Diary Preview Thread

[Basmat01]

Would another USPW diary be to much? I know there is already a few of them floating around and ive been thinking of have a crack at one due to my Love for the company

[Nedew]

Would another USPW diary be to much? I know there is already a few of them floating around and ive been thinking of have a crack at one due to my Love for the company

 

It's always good to have variations on the same thing, it shows the different ways to take company. But if you do go ahead with it, make sure you do just that - if you end up doing exactly the same thing as another USPW diary, it'll get very old very fast. It's got to be original.

[Phantom Stranger]

"What!!!? Get me their contracts!" Eisen yelped upon hearing the news that two of his most promising stars, Brandon James and Jack Giedroyc were activating a clause in their contract. A clause that, in the event of DaVE re-opening it's doors with Phil Vibert and John 'Nemesis' Campbell, allows them to leave the SWF with no repercussions should they decide they want to go back to DaVE.

 

---

 

What I'm wondering is whether or not this is good enough to continue with? Do you think people would want to read it? Is the backstory decent enough?

 

To be honest, you lose my suspension of disbelief in that opening paragraph.

 

'Big Money' Brandon James starts the game with close to as good a contract as anyone. High wages, locked down for three years, creative control.

 

It's pretty much unthinkable to me that Richard Eisen would allow a contract like that to go out with a clause that would have to be specially inserted that, frankly, reeks of loophole. Especially if he'd already signed Jack Giedroyc with the same contract. Or if he were negotiating with any other DaVE names who eventually went to TCW and asked for the same clause.

 

And Tommy Cornell might well let one slide, assuming it were a joke. But the second guy to say it would at least raise alarm bells. Maybe he'd let that second guy have it.

 

But the third? The fourth? The fifth?

 

It just doesn't make much sense to me.

[UkWrestleFan]

To be honest, you lose my suspension of disbelief in that opening paragraph.

 

'Big Money' Brandon James starts the game with close to as good a contract as anyone. High wages, locked down for three years, creative control.

 

It's pretty much unthinkable to me that Richard Eisen would allow a contract like that to go out with a clause that would have to be specially inserted that, frankly, reeks of loophole. Especially if he'd already signed Jack Giedroyc with the same contract. Or if he were negotiating with any other DaVE names who eventually went to TCW and asked for the same clause.

 

And Tommy Cornell might well let one slide, assuming it were a joke. But the second guy to say it would at least raise alarm bells. Maybe he'd let that second guy have it.

 

But the third? The fourth? The fifth?

 

It just doesn't make much sense to me.

 

Thanks, Phantom Stranger, that's all I needed

 

I came up with the idea while at work, bored, with nothing to do so I'm not surprised it sux donkeys balls.

[Self]

It's written pretty well, but it's a bit of a car-crash of cliche's. Lottery winner + Vibert + Nemesis. Feels very familiar to me, although DAVE as a company probably wouldn't. I haven't read any DAVE diaries, like... ever.

[UkWrestleFan]

It's written pretty well, but it's a bit of a car-crash of cliche's. Lottery winner + Vibert + Nemesis. Feels very familiar to me, although DAVE as a company probably wouldn't. I haven't read any DAVE diaries, like... ever.

 

Yeah, I thought the same when reading it back but still nothing wrong with getting a bit of feedback, eh?

 

And glad you think it's written quite well, cheers

[Liamo]

I've been thinking about doing an(?) HGC diary for a while (I even posted a preview image earlier in the thread somewhere) and I've finally started doing a backstory. This is the first part (possibly second, I've got some ideas roaming around at the moment) and I'd like some feedback:

 

***

 

OCTOBER 1996

LOS ANGELES, CA

 

“James, can you come in here for a moment?”

 

Kohler’s boss caught him off guard. He looked up from his desk and saw his boss peering around the doorway of his office on the far side of the room. His tone was noticeably different to his usual, aggressive and husky self. It was almost sombre. Kohler rose slowly from his chair and looked around the room at his colleagues staring back at him, seemingly noticing the difference in the boss’ voice.

 

“Think he’s realised I’ve been stealing staples?” Kohler joked as he made his way towards the office door. He entered the room and looked inquisitively at Mr. Stallings.

 

“Close the door,” and ordered, resting his elbows on the table. “Then take a seat.”

 

Obediently, Kohler closed the door and slowly took a seat.

 

“What’s this about, sir?” Kohler tried to sound as genuine as he could. Even though he was being perfectly genuine, he had an uncanny knack of sounding sarcastic at all times. Stallings took a deep breath, clearly shaken. “Is everything alright?”

 

“Ye... yeah, everything f... fine,” Stallings stammered after an awkward silence for what seemed like an eternity.

 

“You don’t sound too sure, sir. I mean, that was barely a sentence...”

Stallings sighed and leaned back in his chair. Now Kohler was sure he’d done something wrong.

 

“Look, if this about those staples I...”

 

“No, n... Staples?” Stallings raised an eyebrow. “I’m afraid it’s a lot more serious than that, James.”

More serious than staples? Kohler thought. Surely not...

 

“I’m... err... rich...” he finally blurted out.

 

“Rich?”

 

“Well, not me, per say...” he continued. “Remember I was telling you at Debra’s birthday party that Junior was spending all of his free time working on some computer programme in his bedroom and I was worried about him?”

 

“Oh... Err, yeah, sure, yeah...” Kohler lied, only vaguely remembering the party at all and not realising that Stallings was there at all. He suspected Stallings could somehow tell, he be didn’t seem to care.

 

“It only ****ing works!” Stallings laughed, slapping his hands down on the desk and making Kohler noticeably jump. “And young Junior’s sold the damn thing for... guess how much!”

 

“Err...” Kohler muttered, shrugging and shaking his head.

 

“Three... hundred... million... dollars!” he whispered, a huge grin spreading across his face.

 

“Three... HUNDRED... MILLION... DOLLARS!” he repeated, the volume of his voice rising with every syllable and making the people in the office outside his door look over curiously. “I’m in the goddamn money, James, I’m in the goddamn money!”

 

“Why are you telling me this, sir?” Kohler asked tentatively. “I mean, that’s great and all but...”

 

“Come over the house tonight,” Stallings said, seemingly dodging the question entirely. I’ve got something I want to run by you...”

 

“Err... okay,” Kohler agreed.

 

“And bring the wife!” The smile on Stallings face grew even wider, almost coming across creepy. “We’re going to have a celebrating!”

 

“Oh, okay... I’ll come round about... eight?”

 

“Yeah, you do that!” Stallings said chuckling and placing his feet on the desk. “You can get back to work for now, James.”

 

“Alright...” Kohler replied, rising from his chair and heading for the door. He slowly opened the door and glanced back as his boss started signing his own rendition of ‘We’re in the Money’. He closed the door on his way out and made his way back to his desk.

 

He stroked his chin thoughtfully, seemingly not noticing the whole office staring at him, looking for answers.

 

Something to run by me? There's three hundred million reasons why I go...

[G-Prime]

The crowd was tense. I could feel it. I could hear them behind me. Next to me. All around me. This was it. Make or break. And I was sitting here, watching it first-hand. Not from Crippler Position with the Chief. Not on a monitor in Richard's office. I was in the crowd. I had to be. This was my moment. This was what I'd been building toward since Richard had let me run with the World Heavyweight Championship feud.

 

Jack Bruce, the defending champion, had been slugging it out with Vengeance inside the Supreme Cell for at least twenty minutes. By my math, they were about to build up to the finish.

And here we go... Jack Bruce tries to go for his signature triple-vertical suplex, the Long Island Trio, but can't quite lift the big man. Vengeance lifts Bruce up for the Skull Krusher piledriver. The crowd boos as Vengeance crosses Bruce's arms, before making the pin attempt. One... Two... Th- NO! The crowd erupts. Vengeance can't believe it. He picks Bruce up, for another Skull Krusher, but Bruce wriggles out, going blow-for-blow with Vengeance. NEW YORK MINUTE! Out of nowhere, Jack Bruce hits his Fame Dropper, putting the monster down. The crowd joins in... ONE!... TWO!... THRE-BOOOOOOOOO!!! Vengeance sits up.

The two trade blows once more, Vengeance landing a particularly nasty haymaker, which stuns Bruce long enough for Vengeance to lift him up to the second turnbuckle. The crowd are on the edge of their seats. Vengeance only brought out the Six Feet Under chokeslam when he wanted to really hurt someone. It looks as though Bruce knows this too, he begins punching the demon in the face. Vengeance lets go, and Bruce lands a nasty kick to the big man's jaw, sending him sprawling to the ground. Bruce climbs up to the top turnbuckle and shouts: "WELCOME TO..." He leaps off the top rope, landing an elbow drop, as the crowd shouts "N!" He staggers back to the corner, and struggles up the ropes. "Y!" The crowd shouts, as he lands the legdrop. The crowd are ecstatic. They know what comes next. Bruce is back up the turnbuckle, a little slower than before. He leaps from the top rope and lands the splash right on his opponent's chest. "C!" The crowd finishes. Bruce lays on top of his opponent, as the ref, the crowd, the announcers, and everyone watching at home count ONE!... TWO!... THREE!

 

Jack Bruce has finally done it. He finally beat Vengeance cleanly, and it only took three shots at it. The first time they met for Bruce's title, at Nothing to Lose, Vengeance spazzed out, and got disqualified. The second time, at Awesome Impact 2008, Christian Faith had saved Bruce from being hospitalised the second time, giving Vengeance the DQ victory this time. Bruce had demanded he be locked in the Cell with Vengeance, at The World is Watching, so they could sort it out one-on-one. And they had. The crowd were elated. They'd just watched one hell of a show.

 

Christian Faith ran down to the ring to celebrate with his friend, ever-present briefcase in hand. The two share a moment in the ring. Jack Bruce had finally beaten Vengeance. Faith helps Bruce to his feet and raises his hand. The crowd cheer.

 

But the cheer cuts short, when Christian Faith slams his steel briefcase down on Bruce's head. Bruce collapses. Faith drops the case, and lifts Bruce up, for a DDT onto the steel.

Faith grabs referee Darren Smith, and hands him the briefcase. From the front row, I can clearly hear him say "Open it! I'm taking my shot now!"

Smith is in disbelief, as is the entire crowd. The arena is silent. Smith shakes his head, as he opens up the case. He signals for the bell to be rung.

 

Faith leaps on top of Bruce, and Smith begrudgingly drops to his knees. One... His count is slow... Two... Surely Bruce is completely unco- NO! Bruce kicks out! The crowd are on their feet, screaming at the top of their lungs! There's fight in the champion yet!

Faith is livid. He starts berating Darren Smith. Jack Bruce hits him from behind with a weak punch. Faith turns around and spits in his face. Bruce knocks Faith down with a thunderous clothesline. Faith leaps back to his feet. He looks impressed, but wary. The two lock up in the middle of the ring. Bruce drops Faith with an armdrag. Faith looks visibly shaken. The crowd are loving it. They trade blows in the middle of the ring, before Faith somehow hotshots Jack Bruce's neck on the ropes. Faith hits a Faith Hammer on the stunned Bruce, leaving the champion staggering into the corner... Leap of Faith! Faith rolls Bruce up. 1...2.. No! How is the champion even breathing? Over 20 minutes of hell in the Supreme Cell with Vengeance, followed by a shot to the head with a heavy, steel briefcase, followed by a DDT onto the steel, and now two of Christian Faith's signature moves?

Faith turns to the referee again, shouting at him for an apparently slow count. Bruce takes out Faith's legs, but accidentally knocks him into the referee. Smith goes flying out through the ropes. Faith grabs his briefcase from the corner and hits Bruce with a sickening thud. Bruce's eyes glaze over, and he hits the deck. Faith then puts Bruce's head in the case, slamming it shut on his head again and again and again. Bruce's already bloody face is completely covered now. Faith tosses the case aside, before lifting Bruce's lifeless form up and locking in the Test of Faith. The crowd boos loudly, as Faith's sleeper hold is pretty much irrelevant at this point. Smith is back in the ring. He lifts Bruce's hand, it drops. And again.The crowd are on the edge of their seats. If Bruce's hand drops again, he loses. If he manages to keep it up, the match continues. Smith lifts Bruce's hand... The crowd holds it's breath... The hand falls limply to his side, and Smith rings the bell.

 

"Here is your winner..." Jerry Eisen is in awe. Hell, I'm in awe, and I booked the whole thing... "And new SWF Heavyweight Champion of the World... Christian Faith."

For a moment, the crowd isn't sure what to do. Jack Bruce just lost the title... By knockout. After his best friend turned on him. That moment isn't long though, as a full-scale riot breaks out around me. Chairs, bottles, cans, cups and everything available is tossed at the Supreme Cell. I congratulate myself on the choice of stipulation. At least Christian and Bruce were safe inside. A quick glance over at the announce desk, and I see Duane and Phil getting grabbed by security, and led out through the crowd. Another guard grabs Jerry and the timekeeper from their position. No guard for me though. i guess Richard didn't tell them I was out here. Good thing nobody knows me. Unless there're any Triple A fans in the crowd. I stand up and rush up the stairs, to the nearest exit.

 

I meet up with the announce team on their way backstage.

"Holy sh*t kid, I can't believe it." Phil said. "Even Nemesis trying to crucify Caulfield never got that reaction from a New Hampshire crowd!"

"We're going to die!" Jerry added.

We reached the backstage area, flashed our passes to the guards, and headed in.

 

Richard was waiting for us.

"Kate... Garden Security just called the cops in. Bruce, Faith and Smith are locked in the Cell, because the fans won't let Faith out. The fans are on the arena floor, crowding the Cell. They want blood." Eisen doesn't look happy.

"But... I... But..." I stammer.

"I hired you as a favour to Amanda, while you were injured last year. You needed a job, I brought you in as a road agent. You asked to try to book, I allowed it, a trial run. Well, the experiment is over." Eisen's expression softens. "You're the new head booker."

I stare at him in shock. "But... But... What about Peter?"

"Peter Michaels has been suspended twice in the last four months. Everyone in that locker room hates him. And not to mention I haven't seen a reaction to a turn like that since... I don't even know when."

Phil claps me on the shoulder, as does Duane. "Thank you sir... I won't let you down."

"I know you won't. Because, my daughter's best friend or not, you'd just end up like Keith." Richard says.

"Main-eventing in the second biggest company in the world?" Vibert asked.

"No, fired. Like anyone else who pisses me off." Eisen shoots Vibert a hard look. "But that won't be a problem, will it honey?"

"No Mr Eisen sir!" I say.

"Miss Kate Avatar, what have I told you about that? Call me Richard."

"Of course sir."

 

<><><>

 

TL;DR?

Kate Avatar, former contender to the Femme Fatale title, is now head booker of SWF. She's best friends with Richard Eisen's non-wrestling related daughter Amanda (may or may not have been lifted from Bigpapa's awesome SWF diary, as was the Supreme Cell, and Crippler Position... but I digress).

It's a game in progress, I just finished booking the Supreme TV episode after The World is Watching. Hopefully I'll get started on it soon, but I really shouldn't make any promises. (I'm pretty sure I'm still technically on hiatus from the WWE Rebirth sequel, and there's my other writing projects...)

Anyway, any comments?

[UkWrestleFan]

The crowd was tense. I could feel it. I could hear them behind me. Next to me. All around me. This was it. Make or break. And I was sitting here, watching it first-hand. Not from Crippler Position with the Chief. Not on a monitor in Richard's office. I was in the crowd. I had to be. This was my moment. This was what I'd been building toward since Richard had let me run with the World Heavyweight Championship feud.

 

Jack Bruce, the defending champion, had been slugging it out with Vengeance inside the Supreme Cell for at least twenty minutes. By my math, they were about to build up to the finish.

And here we go... Jack Bruce tries to go for his signature triple-vertical suplex, the Long Island Trio, but can't quite lift the big man. Vengeance lifts Bruce up for the Skull Krusher piledriver. The crowd boos as Vengeance crosses Bruce's arms, before making the pin attempt. One... Two... Th- NO! The crowd erupts. Vengeance can't believe it. He picks Bruce up, for another Skull Krusher, but Bruce wriggles out, going blow-for-blow with Vengeance. NEW YORK MINUTE! Out of nowhere, Jack Bruce hits his Fame Dropper, putting the monster down. The crowd joins in... ONE!... TWO!... THRE-BOOOOOOOOO!!! Vengeance sits up.

The two trade blows once more, Vengeance landing a particularly nasty haymaker, which stuns Bruce long enough for Vengeance to lift him up to the second turnbuckle. The crowd are on the edge of their seats. Vengeance only brought out the Six Feet Under chokeslam when he wanted to really hurt someone. It looks as though Bruce knows this too, he begins punching the demon in the face. Vengeance lets go, and Bruce lands a nasty kick to the big man's jaw, sending him sprawling to the ground. Bruce climbs up to the top turnbuckle and shouts: "WELCOME TO..." He leaps off the top rope, landing an elbow drop, as the crowd shouts "N!" He staggers back to the corner, and struggles up the ropes. "Y!" The crowd shouts, as he lands the legdrop. The crowd are ecstatic. They know what comes next. Bruce is back up the turnbuckle, a little slower than before. He leaps from the top rope and lands the splash right on his opponent's chest. "C!" The crowd finishes. Bruce lays on top of his opponent, as the ref, the crowd, the announcers, and everyone watching at home count ONE!... TWO!... THREE!

 

Jack Bruce has finally done it. He finally beat Vengeance cleanly, and it only took three shots at it. The first time they met for Bruce's title, at Nothing to Lose, Vengeance spazzed out, and got disqualified. The second time, at Awesome Impact 2008, Christian Faith had saved Bruce from being hospitalised the second time, giving Vengeance the DQ victory this time. Bruce had demanded he be locked in the Cell with Vengeance, at The World is Watching, so they could sort it out one-on-one. And they had. The crowd were elated. They'd just watched one hell of a show.

 

Christian Faith ran down to the ring to celebrate with his friend, ever-present briefcase in hand. The two share a moment in the ring. Jack Bruce had finally beaten Vengeance. Faith helps Bruce to his feet and raises his hand. The crowd cheer.

 

But the cheer cuts short, when Christian Faith slams his steel briefcase down on Bruce's head. Bruce collapses. Faith drops the case, and lifts Bruce up, for a DDT onto the steel.

Faith grabs referee Darren Smith, and hands him the briefcase. From the front row, I can clearly hear him say "Open it! I'm taking my shot now!"

Smith is in disbelief, as is the entire crowd. The arena is silent. Smith shakes his head, as he opens up the case. He signals for the bell to be rung.

 

Faith leaps on top of Bruce, and Smith begrudgingly drops to his knees. One... His count is slow... Two... Surely Bruce is completely unco- NO! Bruce kicks out! The crowd are on their feet, screaming at the top of their lungs! There's fight in the champion yet!

Faith is livid. He starts berating Darren Smith. Jack Bruce hits him from behind with a weak punch. Faith turns around and spits in his face. Bruce knocks Faith down with a thunderous clothesline. Faith leaps back to his feet. He looks impressed, but wary. The two lock up in the middle of the ring. Bruce drops Faith with an armdrag. Faith looks visibly shaken. The crowd are loving it. They trade blows in the middle of the ring, before Faith somehow hotshots Jack Bruce's neck on the ropes. Faith hits a Faith Hammer on the stunned Bruce, leaving the champion staggering into the corner... Leap of Faith! Faith rolls Bruce up. 1...2.. No! How is the champion even breathing? Over 20 minutes of hell in the Supreme Cell with Vengeance, followed by a shot to the head with a heavy, steel briefcase, followed by a DDT onto the steel, and now two of Christian Faith's signature moves?

Faith turns to the referee again, shouting at him for an apparently slow count. Bruce takes out Faith's legs, but accidentally knocks him into the referee. Smith goes flying out through the ropes. Faith grabs his briefcase from the corner and hits Bruce with a sickening thud. Bruce's eyes glaze over, and he hits the deck. Faith then puts Bruce's head in the case, slamming it shut on his head again and again and again. Bruce's already bloody face is completely covered now. Faith tosses the case aside, before lifting Bruce's lifeless form up and locking in the Test of Faith. The crowd boos loudly, as Faith's sleeper hold is pretty much irrelevant at this point. Smith is back in the ring. He lifts Bruce's hand, it drops. And again.The crowd are on the edge of their seats. If Bruce's hand drops again, he loses. If he manages to keep it up, the match continues. Smith lifts Bruce's hand... The crowd holds it's breath... The hand falls limply to his side, and Smith rings the bell.

 

"Here is your winner..." Jerry Eisen is in awe. Hell, I'm in awe, and I booked the whole thing... "And new SWF Heavyweight Champion of the World... Christian Faith."

For a moment, the crowd isn't sure what to do. Jack Bruce just lost the title... By knockout. After his best friend turned on him. That moment isn't long though, as a full-scale riot breaks out around me. Chairs, bottles, cans, cups and everything available is tossed at the Supreme Cell. I congratulate myself on the choice of stipulation. At least Christian and Bruce were safe inside. A quick glance over at the announce desk, and I see Duane and Phil getting grabbed by security, and led out through the crowd. Another guard grabs Jerry and the timekeeper from their position. No guard for me though. i guess Richard didn't tell them I was out here. Good thing nobody knows me. Unless there're any Triple A fans in the crowd. I stand up and rush up the stairs, to the nearest exit.

 

I meet up with the announce team on their way backstage.

"Holy sh*t kid, I can't believe it." Phil said. "Even Nemesis trying to crucify Caulfield never got that reaction from a New Hampshire crowd!"

"We're going to die!" Jerry added.

We reached the backstage area, flashed our passes to the guards, and headed in.

 

Richard was waiting for us.

"Kate... Garden Security just called the cops in. Bruce, Faith and Smith are locked in the Cell, because the fans won't let Faith out. The fans are on the arena floor, crowding the Cell. They want blood." Eisen doesn't look happy.

"But... I... But..." I stammer.

"I hired you as a favour to Amanda, while you were injured last year. You needed a job, I brought you in as a road agent. You asked to try to book, I allowed it, a trial run. Well, the experiment is over." Eisen's expression softens. "You're the new head booker."

I stare at him in shock. "But... But... What about Peter?"

"Peter Michaels has been suspended twice in the last four months. Everyone in that locker room hates him. And not to mention I haven't seen a reaction to a turn like that since... I don't even know when."

Phil claps me on the shoulder, as does Duane. "Thank you sir... I won't let you down."

"I know you won't. Because, my daughter's best friend or not, you'd just end up like Keith." Richard says.

"Main-eventing in the second biggest company in the world?" Vibert asked.

"No, fired. Like anyone else who pisses me off." Eisen shoots Vibert a hard look. "But that won't be a problem, will it honey?"

"No Mr Eisen sir!" I say.

"Miss Kate Avatar, what have I told you about that? Call me Richard."

"Of course sir."

 

<><><>

 

TL;DR?

Kate Avatar, former contender to the Femme Fatale title, is now head booker of SWF. She's best friends with Richard Eisen's non-wrestling related daughter Amanda (may or may not have been lifted from Bigpapa's awesome SWF diary, as was the Supreme Cell, and Crippler Position... but I digress).

It's a game in progress, I just finished booking the Supreme TV episode after The World is Watching. Hopefully I'll get started on it soon, but I really shouldn't make any promises. (I'm pretty sure I'm still technically on hiatus from the WWE Rebirth sequel, and there's my other writing projects...)

Anyway, any comments?

 

:eek:

 

That. Was. Awesome.

[Self]

Formatting could use a little work, and anyone with the surname "Avatar" is pretty much a turn off for me, but a cool scene, no question.

[FINisher]

.. and anyone with the surname "Avatar" is pretty much a turn off for me.

 

This is a huge turn-off for me too. I can never understand why oh why can't people create their own user characters. It isn't that hard. And just the name Kate/Jack Avatar.. Ughh.

[Eisen-verse]

This is a huge turn-off for me too. I can never understand why oh why can't people create their own user characters. It isn't that hard. And just the name Kate/Jack Avatar.. Ughh.

 

Agreed. It kind of leaves a bad taste in your mouth when you see the Avatar's being used. I see why it would be easier to just go ahead with the pre-set characters but I tend to have just as much fun creating my own user character than creating other wrestler's personas.

 

Then again, my user character in my X-WA Diary is just a shadowy figure that doesn't really even any skills at all. Wanted to focus more on the characters I had on my roster than myself. haha.

[Self]

Then again, my user character in my X-WA Diary is just a shadowy figure that doesn't really even any skills at all. Wanted to focus more on the characters I had on my roster than myself. haha.

 

Usually I'm of the exact same mindset. That was my original plan for my FCK diary, except I had this Uriel gimmick all written up and ready to go, but the guy I drafted to play the part just wasn't suitable for it (though there's a alt I should probably post one day). Sadly, because I'm so uncomfortable pushing User Characters, Uriel is dying a slow death. A shame. I had a nice arc all plotted out for him.

[Eisen-verse]

Usually I'm of the exact same mindset. That was my original plan for my FCK diary, except I had this Uriel gimmick all written up and ready to go, but the guy I drafted to play the part just wasn't suitable for it (though there's a alt I should probably post one day). Sadly, because I'm so uncomfortable pushing User Characters, Uriel is dying a slow death. A shame. I had a nice arc all plotted out for him.

 

I'm much in the same... I can get myself to push any sort of user character... Even as a manager. It just seems like I'm cheating the Cornellverse in a way. That's also why I don't create any wrestlers in game as I would rather keep it to the game itself... A Cornellverse purist I guess. ha

[Nedew]

I'm much in the same... I can get myself to push any sort of user character... Even as a manager. It just seems like I'm cheating the Cornellverse in a way. That's also why I don't create any wrestlers in game as I would rather keep it to the game itself... A Cornellverse purist I guess. ha

 

I think this sums up my attitude completely. If it's not Ryland-approved canon, i've got no interest! I even struggle with '97 and '75, the likes of Dusty Streets and such just weren't thought up by god, dammnit!

[Eisen-verse]

I think this sums up my attitude completely. If it's not Ryland-approved canon, i've got no interest! I even struggle with '97 and '75, the likes of Dusty Streets and such just weren't thought up by god, dammnit!

 

Amen. ha

[Jaded]

G-Prime - awesome, awesome stuff! Really hoping to read more.

[Liamo]

What about my feedback

[James Casey]

Well, the concept of your character being the head booker of HGC or whatever is interesting, but it's hard to make any other conclusions based on what you've presented.

 

Well written, though - decent grammar, paragraph breaks, punctuation is good. Things that can kill a diary for me (regardless of content) all present and correct

[Liamo]

Thanks, I was looking for opinions on the writting style/grammar more then content at the moment as I've got a pretty good idea where I want to go with it.

 

Sorry if I seemed a little crass or whatever, I just felt a little overlooked

[Bigpapa42]

Been thinking of doing a diary in which DaVE makes a comeback. Here is a rough draft of what I had so far....

 

Dave: the Revival is going to tough to write, to be honest. Maybe not to write so much as to have it sit "right" with your readers. With the re-opening the doors idea, rich new backer, etc, its going to feel like a lot of the start-up promotion diaries we have on here. And some of those are very very well done, so that's tough competition. You may also turn some people off by "stealing back" the major talent that left. Not saying that it can't work, just that it might be tough slugging, especially off the start.

 

This is also just opinion, but what might be easier to have readers buy into is something like Dave: Still Surviving. It would take some re-writing of the initial data, but basically the idea could be that DaVE almost went under in April of 2007 but managed to survive. They clawed through by releasing some of their biggers names, who end up at SWF and TCW, just like they did. But some stayed - just one or two of the "big" names. They would be complimented by the veteran core (mostly the guys now at PSW) and some cheap young guys. Maybe Vibert realizes he has to build a new generation of stars. Maybe Nemesis has brought in his son and is determined to make him a star. I think a story like that would be more appealing all-around. Plus, the backstory of just how the promotion survived a very lean summer and fall would make for some intriguing backstory, at least more intriguing than the standard "won a lottery" idea.

 

TL;DR?

Kate Avatar, former contender to the Femme Fatale title, is now head booker of SWF. She's best friends with Richard Eisen's non-wrestling related daughter Amanda (may or may not have been lifted from Bigpapa's awesome SWF diary, as was the Supreme Cell, and Crippler Position... but I digress).

It's a game in progress, I just finished booking the Supreme TV episode after The World is Watching. Hopefully I'll get started on it soon, but I really shouldn't make any promises. (I'm pretty sure I'm still technically on hiatus from the WWE Rebirth sequel, and there's my other writing projects...)

Anyway, any comments?

 

That, my friend, is some very solid writing. And I love that you liked some of the little details from my vision of SWF enough to use them. I always had fun including those kind of things and hoped the readers picked up on them and appreciated them. So that's awesome. Feel free to use any other such details from Gen Supreme.

 

As for the diary, I would be reading. Definitely.

[Dragonmack]

As I stated in my recently officially closed diary, my time has gone to other things besides TEW for the past few months, but I still lurk around. And even though my CGC diary has run it's course, I do still have ideas. Although I don't know how much time I will have for it , I did develop one idea enough to give a preview of a potential next diary for me and my David Mack avatar.

 

 

 

 

Six months. It had been six months since it happened. Six months since a man I thought I could trust had stabbed me in the back! The worst part is I should have seen it coming. I had allowed myself to believe we had put our differences behind us. , but that turned out not to be the case. As I sit here in this dingy bar drinking a warm beer, my thoughts drift back to that day six months ago when my fortunes changed for the worse.

 

 

For those who may not know me, my name is David Mack. I book NYCW once a month and up until six months ago, I had been booking and wrestling for CGC for a year and a half. ( OOC.: See NYCW: Old School Revisted and the David Mack Chronicles: The CGC Era for more detail if interested )

 

 

Things had been going well. NYCW , with only one show a month, didn’t take up much time, and we were slowly but steadily carving out a growing niche in the Tri-State area, despite what was considered an old school product, and Stomper’s tight fisted purse strings. CGC had been steadily climbing in competition with their rivals NOTBPW and , although not overtaking them, we had narrowed the gap and become a very prominent promotion with some of the most talked about storylines in North American wrestling.

 

 

But then things changed literally overnight. The man who had brought me in to CGC, George DeColt, decided to step down and turn the reins of the company over to his son , Alex. The man I replaced as head booker. I knew Alex had been bitter about that when it happened, but I had thought we had gotten past that and I had proven myself as a valuable asset with a solid track record of success. Apparently I was wrong.

 

 

It was the very next show after George stepped down that it happened. Despite Alex staring me in the eyes and telling me he wanted to work together , he decided to overturn my decisions for the television main event during the match.

 

 

After the show was over, I stormed into Alex’s office and told him that we had agreed I was going to handle all the booking decisions. I said I put in certain finishes for a reason and that I didn’t appreciate him changing them on a whim, even if he was the owner! I then stated either he agreed to never do it again, or he could find himself a new head booker!! I was stunned when he replied “There’s the door David. This is my company and if you can’t handle doing things my way, I don’t need you. You’re fired.”

 

 

It was then I realized that the son of a bitch had planned it. Less than two seconds later, two building security guards are there escorting me to my locker to grab my stuff and usher me out. They had already been waiting outside. Alex knew I wouldn’t stand for him horsing around with the main event matches and basically goaded me into that confrontation so he would have a reason to get rid of me.

 

 

For weeks it left a bitter taste in my mouth. I still had NYCW , but there we were struggling to bring in 2000 people a month, with profits measured in hundreds of dollars, when there were any. I had been booking 15, 000 seat PPV’s and dealing with more money in a month than NYCW had ever seen in its entire existence! All we could do was the one show a month and even wrestling on it, I still had a lot of time on my hands.

 

 

I realized what I wanted was payback. I wanted to show up Alex, to prove that he made a mistake in getting rid of me, but the real problem was how to do that. CGC was hardly likely to suddenly collapse. I had built too well, and Alex was competent enough to manage what was there, if nothing else. And my other oprions were limited. NOTBPW were more than happy to bring me in as a wrestler, but booking was strictly a family affair. 4C basically said they couldn’t afford to piss off Alex because he could strip their company dry if he really chose to , so Canada was out.

 

 

Eisen in SWF still hadn’t forgiven me for snagging Remo Richardson and driving another nail in the cofffin of their fall from dominance, and TCW had a working agreement with CGC , which Tommy Cornell wasn’t about to jeopardize for me. MAW, RIPW, PSW were out as I would be competing against myself since we all shared the same relative market area. Overseas was out as I still had my commitments to Stomper and NYCW. That left CZCW. Unfortunately, Cliff Anderson was more than happy chugging along in mediocrity and enjoyed calling all the shots himself, so he wasn’t interested in my services as a booker.

Which only left me with one option. And that is why I am here, freezing my ass off in this crappy bar in January 2010 , nursing a warm beer, while waiting for my prospective new boss to show up.

 

 

He had contacted me out of the blue and said he was starting a new wrestling company that was going to do something this area had never seen before and he wanted someone young and hungry, but with a proven track record to help him get it off the ground. Not having any other real options I agreed to come and discuss the details.

 

 

After about 20 minutes, he finally walked in. Most of the crowd would recognize him except for two things. 1. He was in a business suit and not a wrestling outfit, and 2. He wasn’t wearing a mask.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the bar I am in was located in Juarez , Mexico and the man who I was meeting was a well known Luchador named Championa Jr, a former 2 time OLLIE Universal Champion.

 

He came to the table, eagerly shook my hand and then excitedly sat down and unrolled a large bundle he had carried in. What he unfurled was a banner that said MHW Mexican Hardcore Wrestling. As he explained it to me it would take elements of the traditional Lucha Libre wrestling and mix them in with a anti-establishment , hardcore product similar to what DAVE offered. He said that Mexico had never had anything like it and that the market was ripe for making a big impact.

 

I could see the potential here. Granted there would be some serious obstacles to overcome, but I thrived on challenge, and the payoff could be huge. If I could succeed here I would prove once and for all my reputation as a successful booker and dispel any lingering doubt that Alex’s firing of me may have put into anyone’s mind. In fact, there were really only two problems that I could see right off. First, I really didn’t know much about lucha libre or hardcore, at least not from a booking perspective, so there would be a steep learning curve . Even more so since this was a company with no history, no reputation,, and currently, no roster. And second, I didn’t speak Spanish…..

 

 

 

 

Any comments, thoughts, feedback etc is welcome and appreciated.

[Marcel Fromage]

He came to the table, eagerly shook my hand and then excitedly sat down and unrolled a large bundle he had carried in. What he unfurled was a banner that said MHW Mexican Hardcore Wrestling. As he explained it to me it would take elements of the traditional Lucha Libre wrestling and mix them in with a anti-establishment , hardcore product similar to what DAVE offered. He said that Mexico had never had anything like it and that the market was ripe for making a big impact.

 

Although the Mexican region is probably the area of least interest in the C-verse to me personally, I'd definitely read this because of your diary track record. It would be something new, would give Mexico some much needed love around the diary parts and it would be really interesting to see where David Mack would fit into that really different environment. Given the discussion above about people being turned off by user characters, I have to say that your user character being pushed never seems out of place as you do such a good job of making it authentic.

 

As said in your CGC thread, it's good to see that you're still thinking about the game and the possibility of you starting up a diary in the future is definitely a good thing!

[G-Prime]

I didn't much like my formatting either, but it was after midnight, and I just kept typing and typing. Every show wouldn't look anything like that, I can't stand writing long match write-ups, even what I did there was hard. I just wanted to make it sound as good as possible.

 

And Kate Avatar won't be pushed, she'll just be backstage. I was thinking about starting up the 'Vixxens' Division, and not pushing her too much, I guess we'll have to see, but to start with, she'll exist for backstage segments only.

[UkWrestleFan]

Dave: the Revival is going to tough to write, to be honest. Maybe not to write so much as to have it sit "right" with your readers. With the re-opening the doors idea, rich new backer, etc, its going to feel like a lot of the start-up promotion diaries we have on here. And some of those are very very well done, so that's tough competition. You may also turn some people off by "stealing back" the major talent that left. Not saying that it can't work, just that it might be tough slugging, especially off the start.

 

This is also just opinion, but what might be easier to have readers buy into is something like Dave: Still Surviving. It would take some re-writing of the initial data, but basically the idea could be that DaVE almost went under in April of 2007 but managed to survive. They clawed through by releasing some of their biggers names, who end up at SWF and TCW, just like they did. But some stayed - just one or two of the "big" names. They would be complimented by the veteran core (mostly the guys now at PSW) and some cheap young guys. Maybe Vibert realizes he has to build a new generation of stars. Maybe Nemesis has brought in his son and is determined to make him a star. I think a story like that would be more appealing all-around. Plus, the backstory of just how the promotion survived a very lean summer and fall would make for some intriguing backstory, at least more intriguing than the standard "won a lottery" idea.

 

That's a much better idea. Is it believable that Eddie Peak, Chris Caulfield, Eric Tyler, Alex Braun and J D Morgan don't end up leaving? So James, Giedroyc and Laramee still go to SWF. Minnesota, Bach and The New Wave still head to TCW. PSW doesn't happen so DaVE keep Braun, Morgan and whoever else ended up in PSW.

 

And what about FCW? Would that have happened if DaVE hadn't have went under? If not, who would remain at DaVE?

 

And there's plenty of scope for creating new stars. Sayeed Ali would be a must sign, as would Larry Wood (for me, at least) Ash Campbell would be somebody who Nemesis would definitely bring in and try to mould into a star. Then I'd have Frankie Perez (I think his still style could work out in DaVE) and Remmy Skye (insane, hardcore ladder matches?)

 

The more I think about this idea, the more I like it.