SWF: Sunday Nights Counting Lights - The Continuing Saga of KP Avatar

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - Ah, the life of a not-so-single man. Turns out I'm meeting up with my girlfriend on Wednesday, not Thursday. So that means it's going to be another 24 hours or so before Supreme TV is up. I might make the BSS interview into a two-part thing, first part before Master of Puppets, second part after. But since I'd like to thank you all in advance for voting for The Flight to Disaster as April Monthly Spotlight, here's one backstage segment, taking off from where the Michaels-Eisen phone conversation left off, and back to KP's POV...

 

 

"A New Kid from Nowhere, Canada"

 

 

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Plum Park

7:31 p.m.

 

 

The creative meeting was briefly interrupted by yet another screaming match between Pete and Mr. Eisen. But now that he was off the phone and back to the matters at hand, he had regained his focus as quickly as he lost it. As for me, I was just glad that this was an Eisen-less creative meeting, with Eric and Jerry on "strike" and Brandon James joining them by refusing to report.

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/PeterMichaels.jpg

 

 

"Drugs are still a problem," muttered Peter, changing the topic. "I'm absolutely sure DuBois is still using, and that Campbell boy...pity about that kid, he's taken after his dad in so many ways. Unfortunately, they aren't the right ways." Peter was referring to none other than Ash, who was fined 25 percent of his paycheck for a positive drug test. Marijuana, without a shadow of a doubt. I knew he was in trouble before the meeting even started, because he kept bugging me about buying his bass guitar and complaining about the talk he had with Peter, where he listened intently before walking out, a bit upset obviously about having gotten caught.

 

"Maybe you should toughen the policies?", suggested Christian Faith. "The only way these kids would learn is if you go zero tolerance."

 

"Yes, Christian, I can respect that, but...oh, I dunno, at least things aren't as f---ed up as they were in the '90s. Oh, and speaking of the '90s, Rory McCallum is retiring. As an active wrestler, that is. Guess we better re-sign him while he's still stoked about his retirement decision. He's penciled in for High Stakes as the kayfabe head trainer, but has yet to make an appearance because his contract doesn't call for B-shows."

 

"I say five years written," offered Tom Gilmore, Rory's fellow Canadian. "He'd make a good replacement for Barry should he get removed from his Commissioner post in storyline."

 

"Suggestion noted, Tom. I'm actually thinking about who to get for Season 2 of High Stakes. Got emails from The Architect and Ernest Youngman, telling me that they're dying to get called up to the main roster. Ernest, I'm not surprised, since we've had him for a few months, but The Architect?"

 

"I think he's heard the rumors about...you know doing it with...BUY MY NONEXISTENT MERCHANDISE!!!!" Once again, Robbie Retro was keeping the creative meeting alive with his wisecracks. Sad to say, that was his primary value these days, as a guy who provided good suggestions in creative meetings while making all of us laugh.

 

"I would rather not comment on rumor and speculation," continued Peter. "Now here's the thing about our Season 2 lineup. It's too heel-heavy. Should we have all of 'em go through the 13-week season as heels, debut as a heel stable led by whomever, or should we balance things out between faces and heels?" Peter then turned to me as he sought my recommendation on this Canadian wrestler he was thinking of hiring. "KP, yours was the deciding vote, so I hope you made a good call here."

 

"He can work babyface and heel with equal ease," said Peter. "He's young, but not that young, and he's a brilliant technical worker. If he's a heel, he could form a stable with Bart, Brett and Kosher, but if he's a face, he could either debut on the next High Stakes or team up with somebody, perhaps KC Glenn, as an underdog team. Man, his holds are a thing of beauty. I just have a couple reservations."

 

"And those are?", asked Christian, who was wary about yet another addition to the SWF roster.

 

"One, he's a flake. A huge flake. Two, he's been known to pull some tasteless ribs while working indie shows. Three, he's a politician. Sort of like...you-know-who's kids." Peter paused for a few moments before remembering yet another catch. "Oh, right. Four, he needs work on his brawling skills."

 

"Nothing Dread at RIPW couldn't fix, I guess!", said Christian. "But yeah, perhaps we should have him on High Stakes as a face, because I see Architect, Ekuma, Justin Sensitive and those other candidates as better heels than faces."

 

"He needs a LOT of work on his brawling skills. Or any other skills that don't involve submissions. I've heard a lot of great things about him, though."

 

Was Peter going to hire another Klubb member or was he going to hire an average Joe who wouldn't cause much trouble? When Peter showed us his videos the week before, I liked what he put on the table. In fact, a lot of the creative team members liked him. But the stories about his attitude made me wish I didn't give him the thumbs-up. Hell, what do I know? I'm just a college boy fresh out of school who's doing jobs in the SWF because that's what my brother wanted to do as he climbed the ladder. At the end of the day, it's going to be Mr. Eisen's and Peter's decision.

[Big Roguey]

Is this who I think it is?

[therapidpro]

Jefferson Stardust vs Vengeance

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Marc DuBois

Chris Morrisette vs Des Davids

High Concept vs The Eisen Entourage vs The Cali Dragons vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

Jungle Lord vs The Zim

Jack Bruce vs Squeeky McClean © - non-title match

Nicky Champion vs Rich Money © - non-title match

[3rdStringPG]

Is this who I think it is?

 

My lips are sealed.

 

Anyway, it's been a madhouse here in the Philippines...massive blackout yesterday in most of the country, and no Internet access from home since last night. As such, I'm doing my work at a public computer shop, and if I work on the show tonight, I might end up spending a fortune. (Yes, I know it's ironic - paying money in order to continue earning money. But I have no choice.) I'll try to post Supreme TV in a bit, but if I don't, blame (rumored) pre-election political strife (and the subsequent snafu that followed) for the lack of updates.

 

EDIT - Ah, forget it. It usually takes me 3-4 hours to write a show (at the very least), so I'm winging it, going home and hoping against hope that the Internet's back down south of Manila.

[Eidenhoek]

Just got one more post to read and I'm caught up, but it's past midnight over here.

 

Richard...

 

Shoot, he's a weird guy, y'know? And I don't mean [just] your portrayal; it's clear the guy has a ridiculous mind for the business, or he wouldn't have been able to roflstomp his way to Cult in the territory days. And surely he has to understand the business somewhat to hit [inter]National.

 

Eric nepotism is find, as it's relatively minor (yes, world championships are still minor. Sorta). Angry Gilmore not a champion? Again, it's one misused worker, there to, I feel, flesh out an amusing part of the database.

 

But god do I have to believe he's not an idiot who believes stupid things. I hope, anyway.In my case, of course, that's that Dirty Tricks are a good idea. For you, it's his insane loyalty to the Klubb.

 

~~

 

Also, James is actually a very good brawler, assuming that the jump from '10 to '13 has kept stats relatively the same; his brawling skill is actually a hell of a lot higher, comparitively, than I thought it was.

 

Also also, you should move Tegan to the main roster, then make him injured and exhausted and such until he retires. FUFUFUFU KILL THE IRS.

[Psycho Sam]

No. I liked the IRS #TeamPuwowesu

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - Finally...the Third String Point Guard has come back to the GDS forums! Internet's working again and as it turns out, it was a modem problem as well. So here it is...after a long, long delay...Week 2 June Supreme TV.

 

SWF Supreme TV

Tuesday, June 11, 2013 (Week 2)

Plum Park (Tri State)

 

 

DARK MATCH/PRE-SHOW ANGLE:

 

 

The Allied Forces d. The Parts Unknown via Crashing On in 3:31 - 59/D+

The Can't Miss Prospects Beat Down on The Allied Forces - 67/C+

 

 

SUPREME TV:

 

 

Jefferson Stardust (w/Dawn the Cheerleader and Huey Cannonball) vs Vengeance (w/Ms. Emma Chase) (72/B-)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/JeffersonStardust.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/SkullDeBones_alt.jpg

 

 

- The go-home show starts with the announcers reminding everyone of what will be taking place at Master of Puppets, including the finally-confirmed tag title match between The Allied Forces and The Can't Miss Prospects under hardcore rules. Peter Michaels also hypes two great matches for tonight - Jack Bruce vs Squeeky McClean and Rich Money vs Nicky Champion in two non-title matches. Meanwhile, Vengeance is in full take-no-prisoners mode as he immediately dominates Jefferson Stardust in this no-bearing warm-up for his Steel Cage Match against Christian Faith at MoP.

- Dawn and Ms. Chase exchange dagger looks from outside as Stardust mounts a brief run of offense. Vengeance ducks an enzuigiri attempt from Stardust and regains control of the match at 2:00, with Stardust selling the missed move expertly.

- We don't see much from Stardust as Vengeance ends this match at close to four minutes, Skull Krush-ing his hapless Awesomeness opponent.

 

WINNER - Vengeance in 3:45

 

Vengeance Rants About Faith (81/B)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/SkullDeBones_alt.jpg

 

 

Vengeance is handed a microphone by Ms. Chase and begins yet another rant against his bitter enemy Christian Faith, a few days ahead of their scheduled cage match.

 

 

Vengeance - The time of judgment is nigh, Christian Faith. At Master of Puppets, you shall be reintroduced to Caged Hell, four stark, unforgiving walls of steel, and unlike our previous encounters in the cage, there will be no escape. Your only recourse, SINNER, shall be to beat me by any means necessary...by what the rulemakers of the SWF call pinfall or submission. You might as well face it...your PRIDE shall get the better of you as you continue to insist that age will not be a factor. And yes, Christian, you may have ran in to save Nicky Champion from those harbingers of doom, those three mystery men who continue to confound and perturb him, but that doesn't make you any less ENVIOUS of him. I still think you're behind this, Christian. But on Saturday, whatever issues you have with Champion shall be irrelevant. For at Master of Puppets, in our Steel Cage Match, you shall learn your final lesson in the SWF because, you know what? The Father of Sin is not above teaching old dogs like you new tricks. Vengeance...WILL BE OURS!!!

 

 

ANGLE - Bruce Gets Ready (81/B)

 

 

Jack Bruce is shown lacing up his boots and posing in front of a mirror, making a windmill gesture with his right arm as if about to play an air guitar. A loud, piercing "YEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!" means he's ready to rock...and cut another promo with his Men Unda Pressure.

 

 

ANGLE - Men Unda Pressure and The Almighty Dollar Argue (87/B+)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/JackBruce_zps8d6ec515.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/AngryGilmore.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/LobsterWarrior_alt.jpg

 

 

The Men Unda Pressure - Jack Bruce, Tom Gilmore and Chris Morrisette - now hit the ring with their new collective entrance music - "Won't Get Fooled Again" by the Who. So that explains why Bruce was screaming at the top of his lungs while getting ready for the promo...

 

Bruce - IT'S SHOW-TAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHM!!!!!!! (pauses as the crowd gives the Men Unda Pressure a huge cheer) Is everybody at Plum Park havin' a good time tonight!!!! (pauses) Everyone okay and ready to rock 'n' roll all night and party ever-y day with yours truly, the Cream of the Crop who has risen, AND will rise to the top at Supreme Challenge Triple X Triple I? (pauses) I thought so. But you are all gonna have to wait a little longer before I rev up my Beemer and pull a Sammy Hagar on the cops - and we all know he can't drive 55 - and join all you Constituents of Newark over at the Plum Ridge after the show! We've got a whole lot of wrestling for you tonight, including yours truly up against that sneaky bastard Squeeky McClean, but speaking of Squeeky, there's also gonna be a whole lot of cheating to go with that whole lot of wrestling. And you wanna know why? I'll have my man Tommy Tutone Gilmore explain...

 

Gilmore (softly, yet intensely) - Jack, I am not in the mood for your '80s rock references...

 

Bruce - Relax, Tom, I was just tryin' to get my Constituents all pumped up and READY TO RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWK!!!!!!!!

 

Gilmore - CAN THE THEATRICS, JACK, BECAUSE THIS IS NO TIME TO BE COMPLACENT!!! (pauses, and starts speaking softly again) That whole lot of cheating happened last week on Supreme TV, where I saw with my own two eyes, two officials arguing about what's right and what's wrong. Eventually, "what's wrong" prevailed over what was right, because instead of standing up for himself and doing the SWF Galaxy a favor...JEZ MCARTHUER TURNED AROUND AND GAVE THE ALMIGHTY DOLLAR ANOTHER CHEAP AND DIRTY WIN WITH THE HELP OF THEIR NEW RECRUITS!!! It's pretty obvious now, Rich...you're paying the referees...you've bought Squeeky McClean from Eric Eisen's Entourage and The Can't Miss Prospects from Chase SinCorporated...you may have a lot of money, Rich, but the Men Unda Pressure...ARE NOT FOR SALE!!!

 

Bruce - This is one three-man group you can't disband, Rich Money, because we're not just about rock 'n' roll. We've got INTEGRITY, Rich, and that's one thing that I believe is not in your vocabulary. Perhaps you'd want to take a little English remedial from Brandon James, huh? But maybe not...you got what you want from Ms. Chase...a little money here, a little hanky-panky there, and a lot of hidin' the Moneyman's salami where the CEO wants it to be hidden. (pauses as the crowd cheers Bruce's crude depiction of the shady deal) Of course, Brandon didn't mind losin' The Can't Miss Prospects. You don't hear Vengeance booming about the loss of his prize tag team specialists. Because at the end of the day...they got paid. Listen here, Rich...you can pay me all you want...you can make me bigger than Elvis and the Beatles and One Bleepin' Direction put together...but before you do that...I am gonna take you out. And let's not forget your big Russian goon, as I drive your once-a-month special to the hospital...in a rock 'n' roll ambulance. And next month, at Supreme Challenge Triple X Triple I, shall absolutely, positively, certainly take out your Alpha Puppy Remo... (pauses for effect) IN A NEW!!!! YORK!!!! MINUTE!!!!

 

Gilmore - SATURDAY, RICH MONEY!!!! Last Man Standing on Master of Puppets for the Supreme Heavyweight title. I can almost taste it, Moneyman, because Saturday is gonna be the day when I put the Fear of Gilmore in you.

 

The mention of Gilmore's new catchphrase is enough to bring Rich Money and Remo out, though their new Almighty Dollar recruits are probably somewhere backstage...

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/RichMoney_alt1.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/Remo.jpg

 

 

Money - Did I just hear the sound of crickets chirping following yet another hot air sermon from the homeless man's answer to Axl Rose, the fat and washed-up is-that-Guns-'n'-Roses era? That's right, Jack, I know a thing or two about that thing you call music, and that most recent single of yours...is not music. You took a song that nobody has heard of or would care to hear and turned it into something much longer...and much worse. And now you have the audacity to come out here with your bald friend and your cartoon hero who doesn't say much anymore...and tell me none of you Ladies Unda Pressure are for sale?

 

Gilmore - That's real clever, Rich...REAL CLEVER...can't you think of any better lines?

 

Money - Even if I couldn't, I wouldn't need to. You know why? Because I'm Money.

 

Remo - There's another belt comin' in the next few months...and once Mr. Bowen starts choosing contenders, we'll have one ready...perhaps your crustacean chum might be interested?

 

Morrisette (finally speaking) - Not a chance, Remo...haven't you two done enough already? Stripping me of my mask, which was actually a blessing in disguise...beating us numerous times by paying off the referees...nearly taking me out of commission as I hoped to qualify for the Elimination Chamber...you two seem content to coast along by spending money and pushing people around, but next time you try that, you might not be that lucky.

 

Remo - What are you talkin' about, lobster boy...you're gettin' up on age and like your friend Jack, you don't wanna admit it. You need that gold more than you think you do, and since you obviously can't beat us...you might be better served by joinin' us...

 

Money - And we're growing from strength to strength, mind you. The Almighty Dollar now boasts of the World Heavyweight and Supreme Heavyweight champions, and you're looking at 'em. And we've now got the North American champ in Squeeky McClean, who proved to me that he's still got it...and therefore, is still Money. We've got the Tag Team champs, The Can't Miss Prospects, who have just granted that odd couple Valiant and Giedroyc their title shot. Only one title remaining for now, and that's Shooting Star. I may not have found anyone on Uprising, but damned if I won't at Master of Puppets...before I show this bald dude that while he may put the fear of Gilmore in me, I'm still richer, stronger, better-looking...and better in the ring. Now that's something even the most jaded SWF Galaxy MARK will have to admit.

 

 

ANGLE - Gilmore Booked Against DuBois, Morrisette Booked Against Davids (71/C+)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/RunawayTrain_alt_zps056edac4.jpg

 

 

As usual, before things can get more heated than they already are, Barry Bowen emerges from Aegalaeus Position to break up the argument and book some matches. And despite his attempts to act like a "justice and equality" type of Commissioner, the SWF Galaxy isn't buying it, as the fans shower him with boos.

 

Bowen - HEY!!!! (pauses) You people never learn, do you? Week after week I see the same old thing. Almighty Dollar speaks, Men Unda Pressure interrupt. Men Unda Pressure boast, Almighty Dollar humbles them with words.

 

Bruce - Can somebody say SELECTIVE MEMORY?!?!?

 

Morrisette - No, Jack, I think revisionism is the word...

 

Bowen - HEY!!!! You better learn to treat me with RESPECT, Jack, or I just might bankrupt you with fines and suspensions faster than a New York Minute! (pauses) And that goes for you too, Lobster. Now here's the deal. Since we've already got Bruce vs McClean and Money vs Champion tonight...how about this? Remo, you're the World Heavyweight champ, you take the night off.

 

Remo - Thank you, Mr. Bowen.

 

Bowen - You're welcome, Remo. (to the Men Unda Pressure) See, boys? Even champions know that a little respect to authorities can go a long, long way. Now, for the matches. Tom, I want you in the ring tonight with Marc DuBois of The Can't Miss Prospects.

 

Gilmore - Merci, MONSIEUR Bowen...

 

Bowen (sarcastically) - Charming, charming. As for you, Chris, your opponent for tonight shall be Dazzling Des Davids, the other half of the Prospects. Marc and Des get a nice tune-up for their hardcore tag title match, while you two stay busy instead of stepping out every week or every other week and denying the SWF Galaxy of quality sports entertainment. Any questions? (pauses) I knew it. Now you boys behave yourself and learn to settle your differences properly.

 

 

Tom "Angry" Gilmore (w/Jessie) vs Marc DuBois (w/Rich Money and Des Davids) (66/C)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/AngryGilmore.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/MarcDuBois.jpg

 

 

- The presence of Rich Money in DuBois' corner means only one thing - The Can't Miss Prospects are now, without a shadow of a doubt, property of Rich Money and The Almighty Dollar. Des Davids is also with DuBois as he starts off slow, falling victim to a quick legsweep from Gilmore.

- Money seems confident of an upset win for DuBois here, as Ric Young is the referee. As such, DuBois doesn't hesitate to take the action to The Almighty Dollar's corner, where Davids and Money are able to get some cheap shots in from outside. Davids and Money are surprised when Young warns them about interefering.

- DuBois get some offense in at 4-6 minutes, thanks to a distraction from Davids. After scoring on a DDT, DuBois goes for the pin...ONE...TWO...KICKOUT! DuBois argues about a slow count, while Jessie climbs the ring apron to complain about The Almighty Dollar's insistence on interfering. Her pleas fall on deaf ears, unfortunately.

- Gilmore cleverly breaks free from DuBois' attempt to set up the Model Solution, and when he does, that's all he needs to give the original Can't Miss Prospect a dose of Anger Management. ONE...TWO...THREE! Gilmore wins, and Money can't believe Ric Young decided to call things fairly...at least for the most part.

 

WINNER - Gilmore in 8:27

 

 

ANGLE - Faith and Frehley Rant About Vengeance and James (80/B)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/ChristianFaith.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/SteveFrehley.jpg

 

 

At the catering area, Christian Faith and Steve Frehley, both of whom are resting for Master of Puppets (a fact the announcers remind us about), are backstage, dressed in street clothes and discussing Vengeance's earlier promo.

 

Frehley - Man, that Vengeance sure is somethin', goin' out there and accusin' you of leading the attacks on Champion.

 

Faith - If talk is cheap, Steve, then no man is cheaper than the Father of Sin. His words do not faze me, but we shall have to keep focused for our respective matches at Master of Puppets. For me, I'm fighting for pride. And you...you're fighting AGAINST Pride and hopefully getting a shot at World Heavyweight at Supreme Challenge...versus Bruce and whoever's champion at that time...

 

Frehley - S---, I can't wait to get my hands on that big businessman Brandon James and take it to the STREETS!!! (cracks his knuckles excitedly) Just like one of those East L.A. eses tryin' to mess with little Stevie Frehley back in the day...he goin' down, Christian...boom, boom, boom, one Comet for all the Frehley-natics, and not to mention your Faithful...

 

Faith (sounding unimpressed) - Steve, no offense, but you should not underestimate Brandon James.

 

Frehley - What?

 

Faith - James is bigger, he may be stronger, and Steve, another thing...you might want to tone down the bravado lest you get too overconfident and fall to Big Money.

 

Frehley - After all these years, Christian, you still doubt me? (pounds his fist on a table) What the f--- is WRONG with you, Christian? Lemme tell you this, Supreme Legend. Who's beaten Vengeance, you or me? Me. Who's beaten Brandon James easily, you or me? Me. I love you, man, but you've got to have Faith! Faith in ME! I've always had your back! I mean, y'all better and all that, but you gotta admit I've had more success this year against those two SinCorporated mofos. James and Vengeance ain't s---.

 

Faith - Faith may be good, but too much faith in oneself could lead to his downfall. Be careful, Steve. (walks away and pats Frehley on the back)

 

Frehley (to no one particular, under his breath) - Treatin' me like a little kid...

 

 

ANGLE - Newton Vignette (21/E)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/DavisWayneNewtonalt_zpsd070788a.jpg

 

 

As the SWF continues to promote its new High Stakes program, we see another vignette from one of the first season's eight contestants - Dave "Triple Threat" Newton from Toronto, Ontario.

 

Newton - I'm Davis Wayne Newton, or Dave for short, and you can call me the Triple Threat, YOUR first SWF High Stakes winner and YOUR next breakout SWF Superstar. And I've got Rich Money as my mentor - there isn't anyone better out there to guide the career of a young wrestler comin' up in the business. I come from Toronto, hometown of Angry Gilmore. Growin' up poor in Toronto was always a hassle...until I discovered I love two things. Sports and hurtin' people...but not without a reason, of course. After graduating high school, I was drafted as a defenseman by the Mighty Ducks of Anaheim, right before they became the Ducks. I turned 'em down 'cuz I wanted to do what no Newton had done in the past...graduate college. Hockey was fun, and I still play...but back in the day, they called me Mr. Penalty Box. Played strong safety for Washington State in college, and I got drafted by both the NFL and CFL. Bottom-round guy, but at least I got drafted. But I believe my best sport was, and still is, wrestling. (pauses as we see photos of Newton's amateur wrestling medals) Gold medalist in three weight classes, but not once did I get penalized for bein' too rough or breaking the rules. See, I like hurtin' people...but not without a reason. That's the Dave Newton way. And that's why you want to see me in the SWF someday.

 

 

Chris Morrisette (w/Tom "Angry" Gilmore) vs Des Davids (w/Marc DuBois) (73/B-)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/LobsterWarrior_alt.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/DesDavids.jpg

 

 

- After Angry put the "Fear of Gilmore" in Marc DuBois, will Chris Morrisette be able to teach the apparently "Dazzling" Des Davids a thing or two about hard work? It doesn't seem likely at first, as Davids starts out strong with several stiff blows and a running elbow that floors the Working Class Hero.

- Davids continues his strong performance with a swinging neckbreaker, and goes for an early cover. ONE...TWO...KICKOUT!

- At the announce table, Rich Money (temporarily replacing Jason Azaria for this match) and Duane Fry talk about how Darren Smith won't be foolish enough to be "blinder than Ray Charles" just like Ric Young was, but for the meantime, we don't see any outside interference from DuBois. And at 4:10, Morrisette shows signs of coming back after countering a Touch Down attempt from Davids!

- The action is open from 4:30 to 6:30, as Morrisette uncharacteristically fights back with some power moves and the Steel Curtain Trap to set up the C-Mo Clutch. He's got Davids very close to tapping out, when DuBois hits the ring and interferes! That prompts Angry Gilmore to jump in, Rich Money to leave the announce table, and Darren Smith to call this a double-DQ.

 

WINNER - Nobody. Double DQ at 6:44.

 

 

ANGLE - "Mister Benson" Impersonates Bowen (73/B-)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/ElmoBenson_zps0dcd5164.jpg

 

 

The next match is a four-way tag team elimination match to determine the tag team title challengers at Supreme Challenge XXXIII. And with the 24/7 Partay Dudez, Cali Dragons and Eisen Entourage (Franklin Huggins and Dozer Smith) in the ring, we have one team remaining...and it's High Concept! Elmo Benson has his hair tied up, and he's wearing a fake goatee, a suit and a pair of shades. High Concept's temporary ring music - "The Locomotion" by Grand Funk Railroad - means this is going to be a Barry Bowen impersonation. Greg Black and Haley Buck, however, are dressed as themselves and in no mood to impersonate anyone.

 

"Mister Benson" - HEY!!!! Now there's a reason why I enter the ring to the cheesiest song recorded by one of the most critically panned rock bands of all time. (pauses as the crowd cheers his Barry Bowen impersonation) HEY!!!! I'M THE COMMISSIONER, MAN! And that's the reason why I enter to "The Locomotion"...BECAUSE I'M THE COMMISSIONER, MAN! That's why I break up arguments and book matches on the fly...BECAUSE I'M THE COMMISSIONER, MAN! I stand for justice, equality and failure to get drafted by the NBA! You know why, because...

 

Black (playing the straight man) - Elmo, shut up already and let's get this over with.

 

"Mister Benson" - It's MISTER Benson. AND I'M THE COMMISSIONER, MAN!!!

 

 

High Concept (w/Haley Buck) vs The Eisen Entourage vs The Cali Dragons vs 24/7 Partay Dudez (w/Kristen Pearce and A-Prime) - Number One Contender match for SWF World Tag Team Titles (58/D+)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/ElmoBenson_zps0dcd5164.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/GregBlack_zps4ea5506c.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/FreddyHuggins_zpsdafa29d9.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/BulldozerBrandon_alt6_zps0941735d.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/FrankiePerez.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/MikeyJames.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/MainstreamHernandez_zps6c9b99e4.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/StevenParker_zps66188f51.jpg

 

 

- Duane Fry immediately slags the match as the four teams prepare to clash for a right to compete in Supreme Challenge XXXIII for the tag team titles - "What are these bush leaguers doing on Supreme TV?", Fry complains.

- Still, that doesn't mean the match is short of exciting moments, as High Concept shows their tag team brilliance, even with "Mister Benson" wearing a shirt, tie, slacks and leather shoes.

- High Concept gets revenge on the 24/7 Partay Dudez as Benson and Greg Black combine for a Game Over on Stevie. Jez McArthuer counts ONE...TWO...but stops counting when bouncer A-Prime tries to break up the cover! That forces McArthuer to disqualify the Canadian boy band at 2:38, leaving three teams remaining in the ring.

- In a case of "strange alliances" between face tag teams, The Cali Dragons and High Concept work together in trying to get the better of the heel Eisen Entourage. But the alliance ends when Mikey James nails Greg Black with a Scything Side Kick and counters a Huggins Kiss attempt from FD3. Having broken free, James attacks Huggins with aforementioned superkick variation and goes for the cover. ONE...interference from Dozer with McArthuer's back turned!

- The new Eisen Entourage makes the second elimination, as "Bulldozer" Bryan Smith and Franklin D. Huggins III eliminate Mikey James with a Fight for Your Right to Party (bearhug/lariat combination) that leads to a three-count. The fast-rising Cali Dragons are out of there at 6:40!

- We get an even exchange of offense between High Concept and the Entourage before the Entourage, minus their leader Eric Eisen, once again cheats their way into a win. As McArthuer warns Black about interfering, Dozer illegally enters the ring to nail "Mister Benson", the Barry Bowen impersonator, with an Inverted Piledriver! McArthuer returns to the action in time to see Huggins cover Benson. ONE...TWO...THREE! The Eisen Entourage is going to Supreme Challenge XXXIII to face either The Can't Miss Prospects or The Allied Forces!

 

WINNERS - The Eisen Entourage in 9:54. Order of elimination - 24/7 Partay Dudez, Cali Dragons, High Concept

 

 

ANGLE - Huggins Rants About McClean (66/C+)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/FreddyHuggins_zpsdafa29d9.jpg

 

 

Having picked up the win, Franklin D. Huggins III asks for a mic and requests that the Entourage's ring music be paused for a few moments...

 

Huggins - Cut the music, soundman! Cut the music! (pauses) Hmmmm...I've never been good with words, but I've got four words for you, Squeeky...WE NEVER LIKED YOU. We only put up with you because you kissed our frat buddy's ass so good all these past months, your lips have got sores on 'em. No wonder none of those college girls we meet and greet with after the show don't want any part of you. They couldn't care less if you don't drink, smoke or do drugs...but lemme just say this. Nobody loves an apple polisher. I don't care if you just stole North American off Eric...we're glad you're gone and now that you are, we'll be comin' after your new friends Des and Marc reeeeeal soon. That is, if The Can't Miss Rejects...as in Chase SinCorporated rejects...keep the titles against the exciting, dynamic, and va-va-voom Hannah and her boys who can't draw flies if their last names were Sierra Hotel India Tango, The Allied Corpses. (to Dozer) PARTY ON, DOZER!!! WOO-HOOOOOOO!!!!

 

Having said that, Huggins and Dozer bang their heads to their ring music ("Party Hard" by Andrew W.K.) and open a couple beers for themselves. The crowd doesn't know what to make out of this - some are cheering, others are booing, while a smaller group is heckling Huggins by chanting the name of his twin sister - "WE WANT LAURA! (CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP)"

 

 

ANGLE - Champion Rants About Money (81/B)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/NickyChampion_alt.jpg

 

 

After the break, we see Nicky Champion in the ring as he once again addresses those mystery attacks...which he now believes were masterminded by Rich Money.

 

Champion - That Rich Money, he sure made like a pot out there, didn't he? You know, calling the kettle black? For while he may have been right in calling Jack Bruce's shpiel a bunch of hot air, he himself was stinkin' up Plum Park with the odor of his breath...that hot, putrid air comin' outta his mouth. But the SWF Galaxy knows they aren't gonna get any hot air outta Nicky Champion. For Nicky Champion says what's on his mind. It may not always be right, it may not always be pretty, but Nicky Champion sees no need to call himself "money" or fancy himself a Father of Sin or bring rock 'n' roll decadence to large arenas across America! And since Nicky Champion isn't always right, he would like to take this moment to once again apologize to Christian Faith. I was wrong to accuse you, Christian. But damned if I wasn't human apart from being more than just a name!

 

Now on to you, Rich Money. The process of elimination has led Nicky Champion to YOU, and there isn't anybody else in the locker room as devious as you are when it comes to spending money on new acquisitions and makin' them do your bidding. Okay, so it probably wasn't you, Remo and Squeeky when I beat the Sneaky One and got my headdress back. Squeeky, after all, was a square peg in a round hole in those days, suffering with yet another joke of a faction, The Eisen Entourage. Well, who was it, then? Who was the third man? Easy. Nicky Champion DOESN'T KNOW AND DOESN'T CARE TO KNOW!!! And lemme tell you something else, Rich. Your silence, your refusal to acknowledge our match tonight, non-title as it may be, it only means one thing. YOU DID IT. You sicced your goons on Nicky Champion, and I don't care if you've got ten, twenty, thirty, hell, even the whole locker room in your employ. None of those attacks have slowed down Nicky Champion, so you better be ready when Nicky Champion slows YOU down ahead of your title defense at Master of Puppets. And tell your boy Remo that I'm ready for Saturday.

 

Now you may be right. That old fossil from Miami by way of New York and Hollywood may be too cheap to afford ladders. But Nicky Champion has WATCHED many an SWF Ladder Match on television, and Nicky Champion knows what to expect. In fact, Nicky Champion knows what to expect from you and Remo. And that is YOU, Rich Money, with your shoulders on the mat as your crooked referees have no choice but to count one, two, three and raise the Hawkeye's hand in victory. Not to mention Remo, the Alpha Dog, with his fingers a few inches...no, SEVERAL FEET short of grabbing World Heavyweight gold at Master of Puppets. When that's over, you two will never forget that money isn't everything...that hot air leads to a loss of focus...and most of all, you will never forget that NICKY CHAMPION IS MORE THAN JUST A NAME!!!

 

 

Jungle Lord vs The Zim (w/Ms. Emma Chase) (65/C)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/JungleJack.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/ZimmyBumfhole_alt.jpg

 

 

- This one's going to be quick...real quick. Jungle Lord still looks demoralized despite last week's win over The Eisen Entourage, and he's looking and acting lost out there, mailing it in, going through the motions. You get the idea.

- The Zim ends this match in little more than two minutes, knocking the not-so-wild man out with a Zim in One. He celebrates his win with Ms. Chase, who looks on with an icy glare as The Zim yells "BOO-YEAAAAAHHHH!!!!" and makes those thrusting gestures.

 

WINNER - The Zim in 2:19

 

 

ANGLE - Randy B. Beats Down on The Zim (65/C)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/RandyBumfholealt.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/ZimmyBumfhole_alt.jpg

 

 

As The Zim prepares to give Jungle Lord a post-match beatdown, his early attempts are interrupted by Randy Bumfhole, who's running in there to give his brother a beatdown of his own! Randy knocks The Zim out with a Bumfhole Buster before grabbing a mic and warning his brother ahead of their tables match at Master of Puppets...

 

R. Bumfhole - Saturday, Zimmy. I taught you everything there is to know, brother. So remember this. You may be older, but you sure as hell ain't better. I'll be seeing you on Saturday...broken-down Sex Machine...

 

 

ANGLE - Jameson Vignette (37/D-)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/KirkJameson_zps4c517e77.jpg

 

 

And we've got another High Stakes vignette as the crowd cools down following that display of, uh...brotherly love! Now we've got Kirk Jameson, hyping himself and his new mentor Chris Morrisette, while the usual childhood, teenage and indie wrestling photos are shown onscreen in this vignette.

 

Jameson - Last man to get a mentor, last man remaining when High Stakes' first season draws to a close. I'm Kirk Jameson from Boston, and like my mentor Chris Morrisette, I'm a blue collar guy all the way. No hard feelings, Calum, guess C-Mo wanted to work with someone with a similar work ethic! (pauses) I'm 27 years old, and back when I was growing up in Beantown, I ran with a tough group of kids. We weren't bullies, we weren't into the gang scene, but we had an unusual hobby - bare-knuckle fighting. I was, as far as that little group was concerned, Boston bare-knuckles champion in my teens. But I never forgot about school, and I'd just finished my sophomore year in college when the wrestling bug bit me. Started training in the art of submission wrestling, and if you want an example of an instant tap-out move, you've got to see the Kirk-Hold. Sounds cheesy, but yeah, it's my finisher, and countless individuals have tapped out of it. You'll be seeing more of me...and more of the Kirk-Hold on High Stakes. See you every Thursday night on USA Sports 1, SWF Galaxy!

 

 

Jack Bruce vs Squeeky McClean © (w/Rich Money and Remo) - non-title match (82/B)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/JackBruce_zps8d6ec515.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/SqueekyMcCleanalt.jpg

 

 

- Now a full-fledged Almighty Dollar member, Squeeky McClean looks cockier than ever as he's got the support of Rich Money and Remo as his cornermen. But he's clotheslined the moment he steps into the ring, as Bruce unloads on McClean with a flurry of punches and kicks as he tries to get up. Squeeky, as is his custom, begs for mercy, but the Cream of the Crop doesn't give him any. A double underhook suplex allows Bruce to go for the cover. Shane Stones counts ONE...TWO...KICKOUT!

- Bruce loses his momentum at around 3:00 after missing a shoulderblock and getting distracted by Rich Money from outside. Squeeky uses the distraction to go for a flash roll-up. Bruce kicks out at one and tries to reverse the roll-up...ONE...KICKOUT AGAIN!

- For the next 2-3 minutes, we see Squeeky trying to slow Bruce down with a series of rest holds, before going for a Stain Removal. ONE...TWO...Stones warns Squeeky about using the ropes!

- Stones continues trying his best to call things fairly at around 7:30, when, after a brief burst of offense from Bruce, McClean clotheslines his opponent over the top rope and into the waiting fists and boots of Remo and Rich Money. Remo and Money try to smash Bruce against the barricade, and they succeed, but Stones sees this and gives both men a very stern warning! Money warns Stones back and pulls out a wad of hundred-dollar bills...which Stones seems a bit interested in. With the referee distracted, this gives Bruce more than enough time to reenter the ring and beat the ten-count.

- McClean continues looking good at 10:00 as he has Bruce trapped in the Clean Out...a deadly submission maneuver that Bruce is somehow able to escape as he desperately grabs for the ropes!

- Squeeky looks frustrated at the 11:30 mark as he goes for another Stain Removal...but Bruce avoids getting set up and, with his last reserves of strength, takes McClean out in a NEW YORK MINUTE! Both men are now down and trying desperately to pin the other...and Bruce is somehow able to make the cover first. ONE...TWO...KICKOUT!

- From 12:00 to 15:00, Bruce has a slight edge over Squeeky, but isn't exactly dominating things as he's still recovering from those eight minutes getting knocked around by Squeeky...and The Almighty Dollar. But at 15:10, Bruce hits another New York Minute on McClean as Peter Michaels screams his usual "NEW YORK MINUTE!!! WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?!?!?" Stones counts ONE...TWO...DISTRACTION FROM MONEY!

- Stones and Money are arguing as Remo jumps into the ring and smashes Bruce with McClean's North American belt...much to Money's chagrin, Stones catches this and disqualifies McClean! The Cream of the Crop wins a tough "tune-up" match for his Master of Puppets Ambulance Match versus Marat Khoklov!

 

WINNER - Bruce in 15:54 via DQ

 

 

ANGLE - Money Gets Ready (77/B-)

 

Actually, it's more like "Money gets ready by storming into the locker room and rebuking the referees he had once paid off." Money continues scolding the referees about "wasting my money" as he changes into his ring gear in preparation for tonight's main event...

 

 

Nicky Champion vs Rich Money © - non-title match (96/A*)

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/NickyChampion_alt.jpg vs http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/RichMoney_alt1.jpg

 

 

- As both men lock up, the passion in this heated Plum Park crowd is reaching fever pitch, as the Hawkeye and the Moneyman exchange basic attacks to start things off. Money then calls for a few rest holds to start the action off slow and steady.

- Immediately, we see hints of new referee Sam Sparrow showing some heel bias, as he lets Money get away with choking Champion against the ropes. Champion tries to psyche himself back into the action by kicking and stomping as the crowd alternates cheers of "NIC-KY! NICK-KY! NICK-KY! NIC-KY!" and "MONEY SUCKS!" Champion uses his brawling attack to gain control, and by 4:00, Money's already begging off and asking the Hawkeye to stop...

- Champion wisely stays off the heavy artillery, pinning Money with a basic DDT at 5:30, followed up with an elbowdrop. ONE...KICKOUT! Did that count seem a little slow to you, even if it was just a one-count? Indeed it did.

- Sparrow's bias continues at 7:00, as the match begins to appear more even with several moves and counter-moves. After Champion kicks out at two following a basic sidewalk slam from Money, Duane Fry climbs the apron to complain about a slow count. Sparrow is clearly heard shouting "I'M COUNTING AS FAST AS I CAN!" by the TV audience. That distraction is good enough for Money to exit the ring, grab a chair and bash Champion with it. He climbs the top rope, goes for the Dollars from Heaven, and Sparrow counts. ONE..TWO..KICKOUT!

- Money's now fully in control for the next four minutes, armdragging Champion into an armbar, nailing him with high-impact moves, choking him against the ropes, bashing his head on the turnbuckle. Still, Champion keeps fighting back, keeps kicking out, keeps giving the Moneyman a hard time...

- After Champion kicks out of a Money facebreaker, he suddenly sits up, flexes his muscles, stomps his feet on the mat upon standing up, and finds his second wind at around 13:40! This is just how Sam Strong used to do it, and Champion, despite dissing his former boss in the earlier promo, doesn't mind using Strong's comeback in the SWF! Suddenly, he turns into a no-sell machine, and gets a huge pop when he Papoose Piledrivers Money onto the mat! Sparrow counts...ONE.....TWO.....EASY KICKOUT FOR MONEY! The crowd is irate, and so are Peter Michaels and Jason Azaria!

 

Michaels - Jason, you know this guy, don't you? Didn't he used to work with you in Hollywood?

 

Azaria - He sure did, and here's a little fact you may not know. Sam Sparrow was instrumental in helping my old boss remain champion longer than he should have!

 

Michaels - That explains it, Jason, but this is unconscionable. The new official, Sam Sparrow, he is letting Rich Money get away with murder!

 

Fry - Oh, come on, Peter, take a chill pill or something. Rich Money is doing the right thing, and so is the referee. In fact, this might be the best official the SWF has ever hired!

 

- As the announcers argue, Nicky Champion is doing his own share of arguing, going toe-to-toe with Sparrow and insisting that the count was too slow. This allows Money to try jumping Champion from behind, but Champion senses the sneak attack and snapmares Money! Sparrow continues arguing with Champion, but he shakes him off and nails a spinebuster on Money. ONE....TWO....KICKOUT! Champion is now furious, and is all ready to take out his anger on Sparrow!

- Before Champion can get his hands on Sparrow, he stops momentarily, but the stop allows Money to attack Champion with a cutter, then pin him following a Dollars from Heaven! ONE! TWO! THREE! FASTEST COUNT IN THE HISTORY OF SUPREME TV, YELLS PETER MICHAELS!!! Rich Money is joined in the ring by Remo, Squeeky McClean and The Can't Miss Prospects as The Almighty Dollar celebrates their leader's dirty, referee-aided win.

 

WINNER - Money in 16:38 via fast-counted pinfall

 

 

Post-Match Thoughts

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/PeterMichaels.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/DuaneFry_alt1_zps74306767.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/JasonAzaria_zpsdb70ab90.jpg

 

 

Michaels - This is sick. Another travesty of justice has been committed on Supreme TV! God knows what Rich Money has in mind for Master of Puppets.

 

Azaria - This official, Sam Sparrow, he better not be the referee when Remo and Money defend their titles against Nicky Champion and Tom Gilmore respectively. And there's Remo and Money, kicking Champion while he's down!

 

Michaels - WHY ISN'T SAM SPARROW DOING ANYTHING!!! Where are the officials?

 

Fry - Peter, take it easy, they're leaving the ring. They just wanted to send a message to Mr. I Speak in the Third Person over there!

 

Michaels - Well, thank Gawd...but I fear what Money's got in store for Master of Puppets. Will he get all the gold, just as he had promised, or will one of his new acquisitions, or hopefully Money, Remo or Marat Khoklov, fall short? Remember, the matches at Master of Puppets all follow Extreme Rules which is basically...little to no rules at all.

 

Fry - That is just biased announcing, Peter. Biased, biased announcing.

 

Azaria - On Thursday, we've got High Stakes on USA Sports 1, and on Saturday, we'll be seeing you, the SWF Galaxy, at Master of Puppets, so be sure to contact your local provider for more details! And speaking of details, do check these matches out. Steve Frehley vs Brandon James in a Falls Count Anywhere match to determine the third man in Supreme Challenge XXXIII's World Heavyweight title match. Christian Faith and Vengeance in a Steel Cage Match...will Faith's bad luck in big events continue, or will he finally emerge victorious against the Father of Sin?

 

Fry - And of course, we've got Marat Khoklov vs Jack Bruce in an Ambulance Match. Rich Money vs Tom Gilmore for Supreme Heavyweight, Last Man Standing. Remo vs Nicky Champion for Supreme Heavyweight in a Ladder Match. Ladder, Nicky. Nicky, ladder. They sure don't do that stuff over at Miami! Those three matches are gonna be REAL barnstormers.

 

Michaels - Catch those matches and MORE at SWF Master of Puppets, this Saturday, June 15 at Greenwalt Dome. For Duane Fry and Jason Azaria, this is Peter Michaels, saying goodnight, SWF Galaxy! Thanks for another awesome Supreme TV!

 

 

SWF Supreme TV Grade - 89/B+

Increased Popularity in 8 Regions

Supreme TV Rating - 14.40

[3rdStringPG]

Thirdy's Thoughts - Post-Shows OOC:

 

- Time for a little "midweek" update for the prediction game! To make the prize clearer, the June winner chooses a worker for July's shoot interview and provides three questions. Everyone else is limited to just one. And for now, we've got a new leader, but not by that much!

 

1. MichiganHewo - 19/21, 90% (+6/7, +1)

2. christmas_ape - 18/21, 86% (+5/7)

2. Oregano Jensen - 18/21, 86% (+4/7)

2. flaviooooo - 18/21, 86% (+4/7)

2. therapidpro - 6/7, 86%

6. Rickymex - 17/21, 81% (+4/7)

7. jhd1 - 11/14, 78%

8. Croquemitaine - 16/21, 76% (+5/7)

9. Psycho Sam - 15/21, 71% (+5/7, +1)

9. ohiodevil - 10/14, 71%

11. Bigjondalegend - 13/21, 62% (+3/7)

12. Midnightnick - 12/21, 57% (+4/7)

 

 

- I think it was the High Stakes vignettes that prevented me from getting my first-ever A card in TEW 2013. I use the "Promo - Singles (Generic)" angle for these vignettes, and those count in the show grades...

- Still, I'm pleasantly surprised by Champion vs Money scoring A*. Champion's psychology is still at B-, but I guess his youth and overness (B+/86) helped quite a lot.

- The Morrisette vs Davids draw threw everyone off, but I wanted to make The Can't Miss Prospects look a bit strong (emphasis on a bit) before the PPV. Didn't want to make Davids go over Morrisette just yet...

[3rdStringPG]

PRO WRESTLING HITS PRESENTS - STRAIGHT SHOOTERS

By Dennis Kletsky

 

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

 

 

RING RATS, 'ROIDS AND STIFF SHOTS - BIG SMACK SCOTT REVEALS ALL!!!

 

 

Scott "Big Smack Scott" Sinclair has been all over the pro wrestling dirt sheets, not to mention the pages of USA Today, The Huffington Post and Yahoo! Sports in recent weeks. That's because of his involvement in the so-called "Flight to Disaster", a 12-hour nightmare plane ride that allegedly featured the Smacker - and other wrestlers - misbehaving in every way imaginable. While workers such as Acid, Kurt Laramee, Eric and Jerry Eisen and Jason Azaria got off with slaps on the wrist, Big Smack Scott paid the ultimate price a wrestler could pay - he was fired by the SWF as this incident was the proverbial last straw following seven years of what included, but was not limited to steroid-related suspensions, arrests for drunken misbehavior and disorderly behavior in the locker room. Given his controversial - and unsavory - reputation, we thought it would have been a challenge to get a hold of him this soon after being sacked by Supreme.

 

But as my editor Dan Mardayl would often say, "fire a wrestler, you've got yourself an automatic shoot subject." And that was very true with the Smacker, who now works for Mitch Naess' Pittsburgh Steel Wrestling and had recently mounted an unsuccessful challenge to PSW Champion Madman Boone at PSW Hostility. Scott was willing to share more than a few minutes of his time as I dropped by his Pittsburgh apartment and had a few beers with pro wrestling's King of Controversy, Big Smack Scott himself.

 

DISCLAIMER - The views presented by Mr. Scott Sinclair do not represent the views of ProWrestlingHits.com.

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/BigSmackScottalt3_zps4b3a107a.jpg

 

 

Big Smack Scott - How do you do, Pro Wrestling Hits? Man, I've been waiting for this moment.

 

Pro Wrestling Hits - I'm sure you've got a lot to get off your chest following your firing from the Supreme Wrestling Federation.

 

BSS - Absolutely, Derek...

 

PWH - It's Dennis. Dennis Kletsky.

 

BSS - Does it matter? You IWC (Internet Wrestling Community) marks got a scoop to report, and you're talkin' to a man who's got a lot of scoop.

 

PWH - First off, Scott, how about you tell us how and what you are doing right now.

 

BSS - I'm in Pittsburgh Steel Wrestling, baby! I'm just glad Mitch (Naess) and Alex (Braun) gave me this golden opportunity to show the people of Pennsylvania what Big Smack Scott Sinclair can do. (opens a beer for himself and another one for this writer) But yeah, it kinda sucks that I lost to Ian (Madman Boone) in my first match. Still, I've got something I never was gonna get in the SWF...a main event push.

 

PWH - We're gonna be covering a lot of topics, including several fan questions and perhaps a few questions on the Flight to Disaster. Are you comfortable with discussing these things?

 

BSS - I'm comfortable with discussing anything, man. Anything goes in this interview, Devin, and the more controversial...the better.

 

PWH (ignoring the fact the Smacker once again messed up the interviewer's name) - How's PSW been so far for you, Scott?

 

BSS - The fans at PSW are great, man, I've got really major heel heat and unlike in Supreme, Mitch and Alex encourage me to fight with the fans, you know, chuck their beer or tobacco spit or piss cups back at 'em, deck fans who get unruly and stuff...

 

PWH - I dunno, Scott, you sure they really encourage such behavior?

 

BSS - If it makes for good, interactive viewing, why the f--- not? That's one thing about Supreme, man, they never let me tap into my full potential as a hated heel, and when they made me work as a face, they didn't want me actin' so edgy.

 

PWH - And how are the workers over at PSW? Any new friends you've made in your first few weeks at Pittsburgh Steel?

 

BSS - Xavier Reckless is the closest thing out there to a Kurt Laramee backstage. Me and X, we're real tight, we shoot the shit after shows, get loaded at the local bars and strip clubs, you know, real brotherly stuff me, Kurt and KP (Avatar) used to do.

 

PWH - We've got a whole lot of questions here from Pro Wrestling Hits fans around the world...some via live chat, some from our official Facebook account, some from Twitter. We've got three here from Straight Shooters superfan MichiganHero from Kilmarnock, Scotland. Here's the first. Ana Garcia, Emma Chase and Hannah - Date, Marry, Kill?

 

BSS (laughing) - You really want me to give you my answer?

 

PWH - Well, you did say anything goes in this interview, so fire away, Scott!

 

BSS - I'm gonna date Emma and dump her just like she dumped that Jack Bruce wannabe from Hollywood, Sammy Bach. One date, one screw, bada bing, bada boom, I'm gone. Gonna ignore her phone calls, text messages, change my number, and move on to the next, who'd probably be Ana Garcia. Now there's a reason why she isn't the next J-Lo or Gloria Estefan, and that's old man Eisen. Supreme Attitude Records is as shitty a label as the SWF is a wrestling promotion. I'm gonna marry her because...I dunno, man...she's got that fiery Latina blood in her, as sweet as she may look on camera. I like my women feisty, and they don't get much feistier than Ana. So Ana, if you're reading this interview, I'm single. You're single. Let's go watch a Pirates game or something next time you're in the Pittsburgh area. I'm gonna root for the (Cleveland) Indians, though, if they're in town. Gotta show love for MY home team.

 

PWH - Interesting, interesting. Now about Hannah...

 

BSS - Oh, am I gonna kill that b----, though I probably won't, because that's way too extreme for the Smacker. Here's the deal with Hannah Potter. She's got a taste for Eisen's Richard. That's why she's still working in Supreme even if she bores me to death with her hype promos.

 

PWH (stifling laughter) - Go on...

 

BSS - So don't go around believin' everything you hear about Potter being all sweet and virginal outside the ring as she is as Valiant's manager. She's done 'em all...Eisen, Chief, Bowen, McKing and McCallum...men with power and men with authority. All of 'em old enough to be her dad. That ain't the right way to make it to the top. And here's the sick part of it all. She rejected an offer from Playdude because it went against her morals. Dude, that's really twisted.

 

PWH - Whoa. (pauses) Well, MichiganHero has another question for you, Scott, actually two more, and here's the next. Who do you feel is to blame for you not taking your rightful place amongst the best in the business?

 

BSS - Silly question, man. But I've got two answers. Richard Eisen and Peter Michaels. Well, I've got to give it to f---in' Eisen, because despite all the scrutiny he got in the '90s for hiring all those 'roided-up jocks, he never lost his appetite for muscle. Rick Eisen is OBSESSED with muscle because that's what he always wanted, but couldn't quite get. Guy got pushed around in school for bein' a 99-pound weakling, goes on all those Charles Atlas phoney-baloney programs as a teenager growing up in Connecticut, but nothing seems to be workin'. So he tries to live vicariously through his son Eric, while hiring 'roid freak after 'roid freak after 'roid freak.

 

PWH - So that means you were one of them?

 

BSS - WAS one of them. I don't do that s--- anymore. But that's the thing. Eisen hired me, gave me this huge contract, and when my wrestling wasn't up to his standards, he gave instructions to his bookers...first Sam Keith, who didn't like me one bit, then Peter Michaels...to dig me deep into a hole and make sure I never got a good push. I did kinda like what Sam did for me in 2007, but it was more for Lobster Warrior (Chris Morrisette) than anyone else. You know, that angle where The Pain Alliance worked as Lobby's enforcers against his former buddies at the Underwater Union?

 

PWH - It was an odd pairing, Scott. Two kayfabe New York street thugs teaming up with a kid-friendly hero against three comic book villains.

 

BSS - But I liked it, man, at least we got probably our best run as babyfaces. As for Michaels, I gotta give him credit for tryin' to give me a pseudo-main event push as a face, but when you people started givin' shitty grades to my matches with Vengeance and (Tom) Gilmore, Michaels paid attention, and so did Eisen. That's when they started buryin' me, makin' me look like someone who 'roided up too often for his own good, when in reality, you'd have goofs like Remo and Fred Garcia shootin' up from time to time. Shit, man, I can do a Jose Canseco on the SWF with all the steroid abusers I've worked with in that promotion. I can rat 'em all out.

 

PWH - That's interesting, Scott, but you did mention the, uh...bad grades we gave your matches as something Richard Eisen and Peter Michaels paid too much attention to. So you're blaming US at PWH as well for pushing you back?

 

BSS - Absolutely. (smirks) Eisen and Michaels, they pay attention to you IWC dweebs more than you think they do.

 

PWH - Moving on, Scott, here's MichiganHero's third question. Do you have any plans to form your own promotion to stick it to the man?

 

BSS - F--- yeah, David.

 

PWH - It's Dennis.

 

BSS - Whatever, man. If I have my own promotion, just think of the stuff I can do. I'd probably take Mitch and Alex with me, and we can do DaVE better than anybody, even Mark Cuban, could. (pauses) Yeah, that would be a bitchin' idea. Big Smack Scott, Owner and Head Booker of the revitalized DaVE, and DaVE Unified Champion. I dare say I can do a better job than Naess and Braun if I get a chance to reintroduce the world to Danger and Violence Extreme.

 

PWH - And we've got another three questions from the PWH Facebook page, courtesy of Ricky from Mexico. First off, Ricky wants to know who you consider your greatest opponent in the ring.

 

BSS - Christian Faith, unquestionably. I've gotten in the ring more than a few times with him, and I've seen how he operates in the locker room. Guy's a real f---in' professional, never hurt anyone by accident, never said a dirty word since he became a Born Again Christian, never talked about anyone behind his back. Ain't no straighter shooter than Christian Faith. Christian, if you're reading this, I HAVE FAITH. Go kick Vengeance's ass for me at Master of Puppets, would you?

 

PWH - You mean in the ring, not outside the ring, right?

 

BSS - Yeah. I ain't got no issues with Vengeance, but since the Faith vs Vengeance feud is probably gonna be the only thing I'll be following now in Supreme, I'm for the good guy.

 

PWH - Ricky's second question is this: Who is the toughest wrestler in the company, now that you're gone from the SWF?

 

BSS (thinking) - Kurt's in RIPW and I'm in Pittsburgh, so who's left? Ah, shit, never mind, I'm gonna name someone who's stuck in Rhode Island, and it's not Kurt. I think Everest's a pretty tough bastard. I once saw that guy down 45 beers the night before a show, and he STILL gave the SWF Galaxy a pretty good squash versus one of those skinny jobbers...what's his name...Greg Rayne? Yeah, I remember now. Elmer had just returned to the SWF, while Rayne was on his way out.

 

PWH - They stretchered Greg Rayne out of the ring and he never came back to Supreme! (laughs) Until now, that is, though I think he and Everest are both in the RIPW with no hopes of getting called up soon. Anyway, I think what Ricky meant was toughest wrestler in the ring.

 

BSS - Alright, Dan, I mean Dennis, I'm going with Kurt Laramee, of course. That's one guy who's been f---ed over many times by creative just because he don't got technical skills. But that guy's legit tough, man. He was the toughest gangbanger from Lafayette (Indiana), which is kinda like bein' the best surfer in the North Pole, but he did spend time in jail as a teenager. He's more than just a kayfabe tough guy...Kurt Laramee is legit. In the ring, that guy don't get hurt or injured or sidelined or whatever. You want boring technical duels? Go push Morrisette or McClean or any one of those aging jabronis. You want excitement? Go push The Pain Alliance.

 

PWH - Finally, Ricky wants to know if you have any plans on hoping to join one of the other Big Three companies...

 

BSS - F--- yeah, I'd love it if Hollywood (TCW) gives me some love. I see where I can fit in their plans. Right now the hot feud involves (Tommy) Cornell and (Wolf) Hawkins versus The Freedom Fighters...RDJ (Ricky Dale Johnson) and (Joey) Minnesota. I'd make a good third Freedom Fighter, but first, I'll probably be hyped as Cornell's blue-chip signing from back East. Then I'll turn around and nail Cornell with a Big Smack Shuffle in the middle of the ring just as he extends his hand, and the crowd will be goin' "BIG SMACK SCOTT! BIG SMACK SCOTT!" as I grab the mic from Cornell's hand and call out my childhood buddy from Noo Yawk, Mr. Joey Minnesota. In a couple months, Minnesota would beat Hawkins for the TCW World title with my help, while RDJ and me, we beat Texas Buffalo to a pulp and win those tag titles! Man, that is gonna be so over with the fans. As for USPW? I think I'm too young for Sam Strong to give me consideration. (laughs) Maybe in two, three years, once I'm 40. Still, it would be fun if I get to show the prunes and goody-two-shoes kids who watch USPW what REAL family entertainment is all about.

 

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

[Psycho Sam]

I've counted 5 s--ts and 6 f--ks in there, one must be worried about the other part of the interviews.

 

I cannot wait to see more from the Smacker.

 

Loved Mark Cubain Does DaVE, it was funny (and who's anus got quadrupely distorted in this game again?)

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - Before we bring you more of the Smacker, it's time for yet another dose of pseudo-reality programming courtesy of SWF High Stakes!

 

 

SWF High Stakes

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Wednesday, June 12, 2013 (Week 2)

 

 

CAST:

 

(Rookie - Mentor)

 

Nate "Fro Sure" Lee - Steve Frehley

Lazarus McKenzie - Eric Eisen

Kirk Jameson - Chris Morrisette

Calum Nelson - Captain Atomic and Jungle Lord (Hero Squad)

Ryan Turner - Huey Cannonball and Jefferson Stardust (The Awesomeness)

Dave Newton - Rich Money

Jimi Adams - James Prudence

Tommy "Scythe" Alexander - Brandon James

 

 

HIGH STAKES:

 

 

ANGLE - Nelson Strips and Attacks Runcord (46/D-)

 

 

Eve Runcord is backstage interviewing Calum Nelson, the male model slash SWF hopeful, and for most of the interview, he talks about himself, how good-looking he is, and how much he hates working with Hero Squad. As Eric Eisen walks by with his rookie Lazarus McKenzie, Nelson tries impressing the Supremacist by sneakily stripping off Runcord's halter top from behind...of course, she's wearing a bra underneath, so no need for the censors to worry! Nelson's next target is Runcord's skirt, but he stops short of that, as Eisen can be heard commenting about how some people just try too hard to impress.

 

 

ANGLE - Nelson and Captain Atomic Argue (60/C-)

 

 

Things continue to get worse for the arrogant male model as Captain Atomic notices what has happened...

 

Atomic - WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MAJOR MALEFICENT MALFUNCTION AT THE JUNCTION, CORPORAL CALUM NELSON!!!!

 

Nelson - I don't need to be told what to do by some pretend superhero like you! It's not like she wasn't wearin' anything underneath...

 

Atomic - THINK OF THE CHILDREN, CALUM NELSON!!!! THINK OF THE LITTLE PROTONS AND NEUTRONS, WITH THEIR LARGE HADRON PARENTS COVERING THEIR INNOCENT EYES AS YOU HAVE EXPOSED THEM TO THE BOUNTIFUL BOUNCING BAZINGAS OF ENCHANTING, EVERLASTING, EVER-LOVING, EVERLONG EVE RUNCORD!!!!!!

 

Nelson - Well, look who's talking. Or should I say, look who's SCREAMING. Hellooooo...I'm not deaf, Crazy Captain!

 

The argument is then interrupted by debuting High Stakes Head Trainer Rory McCallum, who tries to book a match between Nelson and Atomic...

 

McCallum - Fellas, is everything alright? I heard a lot of screaming, and...

 

Nelson - Everything's fine, Mr. McCallum, it's just that my co-mentor Captain Atomic thinks he's some radioactive superhero when he's nothing but a second-rate, trying hard Jim Force copycat. Jim Force was cool, wasn't he, Mr. McCallum? At least I thought he was...when I was eight.

 

McCallum - There will be no more mention of Jim Force here in this locker room, do I make myself clear, Calum? Now since you don't seem to be getting along with your mentors, how about YOU get in the ring tonight against Captain Atomic?

 

Nelson - What if I don't want to? What if I want Jungle Lord instead? Jungle Lord don't care, right?

 

Atomic - YOU SAY ANOTHER WORD, WORD, WORD ABOUT THE JUNGLE LORD, LORD, LORD AND I WILL BE FORCED TO GET RAAAAAAADIOOOOOOO...

 

McCallum (holding up his hand) - Then Jungle Lord it is. I advise you not to get complacent, Calum, because...

 

Nelson - ...because Jungle Lord lose. Thank you, Mr. McCallum.

 

 

Ryan Turner (w/The Awesomeness) vs Dave Newton (w/Rich Money) (9/F)

 

 

This match is described by Peter Michaels as the "Battle of Canada", pitting Kamloops' own "Rockin'" Ryan Turner versus Toronto's Triple Threat, Dave Newton. Turner gets a lot of chances to show off his impressive aerial moves, but the speed metal freak gets trapped in an STF at the four-minute mark, giving Rich Money's charge his first High Stakes win.

 

WINNER - Newton in 4:16

 

 

ANGLE - Chase Hypes Alexander vs Lee (34/E)

 

 

What's this...dollar signs on High Stakes? Ms. Emma Chase is making a rare appearance here as she hypes Chase SinCorporated EVP Brandon James' charge, Tommy "Scythe" Alexander, in his match against Nate "Fro Sure" Lee. She refers to Alexander as the spitting image of Vengeance, and tips him as a future SinCorporated member. Could she be planning to expand the stable again following Rich Money's purchase of The Can't Miss Prospects? Highly unlikely, as Alexander's way too similar to Vengeance when working the Scythe gimmick.

 

 

ANGLE - Alexander Vignette (21/E)

 

 

This vignette tells us more about Tommy Alexander, a former high school basketball star center who flamed out in the NCAA because his teammates and coaches found him too weird. But, as Alexander says, nothing's weird about being fascinated with the dark side, because one can only see the light if he knows how the other half lives. Right. Alexander briefly hypes his mentor, Brandon James, as the smartest man in the SWF, and also a phenomenal powerhouse and skilled wrestler who's best served mentoring fellow big guys like him. He closes the vignette with these words - "On High Stakes, I have no choice but to answer to the name Tommy. But once I win that guaranteed contract, all of you will have no choice but to call me Scythe."

 

 

ANGLE - Lee Vignette (40/D-)

 

 

Same vignette we saw on the June 4 Supreme TV - Nate "Fro Sure" Lee talking about his mentor, Steve Frehley, his "day job" as a hip-hop and R&B singer on Brother Grimm's label, and how he believes his entertainment skills and hard work could offset his weaknesses in the ring.

 

 

Nate Lee (w/Steve Frehley) vs Tommy Alexander (w/Brandon James and Ms. Emma Chase) (30/E)

 

 

Both High Stakes rookies show just how raw they are in this match, botching several moves and pissing off the crowd at McGaw, including some who are chanting "STICK TO HIP HOP! (CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP)" at Lee. While Brandon James and Emma Chase look on in stone silence as Alexander tries some Vengeance-esque moves (including a very awkward-looking chokeslam), Steve Frehley is as hands-on as you can get as a mentor. Lee is about to cover Alexander after a Sure Thing when Chase distracts Jez McArthuer with the dollar signs. That allows James to hit the ring and smash Lee with a chair shot, but McArthuer hears the chair shot and calls for Alexander to be DQ'd!

 

WINNER - Lee in 6:18 via DQ

 

 

ANGLE - Frehley and James Brawl (79/B)

 

 

James and Chase are backstage with Alexander when Frehley grabs James, bodyslams him on one of the locker room benches, and peppers his face with punches! Both men furiously get at each other for a bit, until Rory McCallum and a few officials break things up between the two mentors.

 

 

ANGLE - McKenzie Vignette (45/D-)

 

 

In what can be best described as stretching of the truth, the former Lassana Makutsi cuts this vignette under his new nom de guerre, Lazarus McKenzie. In a phony-sounding Jamaican accent, McKenzie admits that he was born in Kenya before moving to Jamaica and gaining the attention of U.S. colleges due to his proficiency in amateur wrestling. He highlights his dominance as a freshman and sophomore wrestling for the Georgetown Hoyas, and while he admits that he comes from a school that has long been a bitter rival of Eric Eisen's (semi-kayfabe) alma mater of Syracuse, he's also glad that Eisen is his mentor, because like Eric, he loves having a good time after the show and, if possible, during the show. McKenzie closes his vignette by dancing to the tune of his ring music and holding up his index finger, as if to say he'll be number one in the first season of High Stakes.

 

 

Kirk Jameson (w/Chris Morrisette) vs Lazarus McKenzie (w/Eric Eisen) (38/D-)

 

 

Just like Morrisette vs Eisen, this is a battle of technician vs brawler, and everything is open all the way, with a healthy dose of bare knuckle boxing and submission wrestling from Jameson, and an all-out, impact move-oriented attack from McKenzie. Eisen tries several times to distract referee Darren Smith AND Jameson, but to no avail - McKenzie taps out of the Kirk-Hold after just a few seconds! Eric Eisen looks especially disappointed at his rookie's failure to capitalize on the distractions.

 

WINNER - Jameson in 8:09

 

 

ANGLE - Eisen and McKenzie Argue (55/D+)

 

 

As McKenzie crawls out of the ring, he is immediately met by an angry Eric Eisen, as mentor and rookie argue loudly on the way back to the locker room. Eisen keeps screaming about McKenzie's lack of focus, while McKenzie hardly gets a word in edgewise. It's clear that Double E is in a very foul mood, and upset about all those distractions going to waste.

 

 

ANGLE - Adams and Prudence Training Montage (46/D-)

 

 

Jimi Adams, the High Flyin' Hawaiian, has drawn a bye for today, so he's focusing on training in the gym with his mentor, James Prudence. The two namesakes spot each other, bond over surfing and wrestling talk, and seem to be one of the few rookie-mentor combos who are actually getting along fabulously and not having to resort to arguments after the rookie loses or fails to live up to expectations.

 

 

ANGLE - Jungle Lord Gets Ready (61/C-)

 

 

Jungle Lord vs Calum Nelson (w/Captain Atomic) (60/C-)

 

 

At first, it looks like Jungle Lord really doesn't care, as he allows Nelson to run roughshod on him. Peter Michaels and Katie Cameron observe as much from the announce table. And with all that in mind, Captain Atomic encourages Jungle Lord more than he does their own rookie. After several false finishes, Nelson steps out of the ring and pantomimes wiping his buttocks with Jungle Lord's loincloth. That's all the impetus Jungle Lord needs, as the Wild Man of Borneo turns into a man possessed, seemingly getting the fire back and finally giving Nelson a hard time with most of his signature moves. After a belly-to-back suplex on Nelson, Jungle Lord climbs the ropes and comes crashing down on Nelson with a Jungle Jack-Jammer! This one's over, and hopefully it's enough to help Jungle Lord find his missing mojo.

 

WINNER - Jungle Lord in 7:38

 

 

WEEK TWO STANDINGS:

 

Kirk Jameson - 2-0

Ryan Turner - 1-1

Calum Nelson - 1-1

Lazarus McKenzie - 1-1

Dave Newton - 1-1

Nate Lee - 1-1

Jimi Adams - 0-1

Tommy Alexander - 0-2

 

 

Overall Grade - 60/C-

High Stakes TV Rating - 0.85

[Rone Rivendale]

ANGLE - Champion Rants About Money

 

Isn't that usually behind the scenes? lol

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - I've decided to post the second half of Big Smack Scott's interview before Master of Puppets, right after a backstage segment and before the show. In the meantime, predictions are once again open! Pre-show predictions for Master of Puppets shall serve as the bonus questions...

 

 

SWF Master of Puppets

Greenwalt Dome (Tri State)

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, no stipulations)

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money © - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

 

 

SWF Uprising

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Sunday, June 16, 2013

 

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

Mikey James vs ?????

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

[Rickymex]

SWF Master of Puppets

Greenwalt Dome (Tri State)

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, no stipulations)

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

 

 

SWF Uprising

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Sunday, June 16, 2013

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

Mikey James vs ?????

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

[Psycho Sam]

SWF Master of Puppets

Greenwalt Dome (Tri State)

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, Chair on A Pole match)

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

EISEN!!!!!!!!

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

Pelvic Thrust through a table.

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

The stretcher is way too light for Marat. Thus, Bruce shall lose.

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

 

 

SWF Uprising

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Sunday, June 16, 2013

 

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

I wanna go with The Weed Smoking Psychedelic Soul Brothers, but I see Japan winning.

Mikey James vs Lucha Cop

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

[Midnightnick]

SWF Master of Puppets

Greenwalt Dome (Tri State)

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, no stipulations)

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

 

 

SWF Uprising

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Sunday, June 16, 2013

 

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

Mikey James vs ?????

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

[flaviooooo]

SWF Master of Puppets

Greenwalt Dome (Tri State)

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, no stipulations)

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money © - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

 

 

SWF Uprising

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Sunday, June 16, 2013

 

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

Mikey James vs ?????

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

[Croquemitaine]

SWF Master of Puppets

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, no stipulations)

- Spade joins Almighty Dollar after winning the belt and briefly gives them all the gold

 

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

- I believe one of these men has creative control, plus a stable of buddies who are happy to interfere

 

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

- I think the blow-off waits for Supreme Challenge

 

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

- Allied Forces don't seem to be on the same page yet

 

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

- Bruce can recover from the loss better than Khoklov

 

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

- Short title runs aren't popular, but I smell a swerve coming in this storyline

 

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

- You haven't been pushing James like a top guy and there hasn't been enough build up for this match to make me think he goes over here

 

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

- An appearance by the mystery attackers will prevent the title from changing hands even if Champion does pull out a win

 

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

- I have faith?

 

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money © - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

- Gilmore is my fave C-Verse worker, but I don't think he's quite to main title level yet. Either way, this should be an awesome match.

 

 

 

SWF Uprising

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

- Welcome to Jobsville, USA!

 

Mikey James vs ?????

- James is a top guy on Uprising. If ????? is someone big enough to go over him, the match should be higher on the card

 

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

- Unless Ginsberg is getting punished for his failed drug test

 

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

- It's become obvious that the booker hates Greed & Envy

 

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

- Cage is getting more screen time, but Taylor is still the bigger name and even a potential main eventer down the line

 

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

- The Awesomeness either win now or they might as well put on masks and become Part #3 and Part #4

 

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

- Is Jungle Lord back?

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - Yes, MichiganHero, he is who you think he is! This segment is dedicated to #TeamPuwowesu... ...and for the second part of the BSS interview and Master of Puppets, expect those in about 1-2 days.

 

 

"Dirty Laundry, Parental Abuse and a Self-Proclaimed MVP"

 

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Greenwalt Dome

7:00 p.m.

 

 

I had just read Big Smack Scott's shoot interview with Pro Wrestling Hits. Aside from hinting that I had joined him and Kurt Laramee in their strip club escapades, most of the vitriol was aimed at Richard Eisen and Peter Michaels. Oh, and Hannah Potter too, as I had spotted her earlier, being comforted by Dawn, crying about something. That's when I had first read the interview, and actually read it in its entirety on Dawn's giant-sized Galaxy Note 2.

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/HannahPotter_zps27ae3815.jpg

 

 

"Somebody better sue Scott Sinclair," sobbed Hannah as I quietly read through the interview. Man, did Sinclair have a lot to say to PWH. And a lot of it wasn't pretty.

 

Also, some people didn't have anything better to do than taunt Scott's "victims" about what he had said, regardless of whether it was true or not. "Hey, Hannah, how many inches was Chief's?", taunted the ever-tactless Huey Cannonball.

 

"Knock it off, Huey!", I yelled, before turning to Hannah. Some Klubb members can be so insensitive. "Damn...he still believes you're keeping an SWF job because you're, you know...ah, never mind. Scott keeps talking out of his ass, and he's sure to unload more in the second part."

 

"Kletsky said it's gonna be more explosive than the first," warned Dawn. "But I believe you, babe. I know you didn't go to those strip bars with Kurt and Scott. And even if you did..."

 

"I actually did. Once."

 

"It doesn't matter. That happened before you and I became a couple. But I hope the locker room doesn't take it the wrong way. The Klubb's been all over Hannah because of what that bastard had to say."

 

"The Klubb will always be the Klubb," I replied, before focusing my attention again on poor Hannah. "Now Hannah, you know me and the rookies and most of the vets don't believe Sinclair. And the guy has zero credibility. It's all gonna blow over."

 

"I hope it does," replied Hannah in between sobs. "I really hope so."

 

As for me, I decided to walk around a bit and see how the new kid we had just hired was fitting in.

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/PeterMichaels.jpghttp://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/AlanParent_zpse1108a19.jpg

 

 

"Ever considered working as my kayfabe son?" Peter Michaels was interviewing the rookie, as we had him backstage for Master of Puppets as a special guest...the SWF making the new kid feel right at home.

 

"Me? I dunno, Sir."

 

"Call me Pete or Peter, we're pretty informal like that."

 

The rookie was now pondering yet another Peter Michaels gimmick, an abysmal one, though I didn't say it right then and there - somebody else would, but we'll get to that later. "My Canadian accent will give me away," said the rookie. "I don't think I can speak like a down-home Texas cowboy like y'all."

 

Peter's face had flushed a bit following that rather tactless, stereotyping comment from the new guy. Yes, it seemed like the rumors regarding his attitude were quite accurate. "Uh, Alan, not all Texans speak with strong accents, and the fact that I do doesn't make me a down-home Texas cowboy." Peter, nice guy that he is, tried not to look or sound too offended. "But it would've been swell," he continued. "Alan Michaels, Peter's jobber son, the ultimate underdog."

 

"Besides, everyone in the IWC knows you've got two adult daughters, no sons. Nobody's gonna buy that." Whoa. This kid may have been right, but he was getting fresh with the head booker, right after the SWF sprung for his plane ticket to East Rutherford, right after the SWF was nice enough to have him hang around in the locker room on a PPV night.

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/EricEisen_alt2_zps23d12aee.jpg

 

 

"You better listen to him, Pete," said Eric Eisen, walking in and making his grand return to the locker room. "The era of kayfabe sons and daughters ended fifteen years ago." Eric Eisen was back right in time for Master of Puppets, and he was right back in the politicking scene. "Well, what do we have here? A new boy?"

 

"Hey, man, thanks for saving my ass," said the cocky newcomer, extending his hand. "Alan Parent. And you must be Eric Eisen?"

 

"...and that's more than enough. Put it there, buddy!" Eric and this Alan Parent guy exchanged a firm handshake, which was quite odd, even considering Parent's attitude. Eric was never the type to be overly friendly with the rookies. "Uncle Pete tryin' to give you a lousy gimmick just because you're new here?"

 

"He sure is..."

 

"Eric, I will not have any of that behavior in this locker room," Peter said, quite sternly. "Now you're lucky I'm not suspending you or anything for disappearing to New York a couple days back. But in this locker room, we have rules, and one of those is to respect the head booker. And let that be a lesson to you too, Alan."

 

"Can't you put the Bumfholes in the pre-show?", complained Eric. "The Bumfholes are in the midcard, and I'm main event talent. I don't understand why you're putting me and Adam in the dark match portion, because, you see...I'm supposed to be back in the title hunt. This is a PPV, after all. I'll be back in contention for North American, right?"

 

"If you behave yourself," said Peter, "maybe you'll be in contention for Supreme Heavyweight or World Heavyweight. Maybe you'll get that face turn you want, because your current gimmick is simply not going to go over with the fans and have 'em turn you face. But if you keep acting this way..."

 

"Then what?"

 

"Then you can take your talents elsewhere and I won't think twice about letting you walk."

 

"Yeah? You may talk contract, but my dad approves the deals. You may not need Eric Eisen, but the SWF does. Ask Brandon. Ask my dad, my brother, ask Emma or Barry or his daughter. I'm not like that dirty laundry-airing Big Smack Scott, and you better read his PWH interview..."

 

"I already did, and it's nothing. Nothing but lies, bitterness and exaggerations."

 

"But just as I was saying, the SWF needs me. And so do rookies such as Mr. Parent over here." Having said that, Eric walked away and left everybody scratching their heads and wishing he'd do just that - take his talents to Hollywood, Miami, Canada or wherever.

 

Alan Parent in the Klubb? We'll see aboot that.

[Oregano Jensen]

Alan Parent, huh? That Eisen sure does know how to pick a winner...

 

SWF Master of Puppets

Greenwalt Dome (Tri State)

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

Frankie Perez © vs Cameron Vessey vs Spencer Spade - SWF Shooting Star title match (pre-show, no stipulations)

 

Hard to see why this would happen now... Vessey and Spade both have some momentum, but Perez is just fine where he is.

 

Captain Atomic vs Eric Eisen (pre-show, no stipulations)

 

Eisen gets his back after losing the title.

Randy Bumfhole vs The Zim - Tables Match

 

Zim has looked sharper, and the first match always goes to the heel.

 

The Can't Miss Prospects © vs The Allied Forces - Hardcore Match for SWF World Tag Team Titles

 

Got to agree with the Entourage here, sadly enough -- the Forces haven't found the momentum to take this belt.

 

Jack Bruce vs Marat Khoklov - Ambulance Match

 

This stipulation favors a big man like Khoklov, but there is no need to put a part-time attraction and mediocre wrestler over one of the company's marquee faces. So Bruce will find a way -- not sure how, but Bruce will find a way.

 

Chris Morrisette vs Squeeky McClean © - Lumberjack Match for SWF North American title

 

Probably some kind of lumberjack-related shenanigans. McClean is probably a transitional title-holder, but THIS transitional? And Morrisette seems like the gatekeeper of the main event, not the king of the midcard -- though then again, it's a natural transition.

 

Steve Frehley vs Brandon James - Falls Count Anywhere Match for third spot at Supreme Challenge World Heavyweight Title match

 

Frehley has not produced in the ring. I just don't see him being elevated to title contention if he can't put on a worthy match once he gets there.

Nicky Champion vs Remo © - Ladder Match for SWF World Heavyweight title

 

Champion has been great, don't get me wrong. But Remo has not shown a bit of weakness since this year started.

Christian Faith vs Vengeance - Steel Cage Match

 

There's no profit in pushing 46-year-old Faith, but Vengeance is similar if younger: a guy whose value rests in a lot of things, but really not his performance in the ring or his future prospects. I can't see heels winning all three of these... I think a face takes one of the ME titles at Challenge, but not now. Shocking that this is the semi-main, by the way -- there's no way it outperforms Remo-Champion.

 

Tom "Angry" Gilmore vs Rich Money © - Last Man Standing Match for SWF Supreme Heavyweight title

 

Much as I like Gilmore, he's just barely crawled into the main event he's deserved for years. One day, I will bet on Rich Money and I will be wrong. That's the price I pay for betting on Rich Money and being right so many times.

 

SWF Uprising

McGaw Arena (Tri State)

Sunday, June 16, 2013

 

 

Koshiro Ino and Biggz in Japan vs Robbie Retro and The Psychedelic Soul Brothers

 

As if the Brothers didn't seem hapless enough, now they have to carry around Robby "Jobster Warrior" Retro?

 

Mikey James vs ?????

 

James basks in the reflected glow of de facto Uprising Guy champion Frankie Perez, taking down some irrelevant jobber or other.

 

KC Glenn vs Asher Ginsberg

 

No reason to believe Glenn is suddenly able to win matches.

 

The Platinum Blondes vs Greed and Envy

 

Part of being a gatekeeper is that sometimes the other guy cannot get past the gate.

 

Joshua Taylor vs Roger Cage

 

We're starting to get into the "could win a match on the main show" part of the card. Not you, Roger.

 

The Awesomeness vs The Eisen Entourage

 

Klubb-on-Klubb violence! Seriously, though, the Awesomeness fade into the background with regularity. If there's any reason for their opponents to win, they do the job. if there's any reason for their opponents to take a loss, they win. Simple as that.

 

Hero Squad vs 24/7 Partay Dudez

 

Hero Squad were winning even when Jungle Lord looked hopeless. Now that he's slowly regaining his fire, which I imagine will happen after his High Stakes win (of all things), I don't see them mucking that up by giving the Squad a loss against lower-level opposition.

[Psycho Sam]

YES! Alan Pawent in the SWF! Team Puwowesu is finally taking over.

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - Making a last call for predictions, as I hope to have Master of Puppets up tomorrow! And as promised, Big Smack Scott's back with the second part of his shoot interview.

 

 

PRO WRESTLING HITS PRESENTS - STRAIGHT SHOOTERS

By Dennis Kletsky

 

Saturday, June 15, 2013

 

 

RING RATS, 'ROIDS AND STIFF SHOTS - BIG SMACK SCOTT REVEALS ALL!!! (PART 2)

 

 

Previously on Straight Shooters, you read the first part of my interview with Scott "Big Smack Scott" Sinclair, which can be found here - in the first part, the Smacker answered a series of questions, mostly from Pro Wrestling Hits' Facebook fans just a few days ahead of the scheduled interview, and in the second part, he'll be answering more fan questions (or detractor questions), as well as a few I had specially prepared for the chat. By the second part of the interview, Scott was getting more and more inebriated (as he'd already had a few beers before I dropped by his apartment in Pittsburgh), and what you'll be reading here promises to be more explosive and revealing than the first.

 

 

DISCLAIMER - The views presented by Mr. Scott Sinclair do not represent the views of ProWrestlingHits.com.

 

 

http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm87/endshiftresign/TEW%202013/BigSmackScottalt3_zps4b3a107a.jpg

 

 

Pro Wrestling Hits - Alright, that was a great storyline you had cooked up for TCW, should they sign you. Feeling psyched up to work with Joey Minnesota if you get the chance?

 

Big Smack Scott (still messing up the interviewer's name) - F--- yeah, Darren, that guy can make anyone look like a million dollars. Minnesota's better in that regard than anyone, except perhaps Christian Faith. Rich Money ain't got nothin' on J-Minny.

 

PWH - I'll be looking forward to that. Anyway, more reader questions here, including three from Big Jon the Legend, from Parts Unknown.

 

BSS - Tell Big Jonny that Greg and Matt Gauge called, they want their identities back! (laughs) That's what those bastards get for thinkin' they can get by on their dad Sam Keith's name. Creative puts 'em in masks and makes them lose week after week after week. That's karma for (Richard) Eisen, for throwin' Sam Keith under the bus and karma for Keith for writing that shitty Election storyline.

 

PWH - I don't see how that makes sense, but let's move on to Big Jon's questions. He's asking about your favorite opponent and match.

 

BSS - Big Smack Scott versus Vengeance for the SWF World Heavyweight title. That match lasted 13 minutes, and 'cept for the fans who were cheering the heel Vengeance and tellin' me never to come back, it was fantastic. I nearly had Sean (Martyn, a.k.a. Vengeance) pinned several times, and if I was head booker, I would've gotten him in the Smack-Over Toehold Facelock, my STF variation, and had Ric Young or somebody ring the f---in' bell even if Vengeance didn't submit. Ah, what coulda been. The Mayor Street Screwjob, architect, Big Smack Scott. (pauses) As for my favorite opponents, perhaps Christian Faith, 'coz he can make me look even better, and KP Avatar, until he started dating that Strzempka girl (Dawn the Cheerleader) and hangin' out with those rookie dipshits.

 

PWH - I didn't know you had such a move, Scott. Smack-Over Toehold Facelock?

 

BSS - That's because Michaels never let me use it. Fat bastard...

 

PWH - Jon's second question is about who's the best wrestler in PSW and whether you can beat him or not.

 

BSS - X (Xavier Reckless) is my best buddy (in PSW), but the best wrestler, for me, is Grandmaster Phunk. He's also working as a heel, so one time I suggested to him that we team up and call ourselves The Pimp Alliance. (laughs) He hasn't gotten back to me yet. But if Mitch (Naess) or Alex (Braun) decides for me to turn babyface, f--- yeah, I can beat Danny (Bolte, a.k.a. Grandmaster Phunk).

 

PWH - I think you already mentioned this earlier, but Big Jon the Legend also asked if you're still 'roiding up.

 

BSS - Read my lips, Don. No more steroids.

 

PWH - For the last time, Scott, my name is Dennis, and I guess that settles the steroid thing.

 

BSS - Look, man, you can doubt me all you wanna, but my conscience is clean. I'm hittin' the gym regularly, and that keeps me looking like a million bucks. I don't need steroids anymore and that's all you need to know.

 

PWH - And here's one from another Parts Unknown guy, Croquemitaine. Which one wrestler working in North America today would you most want to build a company around, if you could sign them?

 

BSS - Me. Gonna show 'em all what the world was missing when Michaels, Rick Eisen, Keith and all those other dorks did when they were holdin' me back. I'm a better brawler than Brandon James or Remo, a better stick man than, say, Jack Bruce, a better ring psychologist than the overrated Rich Money or Lobster Boy (Chris) Morrisette.

 

PWH - Noted, Scott. Guess having a Smacker Wrestling Federation wouldn't hurt, huh?

 

BSS - Smacker Wrestling ENTERTAINMENT.

 

PWH - Now I've got a few questions before the next batch, which comes from a dedicated group of fans called Team Puwowesu.

 

BSS - Whooooo, Team Puwowesu. Goo goo gaa gaa baby talkin' smarks, I assume?

 

PWH - No, Scott, they're huge puroresu fans who root for guys like (Canadian indie wrestler and recent SWF signing) Alan Parent and KP Avatar.

 

BSS - KP Avatar? F--- him!

 

PWH - We'll get to KP later, but first, I'd like to know for myself the real score behind The Flight to Disaster. What can you say about allegations that it was your actions that started the whole thing?

 

BSS - I had all the best intentions in mind, Doug. I treated the boys to beer, and it was the boys - people like Acid, who showed his wang to the stewardess, the Eisen brothers, The Awesomeness and Brandon James who got f---in' wasted on Johnnie Walker, Jungle Lord, who ordered the stewardesses around in character...

 

PWH - Jungle Lord?

 

BSS - Yeah, man. He was like, "Jungle Lord want beer! Stewardess bad woman!", beatin' his chest and yelling like a Tarzan clone...f---in' drunk, man. Then you had Chris Morrisette and Jack Bruce spraying shaving cream all over each other, Jason Azaria triggerin' a food fight...

 

PWH - And you urinating in the aisle because you couldn't hold your liquor. Is that true?

 

BSS - Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Can we move on to the next question? Because my firing from the SWF definitely was not a punishment that fit the crime. I had GOOD INTENTIONS, man! GOOD INTENTIONS!!! And I can't believe you have the cojones to accuse me of leadin' the boys to some wrestling Billabong or somethin'! (Scott probably meant Babylon - Ed.)

 

PWH - No, not at all, Scott, I just wanted to hear your side of the story.

 

BSS - Yeah? Well, I think you better move on to Team Wesupuwo's questions. (opens another beer and guns it down straight)

 

PWH - One more before we move on to 'em, hope that's okay. (clears throat) Here goes. How's your relationship right now with your brother, "Jammin'" James Sinclair? I believe he's been incarcerated for quite a while now for running afoul of the three strikes law in Texas. Drug use, right?

 

BSS - Yeah. And I'm not talkin' steroids here, I'm talkin' about the hard stuff. Kid f---ed up in the SWF, moved from state to state, got himself in the slammer instead of becoming a big star like me, so yeah, he dug his own grave. I feel no sympathy for what happened to James.

 

PWH - Question one - It seems you have a strong fanbase, cheering you on for such exploits as 'Unleashing the Shooting Smack Press (a Shooting Star Self Piledriver), giving steroids to Rich Eisen, and other superhuman tasks. Why do you patronize rookies such as Spencer Spade, KP Avatar, the Gauges, Lenny Brown and the like, when clearly, you could be training to lift Mt. Everest?

 

BSS - Good thing I've got fans out there who get it, though the Shooting Smack Press is a legit variation of the Shooting Star Press. What the f--- does that guy mean by self-piledriver? I ain't a comedy wrestler like those rookie doofuses like Ash Campbell or Sam Keith's Parts Unknown. As for giving steroids to Eisen, I never did that. (pauses) Patronizing rookies? Ain't never done such a thing. You know, man, I always call things as I see 'em. And the way I saw it was this - Spade and Brown kissed their Uncle Phil's (Enforcer Roberts) ass to get fast-tracked to the main roster. KP Avatar punched Eric Eisen in a Baltimore bar and became an instant hero...not to mention an instant swellhead and a bigger ass-kisser than he was on Day One. Now he's popular with almost everyone. The Gauges? I already told you my beef with 'em. They think they're hot shit because Sam Keith is their dad. That's the case with most of those second-gen kids - Ash Campbell, Cam Vessey, locker room Lolita Lisa Bowen...who else? Good thing Jay Chord can't sign with the SWF yet. But hey, if TCW signs me, I could probably drink Jason Ripperton Chord under the table before I beat the shit outta him for bein' all "my dad did this, my dad did that, I'm gonna be better than my dad" yada yada yada.

 

PWH - Here's one from Team Puwowesu's Psycho Sam. Will you have any plans to be a full fledged porno actor, with a sequel to Big Smacks & Big Racks? ("Big Smacks and Big Racks" is an adult film from 2005 released by Vivacious Video, starring Big Smack Scott as himself and former indie valet Dream Girl as the female lead - the film was shot and released sometime before Scott joined the SWF. It is widely considered one of the worst pornos released in the 21st century. - Ed.)

 

BSS - Why the f--- not, Donatello? But I'm not shooting it unless I get Sasha Grey or the immortal Jenna Jameson as my co-star.

 

PWH - Looks like somebody's ran out of D-names to call me. (laughs) But I guess it's all cool as long as they don't get Dream Girl to reprise her role. I haven't watched "Big Smacks" yet, but my little brother rented a copy when he was in junior high, right after it came out. David (the writer's brother) told me Dream Girl couldn't act for you-know-what.

 

BSS - That shit doesn't matter in adult films. NEXT!

 

PWH - Third question from Team Puwowesu. Throughout your final months in the SWF, you made a friend, KP Avatar. Where do you think he will be in...say...5-10 years? Would you see him with a world championship?

 

BSS - Let me tell you something, Dolph. (I guess he didn't run out of D-names after all! - Ed.) KP Avatar may say he's content and all losin' every week on Uprising, but he's still in creative. He's clearly kissin' Peter Michaels' ass and probably finding a way to get on the Klubb's good side. You know the Klubb, right? Eric Eisen's backstage faction. I gotta give it to you, KP. You're damn good at that ass-kissing thing, so here's how I see you in 5-10 years. You're gonna be SWF World Heavyweight Champion in 2023, and you're gonna be makin' babies with your Cheerleader girlfriend, who'll probably be your wife by then. You're gonna refuse to job to anyone, not even Spencer Spade, your fellow ass-kisser. You're gonna use your political connections to give Remmy Skye, Asher Ginsberg, Cam Vessey, you know, your no-talent band, moon pushes and key roles on and off-camera. Hell, you'd probably be head booker by then, most powerful man in wrestling since Sam Strong! (spits) You ain't any different from Eric Eisen, KP Avatar.

 

PWH - Scott, here's the final question from Team Puroresu, er...Puwowesu. You book SWF for a day. How would you book it?

 

BSS - Well, thank God that's over! Gimme a chance to book SWF for a day and I'm gonna put over the real talent in the ring and on the mic. People like myself, Kurt Laramee, Tom Gilmore, James Prudence, even Captain Atomic, and I'll give Christian Faith a key role till he's 55 or 60, because he's an iron man like that, and one of the best of all time, if not the best. As for those second-generation kids and overrated rookies? (laughs) I'd probably leave 'em off the show and recommend them to old man Eisen for future endeavors.

 

PWH - I guess that's all the questions we have for now, and I'd like to thank our fans for helping me out with all those interesting queries for the Smacker!

 

BSS - Yeah, you IWC jerks know how to write a good story. I want you to publish everything in this interview, warts and all.

 

PWH - Will do, Scott. But take note that your opinions are not necessarily those of Pro Wrestling Hits dot com.

 

BSS - Whatever.

[Bigjondalegend]

That was a very entertaining shoot

Hope u keep us up to date with his big acheivements *sarcasm* in his pittsburg

[Oregano Jensen]

So... pretty much EVERYONE likes Faith and Gilmore, no?

[3rdStringPG]

OOC - Show will be up in a few hours!

 

That was a very entertaining shoot

Hope u keep us up to date with his big acheivements *sarcasm* in his pittsburg

 

Thanks! Yes, I'll be keeping you guys posted alright...for now he's had only one PSW appearance, and he lost to Madman Boone in a title match.

 

So... pretty much EVERYONE likes Faith and Gilmore, no?

 

They're the locker room leaders, so yeah, they're loved and respected by almost everybody. Emphasis on almost...

 

EDIT - I just checked the first diary and did notice I wrote some segments where BSS was bitching about Faith...a bit. Let's just say the Smacker was paying Faith and Gilmore (and, in a way, Vengeance) lip service on his shoot interview because of their esteemed reputation in the locker room, and because he didn't want to come about as a guy who hates everyone in the SWF...just most of 'em.