Self

My original plan was to finish him up at WrestleFestival (in canon I think he leaves CGC in December '96) but for now he's still with the company. He has his good qualities. A solid experienced heel with size. However, he's also kind of expensive and comes with more travel costs than most. It's possible you'll never see him again, or he could show up next week. While on the subject, here are some other bits of roster news... Brys Turcotte has finished up. Really, I only brought him in to work WrestleFestival and a few Live event shots. Unlike his tag team partner, he isn't local, and despite Brys being a solid, dependable guy, that's not worth the plane fare from Halifax. If Nelson ever needs to work a tag match, I have his number. Similarly, Andy Gordy is a solid referee, but lives too far away and isn't worth the travel expenses. Noel Madden just debuted, and he lives in Calgary. Financially it made more sense to use him. Xander Robinson is in the final month of his contract, and I'm probably not going to resign him. I don't have room to push him right now, but he's far too talented to just be a job guy. Like, outrageously talented. So good. He needs to disappear and return in 6-8 months with a fresh coat of paint and be a force to be reckoned with. Switchblade Mike is in a similar boat. I tested some ideas on Live Events, but the chemistry wasn't there. He has a good thing going in DAVE, so I'm tempted to let his contract expire and see how things look further down the line. I have enough big, musclehead projects to develop. Finally, Bob Casey is the quintessential job guy... but he's not local, and it's hard to argue he's worth the travel expenses when I have a growing number of cheap youngsters at home. I could easily see myself reversing any of these decisions at a moment's notice, but my roster is getting a bit big.

SUNDAY WEEK 3 APRIL 1997 Calgary, Alberta (626 in attendance) Broadcast on Alberta on Air (3,706) and BCB (3,688). Combined Rating <0.01 Alex DeColt calls out the School of Tradition 69 ROCKY PSYCHO VS HOWLING DOG 47 Bowen & Rogers Promo 58 CONDOR VS MARIO HEROIC 26 George DeColt tries to get the belt 58 BIFF THE BRUISER VS TED MOORE 20 Highlights from Cranbrook 20 Live Events /w Ed Monton 53 THE FLOCK VS SOLDIERS OF FORTUNE 52 George DeColt announces next Title Bout 60 FINAL RATING 57 Posting late. Sometimes my job requires me to work weekends. I thought the most interesting thing about this week's Frenchie's Five (favourite babyfaces in Alberta) would be Ed Monton's popularity... but Condor's the fifth most popular? Poor guy. He's been less than an afterthought this entire time. No wonder so few thought he could beat Mario Heroic. Speaking of Mario... Is he a popular character is more modern version of the database? I've only ever seen him as a washed out never-was or 18 year old still figuring out his first handful of matches. Maybe in the future the upside will emerge, for now Condor is twice the wrestler he is. Next time on Title Bout Wrestling... CGC Bubbleweight Title: Jake Sloan vs Helen Wheels Dan DaLay & John McClean vs Jack & Alex DeColt Rash Reilly & Frankie Flame vs Eddie Chandler & Johnny Maverick

Jerome Turner "Last week Barry Bowen made a statement with an attack on Steve DeColt and Ed Monton, seemingly supported by Roger Rogers. Is a new alliance forming? It won't be the only one. The School of Tradition has expanded. Not only do they boast tonight's defending tag team champions, but they have some new students, already in the ring. " IN RING ERIC TYLER has his entire roster of School of Tradition students lined up in the ring. FRANKIE FLAME. RASH REILLY. JOHN McCLEAN looks absolutely thrilled to be there, while DAN DALAY looks like he'd rather be anywhere else, clutching his CGC Television Title belt. ERIC TYLER Settle down and listen up. School is now in session. Last week I introduced you to the men who will soon become household names in this sport. Alone they have suffered, but together, under my guidance, they will become the finest athletes this country has ever seen. Paragons of virtue. Monuments to my excellence. And why? Because they have something those DeColts could only dream of having; a willingness to learn. ALEX DECOLT There's only one thing your students have that I want, and that's the CGC Television Title. I feel like you've been avoiding me, Dan DaLay? What happened? I used to see you every week. Attacking me. Bullying me. Now all you do is run away like a coward. What changed? Surely it's not because I kicked your ass at WrestleFestival. Why don't I come down there right now so we can 'talk'. For old time's sake. ERIC TYLER You've got a big mouth, Alex, but I'm sorry to inform you that your newfound confidence is just warm, comforting self-delusion. Dan DaLay didn't run from you at WrestleFestival... he simply granted you mercy. A rookie mistake that will not be repeated. If you want to provide my students another learning opportunity, we'll happily welcome you into this ring... but Dan DaLay isn't the only one looking to take you DeColts down a peg. I think you'll find yourself quite outnumbered. ALEX DECOLT I don't know about that. EDDIE CHANDLER and JOHNNY MAVERICK slide into the ring and pull all of the Student's trousers down! Reilly covers his shame. John McClean falls over himself trying to cover his sparkling white tighties whities. Frankie shamelessly tries to give chase in brown-stained underpants. DaLay is furious and embarrassed and Eric Tyler finds himself face to face with JACK DECOLT, who is preparing the Iron- Tyler bails, hiding behind security as the attackers leave laughing. ROCKY PSYCHO VS HOWLING DOG Jerome Turner "Two weeks ago Howling Dog broke Rocky's undefeated streak with a shock roll-up. Rocky demanded this rematch." All smiles, Howling Dog mocks Rocky with roll up attempts and culturally inappropriate pasta references. Rocky struggles to keep his cool, but elegant arm drags and fancy head scissors can't put the Dog away. Rocky snaps and- Sky High Spinebuster! 1... 2... Rocky kicks out but Dog uses his anger against him. Small package! Victory Roll! Dog climbs up top, but underestimates Rocky's fury and gets shoved all the way to the outside! Cannonball dive! Rocky is relentless, hammering away with punches and headbutts and the referee counts... 7... 8...9... Rocky comes to his senses just in time to roll inside, and Dog is counted out. ROCKY PSYCHO WINS (9:29) Security are terrified that Rocky is going to continue the assault, but instead he takes Dog's magic tomahawk and leaves. INTERVIEW ZONE ROGER ROGERS is pleased as punch to have his wheelchair parked up alongside the gigantic BARRY BOWEN. ROGER ROGERS I'm sure you have been worried all week, but let me assure you that I am fine. I escaped unharmed from the violent and vile attack upon my person by Steve DeColt, and it's all thanks to this man, Barry Bowen. A hero. A knight in shining armour. He saw an innocent fan in need, a disabled man who simply wanted to cheer on his former favourite wrestler, and he came to his rescue without a second thought. Yet how does CGC reward this heroism? With scorn. With talks about another suspension. Ludicrous! Unfair! A travesty of justice! I will do everything in my power to make sure the treacherous Committee can't stand in his way, because I know exactly how it feels to have George's DeColt's cruel boot upon my neck, keeping me from what I want. Me and Barry Bowen are two peas in a pod, and all of CGC are going to feel our might. BARRY BOWEN No more running, DeColt. No more hiding. That belt belongs to me. CONDOR VS MARIO HEROIC Jerome Turner "It's time for some fast paced Bubbleweight action!" Condor uses karate kicks and judo throws to try to solve the enigma that is young Mario, but to no avail. His moves? Mysterious. His tactics? Strange. He flips and flops and misses a springboard backflip done for reasons unclear, allowing Condor to swoop in with the Flight of the Condor (Top Rope Splash) for the 1... 2... 3! CONDOR WINS (4:35) Jerome Turner "The Bubbleweight division is heating up. There's just the small matter of CGC management getting their hands on the belt..." BACKSTAGE GEORGE DECOLT is trying to get into a locker room, but the door is blocked by the massive LAND MASS. Inside, HELEN WHEELS has the CGC Bubbleweight Title belt. GEOERGE DECOLT Helen, be reasonable. If you're not going to defend it, why do you want it? HELEN WHEELS I'll defend it! Bring Julie Forletta over here and I'll defend it right now. Or one of Steve's girlfriends. Line them up I'll knock all their teeth down their throats! Why didn't you make a women's championship, huh? Sexism, that's why! You afraid of strong women, George? I'll give you back your precious, shrimp belt for babies, when you get me my own belt. CGC Queen of Everything! I want jewels! I want gold! Give me the prettiest belt the world has ever seen and maybe I'll consider trading you. George considers barging in, but there's no way past Land Mass. GEORGE DECOLT I'll talk it over with the Committee... FRENCHIE'S FIVE FRENCHIE MARCEL We asked ze fans here in Calgary who their favourite wrestler is... BIFF THE BRUISER VS TED MOORE Jerome Turner "Biff has been forced to hold the "Poor Widdle Baby" belt ever since he embarrassed himself in a pie eating contest at WrestleFestival" Ted mistakes the Poor Widdle Baby belt for a teddy bear and Biff doesn't like that one bit. He bashes, batters and bruises before hitting a Lariat for a pin. BIFF THE BRUISER (2:45) Biff's pretty pleased with himself, until the referee gives him back the Poor Widdle Baby belt. Jerome Turner "Last week CGC were in Cranbrook, British Columbia." Undersized and overmatched, JAKE SLOAN hits CHRISTOPHER HART with a baseball slide to keep him out of the ring and score a count out victory. RASH REILLY distracts the referee so that FRANKIE FLAME can take out the opposition with a chair and JOHN McCLEAN can lock in the Tradition Lift (Double Chicken Wing) for the tap out. UPCOMING EVENTS Saturday Week 4 April - CGC Live! in Revelstoke, British Columbia Saturday Week 1 May - CGC Live! Fort McMurray, Alberta Sunday Week 1 May - Title Bout Wrestling in Edmonton, Alberta Saturday Week 2 May - CGC Live! Smithers Bulkly, British Columbia Saturday Week 3 May - CGC Live! Powell River, British Columbia Sunday Week 3 May - Title Bout Wrestling in Langley, British Columbia Saturday Week 4 May - CGC Live! Kamloops, British Columbia ED MONTON Roger Rogers has found someone else to try to ride to the top of CGC, but it'll take more than cheap tricks and powerbombs through furniture to keep me down. If Barry Bowen wants a piece of me, he can meet me this Saturday at the Revelstoke Forum. I said I wasn't aboot to let Rogers get away with any more tomfoolery, and I aim to be a man of my word. CGC TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH Black Sheep & Battering Lamb THE FLOCK THE SOLDIERS OF FORTUNE Chance & Fate /w John McClean Jerome Turner "Black Sheep humiliated John McClean at WrestleFestival, so he's paying extra special attention to this one." John McClean has set up a little school desk at ringside, where he can take notes as the Soldiers deal with his sworn enemy. Black Sheep constantly messes with him, throwing balls of paper, until the Soldiers stop his farmyard fun with cohesive destructive power. They herd Black Sheep into their corner and do exactly what they've been paid to do; teach McClean how to solve an irritating problem. Chance repeatedly gives the student openings to interfere behind the referee's back, but McClean messes each of them up. Taking too long. Talking too loud. Missing a punch and hurting his hand on the ring post! Battering Lamb is finally unpenned, and battering rams his opponents with shoulder tackles and mutton chops before dropping a big Leg of Lamb! Slow Roast (Torture Rack) to Fate! McClean tries to interfere, but Black Sheep chases him. Around the ring. Under the ring. Through the ring! In the meantime however, Chance has saved his partner, disposed of Lamb, and the Soldiers intercept Black Sheep with a Spinebuster/Senton combo for the 1... 2... 3! SOLDIERS OF FORTUNE WIN (11:16) INTERVIEW ZONE HELEN WHEELS looks incredibly smug as LAND MASS guards her from GEORGE DECOLT, who stands beside a large podium with a sheet covering it. What could possibly be under there? Helen is thrilled. GEORGE DECOLT Against my better judgment, the CGC Matchmaking Committee have determined that we are unable to force Helen Wheels to relinquish her stolen property, so we have no choice but to give her what she wants. If Helen wants to be a Champion, we hereby officially recognize her as the first ever CGC Bubbleweight Champion... Helen is confused. GEORGE DECOLT ... and we are thrilled to announce her first ever title defense. Next week! Title Bout Wrestling! Helen Wheels versus... George whips the sheet off of the podium to reveal... It's JAKE SLOAN! HELEN WHEELS What? No! That's not what I... No!

Love the idea of most belts. Definitely going on the list, but may need a few tweaks to get a clean Top 5. Currently it's a 6-way tie for 5th place. He can bulk up to Middleweight, but he's 5'7 so that's a lot of (hopefully) muscle to pack on. Height might hold him back from being a top star in a medium term, unless he becomes some kind of tiny tank. I like him as a Lightweight right now. I have a lot of big heels, so having someone smaller to take bumps in valuable. Plus, there's a Bubbleweight division that is overflowing with babyfaces and no heels. Rash is going to find it easy to find spots on live events. In my last private game he had a solid, multi-year midcard career, with lots of storylines and TV time, as a dumb guy in heel teams who eventually spins off as a babyface. Problem is, he's already a babyface, he's had terrible chemistry with everyone I've paired him with, and he kind of sucks in general. Bottom 5 worst performers on the roster. So he's not exactly a priority. Haven't done tallest. Or heaviest. It's trickier to do it when I'm making things up.

I'm currently using the "CGC Matchmaking Committee" as my authority figures in my 1997 diary game. A 5-man team, a mix of veteran wrestlers and television executives who mostly stay in the background, deciding on matches, but occasionally pop in to suspend someone or publicly vote on the odd big issue. "Directors" felt too Big Business for me (works for corporate WCW though and "Booking" feels like it breaks kayfabe too much for me. "Matchmaking" just felt nice and quaint. Does exactly what it says on the tin.

SUNDAY WEEK 1 APRIL 1997 Langley, British Columbia (803 in attendance) Broadcast on Alberta On Air (3,570) and BCB (3,657). Combined Rating <0.01 Eric Tyler Promo 73 FRANKIE FLAME VS XANDER ROBINSON 41 Steve DeColt Promo 70 Slave Lake Highlights 31 RASH REILLY VS TEMPEST APPLEBY 33 Whipper tries to get Helen's belt 45 Rocky Psycho Interview 26 MAMMOTH & LAND MASS VS CHANDLER & MAVERICK 42 Live Events /w Moose 34 John McClean hypes Tag Title Match 51 BARRY BOWEN VS STEVE DECOLT 45 Bowen Attacks 54 FINAL RATING 55 No one wants to watch Monton fight the DeColts. Will I ever learn my lesson? Ed Monton is really good (on the same level as Steve, better than the other DeColts) but babyface vs babyface doesn't work, and no amount of Roger Rogers could save it. Thankfully, good promos from Tyler and Steve. The School of Tradition have expanded, which to be fair was a pretty obvious move from the very beginning. It's been one of Tyler's main goals after all. It was just a question of who joins and when. I toyed with introducing them earlier, maybe getting involved in the WrestleFestival main event... but that would have neutered them to fail right out of the gate. This is Tyler's rebound move after a big loss. I considered a lot of options to fill this expanded group. CGC have a lot of youngsters to choose from. Johnny Maverick and Eddie Chandler were far too obvious choices, and I didn't want to just do a Prelude to the eventual Elite stable. Alexander Robinson is excellent but a little too old. Mario Heroic and Canadian Dragon were busy with Bubbleweight stuff, Christopher Hart felt too similar to DaLay, and Ted Moore... I think a really dumb guy would turn himself babyface in that setting way too fast. I'm struggling to write Moore. There's a 'Eugene' quality that isn't sitting well with me when I write the actual words. John McClean feels like a perfect addition to the School of Tradition to me. Good worker. Natural sycophant. Can talk if Tyler is 'occupied'. 'Dirty' Frankie Flame is a bit more of a gamble, but he is a favourite of George DeColt. Finally, the wildcard Rash Reilly is a random gen who graduated from the DeColt Power House in January. He's a smaller guy (although not small enough to make it onto Frenchie's Five last week) but good star quality and promising stats. At 19 he's very young, but has spent the past few months working every live event and pre-show possible... and he's the same age as Jack DeColt. Either way, a lucky guy. Speaking of the Power House, we had our second graduate this week. Much like Rash, he'll be working live events for a while until I find a spot for him. CGC Tag Team Title Match: The Flock vs Soldiers of Fortune Rocky Psycho vs Howling Dog Condor vs Mario Heroic I'm running out of ideas for Frenchie's Five segments. Any ideas?

Jerome Turner "It's been three months since Ed Monton broke free of the managerial services of Roger Rogers, and tonight he's bagged himself a CGC World Title shot. Does he have what it takes to dethrone Stunning Steve? But first, the School of Tradition have some new students, and Eric Tyler wants to introduce them to you all personally." IN-RING ERIC TYLER is already is the ring, looking upon the crowd with scorn. ERIC TYLER Settle down and listen up. School is back in session! A proper education is something that should be given to every young wrestler, but I'm afraid I can no longer allow Jack DeColt entry into my School of Tradition. For all of his promise. For all of his potential. He has been tainted by his family's degenerate influence. He robbed me of the CGC World Title at WrestleFestival. He has rejected my teachings. Just like Alex. Just like Steve. Just like Eddie Chandler and Johnny Maverick. They can't see the benefit of my wisdom... but I've found students who do. This is a new era for the School of Tradition, and some day you will all thank me for it. FRANKIE FLAME VS XANDER ROBINSON Eric Tyler "For years he's been called "Dirty", but Frank is a diamond in the rough. He just needs some polish." Frank looks cleaner in his new school uniform, but he fights dirtier than ever, adding several tricks from the Eric Tyler's playbook. Xander hits back with knife edge chops, but Frankie begs for mercy and Xander turns his back. Pit Stain (Falling Inverted DDT)! 1... 2... 3. FRANKIE FLAME WINS (6:08) INTERVIEW ZONE STEVE DECOLT warms up for his match as his date for tonight, GABRIELLA, watches on. STEVE DECOLT Let's hear it for Eric Tyler. He's finally found some wrestlers dumb enough to join his stupid school. As much as I'd love to go down there and prove you can't polish a turd, tonight I have my hands full, and I don't just mean with this little minx to my left. Ed Monton might be the toughest man I've ever met, and he has my deepest respect... but if he thinks he can take this sweet, sweet belt from my sweet, sweet waist, he doesn't know Stunning Steve. I made a promise to Gabriella that I'd show her the night of her life, and I'm going to do it as CGC Champion. Jerome Turner "Last night the stars of Canadian Golden Combat were at the Arctic Ice Centre. Here's what you missed." BIFF THE BRUISER pins BOB CASEY after a brutal lariat. Biff is thrilled, until he's handed his Poor Widdle Baby championship belt to wear. MOOSE MULDER and MAMMOTH compete in a Pie Eating Contest, but MARIO HEROIC and CONDOR keep stealing pies from Mammoth's table. They offer to trade them to HELEN WHEELS for the stolen Bubbleweight belt, but she refuses. Mammoth has nothing to eat! Moose wins! RASH REILLY VS TEMPEST APPLEBY Eric Tyler "I discovered young Rash defacing the WrestleFestival grounds with some very colourful anti-DeColt graffiti. He made good first impression." Arm drags! Dropkicks! Tumblesaults! Flippy do's! A force of nature, Tempest puts the student in a spin, but Rash responds with some Tyler-esque eye pokes and hair pulling and hits a High Schoolboy (Schoolboy off the Second Rope) for the 1. 2. 3. RASH REILLY WINS (6:12) Jerome Turner "Lightning fast bubbleweight action, but what of the new Bubbleweight Championship?" BACKSTAGE CGC Bubbleweight Title belt around her waist, HELEN WHEELS lounges around, protected by LAND MASS and MAMMOTH at her side. WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS can't get past them. WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS Helen. You need to give the belt back. It's not yours. HELEN WHEELS Why not? I won it. I climbed up there and got it. Those were the rules, right? "Any fighter under 200lbs". You saying I'm over 200lbs, old man? WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS You weren't part of the match. There are rules. HELEN WHEELS I don't care about your rules. Those five midgets don't deserve a belt. They only won at WrestleFestival because...I don't know how they won. They probably cheated. Belts should be for real stars, like me. Helen roller skates away, followed by the gigantic Land Mass and Mammoth. No getting around them. INTERVIEW ZONE JULIE FORLETTA interviews a seething ROCKY PSYCHO. JULIE FORLETTA Last week, you lost you first match in Canadian Golden Combat... when... you um... Rocky glares at her. Julie hands him the microphone and backs away. ROCKY PSYCHO Howling Dog! Fortunato! Molto Fortunato. You could never do that again in a million years. Voglio una rivincita! Rematch! Next week! /w Helen Wheels LAND MASS & MAMMOTH EDDIE CHANDLER & JOHNNY MAVERICK Eric Tyler "In ten years, when Rash Reilly and Frankie Flame are top stars in this sport, no one will remember these short sighted fools Chandler and Maverick." Helen roller skates around the ring, showing of her stolen CGC Bubbleweight Title, as Johnny and Eddie compete over who can body slam the giants. Both lose equally, and Chandler gets squished and squashed. CANADIAN DRAGON and MARIO HEROIC chase Helen around the ring, trying to recover the Bubbleweight belt. Mammoth lumbers to her aid, clotheslining the two cruiserweights. Eddie and Johnny try to take advantage with a double suplex on Land Mass, but their timing is off because Eddie insists on doing a countdown in French. Land Mass suplexes both of them, and Mammoth hits a Running Splash for the pin. LAND MASS & MAMMOTH WIN (5:31) Jerome Turner "Missed out on WrestleFestival? Don't worry, the stars of CGC could be coming to a town near you soon." UPCOMING EVENTS Saturday Week 3 April - CGC Live! in Cranbrook, British Columbia Sunday Week 3 April - Title Bout Wrestling in Calgary, Alberta Saturday Week 4 April - CGC Live! in Revelstoke, British Columbia Saturday Week 1 May - CGC Live! Fort McMurray, Alberta Sunday Week 1 May - Title Bout Wrestling in Edmonton, Alberta MOOSE MULDER You got pies in Cranbrook? Because I'm comin' on Saturday and I'm comin' hungry! I'm the CGC Pie Eating Champion and I plan to defend that title in every town in the country. Open challenge! Any wrestler! Any fan! Bring your appetite! SCHOOL OF TRADITION CLASSROOM JULIE FORLETTA interviews the School of Tradition in a locker room that has been kitted out as a Classroom, complete with desks and a blackboard. In the background, RASH REILLY carves his name into a desk as FRANKIE FLAME throws paper airplanes. JOHN McCLEAN is positively beaming, as he's flanked by CHANCE and FATE. JOHN McCLEAN WrestleFestival was a dark day for John McClean. A dark, dirty day... but then Eric Tyler turned my frown upside down by asking me to enroll in his prestigious School of Tradition. What an honour! What a privilege! The things I will learn sitting under Mr. Tyler's tree. It's every young wrestler's dream. Next week my education begins, as I get to sit ringside as the Soldiers of Fortune defend their tag team titles. I'm not even mad that the Matchmaking Committee have given The Flock a title shot. Black Sheep humiliated me at WrestleFestival, and next week I get to learn how Mr. Tyler's fabulous faculty settle the score. FATE Next week! Lambs chops and a side of Sheep Stew! CGC WORLD TITLE MATCH ED MONTON VS STEVE DECOLT /w Gabriella Eric Tyler "This may be the only time I ever say this, but I hope Ed Monton wins this match. Steve DeColt is a disgrace as Champion." Before the match can begin, ROGER ROGERS barges his way to the front row in his wheelchair, fending off fans with a pointy stick. He's wearing an old Canadian Enforcers t-shirt and waves a 'front row' ticket around, threatening to sue anyone who questions its authenticity. Stunning Steve struts his stuff early, showing off his raw power and delighting his date by hitting a Gabri-Electric Chair Drop just for her. Double tough Monton responds with pure fisticuffs, throwing hands as Rogers loudly cheers on his former client. Which mostly serves to distract Monton. Ed unleashes patriotic fury, but Steve won't go down without a fight. He kicks out of a Bridging Canadian Suplex. He powers out of a Canadian Half Crab! Rogers raises a boombox above his head to play the old Canadian Enforcers theme music. Monton ejects the tape and breaks it, but it gives Steve an opening. Powerful Punches! Luscious Lariat! Sexy Slam! Steve hits a Running Bulldog, but Roger Rogers is poking Gabriella with a pointy stick, so he rolls out of the ring to confront him. He tells Rogers to knock it off, but the wheelchair bound 'fan' responds by throwing his shoe at Gabriella. Steve snatches him by the collar and referee Francis Long has to get between them. BARRY BOWEN charges to ringside at full speed and runs through Steve with the Train Wreck (High Velocity Shoulder Tackle)! NO CONTEST (10:23) Bowen batters away security and he continues to attack Steve, preparing to Powerbomb him through the- Monton makes the save with Haymakers, but Bowen's unstoppable. He powerbombs Monton through the announce table! Rogers takes off his Enforcers shirt to reveal a Barry Bowen shirt, and cheers as Bowen stands over the broken bodies of the two competitors. Security rush in to protect them from further damage.

For small indy shows, I think ring announcers make a huge difference in the quality of the show. Maybe not the matches, but certainly the show as a whole. They welcome the crowd. They transition from match to match. They introduce raffles and plug tickets to the next event. They host. A good ring announcer is the most visible member of the roster at that level. However, TEW is designed more around televised wrestling, where ring announcers become a small enough element to abstract out of the game. Which is fine. I do miss them when I'm running tiny promotions though, and doing angles for them gets fiddly.

I loved watching the X Division matches back in the day. That's what brought me back to being a fan after college. Awesome stuff. I agree with that... I just don't like the name. Or the vagueness of the concept. And I'm not particularly interested in writing those kinds of matches. My CGC in 1997 isn't about Xtreme, no limits wrestling. I genuinely forgot WWE did cruiserweights for a while, so I guess it didn't leave much of an impression on me. It's a good, dynamic name. If I had a potential megastar like an AJ Styles or Rey Mysterio (or a Ricky DeColt) maybe I would have gone with it. Sometimes I'm more interested in trying something different, rather than simply referencing things I liked growing up.

"Feared for my life" just seemed like a legal move. Something he was advised to say to help protect the company from unfair dismissal charges. I assumed AEW were showing the footage because it would contradict something Punk said in his interview, but it didn't. Unless I'm missing something? Without audio it's still pretty inconclusive. So the whole thing seems more to pop a rating than anything. I was certainly more interested than usually to read what happened this morning.

Because I like making fun of tiny wrestlers. I'm kidding. Partially kidding. Personally I find "Lightweight" boring. "Cruiserweight" feels very specifically WCW. "Junior Heavyweight" suggests a Japanese influence. The less said about "X-Division" the better. "Bubbleweight" to me is a wackier, more colourful name, inspired by some of the smaller weight classes in boxing (flyweight, featherweight, strawweight) while also not being anything real or specific. I actually had to check I didn't steal it from somewhere, but I can't find anything with a quick Google search. Is it an insulting name? Little bit, yeah. I think that makes sense for CGC in 1997 though. Big George DeColt and his muscular sons (Jack is currently the runt of the litter, all 6' 235lbs of him) would think these little rascals are kind of cute, so why not give them a toy belt to play with? And why not have the manager girl on roller skates take it from them? I do think the CGC belts in general need more vibrancy. I hate the TV title. Cliché boring belt. My CGC is halfway to being a cartoon, so the belts should reflect that. Hence the Tag Belts getting a garish redesign. I asked for pitches months ago about what belt to add to CGC, and a lot of folks suggested a Lightweight belt. I was skeptical at first, but I'm really excited about it now. This is going to be a very useful belt, I think. Nothing main event. Nothing spectacular. But with some recent additions to the roster and the right stories, a good bit of undercard fun.

I use the version with the text, but also including the plan for options. Bonus Belt

If you're competing in WWE, then you are (in theory) one of the greatest fighters in the world who has risen through the ranks to make it to the grandest stage of them all. The NFL has the best football players. WWE has the best combat sports specialists. From Cody to Miz to Dom to Joe McNXT. All better scrappers than the lads down the local pub. That's the central conceit of the show. So for any celebrity to come in and not lose in 5 seconds to anyone on the roster... that's where it starts to bother me. For Logan specifically, that stance has softened. Originally I thought he was just a Youtube celebrity, but he's done combat sports, fights, etc, that give him more legitimacy. Enough to beat Dom, sure. Miz? Maybe. But he lasted longer than 5 minutes against Roman Reigns. That bothered me. In the same way Goldberg beating The Fiend bothered me. But it's much like the Rock thing. My brain has been set up to believe repetition equals mastery, and that the only way to become the best fighter in the world is to have many, many fights on live TV and PPV. And that's not really reality. I should also note I've watched very little of Logan Paul's stuff. I don't habitually watch WWE. My feelings are just based on reading and hearing about things happening. Feelings based on concepts more than execution.

I partially agree. I don't take it to those extremes, but there's something about returning legends or celebrities or 'part timers' coming in and instantly destroying the current roster that makes the sport (the fictional sport that exists in the reality of the show) look bad. Or at least, worse. Goldberg's done it a bunch. Logan Paul instantly being a world beater. CM Punk returning after X years away and becoming AEW World Champion so quickly. It rubs me the wrong way. I believe in ring rust. I believe that if you stop doing something, you lose a certain spark. I guess I want to believe that there's a reason that WWE superstars (in the fictional reality of the show) fight so often. It's to keep their skills sharp and stay ahead of the game. They're like sharks. If they stop swimming they die. But maybe I'm wrong in this thinking. MMA is structured differently. Fight camps are the real way to get people ready for a fight. Those damn Paul brothers keep succeeding in things thanks to (I assume) proper training and expensive trainers. Maybe if companies showed this (kayfabe) preparation side it might help. Rock didn't just wander in. He's been at the Bloodline's Fight Pit, running drills with Solo and Jimmy Uso, rediscovering his spark. I do think Cody/Rocky is a good money match to set up for the future, although I didn't personally love the finish they did in the tag match. Kinda slow.

SUNDAY WEEK 1 APRIL 1997 Langley, British Columbia (803 in attendance) Broadcast on Alberta On Air (4,065) and BCB (3,828). Combined Rating <0.01 DeColt Boys Promo 76 ROYAL CANADIAN AIR FORCE VS THE FLOCK 42 Rogers tries to win back Monton 40 ROCKY PSYCHO VS HOWLING DOG 26 Barry Bowen Promo 44 Frenchie's Five: Lightest 40 BUBBLEWEIGHT TITLE 5-WAY 32 Dan DaLay Promo 38 Upcoming Events /w Mammoth 43 SCHOOL OF TRADITION VS THE DECOLT BOYS 61 New Students Attack 59 FINAL RATING 62 I had a little fun teasing it, but Eric Tyler isn't done. No reason for plans to change. Yet. Feeling rough today. If I did have anything I wanted to wax poetic about I've forgotten. Psycho/Dog was poorly received, but it was a very short storyline match with a lot of penalties built into the concept of it. Mammoth's a better promo than I've been giving him credit for. He's fine. I've let worse talkers talk. Next week on Title Bout Wrestling... CGC World TItle: Ed Monton vs Steve DeColt Land Mass & Mammoth vs Eddie Chandler & Johnny Maverick Dirty Frank vs Xander Robinson

Jerome Turner "WrestleFestival may be over but the fun never stops in Canadian Golden Combat. Get ready for another exciting night of action, with a brand new title and a huge six man tag team match featuring Canada's favourite family." INTERVIEW ZONE STEVE DECOLT Eric Tyler thought his mind-games and cheap tricks could win him the belt at WrestleFestival, but he made one crucial mistake; he underestimated the DeColts. Stunning Steve was out of his league, and Eagle-Eyed Jack caught him red handed trying to steal the victory. JACK DECOLT I don't know about that. I've watched the match back, and he must have cheated a hundred times before I managed to catch him. Just when I was starting to think Mr Tyler wasn't all bad. I think I'll leave the refereeing to Mr Long and his excellent team from now on. Never knew how tough a job they had. ALEX DECOLT Seems like the least we can do is make their jobs a little easier by taking out the trash in tonight's main event. The School of Tradition flunked their test, so I think it's time we taught them a lesson for a change. I'm thinking Geography. This is the Langley Civic Centre. STEVE DECOLT This is Vancouver, British Columbia. JACK DECOLT This! Is! DeColt Country! Nelson Blais & Brys Turcotte ROYAL CANADIAN AIR FORCE THE FLOCK Black Sheep & Battering Lamb Jerome Turner "All four of these men left WrestleFestival victorious. Could the Tag Team Titles be in their future?" Still hungover from WrestleFestival, Black Sheep leaves his partner to it as he tries to find someone in the front row with aspirin. The Air Force ground the Battering Lamb and deliver a military grade beatdown. This isn't helping Black Sheep's headache, so he causes chaos with eye pokes and mustache twisting. Blais chased him under the ring, but takes a Wrong Turn At Albuquerque and emerges to a series of Mutton Chops from Lamb. Armbaaaaa on Turcotte! He taps! THE FLOCK WIN (6:31) INTERVIEW ZONE WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS stands by with ED MONTON. WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS On behalf of the CGC Matchmaking Committee I have the pleasure of announcing that next week Steve DeColt's CGC World Title will be on the line. Due to his victory at WrestleFestival, the Committee have voted Ed Monton as the challenger. Before Ed Monton can speak, in wheels... ROGER ROGERS And it's about time! I've been saying for years that Ed Monton is the very picture of Championship material. Finally the Matchmaking Committee have done something right. ED MONTON Is this a joke? ROGER ROGERS I know we've had our disagreements lately, but allow me to say, truly, sincerely, from the very bottom of my heart... It was all Jon Jetson's fault. He tricked us. He tricked all of us with his rulebreaking and his loose morals and his... but he's gone now, Ed. I tore up his contract. I never want to see that ruffian again. Let's go back to you and me. The Canadian Enforcers. Older. Wiser. With the CGC World Title around our waists. ED MONTON Not a chance. When I fight for the belt next week, the last person I want to see at ringside is you. Ed Monton walks away. Rogers isn't happy. ROCKY PSYCHO VS HOWLING DOG Jerome Turner "After his decisive win over Steve Flash at WrestleFestival, Rocky has certainly been making waves." All smiles and confidence, Rocky shows off elegant arm drags and fancy head scissors, all while mocking Dog with train noises and culturally inappropriate impressions. Howling Dog responds by going on the warpath with tomahawk chops, until Rocky Psycho snaps. No elegance. Nothing fancy. He launches himself and- Dog moves! Roll up! 1... 2... 3! HOWLING DOG WINS (4:32) Jerome Turner "He got him! Rocky Psycho has just suffered his first loss in CGC!" Rocky is livid. He tries to attack but stops when Howling Dog picks up his enchanted tomahawk. He begins his rain dance and the entire ring is drenched in a magical downpour. Rocky is soaked and furious. INTERVIEW ZONE BARRY BOWEN This isn't fair! I'm bigger than Ed Monton! Stronger than Ed Monton! I should be the Number One Contender! Steve DeColt is a yellow bellied coward! Always runnin' from me. Always hidin'. But you can't hide forever. There's a Runaway Train Coming. FRENCHIE'S FIVE FRENCHIE MARCEL CGC have commissioned a brand new championship, exclusively for fighters 200lbs or under. Who are these fighters? And who is ze lightest? CGC BUBBLEWEIGHT TITLE MATCH CANADIAN DRAGON VS CONDOR VS JAKE SLOAN VS MARIO HEROIC VS TEMPEST APPLEBY Jerome Turner "The new belt has been suspended above the ring. Whoever can climb the cables and retrieve it will be the first ever champion." The fighters immediately start trying to climb for the belt as fast as they can, leaving Sloan to pull them back to earth one by one. Condor unleashes karate kicks and judo throws. Tempest puts his opponents into a spin. Canadian Dragon scorches the ring with a fiery comeback. No one can figure out the mysterious moves of young Mario. Every time one climbs, another is there to stop him. Eventually, all five are up on the turnbuckles and cables at the same time, and all five crash and burn. HELEN WHEELS roller skates to ringside, distracting referee Andy Gordy. MAMMOTH squishes Condor and LAND MASS squashes Sloan, but both are too heavy to climb the cables. Frustrated, Helen takes off her skates, and climbs on Mammoth's shoulders. The referee tries to stop her, but she takes down the belt and the time keeper rings the bell. HELEN WHEELS... WINS? (6:00) Jerome Turner "Wait a second. Was she allowed to do that? Do we have our first champion?" Helen and her men flee with the belt as the referee and time keeper and the official competitors argue. BACKSTAGE CGC Television Champion DAN DALAY heads to the ring, when he notices a drawing stuck on the wall. It's of a muscular schoolchild with a toilet on his head, with the caption "Dan Da-Toilet". DAN DALAY You think this is funny? Alex doesn't beat me! I beat him! All day! Every day! That's how this works. And I still have the TV belt! How can he have beat me if I still have this? WrestleFestival was a fluke and I'm gonna prove it. Jerome Turner "Missed out on WrestleFestival? Don't worry, the stars of CGC could be coming to a town near you soon." UPCOMING EVENTS Saturday Week 2 April - CGC Live! in Slave Lake, Alberta Saturday Week 3 April - CGC Live! in Cranbrook, British Columbia Sunday Week 3 April - Title Bout Wrestling in Calgary, Alberta Saturday Week 4 April - CGC Live! in Revelstoke, British Columbia Saturday Week 1 May - Fort McMurray, Alberta Sunday Week 1 May - Title Bout Wrestling in Edmonton, Alberta MAMMOTH Hey Moose Mulder! You think you're a big man? Think you're a big, pie-eating man. Guess again! I'm the king of the pie eating contest, and this Saturday I'm gonna prove it. You! Me! Pie Eating Contest! Chance, Fate & Dan DaLay SCHOOL OF TRADITION THE DECOLT BOYS Steve, Alex & Jack Jerome Turner "Eric Tyler couldn't defeat the DeColts at WrestleFestival. Can his underlings succeed where he failed tonight?" The DeColts work together as a happy, healthy, well-oiled machine. Steve struts. Jack surprises. Alex is eager to get his hands on DaLay, but the student repeatedly avoids him. He's completely off his game without his teacher in his ear. Chance manages to bring Jack behind enemy lines, where he suffers a brutal Fate. The Soldiers untilise their typical cohesive destruction, but they seem unmotivated without a clear financial incentive, and despite being big and strong DaLay makes some rookie mistakes without his teacher in his ear and here comes Steve! Powerful Punches! Luscious Lariat! Sexy Slam! DaLay clobbers him from behind, but that just gives Alex another showdown with the TV champion. Powerful Punches! Pretty Powerslam! Smooth Driving Elbow! DaLay throws a wild Big Boot, accidentally hitting Fate, before fleeing up the ramp. Alex gives chase. Jack and Steve hit Running Bulldogs on the tag team champions, high fiving in mid air, and pick up the 1... 2... 3. THE DECOLT BOYS WIN (11:56) Jerome Turner "The DeColts are together and more impressive than ever. Could this be the end of the School of-" Three men in school uniforms suddenly burst into the ring and attack Jack and Steve in a flurry of blows. Jerome Turner "Who is that? That looks like.... John McClean? Dirty Frank?" Alex DeColt runs back down the ramp to save his brothers, but Chance and Fate join the fight. Security wade in, trying to stop the chaos. ERIC TYLER School isn't over, DeColts. School has just begun.

I'm always second guessing my finishes, but this was the only version of the match I wrote and I made the firm decision to stick with it after the incident. No rewrites. No big changes in direction. Narratively there was meat on the bone of a more ambiguous finish, or a Tyler victory, but from a business perspective I think this is the way to go. However, in the early days of the project this wasn't the plan for WrestleFestival at all. Originally Jack was going to beat Steve for the title on TV (as in canon!) and this would have been a hastily put together four way, with Bowen thrown in. The match itself was fun to write (might recycle somewhere) but nothing else about it felt right. Rushed build. Not a good main event for a marquee. I tried to jam too many plot points into too short a length of time (three months isn't as long as it looks in a spreadsheet) but wrestling needs time to sit and breathe and stretch. Not swerves for swerves sake. But that had nothing to do with Tyler. When I made that change he was still a model employee.

It's definitely the most interesting backstage hurdle that's been put in my way so far. Not that there's been much competition... Condor being salty. Julie Forletta dating someone in 4C. Drama is good. Right up until the point where it isn't. There's going to be a lot more nerves when I get to show days now. I mostly wanted an excuse to show off that picture as I legitimately love the belt design that the AI pulled out of the ether. I currently have no plans for it be defended, but Biff does have to wear it, as per the ancient rules of WrestleFestival. So the belt is in play. A potential prop I can use with the right ideas... at which point I'll pretend I planned everything like that from the beginning. Speaking of ideas I'll pretend I had from the beginning... The AI really nailed that concept. So many good images. I must have stolen this from somewhere, as it just felt too 'right'. When the major characters are in key matches, it's hard to get strong angles using the leftovers. The pie eating contests were never going to be great, but Alex cut a good promo. It's becoming apparent that he's the best talker out of the family. I did cut a few things when I realised I wouldn't have backstage cameras or carnival skits... but none of the plans would have rated too highly. As I put a bow on WrestleFestival and try to come up with a concept for the next big show, here's a few more Festival pictures I never found a place for. Plans changed, or physiques changed, or they were too outlandish to be useful.

SUNDAY WEEK 4 MARCH 1997 Red Deer, Alberta (2,891 in attendance) BARRY BOWEN VS HOWLING DOG 64 Pie Eating Contest Begins 30 900LB TAG TEAM MATCH 30 Alex DeColt Promo 74 ROCKY PSYCHO VS STEVE FLASH 58 Pie Eating Contest Ends 27 JOHN McCLEAN VS BLACK SHEEP 44 Bubbleweight Interview 44 JON JETSON VS ED MONTON 54 Locked in the Ferris Wheel 68 ERIC TYLER VS STEVE DECOLT 67 FINAL RATING 67 Ultimately I decided against broadcasting this show. I thought it would be easier to write, the lack of a televised element changed a lot of how I pictured the segments. No commentary to help transitions. Everything needed to be viewable by the fans in attendance. We might have a couple of big screens, but nothing big time or fancy) so Alex's promo moved to ringside, the Ferris Wheel lock up was viewed only from a distance, a couple of skits got cut, and... Well, I didn't change the Barnyard Match, but I definitely pictured it on its own independent set, whereas this was a smaller this close to the ring. Some obstructed views. Backstage talk is all about Eric Tyler. Remember the Go Home show? When the Matchmaking Committee voted on stipulations pitched by Steve DeColt and the Soldiers of Fortune? That wasn't supposed to happen like that. Eric Tyler was supposed to be there, closing the show with a bigger, longer segment... but he showed up drunk and had to be sent home. Luckily, the Soldiers filled in so well no one noticed (Chance literally read Tyler's lines off of a piece of paper and no one questioned it) but it did cause a lot of chaos. What if he doesn't show up to WrestleFestival? Backup plans were hatched. At least one new hire was made. Ultimately, WrestleFestival went off as planned, with only minor changes to the undercard. If Tyler hadn't shown, Jack would have stepped into the main event. Adding to the drama, Barry Bowen now hates Tyler (coincidence, but I like to believe it's related) and Tyler hates Steve for a botched spot in tonight's match. I'm not going to demonize someone for having a drinking problem.... but there may be a limit to how much I can trust Eric Tyler going forward. Especially given how much I like to write in advance. In other news, Steve Flash is done with the company. As has been suggested, he's not my kind of guy. I've never really booked him in prior games, and he's very expensive for what he brings to my table. Not local. Can't talk. No gimmick. Sure, he's popular with great matches, but he's like the tenth most interesting babyface for me to write, and as long as my main event gets a 50, I don't need bangers on the undercard. I wish him well. He works for two other promotions. He'll be fine. CGC made $15k this month. A drop in the bucket considering our losses, but a step in the right direction. Setting WrestleFestival in Alberta wasn't the most profitable decision, and I was disappointed with the number of tickets sold. Our next big event will be in British Columbia. It's amazing how much difference 4 popularity points makes to ticket sales. A thousand tickets and $18-ish a pop. Next Sunday, on Title Bout Wrestling... CGC Bubbleweight Title: Canadian Dragon vs Condor vs Jake Sloan vs Mario Heroic vs Tempest Appleby Rocky Psycho vs Howling Dog Soldiers of Fortune & Dan DaLay vs Steve, Alex & Jack DeColt

HOWLING DOG arrives to the ring on a sled pulled by adorable Huskies. Bowen tries to attack Dog before he finishes his war dance, but this time Dog sees him coming and beats him to the punch with tomahawk chops! Dog tries to finish things quick with the Star Blanket (Splash) but Bowen just barely manages to get out of harm's way. Bowen switches tracks, building momentum with sheer feats of industrial strength. He launches Dog into the air with a huge backdrop, and repeatedly rams him into the turnbuckles at alarming speeds. Summoning the courage of his spirit animal, Dog escapes a Powerbomb and goes on the warpath, but Bowen constantly charges forward. Chops won't take the train off its tracks. Dog sees a light at the end of the tunnel after a Sky High Spinebuster, but it's a Runaway Train! Train Wreck (High Velocity Shoulder Tackle)! 1... 2... 3. BARRY BOWEN WINS (12:48) PIE EATING STAGE Several wrestlers sit at a table on a stage, as referees and arena staff bring out heaps of delicious pies. JEROME TURNER is ready to kick off proceedings. JEROME TURNER Ladies and Gentlemen, the fifth annual WrestleFestival Pie Eating Contest is about to begin. With the reigning co-champions; Land Mass and Mammoth, otherwise occupied, we will crown a new champion tonight, but who will it be. Each man has 30 minutes to eat as many pies as they can, so let's get eating! BIFF THE BRUISER and MOOSE MULDER glare at each other. The bell rings and the competitors start tucking in! Looking forlornly at the Pie Eating Stage, Land Mass and Mammoth swat away their miniscule opponents, but there's just so many of them, and they just keep coming with quick tags and quicker offense. Helen's interference allows her big men to briefly isolate Sloan, but the undersized underdog overcomes the odds to make the tag! Too many dropkicks! So much flying! Mammoth tumbles out of the ring on top of Helen, and Land Mass is swarmed! Tumbleweed Elbow Drop! Flight of the Condor (Splash)! All five pile on top for the 1... 2... 3! DRAGON, CONDOR, SLOAN, APPLEBY & HEROIC WIN (5:46) RINGSIDE JULIE FORLETTA interviews ALEX DECOLT. JULIE FORLETTA Alex, you didn't get the belt earlier, but you got the victory. How do you feel? ALEX DECOLT Like this may be the greatest night of my life. A weight has been lifted from me. The spectre of Dan DaLay has been haunting me for years, but tonight proved he's not a spectre. He's just a man. He may be big and he may be strong but he's not invincible. Just like my Dad said. I didn't get the title this time, but maybe next time I will. Or the next time. Or the time after that. I'm not afraid of you any more, Dan DaLay. Come find me any time you want. You gave me a lot of beatings back in high school, and I only got revenge for one of them tonight. One down. Many more to go. But that can wait. I'm at WrestleFestival! The happiest place a DeColt can be! Time to grab some cotton candy and watch Steve do his thing in the main event. Eric Tyler's mind games couldn't beat me, and it won't beat him either. Rather than be intimidated, Flash seems to be intentionally trying to antagonize the Italian. Rocky hits a nice arm drag? Flash hits a nicer arm drag. Fancy head scissors? Fancier head scissors. Inevitably, Rocky Psycho snaps, launching himself with reckless abandon, but Flash is ready, showing remarkable resilience absorbing the punches and stomps and headbutts and having enough wits about him to dodge the cannonball dives. Psycho gets angrier. Sloppier. He hurls himself at Flash and- eats a dropkick! Another! Flash bursts into life with an explosion of strikes of his own. Rolling Wheel Kick! Leaping Neckbreaker! 1... 2... Rocky's too angry to die. Fury knowing no bounds, he counters the Flash Bang (Snap Hot Shot) with a Shotgun Dropkick and hammers Flash with punches until he's helpless. Slice of Life (Spinning Headlock Elbow Drop)! 1... 2... 3! ROCKY PSYCHO WINS (13:01) PIE EATING STAGE The Pie Eating contest is coming to an end and most of the competitors have tapped out. DIRTY FRANK and SWITCHBLADE MIKE are absolutely stuffed, unable to look at another bite. TED MOORE is enjoying some ice cream. I'm not sure he understood the rules. BATTERING LAMB is giving away pies to fans in the crowd. Only two men are left stuffing their faces. BIFF THE BRUISER and MOOSE MULDER. Equally matched at six delicious pies apiece, they glare at each other as they race to finish their seventh. The timer counts down.... 5.... 4... 3... 2... Biff the Bruiser grabs Moose's final pie and throws it into the crowd, before force feeding himself his final bite as the final buzzer blasts. BIFF THE BRUISER Yeah! I win! I win! You're all losing losers and I... I... I don't feel so... Biff runs to a trash can and violently throws up. JEROME TURNER Oh dear. What a pity. Biff the Bruiser couldn't handle his pie. That means he is disqualified and your winner is Moose Mulder! Moose tries to get up to celebrate, but he's too full of pie. He settles for waving. JEROME TURNER But don't worry, Biff. You're not going away empty handed. To celebrate your weak stomach and disqualification, you are the proud new owner of the "Poor Widdle Baby" Championship belt. Congratulations! BARNYARD SET JOHN McCLEAN enters the Barnyard... and he's wearing a full hazmat suit. McClean clumsily and awkwardly tip-toes around his filthy surroundings, while Black Sheep is perfectly at home. He ducks. He dodges. He skips over hay bales and swings on a gate to hit a dropkick. He pelts his stumbling opponent with empty beer cans and locks in a Sleeper! "Counting Sh-" BATTERING LAMB says No. He's too full of pie to run, allowing McClean to back suplex his opponent onto a hay bale. Finally getting his hands dirty, McClean throws Black Sheep around the petting zoo, before trying to drown him in the water trough. Black Sheep smears mud onto the goggles of the hazmat suit, and strips his blinded opponent down to his tighty whities. Snap Suplex into the mud! Bulldog onto a hay bale! Now absolutely covered in mud, both men trade eye pokes and hair pulling until Black Sheep hits a Flying Headbutt and drags McClean kicking and screaming towards a steaming pile of pig sh- McClean taps!!! BLACK SHEEP WINS (10:01) Referee Andy Gordy warns Black Sheep to let his opponent go... but Black Sheep doesn't play by the rules. He shoves McClean face-first into the pig poop, shoves Gordy into the water trough, cracks open a beer, and celebrates his victory as McClean flees, filthy and trying not to throw up. INTERVIEW ZONE WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS stands by with CANADIAN DRAGON, CONDOR, JAKE SLOAN, MARIO HEROIC, and TEMPEST APPLEBY. WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS Gentlemen, congratulations on your... let's call it a victory. JAKE SLOAN We may not have the size, but we had the heart and we had the brains and we had the fans here tonight. People don't always look out for the little guy, so we need to stick together, and that's exactly what we did tonight. WHIPPER SPENCER MARKS We will see if that remains true after this announcement. Earlier tonight, the CGC Matchmaking Committee assembled to decide on a brand new championship. Votes have been cast and a decision has been made. Next week on Title Bout Wrestling, CGC will crown its first ever Bubbleweight Champion, for competitors weighing 200lbs or under, and as a reward for your victory tonight, the five of you will be competing in the match. Congratulations, and good luck. The celebration stops, five look at each other with suspicion. A steel chain has been placed on a pole in the corner of the ring. Jetson immediately tries to get it, but Monton intercepts, happy to batter his former partner with his bare fists. Jetson hides behind Rogers, using a man in a wheelchair as a human shield to get the chance at a cheap shot. Rogers is fine with this. Jetson imposes his will, but every time he thinks he's delivered enough of a beating to go get the chain, double tough Monton is back up to stop him. Frustrated, Jetson throws Monton outside next to Rogers, who screams for Security to "save him from the madman". They don't help. Monton's up, throwing Jetson from the top rope and unleashing his patriotic fury! Side Canadian Legsweep! Canadian Suplex! Monton starts climbing for the chain, and Rogers starts throwing things at him. Pens. Shoes. Security step in to take him away from ringside, but the distraction is enough. Jetson yanks Ed down. Slingshot Suplex! Jetson finally gets his hands gets the chain and takes his sweet time wrapping it around his fist, savouring every moment as he swings and- Monton ducks! Fallaway Slam! Monton takes the chain! BAM! Knockout punch! 1... 2... 3. ED MONTON WINS (16:06) The main event is imminent, and the Ferris Wheel turns, bringing three compartments to the very top of the structure. FRENCHIE MARCEL waves from the first, accompanied by CGC Matchmaking Committee members BUCK HINKLEY (representing Alberta On Air) and JAMES SANDWICH (representing BCB). In the second, FATE appears to be having a minor panic attack as CHANCE tries to stop him from looking down. Hair still wet, DAN DALAY hugs his CGC Television Title Belt. In the final compartment, GEORGE DECOLT has a pair on binoculars to look at the ring, while ALEX DECOLT waves to Dan DaLay. The two fighters lock horns, and Jack calls it right down the middle, demanding clean breaks and handshakes from both sides. Steve doesn't like it, but Tyler makes a big show of abiding by the rules, thanking Jack on multiple occasions. Steve's getting frustrated, even as he struts his stuff with a backbreaker hold and powerful punches. Jack gives his brother a warning about closed fists. Steve argues and Tyler takes advantage with a neckbreaker. Tyler teaches the champion a lesson, showcasing nothing but clean cut traditional wrestling in front of the novice referee's face... while unleashing a barrage of dirty tricks behind his back. Eye-gouging. Hair-pulling. Jack sees none of it. And whenever Steve's tries to get some revenge, Tyler makes sure Jack sees it immediately to put a stop to it. Steve won't go down without a fight, however. Luscious Lariat! Sexy Slam! He teaches Tyler a few 'lessons' of his own, but Jack steps in when he goes too far with some biting. The brothers argue. Steve shoves his little brother down and Tyler takes advantage with a low blow. By the time Jack gets back up, Steve locked in the Tradition Lift (Double Chicken Wing) with Tyler demanding he tap! Steve refuses. He powers out. Headbutts! Press Slam! But Tyler ducks the Luscious Lariat and Jack gets hit by mistake! Finally, the two fighters are free to be as violent as they want to be. Eye gouging. More biting. Tyler exposes a turnbuckle and they both fight to ram the other's head into it... but Jack isn't down for long and catches them in the act! Tyler blames Steve. Steve blames Tyler. Jack doesn't know who to trust, but he does know he needs to put the turnbuckle pad back on... and as his back is turned Tyler pulls out a pair of brass knuckles and blasts Steve in the face. Jack turns back around to see the cover. 1... 2... Jack spots the knuckles on the challenger's hand. Tyler's caught red handed. He tries to deny, to distract, to claim he was framed... but Jack isn't buying it. Tyler takes a swing at him, but Steve blocks it. DeColt Thrust! Sexy Slam! Tyler tries to run but Steve hits a Running Bulldog and Jack counts the 1... 2... 3! STEVE DECOLT RETAINS THE CGC WORLD TITLE (21:11)

Speed can depend on the time of day. I usually had my best boost-free results when I'd first wake up (UK time) and would generate a bunch of images as i got ready for work. Seemed like low traffic. Other times i generate as i write. Click the button, work on a couple of sentences, check to see if it's done. Repeat. Boosts are a happy bonus, but the bulk of my work was done without them.

SUNDAY WEEK 4 MARCH 1997 Red Deer, Alberta George DeColt Introduction 88 DIRTY FRANK VS BATTERING LAMB 36 Heroes Love WrestleFestival 31 Moose vs Biff; Punching Contest 31 Jack & Eric Tyler Talk 74 ROYAL CANADIAN AIR FORCE VS CHANDLER & MAVERICK 43 Villains Hate WrestleFestival 39 Moose vs Biff; Anvil Toss 29 DeColt Family Interview 78 ALEX DECOLT VS DAN DALAY 50 Post Match Bullying 50 FINAL SHOW RATING 63 WrestleFestival continues next Sunday. Not the strongest main event. This is not the Alex DeColt & Dan DaLay of 2016. Or 2005. Young and inexperienced, DaLay struggled with the longer match (and with no Tyler at ringside, they have chemistry) and Alex isn't yet the guy to lead him. Still, it was serviceable. The strong promo segments made it a good show. Usually I would write a 'pre-show' to try to sell the upcoming main show. Like the old Sunday Night Heat. Until I realised that there's no one to sell the show to. If you're watching on TV, you're not exactly making the drive to Red Deer in time, and this isn't on pay-per-view. So I got to focus on fun and games instead of last minute promos for the midcard matches, which was freeing. Next week, I post the rest of the WrestleFestival show... CGC World Title: Eric Tyler vs Steve DeColt (Guest Referee Jack DeColt) Chain on a Pole Match: Jon Jetson vs Ed Monton Grudge Match: Barry Bowen vs Howling Dog Barnyard Bash: John McClean vs Black Sheep Frenchie's Choice: Rocky Psycho vs Steve Flash 900lbs-a-side Tag Match: Land Mass & Mammoth vs Jake Sloan & Friends Pie Eating Contest: Biff the Bruiser vs Moose Mulder

IN-RING GEORGE DECOLT When I bought this land on in 1986 everyone thought I was crazy, but I had a dream; a magical festival of fun and games, to give something back to all of the people who cheered me on during my time in the ring. Whipper thought it was impossible, but every year it's been a success, and it's all thanks to you. Every year we've added more rides. More games. Music. Comedy. And in 1991 we went from Festival to WrestleFestival with the birth of CGC. My boys have been with me every step of the way. Steve and Alex and Jack and Ricky. Each one of them were here in 1986, and each one of them are here tonight. Only this time Alex isn't taking tickets, he's fighting in the ring for the CGC Television Title. And Steve isn't working the popcorn stand, he'll be battling it out in tonight's main event. My boys have become men, and this year the George DeColt WrestleFestival has truly become the DeColt WrestleFestival. 3,359 of you have made the trip out to Red Deer this year. It's our biggest WrestleFestival crowd ever, and the best is yet to come. This is Red Deer, Alberta! This is WrestleFestival! This is DECOLT COUNTRY! DIRTY FRANK VS BATTERING LAMB Jerome Turner "Welcome to WrestleFestival. Let the combat begin!" Clothes peg on his nose, Battering Lamb battering rams his stinky opponent with shoulder tackles, until Frank steals the clothes peg and puts it in his tights. Frank assaults all five senses. Hits hard. Smells bad. Looks bad. He verbally berates his fluffy opponent and tries to put the clothes peg into Lamb's mouth... but Lamb resists! Mutton Chops! Big Leg of Lamb! Slow Roast (Torture Rack)! Frank taps! BATTERING LAMB WINS (6:25) Jerome Turner "The WrestleFestival has been rocking all weekend. Here's some of what you missed." ED MONTON hasn't even made it out of the parking lot, surrounded by kids begging for autographs. Reluctantly tied together, EDDIE CHANDLER and JOHNNY MAVERICK compete in a three-legged-race, struggling to find a rhythm while racing against fans. MARIO HEROIC, TEMPEST APPLEBY and CANADIAN DRAGON queue up for the carnival thrill ride; The Whipper-Snapper. Unfortunately, you have to be over a certain height to ride. Dragon and Heroic leave disappointed. WRESTLEFESTIVAL ARCADE A crowd has gathered to watch BIFF THE BRUISER and MOOSE MULDER compete at a Punching Machine. Biff punches so hard he gets the high score. Moose punches so hard he breaks the machine. The crowd cheer on the mighty Moose Punch! BARNYARD JULIE FORLETTA tries to interview JACK DECOLT as he holds a ladder for a crew member fixing a light. Behind them, BLACK SHEEP wanders around the barnyard set, hiding knives and broken bottles for later. Referee Andy Gordy follows him, confiscating the illegal items. JULIA FORLETTA Jack, last week you were named as Special Guest referee for tonight's World Title match. Your thoughts? JACK DECOLT Well, it's not what I hoped I'd be doing at WrestleFestival, but if the Committee voted for it, I guess I'm gonna try to be the best referee I can be. ERIC TYLER tiptoes through the mud, trying to hide his disgust at literally everything he sees. ERIC TYLER I'm sure you will be, Jack. That's exactly why I recommended you in the first place. I don't trust these CGC referees one bit. Francis Long has proven incapable of keeping Steve DeColt under control. He used an exposed turnbuckle to beat me, and he did the same to you. JACK DECOLT Steve didn't... ERIC TYLER Who else could it have been? It certainly wasn't me. I was cheering you on, Jack. As a sportsman, I want to compete against the best of the best. I would have much preferred to be taking you on tonight in honorable combat. But alas, thanks to your brother's cheating I'll have to settle for you watching my back instead. JACK DECOLT I'm not going to help you win, Mr. Tyler. ERIC TYLER Of course not. I would never ask you to do something as disgraceful as that. You'll call it right down the middle, I'm sure. In fact, I'm counting on it. Nelson Blais & Brys Turcotte ROYAL CANADIAN AIR FORCE EDDIE CHANDLER & JOHNNY MAVERICK Jerome Turner "Chandler and Maverick came shockingly close to winning the Tag Team Titles in their first match together. How will they handle this experienced team of veterans?" Eddie and Johnny are eager to work together, but they're not on the same page. Eddie only speaks French while Johnny can't help but try to hog the spotlight, and suffers a military grade beatdown from the veterans as a result. Despite a spirited flurry of forearms and a fabulous dropkick from Chandler, he accidentally knocks his own partner off the apron, and his flying crossbody is intercepted by an Anti-Air Missile (Dropkick to Flying Opponent) from Blais! 1. 2. 3. ROYAL CANADIAN AIR FORCE WIN (10:14) Jerome Turner "Not everyone is enjoying the WrestleFestival festivities. Let's see what CGC's party poopers have been up to." JON JETSON wheels ROGERS ROGERS through the parking lot, as Rogers fends off young autograph hunters with a pointy stick. A furious HELEN WHEELS struggles to walk through the mud and grass on her roller skates. All smiles, ROCKY PSYCHO throws a ball at the Coconut Shy. He misses. Everyone freezes, terrified at what his reaction will be, until the carnival worker jostles the stand. The coconut falls, and he quickly hands Rocky a gigantic stuffed animal. ANVIL TOSS BIFF THE BRUISER and MOOSE MULDER compete at who can throw anvils the furthest at the WrestleFestival Competition Grounds. Moose throws his anvil far, but Biff throws his farther, screaming and swearing as he puts in maximum effort. He celebrates boorishly to the crowd's dismay. BIFF THE BRUISER I win! You lose, you loser! MOOSE MULDER We're one-for-one, tough guy. How about we settle this once and for all? You thinking what I'm thinking? BIFF THE BRUISER Pie Eating Contest? MOOSE MULDER Pie Eating Contest! DECOLT LOCKER ROOM JULIE FORLETTA interviews ALEX DECOLT. JACK DECOLT sits on the floor, wearing a Referee shirt, reading a Big Book of Wrestling Rules. JULIE FORLETTA Alex, you are moments away from facing your childhood rival for the CGC Television Title. Are you ready? ALEX DECOLT We're about to find out. I've been afraid of Dan DaLay for so long I can't even remember a time when he didn't haunt my nightmares. It's time to wake up. It's time to grow up. It's time to pay back the fans for believing in me even when I didn't believe in myself. Jack puts his book in front of Alex's face, pointing to a word. ALEX DECOLT "Impartial" It means you can't pick favourites. STEVE DECOLT Well I'm picking favourites right now. DeColt WrestleFestival is DeColt County and I'm predicting a DeColt Clean Sweep tonight. First Alex is going to get some sweet, sweet payback. Then me and Jack are going to teach Eric Tyler a few lessons of our own. He made the mistake of a lifetime putting himself in the ring with two DeColts. JACK DECOLT Hey! I'm not going to help you. I gotta be imp- im-... This word. STEVE DECOLT I'm not saying you 'help me'... but maybe you look the other way long enough for me to jam a thumb into his eye? Revenge for all of the dirty tricks he's pulled over the years. Jack glares. STEVE DECOLT I'm joking... Mostly. JACK DECOLT I'm not going to let you cheat again! Jack storms off, rulebook in hand. STEVE DECOLT "Again"? Jack! Hold on a second... Steve follows his brother. CGC TELEVISION TITLE MATCH ALEX DECOLT VS DAN DALAY Jerome Turner "Can Alex overcome his old bully? We're about to find out." DaLay dares Alex to throw the first punch. Alex does! DaLay blocks, but Alex ducks the counter and punches the bully right in the face! DaLay laughs. So Alex hits him again. And again. DaLay goes from laughter to covering up to taking his own swings. Alex uses his speed to stay out of harm's way, rocks the giant with powerful punches and- Big Boot! DaLay floors him. He bullies Alex around the ring with noogies and wet-willies and Alex starts to panic. Every attempt at fighting back becomes more desperate and unfocussed than the last, shut down by a clubbing blow or Big Boot. Summoning up all of his courage... Alex runs away. DaLay finds this hilarious, taunting as Alex cowers at ringside, DaLay sees a great opportunity to charge him into the- It's a trap! Alex dodges and DaLay crashes into the ringpost! Right hands! DeColt Thrust! He dodges the Big Boot! Powerslam! Snap Driving Elbow! DaLay is rattled, and Alex gives him a taste of his own medicine. Noogies! Purple nurples! Referee Francis Long steps in to stop the atomic wedgie, and DaLay takes advantage of the momentary distraction with a Spinebuster! Senton! 1... 2... Alex kicks out and DaLay needs to think fast. Tyler isn't there to provide instructions. Top Rope? Good idea? Bad idea. Alex catches him climbing. Superplex! Alex calls for the Iron Claw and... Dan DaLay runs away. Unlike Alex, this is no trap. He flees the ring as fast as he can, taking his belt with him. ALEX DECOLT WINS VIA COUNT OUT (14:11) DaLay may have had enough, but Alex hasn't. He gives chase into the crowd as his former bully scrambles to get away. Through the crowd. Past the popcorn stand. Through the arcade. Security have their hands full keeping the fans out of harm's way. Finally, Alex corners him in the toilets. With a triumphant yell, Alex shoves DaLay's head in the toilet and gives him a swirly, as Security try to pry them apart. Jerome Turner "For those of you watching at home, we'll see you next week, but for the three thousand here in Red Deer, WrestleFestival continues!"

My interpretations of Fawn Keyes & Summer Bouffant. Two AA rookies with a ton of potential, who just can't get out of their own/each other's way. Move stealing. Tracksuit stealing. Boyfriend stealing. I'm three months into my diary game, and one of them has already been fired in disgrace from AAA. Fawn's original picture doesn't have a ponytail, but... I don't know. It just seemed right. Not sure why.

I'm a fan of all of those teams. If I had the budget and the TV time and the writing time I'd hire all of them. In my private games they all come in eventually. G-Force are maybe too much of a project for right now, and I have several blonde, muscular babyfaces already, not to mention other babyface teams. I have ideas for the Edmonton Outlaws, but not the TV time to execute. I would have to make room in my spreadsheets and scripts to feature them, whereas RCAF fit into the blank spaces that already exist. The fact that they don't scream 'stars' is a feature, not a bug. It turns them into valuable and versatile utility players in my eyes. When my stars are jacked up muscle men and scary monsters, you need some bland workhorses to act as a foundation. Experience. Performance skills. Small enough to actually bump for their opponents. Love it. Plus Nelson Blais lives fairly close by. Everyone else is in eastern Canada. You would be stunned how often travel can make or break careers when I'm put in charge.