydpuderalt.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img269.imageshack.us/img269/1802/victorrodriguez.jpg

 

In a bout that had great heat and great wrestling action, Victor Rodriguez defeated Sewer Crocodile in 14:38 by pinfall. The match saw Anarchy distract Sewer Crocodile.

 

This is a far more measured affair with the participants being a lot slower and more tactical after it settles down from the start. We see a lot more reversals and chain wrestling as both men are technically accomplished.

The spit in Victor’s face did really seem to enervate Victor though and he seems very much the man of old when he was winning titles and dominating the company.

 

The match is fascinating for neutral fans but it’s the Spaniard who breaks it open with a huge Brainbuster after Anarchy came to ringside and gestured at Sewer Crocodile.

 

C+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpg

 

The lights go down and hundreds of candles are lit before a familiar booming laugh rings out.

 

Papa Shango enters the ring to his ska intro music, wearing his top hat and carrying another candle.

 

The Haitian walks down slowly to the ring and openly laughs at the fans that are waiting expectantly.

 

“You little people all sit there with your mouths open waiting for something to happen. It already has. I entered your little company and took your champion, your title and your enjoyment.

 

“Tonight I take your little hero and beat him down to size.

 

“I know you harbour ideas that Dragon can win but that’s because you don’t understand. I am stronger than Ali Bloxsome and his pathetic forest spells. I’m stronger than all of you people put together.

 

“Tonight is the night where you all realise it too.”

UK Dragon also enters the ring but doesn’t do it at Shango’s slow pace. The Dragon sprints down instead and dispensing with any formality tears into the champion immediately.

 

C+

 

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

 

http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/6127/haitivoodude2.jpghttp://img808.imageshack.us/img808/2392/versus2.jpghttp://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpg

 

In a bout that had a good crowd and good action, UK Dragon defeated Papa Shango in 30:05 by pinfall with a Dragon Drop. UK Dragon wins the High Impact UK Championship title.

 

The crowd had been waiting for this match and it didn’t disappoint. It had everything with two competitors who not only went flat out for victory and knew every trick in the book.

 

The match went back and forward for a solid half an hour but as it became apparent that Shango could no longer rely on his voodoo skills to win the match Dragon seized it by the scruff of the neck and hit his famed Dragon Drop from the top rope.

 

B-

 

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/48/ukdragonalt1jt.jpg

After the match UK Dragon celebrates wildly and invites fans to storm the ring.

 

Dragon

“All year Shango has been messing with honest men and throwing his weight around at HIW. Now that Ali Bloxsome has finally managed to turn him into just another wrestler HIW can carry on again.

 

“I’m taking this opportunity to offer an open challenge. No more champions trying to shirk matches and stay elusive. You all know me. I’m confident and good at what I do. I’ll fight anyone and I’ll put this belt on the line when I do it.

 

“It’s not people like me that make this company. Ladies and gentlemen – you are HIW!“ C+

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Overall show rating: C+

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Thanks for reading and posting everybody. it always feels great to get a month done, dusted and in the bank.

 

That show was mostly what I hoped for but I was slightly disappointed by the Jay/Red Dragon match. Those two should be doing better than a 56. On the other hand Y.E and D Ducth managed a 72! Thats a phenomenal result even if it did include a boost for the titles/p0rn/ladder match.

 

And after that show Ive got 5 guys on the who's hot list for the first time ever!

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

 

Predictions

 

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

The titles

 

Wow! 0/5! Sorry to be so harsh when youve kindly nominated and voted for this diary... :o At least you got the bonus to get 1/6

 

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Mags

 

2/5 Im afraid. the Croc loss was a big shock I guess.

 

QUICK PICKS

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

Bacon? If not, magazines!

 

Welcome BK and thanks for predicting. No bacon Im afraid. Hope we didnt disappoint you too much.

2/5

 

Papa Shango © vs. UK Dragon for the HIW UK title

 

Sewer Crocodile vs. Victor Hugo

Wait is this one vs. two or just Rodriquez vs. Crocodile? I assume it´s 1 vs. 1 in which case Crocodile will win as though Victor got a big win in last show he still isn´t on the same level.

 

Jay Zero © vs. Red Dragon for the HIW velocity title

 

Double Dutch © vs. Youth Explosion for the HIW tag titles

 

Marat Khoklov vs. Sergei Kalashnov

 

Bonus point:

Which item will be recovered in the tag title match?

Magazines of course everyone knows that´s more important than some tag titles:p

 

1/5. Sorry about the Victor confusion. great logic as always but dodgy booking.

 

As always when I get low scores i consider it a bad job from my side. Sorry everyone!

 

MJStark and Boomking are joint winners so BoomKing gets the win on countback. Congrats sir - please feel free to pick any merch you'd like.

 

http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/7529/hiwf.jpg

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