Heckbent for Leather: An SWF Tale

[Discotheque]

[I]From the PWFlashlight: -It appears that SWF Champion Steve Frehley is NOT going to renew his contract with the company and will be seeking greener pastures.[/I] [I]From the SWF Website: -Tonight, Richard Eisen confronts Steve Frehley about his future in the company.[/I] [I]From the Pro Wrestling Viewer: -Rumour has it that tonight will see a second attempt at a Runaway Train title reign. Workrate fans sharpen thier negative star ratings.[/I]

[Midnightnick]

The sheer fact of the title of this diary and the idea of Runaway Train getting another reign is making me read this diary.

[Discotheque]

[B]Supreme TV First Week of July, 2006[/B] [B]Ace Youngblood vs. Flash Savage[/B] After a solid minute of Flash Savage offense, Ace slaps on the Coyote Clutch and gets the shockingly fast submission. Winner: Ace Youngblood [I]1:38 submission D[/I] [B]Eisen's Big Announcement[/B] Richard Eisen comes to the ring without his music and looking less like Richard Eisen the character and more like Richard Eiesen the man. Stress radiates from him as he grabs the mic, the bass gone from his voice. "As you all know, Steve Frehley has decided that we are not the company for him any longer and that he wants to pursue other avenues. You know what? I am fine with that. What I am not fine with is that Mr. Frehley is currently carrying MY company's World Heavyweight Title. I can't just strip him of it and I can't just let him show up in another company with MY belt. So, I went to the Championship Commitee and we came to an agreement." Eisen takes a second to compose himself and get back into character. He clears his throat, squares his shoulders, and lifts the mike to his mouth. "Tonight, in this very ring, there will be a World Heavyweight Tournament. The winner will carry the be the World Champion, obviously, but there is a small twist. The winner of the tournament also recieves my spot as President of the Championship Commitee. That means that the champion can not only reap the benefits of being champion but also has the power to make and break matches. This boon was the only way I could convince the Committee that this was not an effort to simply remove Mr. Frehley, but, instead, to change the way in which the title is treated. Tonight, everything is on the line." Richard Eisen smiles wide and sadistically and points to the entrance ramp. "Here are your participants: Steve Frehley!" Crowd goes nuts. "REMO!" A surprising number of cheers come up from the crowd. "MY boy: Eric Eisen!" Weak reaction. "And..." The crowd and announcers both anticipate Runaway Train... "GREASE HOGG!" The whole place erupts in a din of confusion and Richard Eisen leaves the ring. [I]B+[/I] [B]REMO vs. Steve Frehley[/B] A tight, snug, and stiff match between two quality grapplers. REMO goes down to Frehley's Comet and the crowd is stomping and cheering wildly. Winner: Steve Frehley [I]7:44 Pin A[/I] [B]Grease Hogg vs. Eric Eisen[/B] Eric seems to have a counter to every single one of Hogg's power moves. The two are measuring each other up, trying to figure out how to put the other one away, when Richard Eisen makes his way to ringside. He trips his own flesh and blood! Grease Hogg nails the Grease Spot! Winner: Grease Hogg [I]7:35 Pin A[/I] [B]Up Close And Personal With: Jack Bruce[/B] Jack Bruce shows a camera crew around his hometown and even introduces the viewers to his parents. Suddenly, it becomes clear that there is a serious athlete under the purple hair. [I]A[/I] [B]Runaway Train vs. Jack Bruce[/B] A video hypes the two future legends. [I]A[/I] [B]Marc DuBois vs. Calamari Kid[/B] [I]Ladder Match for the Shooting Star Title[/I] In a night of intense matches, Dubois and Calamari elevate thier game to a new high. MOTYC. DuBois piledrives the ladder off of the top rope onto Calamari's throat to put him away. Winner and STILL Champ: Marc DuBois [I]10:15 Retrieval A[/I] [B]Enforcer is in the Parking Lot[/B] Enforcer is throwing a duffel bag into his car and leaving. That bag has Christian Faith's name on it! [I]B+[/I] [B]Grease Hogg vs. Steve Frehley[/B] [I]No Rope Barbed Wire Match for the World Heavywieght Title[/I] Barbaric, bloody, and shocking. Only shown on TV from long shots, giving the whole match the look of a shuff film. Hogg is wearing his full leathers and spends most of the match tearing Frehley's gear off. The match, mercifully, ends with a Stun Gun across the barbed wire. Winner and NEW Champ: Grease Hogg! [I]14:15 Cheating/Pin B+[/I] [B]Close Up[/B] The show ends with a tight shot of Grease Hogg's bloody face, his lips curled into a cruel smile, his eyes burning with malice. Peter Michaels-"Richard Eiesen has started a new era. God help us all."

[NickC13573]

Swerve!!!!!!

[Discotheque]

[I]PWFlashlight Reports: - Apparently the other wrestling news sites were totally wrong about the reascention of Runaway Train into the World Title picture. Dumbasses.[/I] [I]Pro Wrestling Viewer Reports: - Insider sources say that backstage politicking by Grease Hogg, Lead Belly, and Brains McGee sabotaged the Runaway Train push. That or we were totally wrong.[/I] [I]SWF's Website: - Will Grease Hogg's Reign Last More Than 3 Days? Can Eric Eisen Get Revenge For His Betrayal?[/I]

[Midnightnick]

Wow, this is the Cornellverse Russo Booked WCW. Best. Swerve. Ever.

[Discotheque]

[B]SWF Presents Welcome To The Jungle[/B] From the lovely Kemper Arena in Kansas City, MO, comes SWF's Welcome To The Jungle! [B][I]Dark Matches[/I][/B] [B]Lords Of War Interview[/B] The Lords of War call the Biggz Boyz "the Little Girlz" and say that there will be some heavy pain involved in thier match tonight. Cue the disturbing laughter. [I]B-[/I] [B]Biggz Boyz vs. the Lords of War[/B] A shockingly one sided affair, with the Lords unable to isolate either Biggz or stop thier offense. A Biggz Up ends it. Winners: Biggz Boyz [I]11:31 Pin C+[/I] [B]Main Show[/B] [B]Ace Youngblood vs. Flash Savage[/B] Ace tries the Coyote Clutch early, but Flash is able to counter it and slingshot Ace to the outside. A little brawling and Flash's offense keep thing interesting until Ace hits the Coyote Clutch clean, in the middle of the ring. Flash taps! Winner: Ace Youngblood [I]6:16 Pin D[/I] [B]The Amazing Bumfholes vs. Death Row[/B] [I]Number One Contenders for the Tag Team Titles Match[/I] The Bumfholes trademark double teams keep the Row from getting any traction in the match. Spike Piledriver on Knuckles! Winners: The Amazing Bumfholes [I]9:39 Pin C+[/I] [B]Hell Monkey vs. Marc DuBois[/B] [I]Shooting Star Title Match[/I] Hell Monkey works a stiff match with some truly vicious strikes. After a few near falls, DuBois turns Monkey's mask sideways, lowblows him, and pins him with his feet on the ropes, thanks to a fast count from the referee he paid off. Yeah, he cheats a little. Winner and STILL Champion: Marc DuBois [I]7:49 Cheat/Pin A[/I] [B]Marc Celebrates[/B] Marc tours all four corners and washes in the boos of the crowd. [I]B[/I] [B]The Squid Squad vs. Flex and Pecs[/B] Jumbo Shrimp has the match of his life. Flex gets to do job duty after a Lariat. Winners: The Squid Squad [I]9:48 Pin B-[/I] [B]Jack Bruce Interview[/B] Jack talks to Peter Michaels about how he wants to be taken seriously as a wrestler and not just a good-looking poseur. He says that tonight is his night. [I]A[/I] [B]Sexual Aggression vs. High Concept[/B] [I]Tag Team Title Match[/I] High Concept find that Joe Sexy won't stay down. After a surprisingly physical match, Groucho goes down with a Broken Rib, while Elmo rolls up Sexy. A pyrrhic victory for the champs. Winners and STILL Tag Team Champions: High Concept [I]20:20 Pin B[/I] [B]Runaway Train Interview[/B] Runaway Train talks to Peter Michaels about his big match with Jack Bruce. Tonight is the return of the old Runaway Train. God have mercy on Jack Bruce's soul, because tonight Runaway Train is taking him all the way to Hell. [B]Runaway Train vs. Jack Bruce[/B] [I]Number One Contender for the World Heavyweight Title[/I] Jack Bruce starts the match with some strikes and transitions into a ground attack. The crowd is heavily behind Jack Bruce's new style, when Train no sells a kick, punches Bruce straight in the throat, and powerbombs him over the top rope to the floor. Bruce doesn't make the ten count. Or a fifty count for that matter. Winner and NEW Numbewr One Contender: Runaway Train [I]11:53 Countout A[/I] [B]Sam Keith vs. Enygma[/B] Sam Keith is a man on fire, tearing up Enygma with brutal move after brutal move. Keith has Enygma in position for a piledriver when Enygma manages a surge of strength. Keith is flipped over, leg dropped, and hit with the Enygmatic Enterprise. Winner: Enygma [I]14:42 Pin A[/I] [B]Enforcer Roberts Video[/B] Enforcer Roberts is shown pounding on a man dressed like Enygma. He yanks the man's mask off, and it's Christian Faith! The bloodied Faith is put into a car trunk. [B]Richard Eisen Announces Main Event[/B] Wearing a nicer than usual suit, Richard Eisen is backstage. "Tonight, I will make amends for my sins. Tonight, I will make my son love me again. Truth is, he cannot understand that I was protecting him Tuesday night. I was saving his body from the abuse that a barbed wire match would have inflicted on him. I saved the company that will one day be his from that Benedict Arnold we don't need to name. Now, I give him a gift. Tonight, my son Eric Eisen faces the World Heavyweight Champion Grease Hogg in a standard match. No special rules. No outside interference. Two men enter, one man leaves. You might not trust me Eric, but I believe in you. Tonight you will do me proud." A serious looking Richard Eisen looks into the camera, a single tear rolls down his face. [I]A[/I] [B]Grease Hogg Promo[/B] Grease Hogg walks into the ring, picks up the mic, smiles at the crowd. Then, he turns his face into a horrendous scowl and spikes the mic down. He's all business tonight. [I]B+[/I] [B]Eric Eisen vs. Grease Hogg[/B] [I]World Heavyweight Title Match[/I] Having wrestled each other just days before, Eric is ****y about Hogg's offense. Too ****y. Eisen gets cut off every time he goes on offense. Hogg drops knowledge on Eisen in the form of nasty looking right hooks. A nasty Grease Spot ends it. Winner and STILL Champion: Grease Hogg [I]17:57 Pin B+[/I] [B]Hogg Celebrates[/B] Hogg paints the belt with Eisen's blood and laughs in the middle of the ring, with Lead Belly, Brains McGee, the Lords of War, and Big Smack Scott surrounding him.

[Discotheque]

[I]PW Flashlight: - Is Grease Hogg TRYING to get SWF kicked off of television? Richard Eisen is apparently horrified by the ideas his new champ is proposing to institute.[/I] [I]Pro Wrestling Viewer: - Runaway Train is well on his way to being the biggest face in the company IF he can topple Grease Hogg. But who can stop Grease Hogg?[/I] [I]SWF Website: - Eric Eisen has been told he must attend tonights show, no matter how injured he may be. High Concept have recieved similar messages.[/I]

[Discotheque]

[B]SWF Supreme TV[/B] Live from Rolla, MO. [B]Dark Matches[/B] [B]Richard Eisen Makes An Announcement[/B] "Due to the competitive nature of the North American Title scene, I am declaring a Best of Seven Series between REMO and Lobster Warrior to determine the best North American Champion in... umm, North America. Next week, we will see match one of the series... a taped fist match!" [I]A[/I] [B]Lobster Warrior Hypes Series[/B] Lobster Warrior gets on the stick and thanks the "Little Crusties" for being behind him and he promises to dismantle REMO. [I]A[/I] [B]Kid Toma vs. Ace Youngblood[/B] Kid Toma is a house afire. They have a Pier 6 brawl all over the ringside area and Kid Toma hits a Tornado DDT. Winner: Kid Toma [I]12:48 Pin D[/I] [B]Main Show[/B] [B]Alan Parent vs. Marc DuBois[/B] [I]Shooting Star Title Match[/I] Parent tries to take DuBois to the mat. DuBois has none of it and hits the Marc of Excellence. Winner and STILL Champion: Marc DuBois [I]8:06 Pin B-[/I] [B]Richard Eisen Confronts Eric[/B] "Eric, my boy, you can't say I didn't try. I gave you a match that you should have won handily. You couldn't get it done, could you? Why? Because you suck! There, I said it. My son sucks. So, tonight, you get a chance to avenge yourself. If you win your match tonight, you get one more shot at Mr. Hogg. Fail, and you lose your job, your piece of the company, and your name. Lose tonight and you are no longer an Eisen! Say hello to my new son, Runaway Train... umm Eisen! RT Eisen will likely dismantle you tonight, but at least you'll be too comatose to know how much you let me down. Loser." [I]A[/I] [B]Enygma vs. Lobster Warrior[/B] [I]North American Title[/I] Enygma is completely out classed by the superior Lobster Warrior. Warrior hits the Lobster Trap. Winner and STILL Champion: Lobster Warrior [I]10:12 Pin A[/I] [B]Biggz and Brave Promo[/B] The Biggz Boyz and Akima Brave challenge the Lords of War and Big Smack Scott to a 6 man tag match. Awesomeness ensues! [I]C[/I] [B]Squid Squad vs. Sexual Aggression[/B] Sexy gets some massive offense and scores a pin with his feet on the ropes. Winners: Sexual Aggression [I]7:05 Pin B[/I] [B]Sam Keith's New Leaf[/B] Sam Keith is shown rescuing a kitten from a tree and getting a glass of milk for it to drink. What a swell guy! [I]B+[/I] [B]The Amazing Bumfholes vs. High Concept[/B] [I]Tag Team Title Match[/I] The gimpy Groucho gets double teamed and gets pinned by the Amazing Bumfholes. Winners and NEW Tag Team Champs: The Amazing Bumfholes [I]8:05 Pin B[/I] [B]Hype Video: Runaway Train vs. Jack Bruce[/B] MOTYC!!! OMG! [I]A[/I] [B]Lead Belly vs. Flash Savage[/B] Lead Belly absorbs all of Flash Savage's offense and frustrates him to the point that Flash uses a chair on Belly. Belly walks off laughing. Winner: Lead Belly [I]5:31 DQ C[/I] [B]Hogg Confronts Zimmy[/B] Grease Hogg tells Zimmy Bumfhole that if he isn't more friendly with the Dirty White Boys then his brother might suffer. [I]B-[/I] [B]Eric Eisen vs. Runaway Train[/B] [I]Number One Contender's Match[/I] Eisen fights with clenched fists and nasty kicks. Nothing seems to phase the monster. Train Wreck! Winner and STILL Number One Contender: Runaway Train [I]9:49 Pin B+[/I] Fade out.

[Discotheque]

[I]PW Flashlight: - It appears that Runaway Train is being held off of TV for a week so that he can debut his new look and finisher. With the premiere episode of Syndicated Bloodshed coming up next week and Under Control in two weeks, there is plenty of opportunity for something big to develope.[/I] [I]Pro Wrestling Viewer: - Could it be that a housecleaning is happening in the SWF? After Frehley's departure, there seems to be a growing number of stalwarts not being offered new contracts and outside talent being offered big money contracts. Could new head booker, CH Platt's longstanding hatred of DAVE play into this talent grab?[/I] [I]SWF Website: -Robbie Retro calls Grease Hogg out at a house show in Duluth, claims to have won Number One Contender after winning a tournament in Brazil.[/I]

[Discotheque]

[B]SWF Supreme TV[/B] From Detroit, MI. [B]Dark Matches[/B] [B]Warlord Agony, Warlord Pain, and Big Smack Scott Are On The Mic[/B] The Three War Pigs accept the challenge of the Biggz Boyz and Akima Brave for a 6-Man Tag Match at Under Control. [B]Snap Dragon vs. Squeaky McClean[/B] Snap makes his debut in a dark match against criminally underused worker Squeaky. A very unusual match, by SWF standards, in that Squeaky played a traditional heel and Snap played a hybrid style heel. Between Squeaky's foreign objects and Snap's dirty holds and blows, the ref finally had enough. Winner: Squeaky McClean [I]13:06 DQ B[/I] [B]Main Show[/B] [B]Death Row vs. the Samoan Wildboyz[/B] Physical and fast match with some innovative offense from both sides. Kid Toma kills Knuckles with a Suicide Headbutt. Winners: the Samoan Wildboyz [I]8:37 Pin C+[/I] [B]Marc DuBois Speaks to the Crowd[/B] "You silly, silly Americans. I have fought your Squid Man and your Monkey Dude, I have beaten the very best that you have to offer and yet I am booed? Why is that? Have I not yet defeated enough stinky Americans with my Marc of Excellence? Fine then. Any one of you in the back who thinks he can be a better Shooting Star Champion than I, the Excellent One, can come out here and get Marced for Death." [B]Mystery Man[/B] Unfamiliar music hits, and out comes Jessie with her newest beau... Matt Sparrow! Matt cracks his knuckles and it's on! [B]Matt Sparrow vs. Marc DuBois[/B] [I]Shooting Star Championship Match[/I] Matt comes on hard and wild, shocking the crowd and DuBois. Marc gets an emergancy thumb to the eye before taking control. Marc of Excellence and the belt stays with the French-Canadian Star! Winner and STILL Champion: Marc DuBois [I]9:40 Pin B+[/I] [B]Hype for Enygma/ Enforcer Roberts Match at Under Control[/B] Man, those two hate each other. [B]Lords of War vs. the Amazing Bumfholes[/B] The Bumfholes remember thier debut match and pound the Lords with a passion. The Lords try to isolate Randy, but Zimmy stops thier dirty tricks. Bumfhole in One on Warlord Agony and the Bumfholes have thier first title defense. Winners and STILL Champs: The Amazing Bumfholes [I]8:11 Pin B[/I] [B]Rich Money Hypes REMO[/B] Usual back patting interview. REMO is looking pumped. [B]REMO vs. Lobster Warrior[/B] [I]North American Title Match Taped Fist Death Match[/I] Bloody, nasty, and bloody, ending with REMO catching Lobster with a wicked uppercut. He doesn't get up. Winner and NEW Champion: REMO [I]9:32 KO A[/I] [B]Skull DeBones on Commentary[/B] Skull insults Grease Hogg. Hogg is most likely nonplussed. [B]Robbie Retro vs. Grease Hogg[/B] [I]World Heavyweight Title Match[/I] Robbie kicks Grease Hogg's knee repeatedly and tries to execute some leg work. Hogg scores a Grease Spot and knocks Robbie loopy. Well, loopier. Winner and STILL Champion: Grease Hogg [I]14:55 Pin B+[/I]

[Thriller]

[QUOTE=Discotheque;161079] [I]From the Pro Wrestling Viewer: -Rumour has it that tonight will see a second attempt at a Runaway Train title reign. Workrate fans sharpen thier negative star ratings.[/I][/QUOTE] Ha.

[Discotheque]

[I]PW Flashlight: - Rumour has it that RT Eisen will be on the premiere episode of Syndicated Bloodshed with a major announcement. Could it be the rumoured new title or a roster change of epic proportions? Pro Wrestling Viewer: - Lead Belly has been observed exiting a number of nightclubs during the SWF Midwest swing. Among these establishments have been Leather and Chains, Blacker and Bluer, Bitch Seat, and the Sissy Bay. Lead Belly declined comment. - In other news, Zimmy Bumfhole has been seen talking worriedly to the champion, most likely in relation to Hogg's request for Zimmy's "cooperation." SWF's Website: - Syndicated Bloodshed will change the way you watch pro wrestling. TCW Sucks![/I]

[Discotheque]

[B]SWF Supreme TV[/B] [B]SWF Web Show[/B] [B]Kurt Laramee on the Stick[/B] "You know what? Richard Eisen, he doesn't like Kurt Laramee. He says Kurt Laramee doesn't make money. He says Kurt Laramee is a jobber. Well, kids, Kurt Laramee is going to kick the ass of the next guy who comes through that curtain." [B]Mystery Music Hits[/B] A freakishly heavy metal song hits the PA. Here comes... ACID! [B]Acid vs. Kurt Laramee[/B] Acid and Kurt go at it hard and fast. Acid is getting in his trademark spots and Kurt keeps ducking to the outside. Acid Rain Bomb! Winner: ACID [B]12:33 Pin C+[/B] [B]Main Show[/B] [B]Ace Youngblood vs. Flash Savage vs. Alan Parent vs. Calamari Kid[/B] Fast and furious cluster of Shooting Star action to start the show. Ace gets caught by the Calamari Kid. Winner: Calamari Kid [B]9:39 Pin C-[/B] [B]Backstage Camera[/B] Lead Belly corners Zimmy Bumfhole as he enters the arena and gives him a box. "Bro, I found this at a little shop and thought you'd die the second you saw it." Belly walks off and Zimmy has a shocked look on his face as he pulls a Rolex out of the box. Peter Michaels-"I wish Lead Belly admired MY cheekbones." [B]Three War Pigs vs. Biggz and Brave Video[/B] They really don't like each other. [B]Kid Toma vs. ACID[/B] ACID comes out for the main show just as hot as he was for the Web Show. Acid Rain Bomb! Winner: ACID [I]7:41 Pin C+[/I] [B]Andre Jones vs. Lead Belly[/B] Lead Belly is wearing an Amazing Bumfholes t-shirt underneath his leather jacket. Jones gets a shellacking. Winner: Lead Belly [I]7:52 Pin C+[/I] [B]Lead Belly Grabs the Mic[/B] "This one goes out to you, little buddy. I'm going to dedicate all of my wins to you, Zimmy. I can only hope I inspire you as much as I am inspired by you." [B]Death Row vs. High Concept[/B] [I]Tag Team Title Match[/I] Death Row get more offense than usual, but are unable to prevent a Shockwave From Next Year! Winners and STILL Champs: High Concept [I]12:31 Pin C+[/I] [B]Grease Hogg Promo[/B] Grease Hogg walks into the ring with a Skull DeBones poster. He rips it in half and starts laughing hysterically. He spikes the mic. [B]Jack Griffith vs. Grease Hogg[/B] [I]World Heavyweight Title Match[/I] Jack keeps up with Hogg punch for punch in the early going. Jack takes control and gets Hogg pinned for a pair of two counts. Brains McGee gets on the apron and Griffith jaw jacks with him for a second before turning around. Kick WHAM Grease Spot! Winner and STILL Champ: Grease Hogg [I]15:03 Pin B+[/I] [B]Grease Hogg Holds the Belt Over His Head and Jumps Around[/B] Yeah, what the title said. Peter Michaels-"Can anyone slow down Grease Hogg's trip down the Highway to Hell? Or is everything Under Control? And... show over.

[Discotheque]

[I]PW Flashlight: -Who is Grease Hogg's newest Dirty White Boy? Will he be called Triumph? Why else would the SWF have pursued copywrites on 'Triumph', 'Ace of Spades', and ' Panhead'? -What is Richard Eisen's grand plan for ACID? -Where is Eric Eisen? Pro Wrestling Viewer: - The SWF has been filming vignettes for Snap Dragon and Jack Bruce, as of last week. - Who are the East Coast Bias and why are they being advertised for upcoming House Shows in New York and Pennsylvania? SWF Website: -ACID and Matt Sparrow to headline Syndicated Bloodshed in a match of RT Eisen's choosing. Be afraid.[/I]