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Mother's Day


Trashbear

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So, Mother's Day is upon us, at least in America.

 

I love my mother (and my father, for that matter). But other mothers? I'm fairly indifferent. To put it another way, I don't give a **** about your mom.

 

I don't mean to sound crass (actually, I do). What I mean is, don't expect me to wish you a happy Mother's Day just because you're a mom. How do I know you didn't suck as a mother? Even if you didn't, what the hell do I care?

 

Apparently, this makes me a caveman a-hole. My fiancee stared daggers through me this morning because I didn't wish her father's girlfriend a happy Mother's Day. I simply responded "She's not my mom. Let her kids call her and tell her." Not the appropriate response, apparently.

 

So yeah. Love your mom, and I'll love mine, and never the twain shall meet.

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Apparently, this makes me a caveman a-hole. My fiancee stared daggers through me this morning because I didn't wish her father's girlfriend a happy Mother's Day. I simply responded "She's not my mom. Let her kids call her and tell her." Not the appropriate response, apparently.

 

It's not. Look, I can be about as crass and dismissive as anyone I know and even I see the basic nicety that comes with this particular "holiday". I have many, many friends who are mothers and so I wind up having to say (or type) it two dozen times today. The whole "you're not my mother so you don't count" line of thinking is just emo, in my view. No offense. :)

 

When you consider the impact a good mother can have on society overall, it kinda makes you want to laud the good ones (and stone the bad ones, but I digress). From that point of view, I can see your side. So I make the distinction as, you give gifts to the good ones, while the bad (or indifferent) ones get a largely meaningless 'Happy Mother's Day'. That at least prevents daggers from being stared through you while also making you appear courteous and civil. :p

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I get both sides.

 

Why the hell do I get Happy Mothers day wishes when I'm not a mother?

 

I have gitten phone calls, I.Ms, and texts. The weirdest one came from my father. :confused:

 

Um, cuz you have a uterus? :confused:

 

Maybe they're Happy Mother's Days in advance. :p

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It's not. Look, I can be about as crass and dismissive as anyone I know and even I see the basic nicety that comes with this particular "holiday". I have many, many friends who are mothers and so I wind up having to say (or type) it two dozen times today. The whole "you're not my mother so you don't count" line of thinking is just emo, in my view. No offense. :)

 

When you consider the impact a good mother can have on society overall, it kinda makes you want to laud the good ones (and stone the bad ones, but I digress). From that point of view, I can see your side. So I make the distinction as, you give gifts to the good ones, while the bad (or indifferent) ones get a largely meaningless 'Happy Mother's Day'. That at least prevents daggers from being stared through you while also making you appear courteous and civil. :p

 

My complaint is pretty much one of annoyance/laziness. It's more of a "Look, you take care of your mom and I'll take care of my mom." Just...I don't want to worry about whether or not someone is expecting a call from me just because:

 

1. I know her.

 

2. She is someone's (not my) mother.

 

So I guess you could say my line of thinking is more...nihilistic? "We believe in nothing, Lebowski," type stuff. Emo is not my deal :p My perspective has been "Mother's Day is for celebrating your mother, provided she's worth celebrating. Not all mothers." Perhaps this is where you and I differ.

 

But yeah, good moms are important, I guess that one is pretty widely agreed upon. I just don't want to talk to all of them. Or my mother in law to be.

 

EDIT: I suppose I should point out that my immediate family doesn't really make much (if any) fuss on Mother's Day. My mother once asked me, only a few years ago, "What do I care about one day? I know you love me, and you do things for me all the time." Which is true. Example: Today, she and my father are at our property in Maine, totally off the grid. She only realized it was Mother's Day weekend when I pointed it out last week. She just shrugged and smiled. "Oh well."

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EDIT: I suppose I should point out that my immediate family doesn't really make much (if any) fuss on Mother's Day. My mother once asked me, only a few years ago, "What do I care about one day? I know you love me, and you do things for me all the time." Which is true. Example: Today, she and my father are at our property in Maine, totally off the grid. She only realized it was Mother's Day weekend when I pointed it out last week. She just shrugged and smiled. "Oh well."

 

I almost take offense to that! :p

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Over here in England we do it properly. :p Mother's day (or Mothering Sunday as it's officially known) is a celebration of YOUR mother (and sometimes your grandmother). Not any female in the country who has a kid or looks like they might be pregnant.

 

The idea of wishing someone else's mum a Happy Mother's Day is just weird...

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