Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

Neoteros · May 16, 2020

Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

Chapter 1: D-Generation Xanax

My name is Togashi Tomoya; I would be your average high school student, if I were going to school like everyone else, but I haven't done so in quite a while. At first, it was because I'd begun walking the lonely path of the hikikomori, but now, it's because of something else. There aren't many things that can make a hikikomori leave their bedroom, but the arson attack on Kyoto Animation's Studio 1 that took place last year, that was one of them. Thinking of all those cute sketches of all those moe girls, burned to a crisp, no - I could not stand it.

What to do, though? While talking to one of my fellow hikikomori comrades, puroresu aficionado Matsuda Masaya, we came up with an idea we thought was quite good, a one-shot charity event featuring young women in cosplay duking it out on the ring. A few acts of blackmail and hacking later - never underestimate a hikikomori's weaponized autism - we were able to hold our event in Kyoto. The event was a success and, while we had to abandon the Haruhi Suzumiya and K-ON! seifuku due to pressure and threats from Kyoto Animation, we nonetheless collected enough money and generated enough interest to turn our one-shot charity event into a professional wrestling promotion, Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu.

With 5SSW being a thing, and a big thing at that, we just can't ape their product and hope to survive, but we didn't want to do it anyway. Our aim, is to become the closest thing to a live anime there was, there is, and there will ever be. ZEN? Yeah, they're on the right path, but while they may be men, they're not men of culture. There is a serious lack of tsundere in their repertoire of gimmicks, after all. And none of the people under their employ has ever been turned into a Nendoroid, either.

Now excuse me, my slash Sound! Euphonium doujinshi isn't going to finish itself.

OOC: being a n00b, I will be using this thread by foolinc as a guide, more or less. I know that, over there, I said I would've given Europe a try, but there's a serious lack of female wrestlers over there, in the 2020 version of the Cornellverse at least.

D-Lyrium · May 16, 2020

You had me at lucharesu!

You kinda lost me with the weeabo stuff, but I'm still here.

Genking · May 16, 2020

but while they may be men, they're not men of culture

Alright, I'm in.

Neoteros · May 16, 2020

Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

Chapter 2: Homura Did Nothing Wrong

At the end of the day, our product did not differ much, at first glance, from that of ZEN, with only a couple details being different: where ZEN had male and female talent, we were to focus only on the women and, where ZEN's alignment divide was modeled after the técnico/rudo split common in lucha libre, BMP was to have a face/heel split not too dependent on the kind of moves on display. The Three Ring Circus match focus and Highlights angle focus was, of course, inspired by the three episode rule - you shall not drop an anime before the third episode. Just think about what would've happened, had people dropped Puella Magi Madoka Magica before the end of the third episode, I wouldn't have been able to masturbate to those drawings on nozomi.la depicting the bloody, disembodied, severed head of

[The next few lines of text in Mr. Togashi's diary were mercifully deleted by the editor, in order to spare the readers a fate not that dissimilar from that of the average protagonist of a H. P. Lovecraft short story; in case of loss of sanity, roll the nearest d20 and hope for the best - in case of an unsuccessful roll, pray to your Great Old One of choice.]

But a product is nothing, without wrestlers to peddle it to the unwashed masses of Japanese otaku we're going to target. A quick search of unemployed female wrestlers under the age of 25, made possible by Matsuda's pals in the yakuza, resulted in the discovery of a dozen such people. Two of them seem to stand out: Miyoshi Emiko, who Matsuda described as an "amazing babyface" that might turn out to be "a marketing dream" and, on the heel front, the "easily marketable" Spider Isako.

We contact most of those wrestlers and, perhaps due to the aforementioned pals in the yakuza, we get our first replies only a day later - four of them, to be exact, enough to sign our first pair of faces, and our first pair of heels. Now, let's see... Matsuda-san, what gimmick do you think they would fit best?

Okubo Asami, heel... looking intense there, young lady. Judo experience, incorporates martial arts throws into her repertoire... yeah, a Martial Artist gimmick will suit her quite well, and we can't have a real life fighting anime without at least one down to earth, serious antagonist character. Then there's our main babyface, Miyoshi Emiko... girl looks almost offensively cute, and what's that, Matsuda-san? She's a bit of a motor mouth, you say? Okay, the Happy-Go-Lucky gimmick seems made for her.

On to our next pair. Exhibit #3, Mochizuki Kichi; 19 years old, fiery red hair, a high-flying heel. She seems to have a knack for the eldritch and weird, if we'll be able to sign Spider Isako she could be her terrifying henchwoman, I guess... wait. Fiery red hair, fire... a henchwoman who likes to set things on fire a little bit too much? A Pyromaniac gimmick might work, we could always turn her into a Punk if it doesn't.

The last one for today, Genda Nami: dark skin, white hair, she already has the anime heroine look down. High-flying face with a penchant for hit and run tactics, she has charisma and sex appeal for days, too. The sexy face to Miyoshi-san's cute face? Maybe, Matsuda-san, maybe. And no, I'm not making her play a Degenerate, that's what you are in real life. A Thrill Seeker though, if there's anyone who could go against a pyromaniac for the lulz, it'd be her. That's it!

Enough for today Matsuda-san, maybe the other vict- I mean, wrestlers, will contact us tomorrow.

OOC: Guys? How do I make images show on my posts without having to click on them? And is there anyone you'd like to see the full profile of, aside from my planned top draws?

Neoteros · May 17, 2020

<div style="text-align:center;">Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess Chapter 3: Early Installment Weirdness</div> The good news, is that we were able to sign the rest of the wrestlers we had our eyes on. The even better news, is that Matsuda-san is asleep right now: this means I can make some slight changes to our plans, if you know what I mean. Change number one, Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu is a bit of a mouthful, don't you think so? That's why I'm going to make Bishōjo Puroresu the name of our company, and Bishōjo Monogatari the name of our show - to be held every week on Sunday, in Kyoto. AKB48 made the concept of a girl group with its own theater work, so why can't the same concept apply to josei puroresu, too? Change number two, Matsuda-san idea of gimmick was not anime enough. While having Miyoshi Emiko and Spider Isako as our top face and our top heel respectively is a good idea, the characters they were going to portray were not exactly otaku bait. I therefore made some improvements to Matsuda-san's original plan, taking into account the peculiar taste of our chosen demographic. For the delight of our readers, here is what I have in mind for them: <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Aki Kamio A promising young joshi worker, Aki Kamio was part of the first ever graduating class of the Hatoyama Dojo. Tiny in stature, Kamio relies heavily on her quickness, especially her many lucha-inspired arm drags and flying headscissor variations, to dizzy her opponents. She has been a regular on the independent circuit since turning professional in 2018 and seems like a lock to eventually turn up in 5SSW.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Asami Okubo Asami Okubo is a young all-rounder from Japan. A decent judo competitor throughout her teens, she often incorporates martial arts throws and joint locks into her repertoire of moves and this gives her a unique style. Still pretty green at this early point in her career, she needs more seasoning to truly realise her potential, although she does appear to realise this given how regularly she works the independent scene.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Emiko Miyoshi Tiny in stature but big in heart, Emiko Miyoshi is a high flying joshi worker who has a strong lucha influence to her ring style. She is particularly noted for her many rana variations, including the Miyoshi Cradle, a rana into a pinfall predicament that she uses as a finisher. A regular sight on the independent scene since 2016, she looks like she could definitely go on to become a strong part of the joshi scene.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Hoshiko Tagawa Hoshiko Tagawa is a young joshi wrestler who is noted for her tenacity and ability when it comes to slick mat wrestling. Her usual M.O. is to use some of her smooth takedown moves to put her opponent on the mat and then zone in on an arm or leg and punish it with wear down holds and submission attempts. Definitely loaded with potential, it would be a surprise if she didn't end up in 5SSW within a few years.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Kaori Takenouchi "Battle Warrior" Kaori Takenouchi is an ultra-tough young joshi competitor. A rugged brawler, she usually turns up to her matches wearing military fatigues and war paint, ready to get down and dirty. Short and stocky, her main offense is to obliterate her opponents with punches, then use her low center of gravity and strength to pull of hard-hitting moves like powerbombs and judo throws.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Kichi Mochizuki A protege of Kit Hatoyama, Kichi Mochizuki is a young joshi worker who is known for her high flying ability. Making her pro debut in early 2019 after being trained at the Hatoyama Dojo, Mochizuki started working the independent scene straight away with the intention of polishing her skills in preparation for a hoped-for move to 5SSW. She uses a graceful swandive senton bomb as her finisher.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Nami Genda Nami Genda is a high flying joshi competitor from Tokyo, Japan. Light on her feet, Genda's style is best described as 'hit and run', using sharp kicks to keep her opponent at bay before taking to the skies with a variety of big moves from the top rope. She really requires more seasoning to remove her recklessness and inconsistency though, as currently she's visibly green and often blows spots - to her credit, she's been working the independent scene hard to try and address this.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Rika Tsujimura Rika Tsujimura was trained at the 5 Star Supreme Wrestling Dojo from where she graduated in 2014. A true all rounder, she is at the very least competent in just about every area of wrestling. She is particularly noted for basing a lot of her attacks around knee strikes, taking advantage of her height (being six feet tall) and flexibility. Since graduating she has been working the independent scene in order to gain experience and is turning into a very decent in-ring hand.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Rina Kasahara A powerful joshi wrestler, Rina Kasahara may be quite short but her thick torso and legs mean she can generate tremendous force and is capable of bulldozing most opponents. A natural heel, she has the vicious bully routine down perfectly. Kasahara loves to blast her opponents with her Spinning Back Fist finisher but also has a truly violent powerbomb into the turnbuckles in her arsenal too. She has been regularly working the independent scene since her pro debut in 2017, and it was be a major surprise if she didn't end up in 5SSW within the next few years.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Spider Isako "Spider" Isako Yoshimatsu is a young joshi worker who is considered a very highly rated prospect. She was trained at the Hatoyama Dojo and impressed her trainer Kit Hatoyama so much that she has remained in close contact post-graduation and is considered one of her proteges. A strike-based worker, Isako likes to light up her opponents with brutal kicks and knee strikes. Also to her benefit is that she has a great look, especially apparent when she comes to the ring in a billowing custom made leather coat, and she comes across as so cool that she seems to be a star in the making. The only question now is how long it'll be until 5SSW make her a contract offer.</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Yayoi Kurmochi One of the new generation of joshi workers coming out of the Hatoyama Dojo, Yayoi Kurmochi graduated from the facility in 2019. A natural babyface due to her cuteness, Kurmochi also has a very audience-friendly high flying style with plenty of aerial acrobatics, not least her Sky Twister Press finisher. She has been working the independent scene since turning professional and hopes to eventually land a job with 5SSW.</div></blockquote> Out of them, five are faces: Aki Kamio, Emiko Miyoshi, Kichi Mochizuki, Nami Genda and Yayoi Kurmochi. The heels, on the other hand, are Asami Okubo, Hoshiko Tagawa, Kaori Takenouchi, Rika Tsujimura, Rina Kasahara and Spider Isako. The main feud will take place between Emiko Miyoshi and Spider Isako, since Matsuda-san identified them as the most marketable people we have; the former is able to play Realistic gimmicks quite well, so she will be our Stock Shoujo Heroine. The latter, on the other hand, is good at Mysterious/Occult gimmicks, so she could play a Dark Magical Girl. Their respective main allies will have to act as their foil: therefore, Kichi Mochizuki will get a Mysterious/Occult gimmick of her own while acting as our heroine's ally, becoming a Magical Girl Warrior, so we need a heel with a Realistic gimmick to juxtapose to her; Asami Okubo looks like a good fit, if we saddle her with an Aloof Dark-Haired Girl gimmick. Something interesting: Aki Kamio and Yayoi Kurmochi could both fit a Cartoonish or Comedy gimmick, and could make for an interesting tag team. Okay, I'm making the former a Chuunibyou and the latter a Cosplay Otaku Girl, while pushing them as a tag team. The name of their finisher writes itself - Kami no Mochi, God's own tasty treat. As their heel couterpart, a duo that might be able to pull off a Swagger gimmick or two: Hoshiko Tagawa as our resident Yakuza, and Rika Tsujimura as her tagalong Japanese Delinquent. Kaori Takenouchi and Rina Kasahara, on the other hand, are both heels that can play a Bad Ass gimmick: the former will be a Ronin, while the latter will be the Heir to the Dojo who hired her. This leaves Nami Genda by herself; she can do Swagger gimmicks, so she'll be our token Bokukko. We are almost ready; we only need a couple of storylines. And what better way to begin a real life anime than a tournament arc? Our main singles belt, Aphrodite's Girdle, will be the prize of a small tournament that will put Asami Okubo against Emiko Miyoshi, Kichi Mochizuki against Spider Isako, and then Emiko Miyoshi against Spider Isako. Our main tag team belt, the Red Thread of Fate, will be the subject of a tournament that will see Kamio & Kurmochi go against Tagawa & Tsujimura as well as Takenouchi & Kasahara. After sucking up a bit to 5SSW and QAW, we are ready to roll.

Neoteros · May 17, 2020

Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

Chapter 4: Pilot Episode

After recruiting a local announcer, a local referee and a local road agent by waving paper money in front of them while they were searching for food at the bottom of a trash bin in whatever back alley they called home, we can finally begin. Only around 50 people are expected to show up in the place we've booked - okay, we basically broke and entered a high school gym, but don't tell the police that - but that's okay. While stalking the least reputable corners of Kyoto, we found three local josei puroresu veterans we could use to put our own talent over, too. And they're even cheaper than a massage parlour "specialist" in Bangkok, as well - don't ask me how I know, okay?

Our opener will put chuunibyou Aki Kamio against 32 year old veteran Mio Takasu - it will end with a clean, decisive finish by pinfall and, in order to help our chuunibyou newbie, it will be both open and scripted, and Aki-chan will be kept strong, too. The following match between 39 year old Angel Takudome - a veteran who seems to be quite good at mentoring new blood - and our own magical girl warrior, Kichi Mochizuki, will be a bit more daring, a high spot bout that will nonetheless be shorter than our previous one, because I'm not ready to pay for a 19 year old's hospital expenses yet. The other tips I gave our hobo road agent for the opener still apply, by the way.

Sick of one-shot bouts featuring one-time deal, washed-out has-been talent? We've got some plot for you. And no, this time I don't mean the kind of plot that begins and stop at chest level. Not yet, at least. It's Spider Isako, our easily marketable dark magical girl (merchandise coming as soon as we can afford it) who will be doing even less wrong than Homura, from now on. She claims to have found Aphrodite's Girdle, a mythological trinket that, once worn, could turn anyone into everyone's favourite waifu, despite the sad reality of that pesky third dimension getting in the way. There's only one problem though, it needs to be bathed in fresh virginal blood to work, and what better way to do so, than defeat a couple marks through a very convenient tournament? She issues an open challenge.

By the way, she'll be reading from cue cards, she's got charisma enough for a newbie but her first name's not Dwayne and her last name's not Johnson.

Back to our rookie-building bouts. Sickeningly wholesome 33 year old Chitose Ariwara will be metaphorically violated by our own aloof dark-haired girl, Asami Okubo, who will make her tap out through a very painful submission hold. And it's time for Emiko Miyoshi to shine: she accepts Spider Isako's challenge! But will anyone else be trapped into the Spider's web? Our main event will put two of our most well-known (according to Matsuda-san's research) stars against each other: ronin Kaori Takenouchi versus bokukko Nami Genda. Okay, we can begin now, for real. How will the show go, and what will be its aftermath?

「つづく」

Neoteros · May 18, 2020

Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

Chapter 4: Pilot Episode - Revengeance

The Kamio/Takasu opener was a decent enough start, if only because Kamio's chuunibyou gimmick was well-received by the crowd - turns out, bellowing phrases like "I have the power of God and anime on my side!" while Naruto running is exactly the kind of thing that gets sweaty basement dwellers hot and bothered, especially if said by a girl with emo hair wearing the height of Hot Topic fashion circa 2007. The crowd didn't seem to like how I used an experienced veteran to put over a total n00b, but they can suck a fat one.

The following bout between Mochizuki and Takudome got a very similar reception, while Spider Isako's reveal of the existence of the fabled Aphrodite's Girdle, and her open challenge, got the crowd going quite nicely. Girl's quite good on the mic for a complete amateur, it seems. Then, Asami Okubo made Chitose Ariwara tap out with a Judo Choke Sleeper, and, judging from the bulge in Matsuda-san's pants, the match went really, really well: the crowd didn't mind that the debuting Okubo defeated the veteran Ariwara, and Okubo's gimmick was very well received, too; deliberately calm and expressionless, Okubo ground Ariwara down with technical holds aplenty, flipping her dark hair in between her most painful moves.

Emiko Miyoshi accepts Spider Isako's challenge; they will face in next week's main event, but it will only be the beginning of their rivalry; either Genda or Mochizuki will have a role in the main event, too - depending on who will prove herself to be the better wrestler according to fans and road agents. Speaking of Nami Genda, our main event - her losing bout against Kaori Takenouchi - ended up being just as well received as our earlier Ariwara/Okubo fight, with her tomboy gimmick faring better than Takenouchi's stoic, powerful modern day ronin character, so she might have a leg up Mochizuki already.

Our event's very positive reception is encouraging, it's only a matter of time before the men of culture on Pixiv will start to lewd our performers. I hope so, at least. For the next week, we will give some of our other wrestlers a chance, as well as staging our first tag team bout, maybe.

Neoteros · May 18, 2020

Welcome back, fellow degenerates. This is an intermission. To celebrate the release of the 1.02 patch, here's a post that will be periodically updated to include all the episodes of Bishoujo Monogatari, subdivided by year, month, and week.

2020

January 1 2 3 4

February 1 2 3

Neoteros · May 18, 2020

Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

Episode 2 - January 2020, Week 2

The opening tag team bout between Kamio & Kurmochi on one hand, and Tagawa & Tsujimura on the other hand, was won by the former team, but Rika Tsujimura turned out to be the best wrestler in the bout by far: while the match got a rating of 34, Tsujimura-san herself got a rating of 41. Looks like we will have to push her a bit if she keeps giving this kind of performance. And now, some plot development: Kurmochi tells Kamio she's had a lot of fun fighting alongside her; she'd like to do it again. And again. And again. UWU

Moving on. An unremarkable bout saw Nami Genda cleanly dispatch Rina Kasahara, but it's the following angle that matters: the defeated Kasahara agrees to team up with modern day ronin Kaori Takenouchi, that had been defeated by Genda a week ago: such a defeat has to be avenged, if Kasahara wants to prove herself worthy of inheriting her father's dojo. The crowd explodes, nothing like a good old tale of blood and honour to spice up a real life anime.

The following match between Asami Okubo and Kichi Mochizuki confirms last week's findings: Okubo-san is a beast for a small promotion such as ours, and the fact that she got a 40 rating while her opponent clumsily stumbled upon a 17 rating shows us that the dark-haired threat fully deserves her victory. Somewhere else, delinquent Tsujimura is approached by yakuza Hoshiko Tagawa, who recruits her after witnessing her losing but impressive bout, promising revenge.

And now, the main event. Emiko Miyoshi and Spider Isako face off for the first time, but none of them is able to gain the upper hand. We will meet again, says the Spider to the innocent heroine, and you will not survive. Exit, pursued by bears. Well, not really but, you get the gist.

After the show, Asami Okubo pulls me aside, telling me that fighting for two Sundays in a row has left her a bit winded. Not a problem, we won't book her next week. Also, Emiko Miyoshi seems to think highly of Aki Kamio, to the point of deeming her a future star. Good. If they keep getting along well, I might put them in some kind of storyline together after both tournament arcs are done; Matsuda-san is suggesting we go the yuri route, but dude's a freak, that's par for the course for him.

The show went well, and the future looks bright; however, Tsujimura is being a bit of a bad influence backstage, could it be that the delinquent gimmick she's been doing is influencing her real life behaviour?

OOC: Anyone got feedback? I'm a n00b, I need it.

boswer91 · May 18, 2020

At first, i was like...what the **** is that ?

But then i started to read the shows and....i liked...no i loved it ! An anime based wrestling company...why no one thought about it before ? Genius !

Looking forward to the Emiko-Spider Feud and what you have planned for us

Neoteros · May 18, 2020

At first, i was like...what the **** is that ?

But then i started to read the shows and....i liked...no i loved it ! An anime based wrestling company...why no one thought about it before ? Genius !

Looking forward to the Emiko-Spider Feud and what you have planned for us

Thanks. Looks like I will have to reward a wrestler by making a slight change in the upcoming show, what happened surprised me. TEW seems to be as good a story generator as Crusader Kings.

Bishōjo Monogatari

Episode 3 - January 2020, Week 3

The backstage had been quiet for two weeks in a row, but third time's the charm, as they say. A very unlucky charm. Or maybe not? See, in kayfabe, Kaori Takenouchi is supposed to be a ronin, hired by Rina Kasahara to act as her right-hand woman in her quest to prove herself worthy as the heir to your average villain's dojo. In real life, however, the tables seem to be flipped: Takenouchi, as much of a badass in person as she is on the ring, has become the de facto leader of the locker room, and she wasted no time in making Kasahara pay for a slight to a fellow worker - the punishment involved yen being exchanged for enough glasses of sake to get even Matsuda-san drunk, and Kasahara actually came out of it a better person.

I may be an evil and sexually degenerate overlord, but I am a just evil and sexually degenerate overlord. Therefore, the show's main event will feature the Kasahara/Takenouchi duo, re-dubbed Bodyguard Crush, take on and defeat the Kamio/Kurmochi duo, re-dubbed Eight-Grader Syndrome. I had planned the weeaboos to win, but Takenouchi impressed me. In the immortal words of legendary wrestler Fred Durst, let's keep on rollin', baby.

The show opens with Bodyguard Crush asking for a shot at the tag team title - they have defeated half of the meager competition already, after all; they got that shot, because I am God around here. As in, a kami. Why do you think they had all those mythical trinkets laying around, if not because of an egomaniacal and narcissistic promoter who totally didn't give himself the gimmick of an omnipotent, omniscient deity that derives pleasure from in-ring violence? Moving on, past a match in which Hoshiko Tagawa beat returning part-timer Chitose Ariwara simply because she was losing heat despite being considered one of our most promising athletes, we have Kichi Mochizuki have a heart to heart with Emiko Miyoshi: she will buy our heroine some time by standing in the way of Spider Isako herself.

Might this the best match we've ever had? Rika Tsujimura defeats Nami Genda with the kind of help from her pal Hoshiko Tagawa that would normally get someone disqualified on the spot. They lied, they cheated, they stole, and they can do it because they're ****ing yakuza. We're not exactly going for subtlety here, unless you think a sledgehammer to the face is subtle. If you do, either go see a psychiatrist right now, or go work for those complete psychopaths over there in Scotland, I heard they like sledgehammers to the face. And baseball bats covered in barbed wire, set on fire and then shoved right up the back end of a member of the audience. I had to spend several months in a hospital after that small misunderstanding.

Oh, ****. You see - yes, Kichi Mochizuki did end up facing Spider Isako as per her earlier promise, gaining a kayfabe injury in the process to make the Spider seem like a vicious villain, but she was bad up there, enough so that I think her injury will soon become very, very real, if she doesn't straighten up soon. Should I sic Takenouchi after her? Girl looks like a drill sergeant and acts the part in the locker room, after all. The Spider celebrates her victory, doing her villain bathing in blood thing, and-

Wait, did Takenouchi just get a rating of 44 from that one wrestling website in the title match between Bodyguard Crush and Eight-Grader Syndrome? Looks like we were right to give them the title after all, especially since Kurmochi blew it even worse than Mochizuki. And wow, that butch ass marine wannabe deviated from the script during the title celebration, only to make the segment better? I'm scouring the website right now and, hey, Matsuda-san! Yes, you useless waste of black market organs, come here!

Dalton · May 18, 2020

This is so entertaining

boswer91 · May 18, 2020

Damn i wish this was on a real tv...like maybe HBO or something...

This is so entertaining ! Between Bodyguard Crush getting the tag titles, Spider continuing her domination as a villain and Genda / Tagawa sledgehamming people...(maybe i should listen to your advice and go see a psychiatrist )

Loved this episode 3 ^^

Neoteros · May 19, 2020

This is so entertaining

Damn i wish this was on a real tv...like maybe HBO or something...

This is so entertaining ! Between Bodyguard Crush getting the tag titles, Spider continuing her domination as a villain and Genda / Tagawa sledgehamming people...(maybe i should listen to your advice and go see a psychiatrist )

Loved this episode 3 ^^

Thanks.

Bishōjo Monogatari

Episode 4 - January 2020, Week 4

Since Genda and Mochizuki didn't exactly excel in their singles matches, in the opener we put them as a tag team against Angel Takudome and Mio Takasu, in a high-flying lucha bout where Genda finally shone, earning a higher rating than everyone else on the ring, up to and including the returning veterans - she straight up got into the 40s, even though it was Mochizuki that pinned Takasu for the win. You know, this could work. Next week, I might put them against one of our own tag teams. Speaking of tag teams, Bodyguard Crush is approached by Spider Isako: now that Kasahara is the heir apparent of the Dojo, maybe, just maybe, she could earn some money by training the Spider's evil minions? The crowd pops like the cherry of a 12 year old in a ****ed up hentai dredged up from the darkest depths of the internet - Takenouchi is so good at playing the butch, stoic warrior role she's literally impossible to truly hate, she outshines even the Spider.

The next bout, there's not much to say: Yayoi Kurmochi is disqualified after a bait and switch moment in which her opponent Hoshiko Tagawa was deviously helped by delinquent ally Rika Tsujimura: looks like Kamio and Kurmochi will need some help if they ever want to prevail over the criminals, who have started to go by the name of The Outermost Path - that is, the name the yakuza calls itself.

Taking cues from our previous show, the Spider convinces Asami Okubo to stand in the way of Emiko Miyoshi, and she does exactly that, being - of course - defeated by the wholesome babyface. On one hand, Miyoshi almost breaks kayfabe when Okubo botches a move and almost injures her but, on the other hand, it looks like Kyoto's young girls are starting to idolize Miyoshi like she's Chigusa Nagayo or Lioness Asuka reborn, if the internet is to be believed:

The show ends with Miyoshi going into the small crowd to celebrate - she's finally going to face the Spider again, and I'm finally going to be able to peddle Miyoshi merchandise to middle schoolers. She's not that over yet, but with some luck she could turn into our figurehead. Her generic shoujo heroine gimmick is what's bringing her down, but we might be able to remedy that. I'm going to have a talk with her...

Neoteros · May 19, 2020

<div style="text-align:center;">Bishōjo Monogatari

January Recap</div>

Even though we've lost a small bit of money, things seem to be looking up, since the wider world has noticed a couple of our wrestlers, namely Emiko Miyoshi and Yayoi Kurmochi. Since their gimmicks are only poor to adequate, I am going to tweak them and see if they can get a boost - if they're doing this good despite being saddled with sub-par gimmicks, a slight tweak could turn them into solid gold.

<img alt="sDaVaWs" data-src="https://imgur.com/a/sDaVaWs" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Our franchise players are, in order, Kaori Takenouchi, Emiko Miyoshi and Asami Okubo. Since Miyoshi and Okubo have had a legit spat, and Okubo doesn't have a lot going on as far as storylines go, I am going to start a simple feud between the two, now that both of our debut storylines are approaching their end. Kichi Mochizuki didn't have a lot to do either, and that's why I signed a 27 year old monster heel named Kaori Mochizuki - there's no actual relation between the two beyond sharing a surname,but I'm going to roll with this lucky coincidence and make them kayfabe sisters. Kichi is no Undertaker, but Kaori looks like she'd make a very convincing Kane here.

According to creative, our next big things are Rina Kasahara and The Outermost Path duo. I might let Okubo into their yakuza tag team and turn it into a stable; in fact, the alliance of Spider Isako and Bodyguard Crush deserves its own stable, too. Our lone hot prospect is of course Spider Isako because, come on. The only other wrestler under our employ to be mentioned by creative in a positive way is Aki Kamio, who hasn't been doing much.

For the first show of February, we're moving to Kobe - got to increase popularity in the whole Kansai region if we want to grow.

DarK_RaideR · May 19, 2020

Not a fan of anime and completely lost you with the weeabo stuff and terminology, but I do appreciate the indy joshi scene (one of my last TEW16 diaries was as WINNOW so many names ring a bell) and this seems like an interesting concept. I generally avoid diaries that lack images and portraits, but this is concise and easy to read, plus the sleaze reminds me of Bigelow_Cartwheel's Oddworld diary. Keep it up!

Neoteros · May 19, 2020

Not a fan of anime and completely lost you with the weeabo stuff and terminology, but I do appreciate the indy joshi scene (one of my last TEW16 diaries was as WINNOW so many names ring a bell) and this seems like an interesting concept. I generally avoid diaries that lack images and portraits, but this is concise and easy to read, plus the sleaze reminds me of Bigelow_Cartwheel's Oddworld diary. Keep it up!

It lacks images and portraits because I still haven't found a way to put images from imgur in here without them showing up as mere links.

boswer91 · May 19, 2020

I really loved the fact that there is a recap at the end ^^

Who is ( or will be ) YOUR N°1 Girl ? Spider Isako or Emiko Miyoshi ?

In all the games i have played so far Emiko is the first to shine and be super over but Spider is super marketable so i tend to go towards Emiko because of the fact she a babyface and Spider mu N°2 girl. I will look forward to see what will be your pick about this subject^^

I felt weird a moment when you talked about popping the cherry of a 12 year old ( i wish it was like older ) but yeah you found that on the darkweb so at the end it works ^^

Spider Isako continues to spread her web ( you saw what i did there ) and form a new stable, good !

Love the show overall ^^

Neoteros · May 19, 2020

Bishōjo Monogatari

Episode 5 - February 2020, Week 1

Monster heel Kaori Mochizuki, kayfabe sister of Kichi Mochizuki, makes her debut against her and tag team partner Nami Genda; the tag team, now going by the name of Las Luchadoras Japonesas, manages to draw, barely. The crowd seemed to love the juxtaposition of the Luchadoras' suitably lucha-y spots to Kaori's monstrous appearance, so we should totally go ahead with that feud. Enter Bodyguard Crush, that show off their tag team trophies to the crowd, seemingly oblivious to the fact that Aki Kamio, Emiko Miyoshi and Yayoi Kurmochi have decided to team up; last week, Kamio and Kurmochi realized they couldn't do it alone, and what better ally to the forces of good than Miyoshi? Kurmochi harnesses the power of friendship to defeat Rina Kasahara by pinfall, after finishing her with a Sky Twister Press, in an otherwise unremarkable bout.

Asami Okubo is let into the criminal enterprise of The Outermost Path, still sore about last week's defeat to Miyoshi. Speak of the devil, or rather, the incorruptible pure angel: Emiko Miyoshi defeats Spider Isako by submission in a match that probably dragged on for too long but, whatever. The sight of Miyoshi with Aphrodite's Girdle firmly on her body is a sight I hope will be making waves in the least reputable corners of the internet, and the slight tweak I let Matsuda-san do to her gimmick (you can probably guess what kind of tweak it was) was well received by the crowd, too. And here I thought I would've had to put her through a drastic gimmick change.

I really loved the fact that there is a recap at the end ^^

Who is ( or will be ) YOUR N°1 Girl ? Spider Isako or Emiko Miyoshi ?

In all the games i have played so far Emiko is the first to shine and be super over but Spider is super marketable so i tend to go towards Emiko because of the fact she a babyface and Spider mu N°2 girl. I will look forward to see what will be your pick about this subject^^

I felt weird a moment when you talked about popping the cherry of a 12 year old ( i wish it was like older ) but yeah you found that on the darkweb so at the end it works ^^

Spider Isako continues to spread her web ( you saw what i did there ) and form a new stable, good !

Love the show overall ^^

To be honest? Kaori Takenouchi is so over as a heel, she could do the most despicable thing on the ring and the crowd would still cheer for her. For now, Emiko is #1 simply because Kaori is standing in the Spider's way. I have such an overabundance of heels that if she weren't so good as a heel I might've made her turn.

boswer91 · May 19, 2020

Love the show !

You have now a little tag team division with teams forming at every show. Cool to see the tag team division having some love^^

Ah ok ! So maybe you won't have any choice at some point other that to make the face Turn for Kaori if she continues to be so over.

Neoteros · May 19, 2020

Love the show !

You have now a little tag team division with teams forming at every show. Cool to see the tag team division having some love^^

Ah ok ! So maybe you won't have any choice at some point other that to make the face Turn for Kaori if she continues to be so over.

Yeah, I'm about to set up a trios tournament for the mini-stables, too - if only because I want to give the round robin tournament format a try, and see how it goes.

foolinc · May 19, 2020

It lacks images and portraits because I still haven't found a way to put images from imgur in here without them showing up as mere links.

There are a couple of ways to do this. If you have the imgur link and know the file extension you just need the add said extension to the link.

https://imgur.com/KN6FoXF

becomes

https://imgur.com/KN6FoXF.jpg

becomes

Imgur also has a couple of different views that include options for embedded friendly code.

Click on "Get shared links"

OR this view is available when you are looking the "images" section of your account.

Neoteros · May 19, 2020

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="foolinc" data-cite="foolinc" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="49589" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>There are a couple of ways to do this. If you have the imgur link and know the file extension you just need the add said extension to the link. <pre class="ipsCode"> https://imgur.com/KN6FoXF becomes https://imgur.com/KN6FoXF.jpg becomes </pre><div></div> <img alt="KN6FoXF.jpg" data-src="https://imgur.com/KN6FoXF.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> Imgur also has a couple of different views that include options for embedded friendly code. <img alt="XlVIOBB.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/XlVIOBB.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> Click on "Get shared links" <img alt="Bo5ZMxe.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Bo5ZMxe.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> OR this view is available when you are looking the "images" section of your account. <img alt="KcBoSWQ.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/KcBoSWQ.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /></div></blockquote> Thanks man, I'll try it now. <img alt=";)" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/wink.png.686f06e511ee1fbf6bdc7d82f6831e53.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> <div style="text-align:center;">Bishōjo Monogatari Episode 6 - February 2020, Week 2</div> Our new show begins with Spider Isako doing her thing, and adding the newest member of the locker room, the terrifying Kaori Mochizuki, to her personal rogues' gallery. Because come on, they look like they're about to unleash a horde of demons upon the world, don't they? Oh, by the way, we're in Osaka today - we're losing money, so we need to expand our fanbase or else. Holy crap, Mochizuki looks more the part of the violent mook of a dark villainess than Takenouchi ever could, I wonder... yeah, Matsuda-san, could you get Takenouchi over here? There's something I have in mind, hope she's gonna like it. <blockquote class="imgur-embed-pub" lang="en" data-id="104tB1E"><a href="//imgur.com/104tB1E"></a></blockquote><script async src="//s.imgur.com/min/embed.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Our opening bout was nothing too special, just Kaori Mochizuki dispatching Nami Genda like the beast she is. Got to build the monster heel up, after all. Our Kaori Takenouchi, not much later, made Kichi Mochizuki look like a turd. Seriously, look at this. Kichi would be a jobber, if we had enough people here to divide into tiers, with Nami Genda keeping her company. While Kamio and Kurmochi can be hit or miss, at least they've got the fans on their side. <blockquote class="imgur-embed-pub" lang="en" data-id="a/ShpkpIS" data-context="false" ><a href="//imgur.com/a/ShpkpIS"></a></blockquote><script async src="//s.imgur.com/min/embed.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Delinquent Rika Tsujimura goes off on a rant about Aki Kamio, mocking her chuunibyou demeanour and her rather unique fashion sense, as the opening angle to a round robin tournament that will put all our stables (not so coincidentally arranged into trios) against each other. I was expecting more, given how creative (basically, Matsuda-san and a revolving door gaggle of puroresu geeks) keeps going on and on about how eloquent she is but, whatever. We're not yet at the level where a single wrestler of ours can come up with enough catchphrases to fill a dictionary. And now, on to our first trios bout: <blockquote class="imgur-embed-pub" lang="en" data-id="a/0vrfGC3" data-context="false" ><a href="//imgur.com/a/0vrfGC3"></a></blockquote><script async src="//s.imgur.com/min/embed.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Yeah, yeah, our disgustingly pretty Emiko-chan did horribly but, whatever. This match between her wholesome moe bait Girl Posse and Okubo's collection of barely legal (as in, a hair's breadth away from a jail cell) Sukeban lowlifes showed that she could hop on the ring drunk, and young girls would still eat it up like candy. Tsujimura though, damn. Look at that rating, man. And now, for this evening's crown jewel: <blockquote class="imgur-embed-pub" lang="en" data-id="a/9hnk6Y0" data-context="false" ><a href="//imgur.com/a/9hnk6Y0"></a></blockquote><script async src="//s.imgur.com/min/embed.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Bodyguard Crush indeed. And it totally looks like there were quite a few yuri fans in the crowd, too. I'm a genius. Now, our popularity has been stagnating. This is bad. Maybe we should move to slightly bigger arenas, and bring in a couple high-flying veterans to mentor our luchadora wannabes, like... yes, Chitose Ariwara would do. She's so disgustingly pure it's like she could be Miyoshi's mother, and who cares if she's prone to injuries, I'll be paying her on an appearance basis, and her main role will be behind the scenes, anyway...

boswer91 · May 19, 2020

A Real Crush between members of Bodyguard Crush ? Who knew ?

I'm a little surprised that you said that your popularity is stagnating. I tought he will continue to go up even if doesn't go up very fast. In my mind a local company can't go further than up. Maybe the fact that you move into an another region to perform will help you gain popularity. <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/smile.png.142cfa0a1cd2925c0463c1d00f499df2.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

I like the fact there is image now but maybe put them in the center, it will be more pleasant to see ^^

Another good show from you, keep it up ! <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/smile.png.142cfa0a1cd2925c0463c1d00f499df2.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Neoteros · May 20, 2020

A Real Crush between members of Bodyguard Crush ? Who knew ?

I'm a little surprised that you said that your popularity is stagnating. I tought he will continue to go up even if doesn't go up very fast. In my mind a local company can't go further than up. Maybe the fact that you move into an another region to perform will help you gain popularity.

I like the fact there is image now but maybe put them in the center, it will be more pleasant to see ^^

Another good show from you, keep it up !

Thanks dude, I'm going to try the generic venue option now to see what happens.

Bishōjo Monogatari

Episode 7 - February 2020, Week 3

See, this is the other reason why we're going to try and turn Kaori Takenouchi face, aside from the fact she's stealing Spider Isako's thunder: she's just too likeable, even behind the scenes. And this is why today's show will begin with the kind of skit you'd expect a face to have, the heiress to the dojo Rina Kasahara and her ronin for hire out on a date.

See that road agent, Tomoko Nagatsuka? After nearly two months of hiring local talent for one night deals, we found out that having her as our own road agent would've cost us less than employing Crusher Ichihara on a one night basis. We move on, and Aki Kamio continues to disappoint: she looked very off on her losing bout against Hoshiko Tagawa, and this is not the first time it's happened. I'm going to bury that girl, she's useless. Yes, Mr. Calaway? Yeah, we're going to have a funeral over here, I wonder if you could help organize it? Yes, yes, that'd repay your debt to the Matsuda family, too.

Anyway. Our girls are still in the ring, when Kaori Mochizuki appears, and thrashes them both. Why, how, and who could possibly be the one who sicced the monster against them? Yeah, spoiler alert, it's Spider Isako, but you knew this already. So, most of our girls are young and green, so I got three veterans on board, all of them well-versed in lucha libre. One of them, Chitose Ariwara, you know already, the other, Sakura Sada, you don't. The match's result is not important, what's important is that they delivered - their performance and their portrayal of their gimmicks is state of the art compared to what our young women can do, so hopefully they'll teach the kids something about how to wrestle.

And now, the second act of our trios tournament: the bubbly Girl Posse versus the devious Thug Dojo. Where Emiko Miyoshi floundered, Kaori Takenouchi shone, taking a double flying dropkick from Aki Kamio and Yayoi Kurmochi that sent her straight through a table. She didn't even flinch, pushing the two halves of the broken table aside with a smirk and coming back inside the ring to dish out pain. Not bad at all, for her first real bump. The baddies won, by the way, and celebrated their victory.

Our popularity went up. Nice.

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Bishōjo Monogatari Puroresu - A Tale of Weeaboo Degeneracy and Lucharesu Excess

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