Destined to Fail 2008

[Astil]

[QUOTE=Funkomatic;538844]Four Corners of Funk Match The Heroes vs. [B]Doktor Funkenstein & Soviet Dancebot 5000 [/B] [I]Funk quotient say overwhelming victory to the forces of the Soviet Hero Groove Doktor.[/I] BWA Tag Team Championship Los Muertos Rudos (c) vs. [B]'World Tour' Tyler Idol & Hyde Hill The Holland Hitman[/B] [I]The Contenders have the moves to rule this discotheque.[/I] BWA Canadian Championship The Wrestlemaniac (c) w/ Andrew McMenamin vs. [B]Dave 'The Snake'[/B] [I]Puny capitalists cannot defeat snake![/I] PRIME TIME CHALLENGE - MATCH MADE AT THE REQUEST OF PRIME: [B]Prime & Mr Canada[/B] vs. Astil & Pirate Panix w/ Dawn Storm [I]Little Girly Man and Pirate not ready for [B]PRIME TIME[/B]![/I] BWA UK Championship Dr James Casey (c) vs. [B]Jaffa[/B] Lumberjacks: Odin, Pirate Panix, Gringo [I]Jaffa is people's biscuit. Therefore odds of victory = 1.[/I][/QUOTE] Oh hi. Who are you? Have you beaten "Little Girl Man". No. Shhhh then. :cool:

[mistaken]

[QUOTE=G-Prime;537899]Or pre-match. We're sneaky like that.[/QUOTE] Or I might just be waiting under the ring, no "run" required!

[Phantom Stranger]

Show's being worked on today, folks, though it'll probably go up either very late tonight or early tomorrow. Still time to get your predictions in!

[Phantom Stranger]

[B][CENTER]BWA Disorganised Mayhem August 2009 Held at St Luke's Church, Torquay [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/davidhallettyoungenglishman.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/emma.jpg[/IMG] [/CENTER][/B] [B]Young Englishman: [/B]Hello and welcome once again to what our American counterparts so crudely call a rocketbuster of a night- [B]Emma Whatever:[/B] Is that the guy who slobbers over knockers? [B]YE:[/B] You do realise that there are two possible answers to that question, right? [B]EW:[/B] Yes and no? [B]YE:[/B] Evidently not. Tonight, every title is on the line; as well as that we've got the Prime Time Challenge match, as requested by Prime himself, and a grudge tag contest to be wrestled in an entirely new format. [B]EW:[/B] That's right. It's the Four Corners of Funk match! [B]YE:[/B] The rules to the Four Corners of Funk are as simple as they are ridiculous; the only wrestling moves allowed during the match are those holds, throws, and strikes that would not seem out of place on the dancefloor. [B]EW:[/B] And that music means that the challengers are coming in! [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/dancecyborg.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/drfunkenstein.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] Looks like they mean business! Backstage word has it that outside the wrestling ring the heroic Chris Funk and the malign – if intermittently competent – Doktor Funkenstein have a long-standing rivalry regarding the rule of the world. [B]EW: [/B]Wait, he's really a superhero? [B]YE: [/B]Yeah, that's pretty much what I said when I heard. Here come their opponents, anyway... [CENTER]FOUR CORNERS OF FUNK MATCH [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/ChrisFunk.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/pantsboy.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/dancecyborg.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/drfunkenstein.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] This should definitely be interesting. It's Pants Boy and the Dancebot to start. Dancebot with quick footwork there, backflip over the Moonwalk Elbow and whips Pants to the turnbuckle... [B]EW: [/B]The Moonwalk Elbow? [B]YE:[/B] Well, what else would you call it? Dancebot on the ropes here... oh, he's doing Mashed Potato on Pants Boy's head! [B]EW: [/B]The full ten! [B]YE:[/B] Down and off. Pants Boy falls forward... no! Breakdance legsweep! Both men dive for their partners! Tag is made and all four men are in the ring! [B]EW:[/B] This should be awesome! [B]YE:[/B] Charge... no, stopped at the last moment. Chris Funk hits the Travolta pose... so does Funkenstein! Faceoff by Pants Boy and the Dancebot... [B]EW: [/B]DOUBLE TRAVOLTA POSE! [B]YE:[/B] What in the world is going on here? [B]EW:[/B] They're just dancing! [B]YE:[/B] No! Night Fever Uppercut by Funk sends Funkenstein reeling! [B]EW:[/B] He can't stop the funk! [B]YE:[/B] Wow, that joke's getting old... Wait, Funkenstein just pulled something out of his jacket. Irish Whip by the Dancebot sends Funk to the corner... [B]EW: [/B]Wait, what? [B]YE:[/B] Doktor Funkenstein just used some kind of device to drop a disco ball on Chris Funk's head! [B]EW:[/B] Is that legal? [B]YE: [/B]I don't think so... no, Chris Roberts isn't allowing it. DQ victory for the Heroes! [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/AndrewMcMenamin.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/cheerleadermish.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/BobbyStPierre.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/MaxxHero.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/themaniac.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] O...K... Looks like the Gentlemen's Club have a new member... [B]EW:[/B] Which is... interesting. Does she count as a gentleman? [B]YE: [/B]Do any of them? [B]EW:[/B] Point. [B]McMenamin: [/B]Felicitations to any and all deserving souls who happen to be within earshot... if any there be, indeed. I must say I rather doubt it. Still, for the moment it suits our purposes to be here. I'd like to address, if I may, the current Tag Team Champions, whatever their true identities. They claim one identity, we claim another. But, as all devotees of the intellectual pursuits know, the cat is either alive or dead; Los Muertos Rudos are either the One Percenters, or they are not. And to collapse the waveform, and kill the cat, wrestling offers us a single simple solution. A match where, if you lose, you must unmask... Think about it, chaps. Life can still be made very unpleasant for you. [CENTER]BWA Tag Titles [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/Masked%20Percent/bangernegro.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/Masked%20Percent/trellclassic.jpg[/IMG] © w/ [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/Masked%20Percent/antithesisranger.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/tyleridol.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/hydeA.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] This should be one of the more competitive matches for the tag titles we've seen recently. Looks like... y'know what, screw it. Looks like Trell Classic and Hyde Hill to start. Hill's the more technically sound of the two, but you really can't argue with Trell's ability to get into a brawl. [B]EW:[/B] Eh? Matt Classic's a talented grappler, not a fighter? [B]YE: [/B]Now you decide to play along? [B]EW:[/B] Sure, why not? [B]YE: [/B]I'm going to get a drink. It's your turn to call it. [B]EW:[/B] Aw, man. OK, um, Hyde Hill gets a thingy applied... shaken loose by Matt Classic who goes for a bodyslam... Legdrop... Classic picks Hyde back up, Hyde armdrags clear, tag made, in comes Idol. Forearm from Classic – no! Idol ducks, powerbomb, taunting Abismo Negro... Tags back out. Hill in for a sharpshooter, Classic kicks him clear, backdrop and tags out to Negro who's in with a clothesline. Powerbomb on Negro, I guess to pay Idol back. To the top rope – Abismo Comes Tumbling Down! Nasty stuff and Idol's back in without a tag, cut off by Yellow Ranger, HUSTLE driver by the Ranger! All five men in the ring, the ref looks confused, clog kick from Hyde lays out the Ranger, Idol powerbombs Negro – no! Cut off by the Forearm from Classic! And another Forearm from Classic on Hyde! One, two, three! [B]YE:[/B] Back. You know, that was surprisingly competitive. [B]EW:[/B] Yeah, I enjoyed it. Apart from scrambling to remember what things are called. [B]YE:[/B] Serves you right. Next up, ladies and gentlemen, turn your attention to the big screen. We've another pre-recorded insert, paid for by the Gentlemen's Club... [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/AndrewMcMenamin.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/cheerleadermish.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/BobbyStPierre.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/MaxxHero.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/themaniac.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [I]The camera opens out onto an expensive restaurant. The Gentlemen's Club toast the camera.[/i] [B]St. Pierre:[/B] I think I'm going to frame Yellow Ranger Hussy's mask once we've taken it from him. [B]Hero:[/B] Ebay, man. Ebay. [B]Maniac:[/B] My gazpacho is cold. [B]Hero:[/B] Oh, God, it's a Red Dwarf spoof... [B]St Pierre:[/B] No, he just is that dumb. [B]McMenamin:[/B] Albeit his intellect can be detected only through the most advanced scientific instruments, nonetheless he still possesses a title. Through him the Club can leverage, according to my accountant, no less than forty per cent of BWA profits, correctly handled. And I will be handling the situation entirely correctly, don't worry about that. [B]Hero:[/B] So... we just hope he holds on to the belt? [B]McMenamin:[/B] Dear me, no. Hope has little to do with it. Our main course tonight – as the Maniac's main course at Disorganised Mayhem – is freshly grilled snake... [CENTER]BWA Canadian Championship [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/themaniac.jpg[/IMG] © w/ [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/AndrewMcMenamin.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/davethesnakehogg.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] Well, this should be... interesting. Dave charges- [B]EW:[/B] SPECIAL BUS SLAM! [B]YE:[/B] One, two, three! [B]EW:[/B] Poor Dave. Hey, look, your telly's come back on. [B]YE:[/B] Good grief... Jimmy's getting more and more active backstage... [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/edisrawpseudorudo.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jamescasey.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]Comedor:[/B] So how are they? [B]Casey:[/B] Hmm? [B]Comedor: [/B]Adult brains. I know they're less tender, and the juices seem to have... declined... but... [B]Casey:[/B] Oh, that. My investigations were interrupted. [B]Comedor:[/B] Wait... that was what you were planning for Java? [B]Casey:[/B] He defeated Samoa Joe, but he himself is a perfectly unremarkable physical specimen. It has to be some tactical nous he possesses, and despite my victories to date, I feel that adding it to my own would be... useful. [B]Comedor:[/B] Useful, right. And taking someone out wasn't part of the question? [B]Casey:[/B] As in, his death? [B]Comedor:[/B] Yeah. [B]Casey:[/B] Babies without brains also die, you know. [B]Comedor:[/B] ... Wait, no ****? [B]Casey:[/B] I'm a doctor. I know these things. [B]Comedor:[/B] These conversations are weird. [CENTER]Prime Time Challenge [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/cameronbrogden.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/mrcanada.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/captainpanix.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/astilbwa.jpg[/IMG] w/ [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/dawn.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE: [/B]I still think a pirate and a samurai on a tag team is pretty much copyright infringement. [B]EW:[/B] I think it's awesome. It's like an OMGsplosion. [B]YE:[/B] Yes, that's pretty much my point. [B]EW:[/B] What? Name me the promotion that has a tag team like that. [B]YE:[/B] Well, they don't actually exist per se – you know what, skip it. From what I can make out, Prime asked to have Mr Canada as a partner against any rival team. [B]EW:[/B] So is Mr Canada in the Prime Time Players now? [B]YE: [/B]No clue. Panix starting off against Mr Canada, which of course leaves Astil and Prime as a very possible fight later in the match. [B]EW:[/B] Mr Canada doesn't look scared, considering how Panix has been acting of late. [B]YE: [/B]Yes, this is the man who beat Odin with his wife on the line. Panix in with a strong forearm, whip to the ropes, Canada comes back with a spinwheel kick, both men rise and stand off... [B]EW:[/B] Oh, boy. This should be great! [B]YE:[/B] Lock up by Canada, transitions smoothly into a headlock, back suplex by Panix and Canada uses his momentum to flip through and land on his feet. Clothesline attempt by Canada ducked, Panix off the ropes, shoulder block knocks Canada down... I have to agree. [B]EW:[/B] And Prime and Astil are just going to make it more impressive! [B]YE:[/B] Speaking of which, Panix tags in Astil, Astil to the top, missile dropkick dodged by Canada. STF attempt... no, Astil rolls with it, kicks Canada into the ropes, small package on the rebound one two – no! Canada kicks out! Armlock, Astil backflips out and comes back with a clothesline... [B]EW:[/B] What's coming next? [B]YE:[/B] Arabian moonsault by Astil hits home, one, two – no! Canada really needs to tag to Prime and to be honest I think that's what Astil's hoping for. Cartwheel into a dropkick but Canada twists clear, bodyslam, Astil slips out, dropkicks Canada- [B]EW:[/B] But Canada made the tag! [B]YE:[/B] Yes indeed and here comes Prime, looking full of energy. Astil catching his breath, Prime measures the ring and- [B]EW: [/B]NO! [B]YE:[/B] Prime just superkicked Canada out of his boots! The whole thing was a setup to get Canada distracted and hurt! [B]EW:[/B] Astil doesn't look happy! [B]YE: [/B]Indeed... here he comes – and here they come! [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/daweasel.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/herrindomina.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/mustbemistaken.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]EW:[/B] Ooh, pileup! [B]YE: [/B]Domina and Tyler cut Panix off. Sledgehammer shots to the back... Ooh. [B]EW: [/B]Is he going to be able to make the lumberjack match tonight? [B]YE:[/B] It's up for speculation – look out! [B]EW:[/B] T-BONE! [B]YE:[/B] Herrin Domina just T-Bone suplexed Panix from the ring through our table! [B]EW:[/B] The table never used to get broken... [B]YE: [/B]War of escalation. Panix is down, Astil is trying to fight off Prime and Mistaken... now Domina in too... Astil just got tossed out of the ring and the Players are going to town on Mr Canada. Sledgehammer shot to the head. Not quite vertical suplex from Mistaken. Domina picks him back up... Dominator! And Prime's on the top turnbuckle... a flying elbow drop! [B]EW:[/B] I don't get it. What's going on? [B]YE:[/B] Prime's going for a microphone. I guess we'll get an explanation. [B]Prime: [/B]So none of you saw this coming? Really? It's like you just... didn't... pay... attention. I told you all, back when this started, that I was ready for the Prime Time. I told you all I was going to model my career on the man who, until I came along, was the greatest of them all. [B]YE: [/B]Oh, God... it's starting to make a sick kind of sense. [B]Prime: [/B]The Showstoppa. The Icon. The Main Event. These were all words that signified the Heartbreak Kid. My childhood idol. But you know what? Now... now not even he is as ready for the Prime Time as me and my Kliq. The torch is ready to be passed, and the tragedy is... Shawn Michaels declined my challenge. He didn't come here. He's scared to be put out to pasture. So I have to take that torch from him myself! [B]EW:[/B] And what better way than to beat up a Canadian technician who uses the Sharpshooter? [B]YE: [/B]I think you have it. [B]Prime: [/B]And that means, Astil Janetty, that as of now I do not care. As of now, goodbye, good luck rediscovering your talent, good luck getting anywhere. That means it's time to destroy another legend. It's time to show the world that anything HBK can do I can do better. Canada – you'll just have to be my honorary Hart. Get a gang together, or we'll just crush you on your own. [CENTER][B]BWA UK CHAMPIONSHIP [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jamescasey.jpg[/IMG] © vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jaffa.jpg[/IMG] LUMBERJACK MATCH Lumberjacks: [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/odin.jpg[/IMG], [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/gringo.jpg[/IMG][/B][/CENTER] YE: [/B]I guess Panix isn't going to make it out as a lumberjack after all. [B]EW:[/B] Arseholes. [B]YE:[/B] Sounds about right. Oh, look. Odin has a chair. [B]EW:[/B] Wow, this totally isn't lopsided. Is Jaffa even standing properly? [B]YE:[/B] Apparently after he'd taken time off with injury inside the last year he didn't want to do it again. He's taken all of this very personally. [B]EW:[/B] Well, wouldn't you? [B]YE: [/B]Absolutely. Casey opens aggressively – dropkick sends Jaffa out of the ring! Odin's onto him – Lex Talionis! [B]EW:[/B] Gringo's coming to make the save! [B]YE:[/B] And a Lex Talionis for Gringo, too. That looked vicious. Odin rolls Jaffa back in... immediate choke by Casey. The ref makes him break it. Casey with a boot to the head... picks Jaffa up... hot shot across the top rope, Jaffa catches himself, big boot from Casey! Jaffa goes down like he was shot. Ric Flair kneedrop from Casey, picks him back up, and a piledriver! One, two, three! [B]EW:[/B] Casey is just sick! He tried to cut the guy's head open last month! [B]YE: [/B]He's got the knife again this month! Someone help! [B]Panix: [/B]AAARRR! [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/captainpanix.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE: [/B]He's here! [B]EW:[/B] Swinging in! [B]YE:[/B] Oh – but Odin was there, cutting off the swing with that steel chair! Panix is down! [B]EW:[/B] He's kind of getting back to his feet... [B]YE:[/B] Yep. Odin and Panix going toe to toe. We just need someone else to intervene... [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/edisrawpseudorudo.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE: [/B]This... was not who I expected. [B]EW:[/B] No, and he's not stopping Casey either! He's helping him! [B]YE:[/B] Another Lex Talionis on Panix staggers him. Odin gestures – OK, what the ****ing **** happened to the lights? [B]EW:[/B] Language! [B]YE:[/B] No, seriously. What the hell? [B]EW:[/B] I dunno, but it's probably a good- oh, there they go. Where the hell is everyone? [B]YE:[/B] Panix still looks ready for a fight, but he's the only one there? I... I guess... that was Disorganised Mayhem, ladies and gentlemen. Please, please don't hold this against us. We'll be back next month...

[G-Prime]

Oh hell yes! Take that Mr Canada!

[darthsiddus2]

*laughs sinisterly* hehehehehe

[Regis]

See, you missed a trick there, boss! You should totally have gone for the Sharpshooter yourself! Hell, if we club together, we can get plane tickets to Montreal! It'll be awesome!

[G-Prime]

'The Torquay Screwjob' has a nice ring to it...

[Phantom Stranger]

The BWA has now outlived four other wrestling companies. If I ever figure out how, I'll let you know.

[darthsiddus2]

:eek:

[Astil]

We're taking ova!

[darthsiddus2]

in the words of Steven Richars........ WE'RE TAKING OVER! very nice though :D

[Phantom Stranger]

[CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/DTFPosters/BWANSA2.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] Prediction Key: Lads Night Out vs. Men of Honour Eight Man Bar Room Brawl Prime Time Players (Prime, Herrin Domina, 'Pretty Amazing' Thomas Tyler, 'Must Be' Mistaken) vs. Canada's Coalition (Mr Canada, Astil, 'World Tour' Tyler Idol, Hyde Hill) The One Percenters vs. George & Lu Lu McAllister Odin vs. Richy G BWA UK Championship Dr James Casey (c) vs. Pirate Panix w/ Dawn Storm

[Regis]

Prediction Key: [B]Lads Night Out[/B] vs. Men of Honour [I]Job-fest ahoy![/I] Eight Man Bar Room Brawl [B]Prime Time Players (Prime, Herrin Domina, 'Pretty Amazing' Thomas Tyler, 'Must Be' Mistaken)[/B] vs. Canada's Coalition (Mr Canada, Astil, 'World Tour' Tyler Idol, Hyde Hill) [I]Just like that has-been Hart, you're done for, Mister Canada. Get out of our ring, because this is our time! Astil, you just don't learn, do you? Keep coming back, and we'll keep beating you! And Tyler Idol, your World Tour stops tonight! Take a tip, and stick with the winning side - you and your monkey.[/I] [B]The One Percenters[/B] vs. George & Lu Lu McAllister [I]Unless the concentrated hideousness of the opposing team knocks them unconscious first.[/I] [B]Odin[/B] vs. Richy G [I]Come on.[/I] BWA UK Championship [B]Dr James Casey (c)[/B] vs. Pirate Panix w/ Dawn Storm [I]The Doc is unstoppable - at least until the boss gets back into the picture, of course.[/I]

[Antithesis]

Lads Night Out vs. [B]Men of Honour[/B] I get the feeling you want to push them to face the One.. err Los Muertos Rudos Eight Man Bar Room Brawl Prime Time Players (Prime, Herrin Domina, 'Pretty Amazing' Thomas Tyler, 'Must Be' Mistaken) vs. Canada's Coalition (Mr Canada, Astil, 'World Tour' Tyler Idol, Hyde Hill) Feud is just starting, and unless someone else shows up to interfere, I figure a double count out or double DQ [B]The One Percenters[/B] vs. George & Lu Lu McAllister Losing the belts now would weaken the program you are trying to build with Los Muertos Rudos. [B]Odin[/B] vs. Richy G Think you have plans for him beyond this match, so you'll feed him Richy G for the time being. BWA UK Championship [B]Dr James Casey[/B] (c) vs. Pirate Panix w/ Dawn Storm His reign of terror has just started, and while I think Panix might win via DQ, there is no point in Casey holding the belt if he isn't interested in winning matches, at least from time to time.

[G-Prime]

[B]Lads Night Out[/B] vs. Men of Honour [I]They may not be able to beat the PTP, but the Men of Honour are another story.[/I] Eight Man Bar Room Brawl [B]Prime Time Players (Prime, Herrin Domina, 'Pretty Amazing' Thomas Tyler, 'Must Be' Mistaken)[/B] vs. Canada's Coalition (Mr Canada, Astil, 'World Tour' Tyler Idol, Hyde Hill) [I]If you're putting together a team to take down the most dominant stable in professional wrestling history, why would you put a guy who's ass I already kicked on the team?[/I] [B]The One Percenters[/B] vs. George & Lu Lu McAllister [I]Because they're the ONE PERCENTERS!!![/I] [B]Odin[/B] vs. Richy G [I]As above, but replace 'ONE PERCENTERS' with 'F'N ODIN!!!'[/I] BWA UK Championship Dr James Casey (c) vs. [B]Pirate Panix[/B] w/ Dawn Storm [I]It's about time he got the title.[/I]

[Hyde Hill]

[B]Lads Night Out [/B]vs. Men of Honour Eight Man Bar Room Brawl Prime Time Players (Prime, Herrin Domina, 'Pretty Amazing' Thomas Tyler, 'Must Be' Mistaken) vs. [B]Canada's Coalition [/B](Mr Canada, Astil, 'World Tour' Tyler Idol, Hyde Hill) [B]The One Percenters [/B]vs. George & Lu Lu McAllister [B]Odin[/B] vs. Richy G BWA UK Championship Dr James Casey (c) vs. [B]Pirate Panix [/B]w/ Dawn Storm

[Hyde Hill]

[QUOTE]If you're putting together a team to take down the most dominant stable in professional wrestling history, why would you put a guy who's ass I already kicked on the team?[/QUOTE] Because me and the tour are a different story plus we got screwed outta the tag titles we want rematch! Cage or iron man plz.

[Phantom Stranger]

[QUOTE=Hyde Hill;541899]Because me and the tour are a different story plus we got screwed outta the tag titles we want rematch! Cage or iron man plz.[/QUOTE] Iron Man? Half the roster can't go ten minutes!

[FINisher]

[quote=Phantom Stranger;541901]Iron Man? Half the roster can't go ten minutes![/quote] I lol'd. That's so true with my roster also in BBW :p

[Phantom Stranger]

[QUOTE=FINisher;541902]I lol'd. That's so true with my roster also in BBW :p[/QUOTE] It'd be frustrating except that, quite frankly, if I started booking long matches chunks of the roster would never appear.

[Hyde Hill]

Did i say iron man? I mean submission match lolz

[Tyler Gadzinski]

[B]Lads Night Out[/B] vs. Men of Honour Eight Man Bar Room Brawl Prime Time Players (Prime, Herrin Domina, 'Pretty Amazing' Thomas Tyler, 'Must Be' Mistaken) vs. [B]Canada's Coalition (Mr Canada, Astil, 'World Tour' Tyler Idol, Hyde Hill)[/B] [B]The One Percenters[/B] vs. George & Lu Lu McAllister [B]Odin [/B]vs. Richy G BWA UK Championship [B]Dr James Casey (c)[/B] vs. Pirate Panix w/ Dawn Storm

[Phantom Stranger]

I'll be working on the show today and tomorrow... get those predictions in!

[Phantom Stranger]

[CENTER][B]BWA No Saints Allowed September 2009 St Luke's Church [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/davidhallettyoungenglishman.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/emma.jpg[/IMG] [/B][/CENTER] [B]Young Englishman:[/B] Welcome back one and all! It looks like being an interesting night tonight, with the undefeated champion facing off against a man who bested his leader Odin in a horrendous match. We've also got an interview lined up with recent arrival Doktor Funkenstein and Jimmy's promised us a host of video reports. [B]Emma Whatever: [/B]Plus the Lad's Night Out and the One Percenters are both back in action after quite a gap. [B]YE:[/B] Indeed! A number of the BWA original crew are on board tonight along with some of the best of our more recent additions. This promises to be a real humdinger of- [B]EW:[/B] 'Humdinger'? [B]YE: [/B]Yes, humdinger, a real- [B]EW:[/B] That sounds stupid. [B]YE:[/B]... One day these intros will work. Up first, the Lad's Night Out do battle with Men of Honour. [B]EW:[/B] When you put it like that, the LNO sound like arseholes. [B]YE: [/B]How appropriate. [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/earlbreese.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/tomlynch.jpg[/IMG] w/ [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/bigdave.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/DJStorm.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/petedavis.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jacobserfling.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]EW: [/B]Man, Men of Honour are way outnumbered. [B]YE:[/B] Got that right. The LNO have been known for using the numbers game and any other trick they can dream up all this time, though, so really – is it that surprising? [B]EW: [/B]Not much surprises me with these two. [B]YE:[/B] Four. Serfling starts with Breese, and the two lock up, Breese drunkenly collapses which sends Serfling to the canvas too. Big Dave causing a ruckus on the outside, Storm vaults to the rope, legdrop on Serfling! [B]EW:[/B] Bad start for the good guys... [B]YE:[/B] Diving shoulder block by Davis cuts Storm off, and now Lynch is in, Lynch and Breese grab Davis, DDDDT! [B]EW: [/B]Gotta find a better name for that... [B]YE:[/B] Tell me about it. Lynch and Breese grabbing Serfling now, whip to the ropes, was that seriously meant to be a 3D? [B]EW:[/B] Hope not, but depressingly, I think it was. [B]YE:[/B] Whatever it was, it was still pretty effective. Big Dave and the ref are STILL arguing, crap knows what about. So can they go for a pin? [B]EW:[/B] Oh, God... [B]YE:[/B] Stereo figure-four leg locks... these guys have way too much ego. Big Dave down from the apron leaving the ref, finally, to assess the situation. And really, you have to feel sorry for Jacob and Pete, there basically wasn't a moment of this match where their opponents weren't cheating. [B]EW:[/B] Hey, the big screen's coming on... [B]YE:[/B] Must be the first of Jimmy's broadcasts. [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jaffa.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [i]It's not easy to tell where this is, but one thing's for certain; that's Jaffa on the floor, and he's hurting, blood everywhere matting his face, his hair. Slurping sounds come from just off camera, and Jimmy pans up... [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jamescasey.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/edisrawpseudorudo.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/odin.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] El Comedor and Dr Casey are licking their fingers clean, while Odin smiles, looking on from the side.[/i] [B]Odin:[/B] Make your peace with this image, you wrestlers, you valets, you fans. Any of you might be the next. [i]He claps El Comedor on the shoulder.[/i] [B]Odin:[/B] My family grows, and grows strong... [B]YE:[/B] Jesus. [B]EW:[/B] Yeah. [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/Masked%20Percent/antithesisranger.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/Masked%20Percent/bangernegro.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/Masked%20Percent/trellclassic.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] Here come the Tag Champions again. I'm still more than a little ticked off with this whole dumb mask thing, but I guess if the alternative is that stupid probation that the One Percenters have been under... [B]EW:[/B] Yeah, that's a thought; how're they gonna cope if someone pulls shenanigans tonight? They only dodged getting fired the last time by fluke! [B]Abismo Negro: [/B]Alright, listen up. I'm only gonna say this once. [B]Matt Classic:[/B] I still say we shouldn't have to do this. [B]Abismo Negro:[/B] Goddammit... anyway, McMenamin? You've got this idea in your head that we're the One Percenters. You have this mask match idea. Alright, says I. Let's see what we can do about that. [B]Yellow Ranger HUSTLE: [/B]Seems to us these Percenters have a speciality match. And that that's what caused them all their problems. [B]Matt Classic:[/B] On account of you being too keen to get them fired by cheating. [B]Abismo Negro:[/B] So here's the deal. You get your mask match, only it's a Biker's Bonfire match. Once you've been through it, too, I guess you can't try and force people out for wrestling in it. [B]Matt Classic: [/B]And we think we can handle it as well as the Percenters. [B]Yellow Ranger HUSTLE:[/B] Uh – last time- [B]Abismo Negro:[/B] Last time we had to deal with a bunch of other guys too, all right? [B]Matt Classic:[/B] OK, OK. [B]Abismo Negro:[/B] So get ready, boys, because next month you go through Hell at Halloween! [B]YE:[/B] Wow – that should be an amazing match! [B]EW:[/B] No question. Oop – screen's on again. [B]YE: [/B]Goddammit, Jimmy... what now? [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/cameronbrogden.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/daweasel.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/herrindomina.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/mustbemistaken.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [i]The camera is being pulled along toward a Torquay nightspot, whose logo gets VERY prominently displayed, by 'Pretty Amazing' dragging the cameraman. Beyond, you can see referee Chris Roberts in a Prime hammerlock as the group head toward the door.[/i] [B]Tyler:[/B] Pete's sake, Jimmy, don't make me hurt you, just film it, alright? Prime: You know the score, right, ref? Bar room brawl, one fall? [B]Roberts: [/B]OK, OK, sure... [B]Domina: [/B]There's four of 'em in there. It's perfect match conditions. [B]Prime:[/B] OK, let's go. [i]They hit the doors, and find the bar busy, but not so busy that they can't see: [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/mrcanada.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/tyleridol.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/hydeA.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/astilbwa.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] three of whom are drinking while Astil looks to console Mr Canada. Prime takes off in a charge, stepping from chair to table and wiping the line-up out with a massive plancha. There's a number of panicked yells and the other Players charge forward into the melee. Violence breaks out – along with chairs – in earnest for some time. Gradually Prime and his band begin to take the advantage, though that's briefly taken back after 'Pretty Amazing' is nearly crushed by the Weight of an Idol from the bartop. Finally, however, another voice is heard:[/i] [B]Darth Sid:[/B] What the hell? [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/DarthSiddius.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/revenant.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [i]Darth Sid & His Creepy Mute Buddy (TM) charge into the fray, attacking the Prime Time Players and drawing a wildly anarchic DQ victory for the Players. Silence falls over the bar after Roberts makes his declaration.[/i] [B]Astil:[/B] ...You actually brought a ref? [i]The video feed ends.[/i] [B]YE: [/B]There is no way we are not getting sued after that. [B]EW:[/B] Yeah, like we have the money for it to be worthwhile. [B]YE:[/B] We can hope that's enough to stop them. OK, next up... well, actually, next up I have to refer you back to the big screen. I conducted an interview last week with BWA newcomer and, by his own lights, supervillain Doktor Funkenstein... [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/davidhallettyoungenglishman.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/drfunkenstein.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] So, Doktor Funkenstein- [B]Funkenstein: [/B]Ze correct appelation is 'Herr Doktor Funkenstein'? [B]YE:[/B] Wait, did you have this accent before? [B]Funkenstein:[/B] Nein. [B]YE: [/B]I'm going to hate this, aren't I? [B]Funkenstein:[/B] You are known as one who prefers the more, shall we say, commonplace in wrestling. On discovering that a rostermate consumes the brains of babies you were terrified. I am the man who created the Soviet Dancebot 5000. It's only natural that your sheer mundanity will be terrified and compromised. You may embrace these feelings. [B]YE:[/B] The accent went away! [B]Funkenstein:[/B] Please tell me that this is not the caliber of question I can expect throughout. [B]YE: [/B]Uh- [B]Funkenstein:[/B] No real matter. You will wish to ask why I appear to bear ill will toward Chris Funk, as if it is not obvious that such as we will have been nemeses for years. His actions foiled me when I set out to make Austria dance itself to death. His was the hand that ended the Disco Uprising in Manhattan. [B]YE:[/B] Well, yes, but- [B]Funkenstein:[/B] You will also perhaps wonder how it is that I came by a Soviet-era Dancebot; I alone still recall the co-ordinates for the Stalinate Dance Camps, and was able to rescue him from a life of deactivation. [B]YE:[/B] I see, but- [B]Funkenstein: [/B]Lastly, you will be aware that I have a propensity for interrupting questions with the correct answer. This is simply down to my being far more intelligent than you. [B]YE:[/B] I give up. [CENTER] [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/antithesis.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/wallbanger.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/trell.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] OH COME ON THEY'RE WEARING THE SAME CLOTHES! [B]Trell:[/B] As who, man? [B]YE:[/B] GAAH! [B]Wallbanger:[/B] Relax, man. We've got good news. Well, good for you. [B]YE:[/B] Which is? [B]Wallbanger:[/B] You know how McMenamin's been pissed off with you? Well, he's about to have more to worry about. [B]Antithesis:[/B] OUR PROBATION IS OVER! [B]Trell:[/B] Damn right. Why d'you think we asked for another match? Bring our opponents down here, let's have some fun! [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/wallbanger.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/trell.jpg[/IMG] w/ [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/antithesis.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/GeorgeMcAlister.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/LuLu.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE:[/B] This could get interesting and get interesting fast. [B]EW:[/B] I guess the shackles are off. [B]YE:[/B] No question. Trell starting off with Lu Lu and she's going to have to use speed here. [B]EW:[/B] Well, she can cheat now without getting them fired. [B]YE:[/B] I'm not sure that's the best strategy either, really. Lu Lu with a dropkick, standing moonsault... Trell powers that over into a small package, one, two – no! Lu Lu out, roundhouse stiletto heel staggers Trell and the tag's made, both McAllisters using the five count for Total Elimination! [B]EW: [/B]That was pretty cool. [B]YE:[/B] Wallbanger in with a double clothesline to even the odds, and – oh, no... [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/earlbreese.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/tomlynch.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/bigdave.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/DJStorm.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]EW: [/B]Here comes the LNO! [B]YE:[/B] Straight at the One Percenters, and this is going to be a DQ win for the Percenters. Look at that brawl... [B]Lynch: [/B]You think they've bought it? [B]EW: [/B]What the hell does that mean? [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/odin.jpg[/IMG] vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/richyg.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]YE: [/B]This promises to be the toughest challenge yet for the Welsh Wonder. Odin's standing there stoically, Richy G backs up, off the ropes, diving shoulderblock doesn't exactly worry Odin. Chop block goes wrong, too. To the top rope – missile dropkick – hey, Odin had to take a step back! [B]EW:[/B] Well, that's something. [B]YE: [/B]Big boot by Odin! This match just turned around in a hurry! [B]EW:[/B] It was nice while it lasted. [B]YE:[/B] Chokeslam? No – just a toss into the turnbuckles! Richy staggers forward – DDT! Odin rolls over for the cover... one, two, three! [B]Panix: [/B]ARRR! [B]YE:[/B] And that sound means it's time to look up above and watch the number one contender swing on down... [CENTER][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/captainpanix.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/DawnStorm.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [B]Panix:[/B] How're ye all farin', me hearties? Aye, I'm grand as well, just grand. Finally me troubles with the big Viking lummox are done, and by the end of tonight I promise ye – I'll be champion. All the booty a pirate could want, am I right? [CENTER][B]BWA UK Championship [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/jamescasey.jpg[/IMG] (c) vs. [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/captainpanix.jpg[/IMG] w/ [IMG]http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm75/trenchcoatbrigand/destinedtofail/DawnStorm.jpg[/IMG][/B][/CENTER] [B]YE: [/B]We just saw the man Panix beat as part of his path to get here totally destroy another member of the roster. You have to remember that this is the kind of ability Pirate Panix has been able to tap into. [B]EW:[/B] At the same time, Casey's still unbeaten. [B]YE:[/B] You've got to figure he's building up a hell of an ego. [B]EW:[/B] I think that'll strike a chord with people who know Casey, yeah. [B]YE:[/B] Circle and a lockup to start, Panix shifts position, Russian leg sweep takes Casey down, quick cover, one – no! Champion kicking out strong there, both to their feet and circling again... [B]EW:[/B] This could take a while, huh? [B]YE:[/B] Or be over in seconds. Casey closes in, Panix ducks clear, punch blocked by Casey and a headbutt! [B]EW: [/B]Panix is staggered! [B]YE:[/B] Casey hits a high knee to Panix's back, to the ropes and a diving elbow to the back again. Another – no, Panix rolls clear, comes back with a clothesline and wipes Casey out! [B]EW:[/B] Arr! [B]YE:[/B] Panix picks Casey up, goes for the bodyslam, Casey slips clear and an atomic drop – Panix vaults forward, off the ropes, a dropkick to knock the champion back down. [B]Panix:[/B] ARRR! [B]YE:[/B] Casey finds his feet again, Panix in close, armbar into a hammerlock by Pirate Panix, Casey flips clear, twists, knee to the gut – powerbomb by the champ! [B]EW:[/B] Did that look familiar to you? [B]YE: [/B]Huh? Casey picks Panix back up, whip to the ropes, spinwheel kick delivered by the Pirate in response. Panix goes to the top rope, waiting for Casey to rise – double axe handle staggers the champion! Panix in for a suplex, Casey slips clear at the back, and- [B]EW:[/B] Is... is that... [B]YE:[/B] That's the Jaffarack! Casey has Panix in the Jaffarack! [B]EW:[/B] What does that mean? [B]YE:[/B] What do you think? Panix looks to be in pain and... yes, he's tapped! He's tapped! [B]EW:[/B] Aw. [B]YE: [/B]Casey turns the Jaffarack into a powerbomb to put an exclamation point on it. Looks like... oh, no. [B]EW:[/B] He's got that knife again! [B]YE:[/B] Yes – oh, thank God. Dawn just nailed Casey from behind with a chair! The buxom buccaneer just saved her husband! [B]EW: [/B]Whew! [B]YE:[/B] Heaven knows what this means for our next show – but one thing's for sure, the Biker's Bonfire returns! Stay tuned!