Pseudo Posted April 28, 2009 Share Posted April 28, 2009 Hey guys. I'm going to be starting my first dynasty ever here. It will hopefully be entertaining, but I'm also going into this as a relatively inexperienced guy who knows just enough about TEW to be dangerous. Please give me feedback on shows. I'd like to get better at booking. And please forgive any errors or gaps in knowledge of the Cornellverse. I'm picking this up as I go. And while I am definitely inspired by James Casey's MAW Dynasty, hopefully this will not be a ripoff of it. --- "Well at least you take that mask off to eat," Rip said. Even with it off, people still stared. Rip figured Avatar'd gotten used to that ages ago, though. "How've you been?" "Old. Gettin' older. Eat some of these fries, I don't want 'em." He shoved the plate towards Rip. "Sure," Rip said. He didn't eat the fries. "Listen, I hear you're looking for work." "Yeah. Lookin' for a babysitter for your nursery?" He sucked some ketchup off one of his fingers. Rip's temper flared up. "I was looking to give an old friend a job and pick up some talent and a booker at the same time. You going to be an ******* about it?" "Old friend? Rip, we worked together back in Texas but that was ages ago. You made it big, I went south, and that was that. This is the first I've heard from you in, what, over thirty years?" "There's just not that many of the guys from that far back still in the business these days. "Well when the Geriatric Wrestling Federation opens it'll be a great big reunion." Rip laughed. "Yeah, well until then how about coming to work with MAW? You could teach these the boys a thing or two. I was scheduling the matches and letting them work the rest out themselves but it's turning into a mess. There's a lot of enthusiasm, but most of them decided to work as heels, nobody's coordinating angles, and I'm sick of the arguments over match outcomes." "So instead of booking it yourself you suck in a desperate old man looking for work? You're sick, Chord." Avatar grinned. "Listen, I got no problem working for you, but I don't know a thing about booking." Chord shrugged. "I'm not in this for the money. I'm in it to teach these guys, give them some momentum for the rest of their careers, and put on some good matches for the local wrestling fans. I know that you know your way around inside the ring. We'll use that, and we'll get you used to life outside the ring. You gotta give up that mask sometime. These bodies don't last forever." Avatar went quiet. He was done with his burger and was putting the mask back on. He finished fastening it. "Yeah." "Yeah to what?" "All of it." --- "Hey McManus, you hear anything about this Avatar guy?" Valentine asked. There was a lot of chatter after the night's matches. Rip had let them know that come the Invitational there was going to be a change-up in the way the fed ran. Avatar, this old-school worker that spent most of his career in small promotions in Mexico, was going to be working some matches and doing booking. "Apart from what Rip said?" McManus was pulling on a dark blue sweatshirt after changing out of his working clothes. Out of all of MAW's workers, Riley McManus was the most well-liked. He was quiet, a solid worker, and for a young guy knew a lot about the industry. "Yeah. Is he an ******* or what?" Antonio said. "Don't know." McManus laced up his shoes while the others listened. "I only read about him in this book I had about the history of luchadorian wrestling, and it only mentioned him." "He's a ****ing luchadore? Christ. Just what we need. Some old man breaking his hip during a show doing some ****ing spinning backflips or some ****." The guys laughed. "Nah, he's not a luchadore. They promoted him as an American wrestler pitting his American style of wrestling against the Mexican luchadore. He mainly worked as a heel and got a lot of heat whenever the Mexicans were real pissed at us. And I guess he was tight with El Patron." "Who?" "Jesus, Antonio, learn something about the business for godssakes," Valentine said. "And this is a little bit weird, well not in Mexico, but he wears a mask," McManus said. He finished putting his working clothes in his duffle bag. "A mask? Does he fight crime, too?" "Shut the **** up, Antonio." --- "What is this, Rip?" Avatar had Chord on the phone. "I got the roster and your scheduling notes." "Those are good guys. What's your problem?" "My problems not with any of the guys, Rip. You have me listed as a main eventer." "You got the skills. You can bring some heat and help these guys and the fed out." "It's just gonna be embarassing, is what it is. An old man going toe to toe with these young bucks?" "An old man who's got more experience and, frankly, more ring and mic skills than most of them. You want to work ringside, then that's fine. Just say the word and I'll make the change. But as long as you're wrestling you're going to be on the top of the card until I say otherwise." "Yeah. Yeah, fine." "Another thing. Did you see my notes about Antonio and Valentine?" "I'm not gonna play favorites, Rip." "I'm not asking you to play favorites. They've got talent and I want to make sure they get some momentum." "I know you took these guys under your wing, but I'm not going to put them over a better worker." "Just do what I tell you to do, Avatar." Rip hung up. After a few seconds of dial tone, Avatar slammed down the phone. --- Coming up: Scheduling for the Rip Chord Invitational Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SWF2K9 Posted April 28, 2009 Share Posted April 28, 2009 "And this is a little bit weird, well not in Mexico, but he wears a mask," McManus said. He finished putting his working clothes in his duffle bag. "A mask? Does he fight crime, too?" "Shut the **** up, Antonio." I actually found this funny, Very good, almost as good as my USPW diary... ok this is 1000000000000000000000000000000000000X better... But try using colour Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pseudo Posted April 28, 2009 Author Share Posted April 28, 2009 Thank you! I'll give color a try. I'm very badly color blind, so it didn't really occur to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praguepride Posted April 28, 2009 Share Posted April 28, 2009 Very solid start. Great job for a first and definitly setting it in a different tone from Casey's. It wasn't a hang up now but might potentially be in the future, but you might want to use colors or tags to indicate who's talking. If you don't want to, that's fine too, but just keep that in mind when you start writing complicated dialogues that it's easy to get lost when us ADD fans start reading Be careful about pushing your avatar though. Some readers find it cheap when a writer creates a Marty Sue and showers gold and women and accolaides on them. In my next diary, I plan on using Tigerkinney's "Charles Rainer" as a good example of a solid, believable push for a user character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nedew Posted April 28, 2009 Share Posted April 28, 2009 Fantastic, good, proper storytelling. The humour was smartly done when used, the characterisations already look great. Is practically film-esque. Also, colour doesn't bother me in the slightest. I'm more bothered with the words on the page rather than what colour they are - presentation only comes into play for me if it's unreadable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Stranger Posted April 29, 2009 Share Posted April 29, 2009 Also, colour doesn't bother me in the slightest. I'm more bothered with the words on the page rather than what colour they are - presentation only comes into play for me if it's unreadable. Very this. So many people use the yellow text and I have to select it to read it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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