The Kid and The Business

[GardnerFTW]

I'd say probably a combination of the two. Bigger suprises save for the shows, but I don't see a problem with some things being discussed backstage as well.

[pate]

You could hint at it backstage, and then reveal in the show.

[GatorBait19]

wait which part are we talking about

[mad5226]

Nice...I think its a little obvious that every WWF diary that is booked...I was shocked to see it happen so quickly though. No saying I dont like it cause I do

[Greg McNeish]

I'm voting backstage. Your shows are good (especially your portrayals of Heenan & Piper), but your backstage stuff is excellent. It's the behind the scenes factor that's hooking me.

[keefmoon]

By the way, forgot to mention the argument between The Kid and Gorilla. Unreal. Absolutely fantastic. I was actually really hoping The Kid would just man up and say thank you, which to get me that involved in something like this is amazing. I know I've said it before but it is the imperfection of the main character that makes this so compelling. I love it.

[falling_star]

By the way, forgot to mention the argument between The Kid and Gorilla. Unreal. Absolutely fantastic. I was actually really hoping The Kid would just man up and say thank you, which to get me that involved in something like this is amazing. I know I've said it before but it is the imperfection of the main character that makes this so compelling. I love it.

 

Couldn't agree more; I usually passover the backstage, 'fluff'-filled diaries but I'm loving this one.

[BoomKing]

Warning: The following post contains scenes that some readers might find unsuitable. If you are easily offended by sexual language, please do not read on.

 

“I aint gonna lie to you boys, you didn’t exactly set the world on fire tonight.”

 

Shane and The Kid couldn’t argue. They could feel the disappointment as the crowd left the building.

“It’s not our fault that the crowd isn’t into the storylines yet dad,” offered Shane reluctantly.

 

“Isn’t your fault? It’s your jobs to make them care! Don’t make me regret giving you both this opportunity already…”

 

“Look, if you knew we were gonna put on a bad show, why didn’t you stop it when you had the chance before we went to air? We thought the crowd were gonna be eating out of our hands!” said Shane more defiantly.

 

“And what exactly would you have learned if I had done that? You need to know how to book for an audience, not yourselves. Look, I’m gonna tell you something that my father told me when I was starting out…Good booking is a lot like good ****ing….”

 

Shane was visibly shocked even though he had heard his dad turn the air blue on more than one occasion. “Dad! Oh my god! There’s no way Grandad said that!”

“ Just shut up and listen will you? The old man made a good point for once in his life. When you first “make love” to a woman, you should always take time to make her feel wanted, make her feel special, lay her down gently and take things slowly. Then, when the times right, you make her orgasm. It doesn’t matter whether you come or not, as long as the woman does, she’ll be back for more. And you know what else? She’s gonna tell all her friends what a great lover you are, and before you know it, you’ll have ***** up to your elbows! Now imagine if you just started poking her in the ass straight away…sure, some girls might like that, but in my experience, it aint such a great idea. You might be having the time of your life, but she’s never gonna pop that way, and when she’s telling her friends about you, they wont touch you with a ten foot pole, and you can‘t make love on your own…well, I suppose you can, but there‘ll be nobody there to see it….you guy’s know what I’m getting at here?”

Shane and The Kid stood open mouthed at what they had just heard.

 

“Dad…that is without doubt, the most disturbing thing I have ever heard you say, and that’s saying a hell of a lot.”

 

“ You kids think you invented sex don’t you? How do you think you got here Shane?”

 

“As far as I’m concerned, you and mom did it twice to make me and Steph and you didn’t enjoy it.”

 

“ Just get your smart asses to the Prime Time tapings this week and see how a real team put on a show! And remember, good ****ers make great bookers, but butt ****ers are bad bookers.”

 

Vince left Shane and The Kid to contemplate this deep and meaningful conversation.

“So….that was weird. I’m meeting up with a few friends for a quick drink. You wanna tag along?”

“Ummm, no thanks, after that I gotta go re-evaluate a few things. Thanks though. I’ll see you at Prime Time I guess.”

[GatorBait19]

Gold!

 

 

That was just to funny

[pate]

That was awesome.

[pepper2008]

:eek:Wow you learn something new everyday:cool:

[Josh]

The funny thing is, I could picture Vince being a bit like that in real life in regards to not giving a crap who he's talking to. I'm really loving this.

[Hyde Hill]

Normally I dont care for real world diaries but this backstage stuff plus the nostalgia factor got me hooked.

[keefmoon]

Bloody hell, when did this become a Swiss Tony sketch?! "Booking a wrestling show is much like making love to a beautiful woman..."

 

Still made me laugh, though.

[BoomKing]

Thankyou everyone as always for the feedback. I was a little unsure about throwing this up as it's a bit of a departure from the normal, but hopefully it will make sense in the long run!

 

Guilty as charged on the Swiss Tony comment Keef! In fact, I'm thinking of incorperating a lot of Fast Show characters. Im bringing in Repo man but changing him to "I'll nick anything me" man. He's a little bit wooo a little bit waaay. Aldo Montoya is going to start wearing a bad suit and cutting promo's in his native tongue, "Eth eth eth eth, eth eth eth eth, Chris Waddle." and his new manager Sunny will be rechristened Scorchio. Jake The Snake is going to start rambling incoherently because he is, of course, very very drunk. INT WRESTLING BRILLIAAAAAANT!

[MVP]

This diary just keeps getting better. I've managed to catch up on 12 pages of excellent writing and realistic booking. Keep up the good work!

 

Btw, lol at Vinnie's analogy, I'll keep that in mind when I'm playing TEW.

[BoomKing]

This diary just keeps getting better. I've managed to catch up on 12 pages of excellent writing and realistic booking. Keep up the good work!

 

Btw, lol at Vinnie's analogy, I'll keep that in mind when I'm playing TEW.

 

Thankyou very much Montel Vontavious Porter, if that is your real name.... Great to see somebody else getting on board so far in!

[slack]

Boom King, this is some good stuff man! Now don't get your ego too big.... in the story, or on these boards.

[MVP]

Thankyou very much Montel Vontavious Porter, if that is your real name.... Great to see somebody else getting on board so far in!

 

Oh noes! My secret identity has been revealed~!

 

Well, it's never too late to catch up on a dynasty like this one, can't wait to see how things develop on the road to Wrestlemania (both in and out of the ring)

[BoomKing]

If there was one thing that The Kid hadn’t quite got used to yet, one part of the business that still overwhelmed him, it was the atmosphere backstage before a show. It was a hive of activity, a carnival of multicoloured characters each with their own agenda. The Kid and Shane cut through the madness to where Vince and Patterson stood discussing the night’s card.

 

“Hey get over here and learn something you two!” shouted Vince when he saw them.

“We’re pulling the trigger on the Hogan situation tonight guys…speaking of which, has anybody seen him?”

 

“Well,” said Patterson, “He got here a couple of hours ago, but nobodies seen him since…”

“Well get your finger out your butt and find him Pat, he’s up first!”

“Yes Mr McMahon, I’ll get right on it sir.”

 

Owen Hart and Tito Santana were in the ring competing in a lively dark match for the crowd in attendance, and the show was due to start shortly after the match. A gentleman dressed in a sharp suit pulled Vince to one side and said something quietly to Vince that brought a wry smile to his face.

 

“He’s here Pat, he’s in my office right now, this is gonna be great! Shane, you come with me, Kid, you stay and help Patterson find Hogan.”

 

Vince and Shane power-strutted off…like father like son I suppose.

 

“Who’s “He” Mr Patterson?”

 

“I’m afraid I can’t tell you Kid, Vince is playing this one pretty close to his chest, only those that gotta know gotta know. All I can tell you is that it’s someone big-time coming in…So that’s a pretty tough break getting shafted to Superstars. I was looking forward to having you on my team, Kid.”

 

“Yeah well, it was Mr McMahon’s call. I’m just glad to still have a job.”

“Don’t be so modest, you got a bright future, I’m sure you’ll be on the A show soon enough. How are you and Shane getting along?”

“Pretty good so far thanks.”

 

“It’s just that I hear he can be a little work shy, likes to party hard. Just because he’s Vince’s son, don’t let him give you all the work Kid. I’d hate to see him take advantage of you.”

“Well thanks Mr Patterson, but he’s been real good so far. He’s got a lot of great ideas in him and we’re getting on great.”

“OK, It’s just that if I’ve learned anything about the McMahon’s, it’s that they can be real nice whilst things are going well, but don’t mistake it for weakness. Just keep your eyes open…”

 

The voice of ring announcer Howard Finkle resonates around the backstage area as Owen Hart defeats Santana with an enziguiri.

 

“****, where the hell is Hogan! Dammit, were gonna have to put the LOD match on first. I’ll go and tell Hawk and Animal, you check around for Hogan kid.”

 

Patterson frantically scrambled to try and salvage his running order as The Kid headed for the locker rooms. He saw Warrior rehearsing a promo, and despite things being OK between the two of them lately, The Kid decided to duck into the bathrooms to avoid a confrontation. He wasn’t sure how, but as soon as he walked in, he could sense the presence of The Hulkster in one of the stalls. Perhaps Hulkamania ran so wildly that he could literally feel it in the air. Or perhaps it was the yellow boots poking out from under the door. Either way it was clear that Hogan was there, and by the smell of things, he had certainly been eating his vitamins. The Kid approached the door tentatively. It was an n awkward situation for sure. He knocked gently.

“Mr Hogan sir? Is that you?”

“Get lost, can’t you see I’m busy.”

“But Mr Hogan, the shows starting, you’re due on.”

“I aint going on, do the show without me!”

“Sir, your scheduled to appear and make your decision tonight!”

 

Hogan went quiet for a moment.

“Get in here Kid.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me! I aint gonna bite dude, get in here!”

 

The Kid reluctantly opened the door. Hogan was clearly shaken.

 

“What’s wrong Mr Hogan?”

“I don’t know Kid…Its just, I’ve been in this business a long time, and I’ve always been on top, brother. I’ve always made the most money because I’ve always brought in the crowds. I don’t want to have to use my creative control all the time, but I don’t want to lose my spot either dude. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

 

The Kid could see Hogan needed a pick me up if he was going to go through with what they had planned. He drew upon all his motivational speaking experience, but only one thing kept springing to mind, and it came from a very dark place.

“You see Mr Hogan…”

 

He was going to do it.

 

“Good wrestling is a lot like…”

 

He was really going to do it

 

“…good sex.”

 

He did it

 

“What the hell are you talking about Kid? I didn’t ask you in here for that!”

“No, no, you don’t understand! What I mean is…when you go out to the ring; you know pretty much how you want things to end up, right? Well, when you make love, you know, to a woman, you also know how you want to end up. Now, there’s a million and one ways to get to the end, and your partner might have different ideas to you, but as long as you get to the finish and you are both equally satisfied, then everybody’s happy. Sometimes it‘s good to be on top, but your partners gonna want to be on top too.”

 

Hogan looked on, not amused.

 

“What I’m trying to say is that in the long run, it really doesn’t matter whether you take on Warrior for the title, or Undertaker in the cage, because the fans will always love you. There will always be a Hulk Hogan, but if you don’t let someone else on top from time to time, you’re going to be making love to yourself.”

 

“You know something brother?” said Hogan with a deadpan look on his face, “that actually made some sense in a bizarre kinda way. I think I know what I gotta do.”

 

Hogan pushed past The Kid, washed his hands, and barged his way through to the backstage. Whilst they were away, the LOD had beaten The Barbarian and Haku, and The Undertaker had beaten up Earthquake and Max Moon before their match. His manager Paul Bearer claimed that The Undertaker was on a path of destruction, and dared anyone to stand in his way. The Rockers and The Orient Express were currently in the ring. Vince, Patterson and Shane stood watching from backstage.

 

“There he is!” exclaimed Vince. “You better have a good explanation Hogan! We had to rearrange the whole show thanks to your little disappearing act!”

 

Hulk stopped dead in his tracks and hung his head.

 

“Yeah, I’m sorry Vince; I had a little soul searching to do…”

 

“Well next time, don’t do it during a taping OK? Now we’re giving you a few minutes on the mic at the end of the show to make the announcement, don’t screw it up.”

 

The Rockers made short work of The Orient Express and challenged the new tag champs to a title match. The rockers claimed they were the number one contenders because they held a pinfall victory over the nasty boys at The Royal Rumble.

 

Sgt Slaughter had his first singles match since The Rumble, beating Shane Douglas handily. Jim Duggan came out after the match and reissued his challenge. The two traded insults before agreeing to face each other in a flag match at WrestleMania.

 

The Ultimate Warrior beat Paul Roma, and it was time for Hogan’s Promo.

[pate]

Cliffhanger!

[BoomKing]

(Real American blasts through the speakers at the Gainesville O-dome, sending the fans into raptures.)

 

Gorilla- This capacity crowd is on its feet for The Hulkster! Tonight’s the night folks that we learn whether Hulk Hogan will take on WWF Champion The Ultimate Warrior or The Undertaker at WrestleMania.

 

Heenan- I already know his decision Monsoon!

 

Gorilla- Care to enlighten us Brain?

 

Heenan- Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you? I’m not going to spoil the surprise for all our fans!

(Hogan makes his way to the ring and all the Hulkamaniacs in attendance are cheering his name as he poses. Mean Gene joins him in the ring.)

 

Okerland- Hulk Hogan…we all know why you’re out here tonight. You have had a hard decision to make, but make it you must. Enquiring minds need to know Hulk, who are you going to face, The Undertaker, or The Ultimate Warrior?

(Hogan pauses for a second before grabbing the microphone.)

 

Hogan- Let me tell you something Mean Gene! Everywhere I go, the question is always the same, Warrior or Undertaker? All the Hulkamaniacs want to know…and up until a short time ago, I thought I had the answer.

 

I don’t care who they are, every wrestler in that locker room wants to be in the main event at WrestleMania Brother! Everybody dreams of winning the WWF title on the grandest stage of them all, and The Hulkster is no different. I want to go into WrestleMania and return the conquering hero for all my little Hulkamaniacs in the crowd!

(The crowd cheer loudly at the prospect of Hogan taking on The Warrior)

 

Heenan- I knew it Gorilla! That coward’s running scared from The Undertaker!

 

Hogan- And that’s what everything comes down to brothers, being a hero. You know what dudes, I’ve always trained hard, said my prayers and fought for what’s right. A friend of mine once told me that being a hero is a lot like…well; it’s a lot like….Ice Cream. Everybody loves Ice Cream, especially the Hulkster! I could eat Ice Cream all day and I’d be happy, but eventually I’d start to put on weight, and all the prayers and Vitamins in the world wouldn’t be able to help me. So sometimes, even though I want Ice Cream real bad, I know that I have to eat my vegetables instead, because it’s the right thing to do.

 

What I’m trying to say, dudes, is that sometimes, it’s not enough to do something because we want to; we do things because we have to. We do things even though we know we won’t like it. I thought I was going to come out here and tell you all I would be fighting for the WWF title at WrestleMania, but a true hero doesn’t need personal glory. A true hero does what he thinks is the right thing to do. So tonight, I officially announce that at WrestleMania, I will be facing The Undertaker in a steel cage match!

(The crowd are on their feet once more)

 

Heenan- I knew it Gorilla! Hogan lost to The Ultimate Warrior last year and he knows he would have lost again!

 

Gorilla- Will you make up your mind!?

 

Hogan- Undertaker! You’ve battered and bruised me in the past, and I’ve always come back for more! You’ve choke slammed me in the ring and outside the ring! You’ve declared war on me, you’ve held a funeral for me, and you’ve made my life hell! Well guess what Undertaker, I’m a big boy brother, and I can take whatever you dish out! But then tonight, you turned your attentions to people who had nothing to do with me and you. You beat up Max Moon and The Earthquake for no other reason than to get under my skin! You left them for dead in the ring because you knew it would get a reaction out of me! You knew I couldn’t stand by whilst innocent people were injured in the crossfire, that’s not the Hulkamaniac way brother!

 

So now you’ve got my full attention. Me and you inside a steel cage. No interference, no escape, no rules whatsoever. Now you’re one scary dude Undertaker, and I know it’s going to be the hardest fight of my life, but ‘m gonna give it my all because it’s the right thing to do.

 

Now, I don’t make the matches around here, but it seems to me that there’s one man around here who deserves a title shot. I might not agree with the way he’s been moaning lately, but Randy Savage didn’t get eliminated from the Royal Rumble…

 

(Money, money, money interrupts The Hulkster, and the fans in attendance boo the arrival of The Million Dollar man and his lackeys Haku and The Barbarian.)

 

Dibiase- Now hold on a minute Hogan. Your right, you don’t make the matches around here, and if anyone should get a title shot, it’s me!

 

Hogan- You? Why do you deserve a title shot brother?

 

Dibiase- Deserve? Who said anything about deserving it? I wanna buy it! Jack Tunney, if your listening, I’ll give you a million dollars cold hard cash if you give me a match for the WWF title at WrestleMania! Hahahaha!

(Dibiase heads towards the ring and comes face to face with Hogan.)

 

Hogan- Let me tell you something, brother! The WWF title is not for sale!

 

Dibiase- Everything has a price for the million dollar man, you know that Hulk!

(Dibiase laughs in Hogan’s face as Haku and Barbarian surround him, until the arena lights go out! When they come back on, The Undertaker is stood in-between all four men! Taker looks at Dibiase who backs off, before turning around and nailing Hogan with a right hand! Dibiase and his employees take this as their cue to put the boot into Hogan!)

 

Gorilla- What a mugging! This is a vicious four on one unprovoked attack!

 

Heenan- Unprovoked? Hogan’s been running his mouth for the past half hour or so, they were just worried the show was going to run too long!

 

Gorilla- That’s a bit of an exaggeration Brain…Wait a minute! Holy Mackerel! The Ultimate Warrior is on his way to the ring…

 

Heenan- He’s had enough of Hogan too!

 

Gorilla- No! He’s helping Hogan fend them off, but the numbers are catching up to them.

(The Macho Man runs to join the carnage. He seems to weigh up whether to help Hogan and Warrior or Dibiase and Undertaker.)

 

Gorilla- Macho King is here, but whose side is he on?

 

Heenan- I think I know Gorilla!

(Savage enters the ring…and levels Dibiase with a clothesline! He’s looking to even the numbers and the crowd is going banana’s. The three men clear the ring apart from The Undertaker who is still staggering on his feet. Hogan hits him with a big boot…and follows with a leg drop, but The Phenom sits up Next, The Warrior hit’s the big splash and he sits up again Finally, Savage ascends to the top rope. The crowd knows what’s coming! Savage Elbow! Taker is down for the count! The three men raise each others hands in the center of the ring.)

 

Gorilla- What a spectacle! Challengers and champions alike stand tall in the ring as their common foe lies motionless in the ring!

[GatorBait19]

Brillance, pure brillance

 

Love how the kid tried to do Vince's speech

 

 

and love Macho's turn, handled perfectly

 

and I see Dibiase vs Warrior at Mania for the title with Dibiase winning

 

not sure about taker though

[mad5226]

You handeled the Hogan promo perfectly man. I could actually hear Hogan's voice during the whole thing

[Josh]

Yet again, I am absolutely loving this. I was laughing when the Kid used Vince's speech to Hogan, and yet you executed the story perfectly. Loving this.