X-Over Fighting [9000-Verse]

[OctoberRaven]

http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/metalgear/images/c/c0/Art-mgsv-logo-xof-s.jpg

 

In 2008, a mysterious figure known only as Cipher collected twelve of the deadliest combatants the multiverse to battle in a new arena: X-Over Fighting (said out loud as Cross-Over Fighting).

 

To what purpose? Who knows. And who exactly is Cipher? Nobody knows that either. But, hopefully we will get some cool fighting out of it.

 

MAIN EVENTERS:

Brock Lesnar [Real World]- Battle Hungry

Eric Draven [Crow]- Brooding

Karin Kanzuki [street Fighter]- Spoilt Brat

Little Mac [Punch-Out]- Boxer

 

UPPER MIDCARD:

Buffy Summers [buffyverse]- Demon Slayer

Casey Jones [TMNT-Verse]- Vigilante

Earthworm Jim [EWJ]- Comical Badass

Sonic The Hedgehog [sonic]- Speedster

 

MIDCARD

Chell [HalfLife3Confirmed]- Mysterious

Hit Girl [Kick-Ass]- Danger Child

Marty McFly [bTTF]- Time Traveler

Taokaka [blazBlue]- Nekomimi

 

ROAD AGENT/OWNER/BOOKER

Cipher (Real Name ???) [???] - ???

 

REFEREE

Ethan Mars [Heavy Rain]- Average Guy

 

ANNOUNCE TEAM

Joey Styles [Real World]- Announcer

The Truth [Rockstarverse]- Hippy

 

COMING UP: XOF1, a tournament for the XOF King of X-over title!

[Fleisch]

Sounds intriguing. I shall be reading. <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/smile.png.142cfa0a1cd2925c0463c1d00f499df2.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

[OctoberRaven]

<p><strong>XOF 1</strong></p><p> </p><p>

We open with <strong>Joey Styles and The Truth</strong> hyping up tonight's event, which will determine the King of X-Over. There will be six singles matches, standard wrestling rules, with the winners going to a six-way "Super Smash Rules" match to determine the winner. Styles notes that Cipher has drawn all these matches at random while The Truth speculates that Cipher is in fact a mad scientist looking for combat data to program a robot army with, which Joey Styles dismisses as "crazy talk"</p><p>

(30)</p><p> </p><p>

We now find out who will be in XOF's first match. First out to "Still Alive" comes the enimatic mute warrior Chell with her Portal Gun, and the fans are ecstatic to see her! Eric Draven comes out to "Burn" by The Cure and the crowd aren't sure what to make of the black leather clad combatant, or the crow perched on his shoulder.</p><p>

(27)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Match 1: Chell vs Eric Draven</strong></p><p>

Draven dominated early on but Chell would make a comeback with help of her Portal Gun. Joey Styles questions the legality of the Portal Gun but Truth notes that the Gun doesn't directly attack Draven, but rather allows Chell to use the portals as an enviromental element. Referee Ethan Mars allows it, however, and after a bulldog Chell fires a blue portal on the roof directly above Draven, climbing to the top rope before firing the orange portal on the mat. She goes for a frog splash into the orange portal, but Draven rolls away and Chell hits canvas and misses the "Portal Splash". Stunned, Chell falls victim to Draven's running DDT, called "Murder of Crows" and Draven gets the fall.</p><p>

(47)</p><p> </p><p>

Now we find out who the next draws are. "Gotta Go Fast" is heard as the veteran Sonic The Hedgehog comes out to a strong reaction. "The Power of Love" by Huey Lewis and the News brings out Marty McFly, who also gets some support from the crowd.</p><p> </p><p>

However, the crowd didn't seem to think this was going to be competitive...</p><p>

(9)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Match 2: Sonic The Hedgehog vs Marty McFly</strong></p><p>

And sure enough, try as Marty might to get any offense he just was unprepared to take on Sonic, who would make quick work of the youngster with a few Spin Charge tackles, before using a Spin Charge to set up a Superman Punch-style elbow smash, the "Sonic Elbow". The pinfall was academic and Sonic would advance with little difficulty.</p><p>

(16)</p><p> </p><p>

Time for the third match, and the mellow tune of "Catus Carnival" heralded Taokaka, and the fans were thrilled to see her (though maybe that was because she's a catgirl). However, things did not look good for Tao as "Face Fisted" by Dethklok signalled the arrival of Brock Lesnar!</p><p>

(18)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Match 3: Taokaka vs Brock Lesnar</strong></p><p>

However a one-sided match this was anything but as Tao's unorthodox hit and run tactics with lots of fakeouts and rebounds off the ropes made this is a tough battle for the Beast Incarnate. Eventually though he caught one of her lunges and took her to SUPLEX CITY. An F5 was escaped and Taokaka nearly got the win with a crucifix, but when she tried to leap on top of Lesnar for one of her big moves, Lesnar grabbed her arm and broke it with a Kimura to secure the win.</p><p>

(42)</p><p> </p><p>

After the ring was cleared, an instrumental version of the TMNT theme heralded the arrival of the Ninja Turtle ally Casey Jones, while the Punch Out fight song introduced the one and only Little Mac. The crowd again feared a one-sided battle, after all, Mac TKOd Tyson...</p><p>

(10)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Match 4: Casey Jones vs Little Mac</strong></p><p>

However the brawl was all Casey Jones as he attacked Mac before the bell, nearly getting DQed for dirty tactics and throwing Mac into the ringpost. Mac proved to be resilient and got back into the ring, using his footwork and elusiveness to avoid Casey's streetfighting tactics and deliver some powerful blows of his own. Casey got frustrated and looked for his cricket bat (which Joey was quick to note was definitely an offensive weapon and thus illegal). Casey looked for his "Six Runs" knockout swing but Mac ducked it and floored Casey with the Star Punch and got the three count!</p><p>

(37)</p><p> </p><p>

The crowd didn't know what to make of either of the next to combatants. Earthworm Jim came out to his iconic theme, while HIt-Girl drove to ringside on her Ducati to "Bad Reputation".</p><p>

(10)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Match 5: Earthworm Jim vs Hit-Girl</strong></p><p>

HG had the skills and Jim underestimated the pint-sized brawler at first, but the experience of the World's Strongest Earthworm. The Worm of Steel would look for his "Eat Dirt" Special, a delayed 180 turn bodyslam driver, but Hit-Girl escaped and drew a gun at Jim, hitting him in the leg! Ethan Mars would call a DQ and stop HG before she did serious damage to Jim.</p><p>

(18)</p><p> </p><p>

Finally coming out to their seperate theme songs, Buffy Summers and Karin Kanzuki would each come out, Buffy on her own while Karin came out on a PONY of all things.</p><p>

(18)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Match 6: Buffy Summers vs Karin Kanzuki</strong></p><p>

The two martial arts-based female fighters had an incredible back and forth contest, but Karin's combination of thai boxing, judo, and akido overwhelmed Buffy's more straightforward kickboxing style. Buffy looked to resort to a Heart Punch but Karin countered with a series of clinching knees followed by a vicious judo throw called the Arakuma Inashi</p><p>

(36)</p><p> </p><p>

During an intermission, the XOF ring was replaced with a platform littered with platforms that, once the six competitors stood on it, was elevated ten feet in the air for the Super Smash Rules match: No DQs, anything goes, last fighter still on the platform is King of Crossover!</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>King of X-Over Deciding Match, Super Smash Rules: Eric Draven vs Sonic the Hedgehog vs Brock Lesnar vs Little Mac vs Earthworm Jim vs Karin Kanzuki</strong></p><p>

Still wounded from being shot by Hit Girl, Earthworm Jim would be the first elimination as Little Mac would quickly Star Punch him off the platform. Brock Lesnar would rampage for most of this match, suplexing all four of his remaining opponents, eliminating both Little Mac and Sonic The Hedgehog in the process. Lesnar continued to dominate, until Karin Kanzuki hit Lesnar in the knee with a baseball bat and Draven would spinkick Lesnar off the platform. It came down to Karin and Draven, the two seeming evenly matched but Karin's counter-throws gave her an edge. She picked up a Pokeball, looking to finish Draven off with style and out would come... a Magikarp. The Magikarp splashed helplessly and Draven grabbed a beamsword, slashing Karin with it, hitting her with Murder of Crows before throwing her off the platform for the win.</p><p>

FIRST KING OF X-OVER: ERIC DRAVEN</p><p>

(41)</p><p> </p><p>

Overall Grade: 40</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Next time on XOF:</strong></p><p>

Draven vs Kanzuki, one-on-one!</p><p>

Hit Girl vs Earthworm Jim, no DQ!</p><p>

Sonic The Hedgehog vs Taokaka!</p><p>

AND MORE~!</p>

[crayon]

<p>haha that damn Magikarp!</p><p> </p><p>

You're using Karin, so you get my vote <img alt="" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/smile.png.142cfa0a1cd2925c0463c1d00f499df2.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /></p><p> </p><p>

King of X-Over: Eric Draven© vs <strong>Karin Kanzuki</strong></p><p>

Shootout: <strong>Hit Girl</strong> vs Earthworm Jim</p><p>

Casey Jones and Little Mac vs <strong>Buffy Summers and Chell</strong></p><p>

Sonic The Hedgehog vs <strong>Taokaka </strong></p><p>

<strong>Brock Lesnar</strong> vs Marty McFly</p><p> </p><p>

TIEBREAKER: Someone bought a front row seat for XOF 2. Who is it? Best guess will be considered the tiebreaker. <strong>Michael Moore - No idea why!</strong></p>

[OctoberRaven]

<p>Sure why not. In fact, here's a full card for predictions:</p><p> </p><p>

King of X-Over: Eric Draven© vs Karin Kanzuki</p><p>

Shootout: Hit Girl vs Earthworm Jim</p><p>

Casey Jones and Little Mac vs Buffy Summers and Chell</p><p>

Sonic The Hedgehog vs Taokaka </p><p>

Brock Lesnar vs Marty McFly</p><p> </p><p>

TIEBREAKER: Someone bought a front row seat for XOF 2. Who is it? Best guess will be considered the tiebreaker.</p><p> </p><p>

Also, editor's note: I considered Lesnar winning it all but I opted to leave the winner blank in road agent notes. I am not disappointed in who the AI had win!</p>

[Peppermint Rage]

<p>King of X-Over: <strong>Eric Draven©</strong> vs Karin Kanzuki</p><p>

Shootout: <strong>Hit Girl</strong> vs Earthworm Jim</p><p>

<strong>Casey Jones and Little Mac</strong> vs Buffy Summers and Chell</p><p>

Sonic The Hedgehog vs <strong>Taokaka</strong></p><p>

<strong>Brock Lesnar</strong> vs Marty McFly</p>

[kanegan]

King of X-Over: Eric Draven© vs Karin Kanzuki

Shootout: Hit Girl vs Earthworm Jim

Casey Jones and Little Mac vs Buffy Summers and Chell

Sonic The Hedgehog vs Taokaka

Brock Lesnar vs Marty McFly

[EpicCorey]

<p>Why not I see alot of old EBD guys here so I got to vote.</p><p> </p><p>

King of X-Over: <strong>Eric Draven©</strong> vs Karin Kanzuki</p><p>

Shootout: Hit Girl vs <strong>Earthworm Jim</strong></p><p>

<strong>Casey Jones and Little Mac</strong> vs Buffy Summers and Chell</p><p>

<strong>Sonic The Hedgehog </strong>vs Taokaka (Sonic will be the future!) </p><p>

Brock Lesnar vs <strong>Marty McFly</strong></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>

Do you have any plans to post pics with the events?</p>

[OctoberRaven]

<p><strong>XOF 2</strong></p><p> </p><p>

We open again with Joey Styles and The Truth hyping up the show's card, with the main event being the final two of the Super Smash Rules match that decided the first King of X-Over. Styles wonders if the result will be different now that it's one on one in a traditional contest, while The Truth theorizes that the Magikarp that Karin summoned was actually a robot drone for Cipher, which Joey is not convinced of.</p><p>

(39)</p><p> </p><p>

Before his match, Brock Lesnar cuts a promo, not on Marty McFly, but on Eric Draven and Karin Kanzuki. Brock notes that it took the both of them to eliminate him and he wasn't knocked out, just knocked off the platform. Brock promises that whoever is King of X-Over will have a target on their back until Brock gets his shot at the title.</p><p>

(51)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Brock Lesnar vs Marty McFly</strong></p><p>

Not wanting to be an afterthought Marty tried to get early offense with a dropkick, but Lesnar only stumbled back a step. As soon as Marty got up, the man known as The Human Cheat Code would take Marty to SUPLEX CITY~! Eleven German Suplexes later, Brock would plant Marty with an F5, and instead of going for the cover, locked on the Kimura to break Marty's arm and score the submission win.</p><p>

(32)</p><p> </p><p>

We next went to a pre-taped interview with Taokaka and Joey Styles, Taokaka eating a bowl of ramen noodles. Styles asks how she is feeling after getting her arm snapped and Tao says she's fine and looking forward to making "Mus-kly Man" pay for it, but right now she's preparing to battle against "Speedy Guy", apparently reffeing to Sonic. The promo pans out to show that this is Taokaka's eighth ramen bowl!</p><p>

(28)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Sonic The Hedgehog vs Taokaka</strong></p><p>

Sonic would assume he had the speed advantage, but Tao had an advantage of her own: While Sonic had to accelerate or spin in place to get to high speeds, Tao darts around in the blink of an eye. The result, every time Sonic looked to utilize his legendary speed Tao would dash to knock him off balance and kill his momentum. Tao would leap on Sonic and claw at him (her claws are natural, thus legal), a technique that's cleverly named "I'm gonna beat the crap out of you!". Sonic was stunned by this flurry, allowing Tao to follow up with her finisher, "Meow Pow!" (Boma Ye) and get the three count.</p><p>

(23)</p><p> </p><p>

We went to another pre-tape, this one in Brooklyn, the shared home of Little Mac and Casey Jones. Mac wants to help Casey train for their tag team match. How does he do this? Mac rides a bike and makes Casey chase him of course! Mac calls this the training regimen that made him VWBA World Champion, Casey wonders why the pink sweats are necessary.</p><p>

(16)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Casey Jones and Little Mac vs Buffy Summers and Chell</strong></p><p>

This was a wild battle between four individuals lobbying for a shot at the King of X-Over, Casey and Mac had teamwork on their side, while Buffy had problems communicating with her mute ally. Chell however had her Portal Gun (which Cipher has yet to officially rule on) to help Buffy out of jams and set up for big offense as well. Buffy managed to use her supernatural reflexes to stuck a big hook from Mac and delivers a superkick, tagging out to Chell before wiping out Casey with a suicide dive and Chell hits the Portal Splash on Little Mac for the three count!</p><p>

(30)</p><p> </p><p>

We have a brief intermission, but when we come back, Joey Styles notes that the renegade doctor Herbert West is in the front row tonight! Joey wonders out loud if he has an ulterior motive. Truth says that maybe Herbert West is Cipher, which Joey instantly dismisses.</p><p>

(21)</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

SHOOTOUT: Earthworm Jim vs Hit Girl</strong></p><p>

The rules of a Shootout are simple: Guns are not only legal, but encouraged. Pinfall, submission, or incapacitation the ways to win.</p><p> </p><p>

Due to liability reasons invovled with bullets (both lead and plasma) flying around nearly a hundred bystanders, the Shootout was aired to the live crowd on a projector screen as they battle was filmed in a nearby warehouse where barricades of concrete and sandbags as well as kevlar-lined shipping containers formed a shooting ground where strategy was just as important as marksmanship. EWJ would try to hunt down Hit-Girl as she stuck to the shadows and cover, while HG took potshots at him. EWJ would manage to wound Hit Girl with a blast to the shoulder, but his plasma gun needed to recharge allowing HG to get away. EWJ went into the maze of containers and was blinded by a flashlight in his eyes. He fired at the light... but Hit-Girl wasn't there, she was above him, unloading with her dual glocks. EWJ was brought to a knee with his only saving grace being his super-suit, HG jumped on his back and applied her version of the Rear Naked Choke, the Kryptonite Special, and EWJ was choked out.</p><p>

(17)</p><p> </p><p>

Back in the arena, Karin Kanzuki was in the ring, microphone in hand. Karin claims it was luck, not ability, that allowed Eric Draven to defeat her last night. But Draven will have no excuses when she dissects him in this return match, and that once she becomes Queen of X-Over, she will happily take Draven as a subject. "I always wanted a pet crow. Oh ho ho ho!"</p><p>

(53)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>King of X-Over V1 Defense: Eric Draven © vs Karin Kanzuki</strong></p><p>

Despite her haughty confidence, Draven's superhuman speed and power managed to prove an equal match to Karin's skill and technical ability and we had a back and forth encounter. Karin was forced to resort to her akido throws to set up submissions but Draven was able to endure them all to get to the ropes. Arakuma Inashi was delivered but to Karin's shock Draven managed to kick out. After a moonsault also gets a two count Karin tries again for Arakuma Inashi, but Draven catches the second knee and counters with a dragon screw, Draven then delivered a vicious swinging neckbreaker followed up by Murder of Crows for the three count.</p><p>

(35)</p><p>

<strong>STILL KING OF X-OVER: ERIC DRAVEN (1st Defense)</strong></p><p> </p><p>

The show closes with Draven taking the title belt and heading to the back with little fanfare, pausing only to look at Herbet West as the doctor seemed to be writing something down on a pad and paper.</p><p> </p><p>

Overall: 35</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>XOF 3 Card:</strong></p><p>

King of X-Over: Eric Draven© vs Hit-Girl</p><p>

VIP Chooses Ruleset: Brock Lesnar vs Little Mac</p><p>

Taokaka and Sonic The Hedgehog vs Buffy Summers and Karin Kanzuki</p><p>

Chell vs Casey Jones</p><p>

Earthworm Jim vs Marty McFly</p><p> </p><p>

Tiebreaker1: Taokaka and Sonic will be having a friendly chili dog eating competition. Who wins?</p><p>

Tiebreaker2: How many TOTAL chili dogs will be eaten?</p><p> </p><p>

CRAYON! As you're 4/5 and actually voted in the tiebreaker, YOU WIN~! Your choices of rulesets will be PMed shortly!</p>

[OctoberRaven]

XOF 3

 

We open once more with Joey Styles and The Truth running down the card, noting that one lucky fan got to determine the rules for Brock Lesnar vs Little Mac. The Truth speculates that this "fan" is actually a demigod that created the 9000-verse as a sophisticated computer simulation program, which Joey Styles as always blows off as nonsense.

(38)

 

Earthworm Jim vs Marty McFly

The plucky youngster McFly managed to finally show us some offense tonight as Jim's frustration at not having a single legitimate fall to date made him make mistakes, McFly showing us a cruiserweight style. He looked for a flying swandive senton called "Back To The Future" but Jim rolled away and from then on The World's Strongest Annelid would dominate before polishing off McFly with an "Eat Dirt" Driver.

(20)

 

We now get to hear from Casey Jones, who takes issue with the fact that the Portal Gun is legal (actually not so much legal as not illegal, as Cipher has still yet to rule on it), but he's not allowed to use weapons of his own. Casey concludes that he'll just have to beat Chell without a weapon, before closing the promo by, for some reason, uttering "GOONGALA! GOONGALA!"

(22)

Casey Jones vs Chell

But it was easier said and done for the vigilante from New York as Chell's quick thinking and use of her Portal Gun made it tough going for Casey. But Casey's streetsmarts allow him to take control by using Chell's own portal tricks against her, even going through portals to deliver a brutal spear! Untrue to his word Casey would go for the cricket bat and Ethan Mars would stop him, Chell nearly getting the win with a rollup from behind. A bulldog from Chell was set to lead to the Portal Splash but Casey got a second wind, throwing Chell off the top rope and to the canvas. From there Casey climbed the top rope, once Chell got to her feet Casey Jones hit a diving forearm smash dubbed the Cross Check for a three count.

(24)

 

Next up is a pre-taped segment showing Taokaka and Sonic bonding over a chili dog eating competition. The two would have thirty seconds to eat as many chili dogs as possible. The two had a feeding frenzy but in the end Taokaka won 23 dogs to 22. Sonic was stuffed, but Taokaka kept eating...

(9)

Sonic The Hedgehog and Taokaka vs Buffy Summers and Karin Kanzuki

The two anthro speedsters seemed to be on the same page in this contest, utilizing each other's speed styles (Sonic's momentum-based, Tao's skittish bursts) to good effect. The same could not be said of Buffy and Karin who just could not get along well, likely due to Karin's ego and Buffy's taking-no-shit attitude towards it. This led to Karin opting to sit out the last minutes of the match drinking some tea by the timekeeper, and Buffy was hit with a Spin Charge tackle followed by the "Meow Pow!" for the win.

(30)

 

Joey Styles would now announce the rules of Brock Lesnar vs Little Mac and it is going to be MMA Rules! Three rounds of five minutes, knockout or submission the only ways to win!

 

MMA Rules: Brock Lesnar vs Little Mac

The bout started Lesnar going out and throwing bombs but Mac dodging the barrage and hitting some good combos. Lesnar managed to nail some good shots in the first round but Mac was the more effective overall striker, and Mac actually managed to nearly get the KO with a Star Punch but Lesnar was still able to defend himself as the bell rang with Mac trying to finish with a ground and pound. The second round, however, was all Lesnar. Lesnar just tackled Mac and tried to ground and pound himself but Mac was able to keep a closed guard to force a standup. Lesnar slammed Mac and got side control but the resillient Mac managed to spin out to escape. He tried another Star Punch but Lesnar dodged it and took Mac to SUPLEX CITY! Two German Suplexes and an F5 later and Ethan Mars called it 3:54 into the second round.

(36)

 

We'd hear from Hit Girl now who delivered a blisteringly vulgar promo that we cannot transcribe any part of in this review. The best we can do to sum it up is saying that anatomical mutilitation was promised and that HG said things about goths that will likely cause her to get a lifetime ban from Hot Topic.

(39)

King Of X-Over Title Match, v2 Defense: Eric Draven© vs Hit-Girl

It did not take long for this match to get violent as it spilled to the floor in the first minute and Hit Girl would use the apron to draw blood from the enigmatic champion. The brawl spilled out to the crowd and Cipher got the ears of Ethan Mars and Joey Styles, telling Ethan not to count either competitor out. Hit Girl threw Draven into rows of chairs and headed back in the ring, scowling at Draven's pet crow which flew overhead. HG pulled out a gun to shoot the crow... but at that moment Draven got back in the ring and shotgun dropkicked her! He went for a Death Valley Driver but HG got behind him and looked for the Kryptonite Special, Draven got to one knee and almost faded out but got a second wind, standing up and throwing her off! He hit the ropes, Murder of Crows! One, two, three!

WINNER AND STILL KING OF X-OVER: ERIC DRAVEN

(48)

 

Draven would watch as security would take Hit-Girl out of the arena before she caught her wits and her temper caused collateral damage, when Herbert West would jump the barricade, grab a mic and head into the ring. He told Draven that he wanted to work with Draven to test the champ's blood, as he believed it to be able to cure diseases and even revive the dead. He offered his hand to Draven... and Draven instead kneed him in the ribs and went to go for Murder of Crows... but Lesnar had come to ringside too, trips Draven and drags him outside... puts him on his shoulders... F5 ribs first into the ringpost! Brock wasn't done there... another F5 on the floor! Lesnar would look to the terrified West and simply grin as the show came to an end.

(32)

 

XOF 4 Card:

King of X-Over: Eric Draven© vs Brock Lesnar

Taokaka vs Karin Kanzuki

Chell and Marty McFly vs Earthworm Jim and Sonic The Hedgehog

Casey Jones vs Buffy Summers

Little Mac vs Hit-Girl

 

Tiebreaker: How many suplexes will Brock Lesnar hit during his match? (Hint: It can be anywhere from 5 to 30)

[crayon]

Really enjoying this, keep it up!

 

"I always wanted a pet crow. Oh ho ho ho!"

 

This led to Karin opting to sit out the last minutes of the match drinking some tea by the timekeeper

 

Karin is best girl

 

 

The Truth speculates that this "fan" is actually a demigod that created the 9000-verse as a sophisticated computer simulation program

 

lifetime ban from Hot Topic.

 

:D

 

XOF 4 Card:

King of X-Over: Eric Draven© vs Brock Lesnar

Taokaka vs Karin Kanzuki

Chell and Marty McFly vs Earthworm Jim and Sonic The Hedgehog

Casey Jones vs Buffy Summers

Little Mac vs Hit-Girl

 

Tiebreaker: How many suplexes will Brock Lesnar hit during his match? (Hint: It can be anywhere from 5 to 30) 28 SUPLEX CITY

[OctoberRaven]

XOF 4

 

As always Joey Styles and The Truth open the show hyping up the show, calling our main event the biggest bout in XOF's short history. Both men have yet to be pinned, and their only previous contest, Brock Lesnar was only defeated because it was a ring out ruleset instead of being incapacitated or forced to submit. The Truth theorizes that the two are both so dominant because they are in fact brothers, which Styles simply facepalms at.

(39)

 

Little Mac vs Hit Girl

Hit Girl was trained in boxing as well as other martial arts, but while HG is a student of boxing, Little Mac is a world champion boxer, so in straight up fighting Mac had the advantage and it showed. HG wouldn't give up so easily and come back with some high flying and dirty tactics, but she tried for a springboard attack and got clobbered with a Star Punch in mid-air for the three count.

(26)

 

We go to a pre-tape of Eric Draven preparing for his fight with Lesnar by beating down a nameless muscleman. Afterward he said that he refused to work with West because hee knows all about West's experiments, and after he takes out Lesnar, Herbert West is next on his hit list, warning that tonight is not a good day to be a bad guy.

(43)

 

Casey Jones vs Buffy Summers.

It's an East Coast vs West Coast battle as the New Yorker looked to battle the pride of Sunnydale CA Buffy Summers. It was a back and forth brawl with the two evenly matched, until Casey Jones grabbed his cricket bat and looked for Six Runs... but Buffy ducked it, and rolled Casey up to score a win for West Siiiidee.

(27)

 

We go back to a pre-tape of Earthworm Jim and Sonic hanging out before the show. The two platforming veterans made friendly jabs at each other before agreeing that whoever gains the fall between them should be the first to challenge Eric Draven for the title.

(35)

 

Chell and Marty McFly vs Earthworm Jim and Sonic The Hedgehog

Joey Styles notes that Marty asked for a tag team match to see how he'd fare in a team enviroment. Marty had trouble working out a plan with the mute Chell while his opponents had little problem working together. This would have been a gimme win for EWJ and Sonic... were it not for the still-legally-ambigous Portal Gun. Chell would use the Portal Gun to masterful effect to disrupt the strategy and timing of the duo, the big kicker being when Sonic attempted to hit Marty with a Sonic Elbow but Chell put a blue portal on the ground and an orange one in between Sonic and Marty. The result was Sonic flying out of control landing on his back hard on the canvas. Marty made some gestures to Chell which she interpreted correctly as setting up portals for an assisted Back To The Future swandive senton on Sonic for the upset win!

(24)

 

Karin Kanzuki had an interview now, calling Taokaka an "adorable little thing" and think she would make a good pet. Karin seemed to brush off Tao's win last night as irrelevant, as Buffy was a "third-rate peasant" while Karin was "combat royalty", before breaking out in a haughty laugh.

Taokaka vs Karin Kanzuki

But it was hard for Karin to adapt her gameplan to the erratic and unpredictable Taokaka, whose fake-outs and springboard attacks constantly had Karin reeling. Karin took a powder to the floor and Tao dived after her but Karin caught her with a big knee! Karin managed to turn the tables until she attempted Arakuma Inashi... Taokaka escaped the attack and then showed off one of her special techniques, "Almost Becoming Two!"... which allowed her to boost her speed to the point where it looked like there was actually a second Taokaka, and this lead Karin open to several darting tackles followed up with a Meow Pow! and a three count.

(35)

 

King of X-Over: Eric Draven © vs Brock Lesnar

Lesnar to many people's surprise came out with Herbert West as his second! The match itself began and the two went toe to toe in a vicious brawl until Lesnar got the upper hand, F5 just a minute in, one, two, Draven kicks out! Lesnar isn't done though, he takes Draven right to SUPLEX CITY~! after a barrage of ten German Suplexes Lesnar tried another pin but Draven kicked out again. Lesnar went for #11 but the champ landed on his feet, running lariat and Draven takes control, getting physical and even busting out an absolutely brutal sliding yakuza kick for a near fall. Draven looks for Murder of Crows but Lesnar catches him for MORE SUPLEXES~! All in all TWENTY SIX suplexes were thrown and Lesnar went for another F5 but Draven countered with a DDT! Cover, one, two, Lesnar kicks out! Draven went for a second Murder of Crows attempt but Lesnar caught him again... KIMURA! Draven's arm BROKE but Drraven refused to tap, making it to the ropes. Lesnar refused to let go however and Ethan Mars was forced to make it a DQ!

WINNER BY DQ BUT STILL KING OF X-OVER: ERIC DRAVEN

(60)

 

Lesnar was FURIOUS and grabbed Ethan, F5 to Ethan Mars! Herbert West would come in with a chair and give it to Lesnar who looked to deck Draven with it, but Draven ducked under the ropes! Lesnar followed and Draven superkicked the chair in the face of Lesnar. Draven grabbed a baseball bat and looked to brain Herbert West with it, but Lesnar recovered and the two brawled until security stepped in to break it up...

(27)

 

It took the entire team (and some of them with CATTLE PRODS) to seperate them, and Draven would get a microphone. He challenged Lesnar to a rematch: LAST MAN STANDING! If Lesnar wins, he gets the King of X-Over title... if Draven wins... he gets five minutes in the ring with Herbert West!

(56)

 

Overall: 52

 

XOF 5 CARD TO BE ANNOUNCED, BIG SHAZBOT COMING YO

[OctoberRaven]

<p><strong>XOF 5 will feature a TAG TEAM TOURNAMENT for the XOF Tag titles</strong></p><p>

Competing teams:</p><p>

Brooklyn Brawlers (Casey Jones and Little Mac)</p><p>

Freelance Police (Sam and Max) (Special Guests)</p><p>

Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass</p><p>

Rewop Lrig (Buffy Summers and Zatanna)</p><p>

Robot Masters (Bubble Man and Metal Man)</p><p>

Speed Run (Sonic The Hedgehog and Taokaka)</p><p>

Team Karin Kanzuki (Karin Kanzuki and Earthworm Jim)</p><p>

Team Quantum Physics (Chell and Marty McFly)</p><p> </p><p>

and of course there will still be a Last Man Standing match between Brock Lesnar and Eric Draven</p><p>

So, as it's a random draw tournament, here's how predictions will work:</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Which team wins the tournament</strong></p><p>

<strong>Which team is the runner up</strong></p><p>

<strong>Who wins Last Man Standing</strong></p><p>

Tiebreakers (in order of priority)</p><p>

<strong>Who hits their finisher first, Brock Lesnar or Eric Draven?</strong></p><p>

<strong>Will Herbert West get physically involved?</strong></p><p>

<strong>How many suplexes (10 to 50) will Lesnar throw?</strong></p>

[crayon]

Which team wins the tournament Team Karin Kanzuki!

Which team is the runner up Chell and Marty McFly

Who wins Last Man Standing Brock Lesner

 

Tiebreakers (in order of priority)

Who hits their finisher first, Brock Lesnar or Eric Draven? Brock Lesner F5 naturally!

Will Herbert West get physically involved? Hmm going with no

How many suplexes (10 to 50) will Lesnar throw? 45!

[OctoberRaven]

XOF 5

 

We start as always with Joey Styles and the Truth, Joey doing the drawings for the show with names in a hat (Truth says this is a sham and it was all done with a computer algoritm). Speed Run will face Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass, Rewop Lrig will face the Robot Masters, Team Karin Kanzuki will face Team Quantum Physics, and that leaves the Brooklyn Brawlers vs the Freelance Police.

 

Also, Joey Styles notes an edit from Cipher: To put the controversy with Chell's portal gun to bed, the company will now be allowing non-bladed weapons and non-lethal projectiles.

(41)

 

Speed Run vs Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass

Fans didn't seem to care for Hit-Girl's new partner, who used the new ruleset to his advantage fighting with dual batons while HG stuck with her hand to hand combat. However Speed Run has improved as a team since we left saw them, and Kick-Ass would eventually fall victim to "Meow Pow!" to end the bout.

(29)

 

Rewop Lrig vs Robot Masters

Bubble Man and Metal Man, being robots who are "brothers", should have had no issue competiting in a tag tournament... or so you'd think as Buffy's superhuman combat skills and Zatanna's use of magic proved to be a potent combo, and the match ended with Buffy hitting a superkick on Bubble Man for the three count.

(29)

 

After Rewop Lrig left the ring however, a mysterious figure in grey and red, with a red helmet with a black visor covering his face, entered the ring. He has a cannon on his arm and used it to blast a hole through Bubble Man! Metal Man tried to attack the figure, but ended up getting overwhelmed and hit with a back-to-belly piledriver for his efforts before getting blasted with the cannon too.

(21)

 

Team Karin Kanzuki vs Team Quantum Physics

EWJ didn't seem too happy having to deal with his egotistical partner trying to call all the shots but was willing to put up with it to earn some gold. Chell and Marty however had no issues working together, but Chell is still the ace of the team with her use of the portal gun giving her team some well-needed momentum. However Karin managed to knock Marty senseless with Arakuma Inashi forcing Chell to tag in, and Karin managed to use the portals against Chell to catch her off guard and delivering a vicious series of punches and palm strikes, the "Kanzuki-Ryu Shinbi Kaibyaku" combo, leading to a pinfall victory.

(33)

 

Brooklyn Brawlers vs Freelance Police

The two New York toughs were looking for a slugfest, Casey in particular wanting to use his hockey stick to crack some heads. However the Freelance Police's unorthodox double team style and technical wrestling were just too much for the Brawlers, eventually ending with Max using the "Lariat of Lagomorphic Lunacy" (A top rope lariat) on Casey Jones for the fall.

(56)

 

We go to a pre-tape of Eric Draven loading up weapons into a shopping cart for tonight's Last Man Standing match. Draven told Lesnar that it was a mistake for him to become Herbert West's lapdog, and that this would be the end of Lesnar. Draven acknowledges that he'd probably have to kill Lesnar to win the match, "but I have no problem with that".

(61)

 

Speed Run vs Rewop Lrig

This was a really fun and fast paced battle with everyone getting some high spots and big moves in, but in the end Zatanna managed to nully Tao and Sonic's speed with a "Nwod Wols" spell allowing Buffy to Heart Punch Sonic to head to the finals.

(47)

 

Team Karin Kanzuki vs Freelance Police

Sam and Max's years of teamwork gave them a strong start, but their unfamiliarity with the XOF's new ruleset caused them to nearly get DQed when Max pulled a massive revolver (from where we can't say, as he doesn't wear clothes). Jim used this to dropkick Max into Sam. The crime-solvin' pooch tried to deliver "Starfish Justice" (Running Powerbomb Backreaker) but Karin blind tagged in and after Starfish Justice was delivered Karin would hamer Sam with Kanzuki-Ryu Shinbi Kaibyaku to score the fall. She'd celebrate her win, without even checking on Jim to see if he was okay

(53)

 

We go to another pre-tape with Herbert West in his labratory with Brock Lesnar. West took Draven to task for impeding his scientific studies, nothing that he just wants to be able to allow people to live full productive lives without fear of them being cut short by senseless tragedy. "Yes, a few of my experiments have gone awry, but I am HELPING THE WORLD" West argues, while saying Draven's blood may be what he needs to perfect his serum. Lesnar OTOH didn't seem to care as long as he gets the XOF title. As we went to intermission.

(54)

 

XOF TAG TEAM TITLES: Rewop Lrig vs Team Karin Kanzuki

Before the bell, Karin ambushed Zatanna and sent her crashing headfirst into the floor and she and EWJ took turns putting the boots to Buffy. The damage EWJ took in his last encounter took a toll however and Buffy was able to make a comeback until Karin tagged in and took the advantage with a knee clip from behind to take over. Zatanna finally recovers and when Karin looked for the Kanzuki-Ryu Shinbi Kaibyaku Buffy cartwheeled away from it and dove... tag to Zatanna! Zatanna used "Erif Fo Esuoh" to clean house and take all the momentum from TKK, and a Shining Wizard left Karin reeling. Zatanna tags Buffy back in... SHE'S GOT A STAKE! Technically a stake doesn't have a blade so it's a legal weapon as she stabs Karin with it to get the three count!

WINNERS AND 1ST XOF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: BUFFY SUMMERS AND ZATANNA

 

XOF King of X-Over Last Man Standing: Eric Draven © vs Brock Lesnar (w/ Herbert West)

This fight got ugly and quick as Draven dove at Lesnar while he was making his way to the rring, Draven using his shopping cart of weapons to batter Lesnar but Lesnar was able to fight back through his sheer power. Lesnar ripped Draven's longcoat off him and STRANGLED Draven with it, before looking for an FS off the entrance stage, but Draven escaped and shoved him off instead. It wasn't much of a fall so Lesnar managed to recover and the two eventually made it back into the ring, but Draven caught Lesnar as he went through the ropes, MURDER OF CROWS! Draven saw Lesnar already getting up by 5 so he went to get a table, a ladder and a baseball bat. Draven beat Lesnar in the ribs with the bat and went to set up a table and the ladder. Looking for Murder of Crows... Lesnar catches him, hoists him on his shoulders, F5 through the table! Draven got up at 8, so Lesnar took him to SUPLEX CITY~! After THIRTY-THREE suplexes Lesnar watched Draven as he tried to get up... and makes the count at 9 1/2! Lesnar goes for a Kimura but Draven kneed him in the groin and delivered a neckbreaker.

 

Draven goes back to his shopping cart and... is that a GAS CAN? Lesnar recovered but Draven clocked him DIRECTLY ON THE HEAD with the gas can! Draven then starting pouring gas on Lesnar... he's going to set Lesnar on fire! He made a trail to the other side of the ring... Herbert West gets into the ring, he's got a syringe in hand and plunges it into Lesnar's neck! Draven spots West, Murder of Crows to West! He starts pouring gas on West too and is about to use a Zippo to light them up but Lesnar recovers, vicious lariat! Ethan Mars makes the count and Brock picks up the ladder looking to hit Draven with it if he gets up... but Draven's crow starts pecking at Lesnar!

 

Lesnar grabs Eric Draven's crow... AND EATS IT WHOLE!

 

Draven makes it to his feet barely but is wobbily, as if all the strength from him was just taken from him. Lesnar picks Draven up, and F5s him OVER THE ROPES, Draven's head HITTING THE APRON. Draven couldn't even MOVE and a ten count later Lesnar was standing tall!

 

WINNER AND 2nd KING OF X-OVER: BROCK LESNAR

(65)

 

XOF 6 Card

King of X-Over: Brock Lesnar © vs Taokaka

Karin Kanzuki vs Eric Draven

Tag Team Titles: Lrig Rewop vs Sonic The Hedgehog and Earthworm Jim

Hit-Girl vs Alice Liddell [From Alice in Wonderland]

Team Quantum Physics vs Brooklyn Brawlers

Kick-Ass vs ???

[OctoberRaven]

XOF 6

 

We open as always with Joey Styles and The Truth hyping up the show, with a new champion defending his title against his first ever opponent here in XOF. The Truth says that Brock Lesnar is actually Cipher, which Joey dismisses as insane.

(43)

 

We come to await Kick-Ass' opponent... and coming out to a very eerie whistling melody comes the grey and red mysery man from before, who we are being told is known as Break Man. Break Man enters the ring and Kick-Ass is clearly nervous, seeing as we first saw Break Man when he KILLED two robots.

(17)

 

Kick-Ass vs Break Man

And Kick-Ass was right to be nervous as Break Man completely dominated this bout, using some physical running strikes and high flying tactics, ending with Break Man hitting Kick-Ass with that back-to-belly piledriver called the Break Buster for the three count.

(15)

 

We go to a pre-tape with the Brooklyn Brawlers, where Casey Jones was now giving training tips in street fighting to Little Mac... by playing sports. Unfortunately, most sports like hockey and baseball and American football and bowling are... kind of tough to do in boxing gloves. Casey was a bit dissappointed, but praised Mac's hustle.

(24)

 

Team Quantum Physics vs Brooklyn Brawlers

The two duos produced a back and forth encounter with the physicality of the Brawlers clasing with the wits of TQP. Marty brought his hoverboard, "a REAL hoverboard, not those crappy ones that are really just Segways without handlebars" as Joey Styles put it, and tried to smack Little Mac over the head with it but hit Chell instead! Casey Jones used his cricket bat to knock him out with Six Runs to get a victory!

(34)

 

We now go to Hit-Girl who cuts a promo on Alice Liddell. We can't repeat any of what she says here, but suffice to say they aren't nice words, especially when it comes to Alice's fondness of rabbits.

(12)

 

Hit-Girl vs Alice Liddell

HG soon ate her words as she found out Alice Liddell (who came out to "White Rabbit" by Jefferson Airplane) was not just a prim and proper lady; her time in Wonderland turned her into a hardened fighting machine. She used a vicious combination of krav maga and jiu-jitsu to neutralize Hit-Girl's offense, before delivering a vicious axe kick called "Off With Your Head" for the pinfall.

(24)

 

We go to Sonic and Earthworm Jim now, who we found out are the chosen first challengers because Karin Kanzuki felt that the tag titles were beneath her. Sonic seemed fine with this and notes that Taokaka's okay with it too, and the two were enthusiastic as they looked to take the belts!

XOF Tag Team Titles: Rewop Lrig© vs Sonic The Hedgehog and Earthworm Jim

But the makeshift duo soon learned why the champs won out in the tournament. Buffy's athleticism and Zatanna's cleverness and use of magic proved to be as potent a combination as it did in the tournament, and while Sonic and EWJ were no strangers to working together the champs were just that much more in sync, and soon enough Zatanna would hit EWJ with her Shining Wizard, which we now know is to be called "Draziw Gninihs".

WINNER and STILL XOF Tag Champions: Buffy Summers and Zatanna

(45)

 

We now go to Karin Kanzuki, who said that it wasn't the tag titles that were beneath her, but teaming with "that disgusting" Earthworm Jim or having to face off with "that peasant" Buffy Summers again. She intends on defeating Draven to prove that she is in fact the superior fighter and once she does, the next stop will be becoming Queen of X-Over.

(56)

Karin Kanzuki vs Eric Draven

Draven seemed sluggish and weak in this contest, clearly still hurting from the Last Man Standing contest. Karin showed no mercy in putting the boots to the brooding warrior, but Draven still showed resilience and putting up a fight. Karin looked to finish with Arakuma Inashi but Draven escaped to use a superkick, but collapsed to his knees afterward. It took him a long time to get up to try for Murder of Crows, and it turned out to be too long as Karin reversed it with a judo throw, then hit Arakuma Inashi successfully to gain a three count in a surprisingly one-sided encounter.

(39)

 

And now we hear from Taokaka, who is fired up to have a chance to "beat up Muskly Man" and "take the shinymew". She also said "Speedy Blue Guy" told her that winning the title would mean she can buy all the food she wants! Suffice to say she was HYPE.

(40)

 

King of X-Over: Brock Lesnar© (w/ Herbert West) vs Taokaka

Brock Lesnar looked a lot bigger. And... greyer. And somehow even meaner looking than before. The match began a lot like their previous battle, Tao's speed getting an early advantage until Brock caught her and took her to SUPLEX CITY~! Brock went for the Kimura but Tao escaped it, saying "You won't get Tao this time Muskly Man!" to which Brock bellowed "I ARE BORK LASER" which... is just a little less coherent than we expect from Lesnar. Tao used "Almost Becoming Two" to issue a come back and even hit Meow Pow! but Lesnar kicked out! Tao went to lunge on Brock for "I'm gonna beat the crap out of you" but Lesnar flung her TEN FEET into the air to catch her for an F5, and then broke Tao's arm with the Kimura for good measure!

WINNER AND STILL KING OF X-OVER: BROCK LESNAR

(60)

 

We close with Draven, barely able to stand, finding Zatanna in the back. "I need your help... to stop Herbert West." The feed fades to black before we find out more. Dramatic!

(47)

XOF 7 CARD

King of X-Over: Brock Lesnar © vs Karin Kanzuki

Tag Team Titles: Rewop Lrig © vs Brooklyn Brawlers

Earthworm Jim vs Hit-Girl

Kick-Ass vs Alice Liddell

Team Quantum Physics vs Speed Run

Break Man vs Eric Draven

[crayon]

<p>hahaha oh sh*t it's BORK LASER</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>XOF 7 CARD</strong></p><p>

King of X-Over: <strong>Brock Lesnar ©</strong> vs Karin Kanzuki <em>dammit, sorry Queen Karin</em></p><p>

Tag Team Titles: <strong>Rewop Lrig ©</strong> vs Brooklyn Brawlers</p><p>

<strong>Earthworm Jim</strong> vs Hit-Girl</p><p>

Kick-Ass vs <strong>Alice Liddell</strong></p><p>

<strong>Team Quantum Physics</strong> vs Speed Run</p><p>

Break Man vs <strong>Eric Draven</strong></p>

[OctoberRaven]

<p><strong>XOF 7</strong></p><p> </p><p>

We begin as always with Joey Styles and The Truth hyping tonight's show, and noting that Karin Kanzuki and Brock Lesnar one on one is a first time ever match. Truth says that Brock Lesnar IS Karin Kanzuki, which just gets a long WTF stare.</p><p>

(42)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Break Man vs Eric Draven</strong></p><p>

Draven seemed to be still hurting from the fight with Brock Lesnar and Break Man showed him no quarter, absolutely dominating the fight. Eventually Zatanna appeared and got a mic. "Ti Eta Reven Ransel Fi Sa Efil Ot Kcab Worc S'nevard Gnirb!" was uttered and suddenly Draven's crow flew out of Zatanna's wand! Draven kipped up and took over the match, using a running knee lift to set up Murder of Crows for the three count.</p><p>

(36)</p><p> </p><p>

We go to Speed Run now as they talk about how they plan on getting back into tag team title contention. Taokaka seems a bit less thrilled to face "Silent Girl and 80s Guy" especially because "80s guy is my boyfriend-mew". Sonic does a table take. "Marty's your BOYFRIEND?!"</p><p>

(33)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Team Quantum Physics vs Speed Run</strong></p><p>

The action was fast and furious as the two most exciting teams in XOF did battle, and despite her previous misgivings Tao brought her A-Game to Chell and Marty. However Chell would counter a Meow Pow! by portalling Tao into Sonic (making Sonic tag in in the process) and Marty would dropkick Tao over the ropes as Chell hit the Portal Splash for the three count!</p><p>

(33)</p><p> </p><p>

We to go Herbert West who is working on one of his experiments while claiming that Karin Kanzuki has no chance against Brock Lesnar. Brock interjects: "I ARE BORK LASER." West replies that yes, he knows he's Brock Lesnar... "NO, BORK LASER." West, not wanting to be taken to Suplex City, relents and calls him BORK LASER for the rest of the interview, saying that BORK will take out Karin with ease.</p><p>

(41)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Kick-Ass vs Alice Liddell</strong></p><p>

The young vigilante was hoping to get his first win here and to avenge his teammate but the calculating Alice was able to neutralize Kick-Ass' batons with a croquet mallet, knocking him senseless with it before delivering Off With Your Head for the three count.</p><p>

(20)</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

Earthworm Jim vs Hit-Girl</strong></p><p>

An old rivalry was revived as Hit-Girl was looking to snap her losing streak. EWJ started off strong by HG's agility allowed her to avoid some of his more punishing offense. She grabbed a staff and clocked EWJ with it to bring him to a knee before running up and hitting him with her new finisher, "Robin's Revenge" (Step-up Hurricanrana Driver) for the three count.</p><p>

(25)</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

XOF Tag Titles: Rewop Lrig © vs Brooklyn Brawlers</strong></p><p>

Little Mac and Casey Jones brought their A-Game but the dynamic champs were able to match their physicality with teamwork and speed, not to mention Zatanna's magic. Little Mac nearly got the win by hitting the Star Punch on Zatanna but Zatanna rolled out to the floor. Mac brought her back in, throwing her to the ropes but she reversed, tag to Buffy who flew in, springboard stake stab! Cover, two, and Rewop Lrig retains!</p><p>

<strong>WINNERS AND STILL XOF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: BUFFY SUMMERS AND ZATANNA</strong></p><p>

(50)</p><p> </p><p>

We go Karin Kanzuki who was sipping some wine and watching her family's stock ticker. She calls Lesnar a "mindless oaf" whose muscles are no match for the "genius of the Kanzuki family", and that "lunatic mad doctor" wouldn't be able to guide Lesnar to victory, before concluding with a haughty laugh.</p><p>

(57)</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

KING OF X-OVER: BORK LASER© (w/ Herbert West) vs Karin Kanzuki</strong></p><p>

And Karin had right to be cocky as she was actually able to use her akido-based techniques on LASER at first. When she tried for an early Arakuma Inashi though, LASER just didn't go down for the throw and instead took Karin to SUPLEX CITY~! Karin did her best to come back, even going for Kanzuki-Ryu Shinbi Kaibyaku, but LASER kicked out! She was able to get to the ropes before BORK LASER gave her a Kimura but LASER just flung her onto her shoulders, F5! One, two, three.</p><p>

<strong>WINNER AND STILL KING OF X-OVER: BORK LASER</strong></p><p>

(64)</p><p> </p><p>

BORK LASER grabbed the title to celebrate but Eric Draven came running down the ramp with a BEAM SWORD and slashed BORK LASER with it twice. LASER was stunned and Draven looked for the kill but XOF security hit Draven with a cattle prod to stop him. West went to check on his charge as Draven was dragged away to end the show.</p><p>

(48)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>XOF 8 CARD:</strong></p><p>

Death Match for the King of X-Over Title: BORK LASER© vs Eric Draven</p><p>

Non-Title Match: Rewop Lrig vs Karin Kanzuki and Alice Liddell</p><p>

Kick-Ass vs Sonic The Hedgehog</p><p>

Valentine's Day Double Date Special: Marty McFly and Taokaka vs Little Mac and Chell</p><p>

Earthworm Jim vs Casey Jones</p><p>

Break Man vs Hit-Girl</p>

[crayon]

XOF 8 CARD:

Death Match for the King of X-Over Title: BORK LASER© vs Eric Draven

Non-Title Match: Rewop Lrig vs Karin Kanzuki and Alice Liddell

Kick-Ass vs Sonic The Hedgehog

Valentine's Day Double Date Special: Marty McFly and Taokaka vs Little Mac and Chell

Earthworm Jim vs Casey Jones

Break Man vs Hit-Girl

[OctoberRaven]

<p><strong>XOF 8</strong></p><p> </p><p>

Joey Styles and The Truth hype tonight's show, highlighting the Double Date Special where both members of the winning team not only get #1 contendership for the tag team titles, but a candlelight dinner at a five star restaurant. Truth says that dinner will actually have nanomachines designed to induce heart attacks in former members of a black ops unit, which Joey of course dismisses.</p><p>

(42)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Break Man vs Hit-Girl</strong></p><p>

Hit-Girl was looking to build some momentum over her big win at the last XOF event, and after weathering an initial flurry of offense from Break Man, managed to counter the Break Buster with a piledriver and followed it up with Robin's Revenge for the three count.</p><p>

(26)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Earthworm Jim vs Casey Jones</strong></p><p>

This was a good scrap between two physical competitors, but Casey Jones' dirty fighting and street smarts gave him the advantage, not to mention use of sports equipment. In the end EWJ tried to make Casey eat dirt, but Casey escaped, grabbed his cricket bat, and nailed Six Runs for the three count.</p><p> </p><p>

We now go to Marty McFly and Taokaka getting ready the Double Date match, Marty noting that while he and Chell are going to get a tag title shot no matter what happens, he wants to take Tao out on a night on the town. Tao is very happy, not just for the possible tag title shot or the fancy date, but "all that FREE FOOD meow!"</p><p>

(36)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Double Date Tag Match: Marty McFly and Taokaka vs Little Mac and Chell</strong></p><p>

One would think Marty and Chell would have avoided fighting each other and it'd mostly be Mac vs Tao, but it was in fact a very frantic tag encounter with all four comptitors giving it their all. Marty's hoverboard skills, Tao's frantic speed, Mac's fists and of course the Portal Gun all came into play to lead to a chaotic bout, but in the end Chell missed a Portal Splash on Taokaka, who tagged Marty in, and Marty would hit Back To The Future for the three count! Tao would celebrate by glomping "80s Guy" and hugging him. D'aww....</p><p>

(39)</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

Kick-Ass vs Sonic The Hedgehog</strong></p><p>

Kick-Ass was looking for his first win here in XOF and while he showed a lot of guts and resilience, he just couldn't answer the speed of the world's fastest hedgehog, and before you knew it the Sonic Elbow lead to the three count.</p><p>

(23)</p><p> </p><p>

We now go to Karin Kanzuki and Alice Liddell... well, mostly Karin who despite claiming to be happy to work with someone with "almost half as much class and nobility as myself", spent the match talking about how she was planning to get payback on that "foolish peasant" Buffy once and for all.</p><p>

(46)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Non-Title Match: Rewop Lrig vs Karin Kanzuki and Alice Liddell</strong></p><p>

While the tag champs had nothing much to lose tonight they still brought the fight to the two noble ladies, but Karin and Alice came in with a gameplan, sending Buffy to the floor and Karin got on the apron... SPIKE PILEDRIVER ON THE FLOOR TO BUFFY! Zatanna may be part of the JLA but she could only do so much against the martial arts of Karin and the gritty viciousness of Alice. Buffy managed to get back in it to help Zatanna, but the damage was done, Alice hit Off With Your Head, Karin tagged in to follow up with Kanzuki-Ryu Shinbi Kaibyaku for the three count.</p><p>

(41)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>KING OF X-OVER DEATH MATCH: BORK LASER© (w/ Herbert West) vs Eric Draven</strong></p><p>

When XOF means Death Match we MEAN Death Match. Anything goes, last competitor ALIVE wins. The result was an absolutely brutal encounter with the two brawling all over the arena. BORK LASER took Draven to SUPLEX CITY with an astonishing 51 SUPLEXES, broke Draven's arm with a Kimura, then threw him over the ropes with an F-5, but Draven got back up. The two brawled and ended up in the Eagle's Nest with a nervous Joey and a freaked out Truth, LASER F-5ed Draven off the Eagle's Nest but Draven was STILL alive. LASER did a SHOOTING STAR PRESS off the Eagle's Nest but Draven still lived.</p><p> </p><p>

BORK LASER looked for another F-5 but Draven escaped and the two brawled, ending up in the back. Draven got a beam sword and slashed LASER with it and hit Murder of Crows on concrete but that wasn't enough. He looked to finish off BORK LASER with the beam sword but LASER speared him and threw the sword away. LASER dragged Draven to the scaffolding access, and Joey Styles would note that Draven's crow, normally in the rafters, was nowhere to be seen.</p><p> </p><p>

In the scaffolding over the ring, BORK LASER looked for an F-5, but Draven again got free, and after a series of elbows hit Murder of Crows again. Draven's crow flew out from under the ring with a katana, and gave it to Draven. BORK LASER slowly got up...</p><p> </p><p>

And Draven DECAPITATES him! BORK's headless body falls to the ring as Herbert West watches in shock!</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

WINNER AND 3RD KING OF X-OVER: ERIC DRAVEN</strong></p><p>

(66)</p><p> </p><p>

Then... a flash of light in the ring... and suddenly Brock Lesnar was standing... wearing a long coat and having five wings on his back. Herbert West was terrified. "Oh no... he's become THE F5-WINGED ANGEL!" Lesnar grabbed West by the throat and instantly SNAPPED HIS NECK, pointing at Eric Draven. "The fight is not over Draven. Next time, we end this."</p><p>

(55)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>XOF OVA: THE F5-WINGED ANGEL</strong></p><p>

#1 Contendership Smash Rules Battle Royale</p><p>

XOF Tag Team Titles: Rewop Lrig© vs Speed Run vs Team Quantum Physics</p><p>

KING OF X-OVER, FINAL SHOWDOWN: Eric Draven© vs The F5 Winged Angel</p>

[OctoberRaven]

<p><strong>XOF OVA: THE F5-WINGED ANGEL</strong></p><p> </p><p>

We began with Joey Styles and The Truth hyping up this very special edition of XOF, where Eric Draven and the man formerly known as Brock Lesnar, now The F5-Winged Angel, will do battle one last time. The Truth says this is actually because Brock Lesnar is joining Street Fighting Championship, which Styles denies.</p><p>

(43)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Smash Rules Battle Royale</strong></p><p>

In addition to some of the usual suspects of XOF, we also had two special entrants: The zombified Herbert West (apparently he injected himself with re-animation serum), and a member of the Foot Clan. Break Man would immediately take out the Foot Clan ninja only to be sent over by Alice Liddell. Hit-Girl and Kick-Ass would try to team up but the Brooklyn Brawlers would team to take them both out, only for Little Mac to Star Punch Casey Jones out of the match while Karin Kanzuki sends Alice packing with a flurry of blows with a paper fan and a Mr. Saturn. Little Mac and Earthworm Jim would battle on the edge and Mac used his Star Punch, sending Jim over but Mac landed too close to the edge, lost balance, and fell too. Karin Kanzuki posed for the win but forgot about Zombie Herbert West...</p><p> </p><p>

...Who had a Pokeball... and inside was...</p><p> </p><p>

VOLTORB...</p><p> </p><p>

Which blew up in West's face, knocking him out of the ring.</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>NEW #1 CONTENDER: KARIN KANZUKI!</strong></p><p>

(31)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>Tag Team Titles: Rewop Lrig© vs Speed Run vs Team Quantum Physics</strong></p><p>

The action was as chaotic as one would expect as all six competitors did their best to be the the first ones to gain a fall. And to make it interesting Cipher had made this tornado rules halfway through. The finish came when Taokaka went for Meow Pow! on Zatanna and Buffy, then to Chell but a quick use of the Portal Gun made her knee Sonic instead! Chell then dropkicked Tao out of the ring and Marty McFly got on the top rope, Back To The Future on Sonic! One, two, three!</p><p>

<strong>WINNERS AND THE 2ND XOF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: MARTY MCFLY AND CHELL!</strong></p><p>

(42)</p><p> </p><p>

The F5 Winged Angel now appeared and addressed the crowd. He says tonight is the end, not just of Eric Draven, but the world. He claims that once he destroys Draven, he will go on to kill everyone else too. "I will rule over a dead world..."</p><p>

(52)</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

THE FINAL SHOWDOWN, KING OF X-OVER: Eric Draven© vs The F5-Winged Angel</strong></p><p> </p><p>

Draven and Angel had one of their typical knock down drag out wars in the ring, with The F5-Winged Angel going for SUPLEX CITY~! hitting TWO HUNDRED AND FOUR GERMAN SUPLEXES but Draven refused to give up, fighting back and using his sliding Yakuza Kick to send Lesnar THROUGH THE ROPES. Draven grabbed his sword and followed The F5-Winged Angel, who drew his own sword and the two did battle going not just out of ringside but to the streets of the city.</p><p> </p><p>

The Angel drew blood first,nearly cleaving Draven in half with his sword. He then hit an F5 onto a car but Draven got back up. Angel then picked up Draven and F5d him ACROSS THE STREET. But Draven stayed up.</p><p> </p><p>

The F5 Winged Angel threw a CAR at Draven but Draven dodged it, his crow dropping him a molotov as he ran to The F5 Winged Angel, lighting him up with the molotov cocktail and then hitting Murder of Crows! Draven saw Angel getting up, another Murder of Crows, but it wasn't enough to stop the F5 Winged Angel. </p><p> </p><p>

Draven hoisted the Angel up for an F5 of his own but the F5 Winged Angel RIPPED DRAVEN'S ARM OFF, using the arm like a baseball bat and knocking Draven into a skyscraper. The Angel ran after him and leapt into the air, catching him for a 10 story F5!</p><p> </p><p>

Ethan Mars was ready to call it... but Draven crawled out of the crater made by this F5. The Crow dropped another item into Draven's hand as the F5 Winged Angel watched.</p><p> </p><p>

"You cannot fight forever, Draven." The Angel said. "Don't forget..."</p><p> </p><p>

He lept into the air, catching the crow in one hand.</p><p> </p><p>

"I know your weakness." And then he CRUSHED the crow. </p><p> </p><p>

Draven dropped to all... well, threes. </p><p> </p><p>

"Don't give up, Draven! You can do this!" Marty McFly said, watching from above the arena.</p><p>

Sonic chimed in, "Yeah kid, you're our only hope but we know you can do it!"</p><p>

"Yeah Spooky Guy! Take out Muskly Man!"</p><p>

[Hit-Girl's comments to vulgar to post]</p><p>

Everyone was watching, all of them (except Chell cause, you know, mute) cheering Draven on.</p><p> </p><p>

Draven stood up and looked in his hands... a pair of sunglasses. He smiled.</p><p> </p><p>

"What are you smiling about, Draven? You are doomed. Everyone is doomed."</p><p> </p><p>

Draven: "No I'm not. I'm going to go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb. JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM?!"</p><p> </p><p>

Draven put on the shades as The F5 Winged Angel leapt at him for the kill...</p><p> </p><p>

Draven caught him in mid-air with a Yakuza Kick! F5 Winged Angel flew into the air...</p><p> </p><p>

50-FEET MURDER OF THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP!</p><p> </p><p>

The dust cleared... and Draven was the only one standing.</p><p>

</p><p><strong>

WINNER AND STILL KING OF X-OVER: ERIC DRAVEN</strong></p><p>

(44. 60 minutes was too long it seems)</p><p> </p><p>

A flash of light... and the F-5 Winged Angel stood back up.</p><p>

"No... if I cannot rule over a dead world... then I still DESTROY THE UNIVERSE."</p><p> </p><p>

He used his dark magic to prepare for his Universe Destroying Limit Break...</p><p> </p><p>

But DR. WILY showed up in his UFO, and it has an XOF logo on it!</p><p> </p><p>

Dr. Wily must have been Cipher!</p><p> </p><p>

Wily gets out a megaphone saying that he will not allow the F-5 Angel to win. He has a super ray that can destroy the F5 Winged Angel... however "there's a 99.31 percent chance that it will also destroy the universe too."</p><p> </p><p>

Wily pressed the big red button...</p><p> </p><p>

(40)</p><p> </p><p>

<strong>DID DR WILY DESTROY THE UNIVERSE TO STOP BROCK LESNAR FROM DESTROYING THE UNIVERSE?</strong></p><p><strong> </strong></p><p><strong>

OR DID SOMETHING ELSE HAPPEN?</strong></p><p><strong> </strong></p><p><strong>

END OF SEASON ONE.</strong></p>

[crayon]

ahahaha OH. MY. GAWD.

 

I had to read the last entries back to back, and after the first one I was all ready to declare this the most epic series of battles with Team Karin Kanzuki vs Rewop Lrig and Bork Lazer vs Eric Draven, but then MURDER OF THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP?????

 

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WUT