$4 Wrestling - You Get What You Pay For [CVerse]

Questlove · June 27, 2020

"There's no way you could do that, Frank."

Those words were all it took for Honest Frank to decide he wanted to change wrestling history. Fresh from a minor lottery win which netted him a cool $25,000, Frank went to the nearest bar to celebrate with his buddies. What began as a party turned somewhat sour, however, as the more whiskey he consumed, the more bitter he became about his place in the wrestling industry. Honest Frank is a prideful man, one who feels he has more to give than his colleagues could ever know. A man with ideas. Ideas that deserve to be heard! When he drunkenly insisted that he's so smart he could turn even the worst wrestlers in the world into stars, his friends scoffed.

"There's no way you could do that, Frank."

Damn near blackout drunk at this point, Frank took the words from his friends as a challenge and slinked off to make some calls. While keeping a steady flow of alcohol running through his veins, he spent the rest of the night calling or texting just about every contact he had in the business and had come up with the promotion and the list of guys who would be involved in it. Exhausted, he finally collapsed on his couch. Awaking the next morning with his head pounding and the mission statement of his new promotion hastily scribbled out in front of him, he recalled the events of the previous night with astonishment - he had already filed to create the company, he had already spoken to and promised to fly a dozen workers across the world and turn them into stars. How the hell did he get so much work done in such a short amount of time? That doesn't matter anymore. He was terrified, excited, thrilled and he felt more alive than he had in years. Time to put your money where your mouth is, Frank.

RULE 1: Nobody on the starting roster above 45 in any Primary skills, Psychology, Microphone, Charisma or Acting.

RULE 2: We only hire newgens from then on.

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Questlove · June 27, 2020

ANNIHILUS

Home: Lahti, Finland

Height: 7'0"

Weight: 394lbs

Finisher: Choke Grip

Theme:

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BIG HARV

Home: Perth, Australia

Height: 6'7"

Weight: 321lbs

Finisher: Choke Bomb

Theme:

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BORIS KIRIYAKIN

Home: Moscow, Russia

Height: 6'6"

Weight: 328lbs

Finisher: Soviet Piledriver

Theme:

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DEAD MAN WALKEN

Home: Boston, Massachusetts

Height: 6'3"

Weight: 244lbs

Finisher: Stunner

Theme:

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JAKE D'ANGELO

Home: Sydney, Australia

Height: 6'0"

Weight: 215lbs

Finisher: Moonsault

Theme:

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JAKUB KRAWCZYK

Home: Warsaw, Poland

Height: 6'8"

Weight: 405lbs

Finisher: Mighty Side Suplex

Theme:

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JANUS

Home: Sydney, Australia

Height: 6'6"

Weight: 275lbs

Finisher: Face-Off

Theme:

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LUCA SACRAMONI

Home: Naples, Italy

Height: 6'6"

Weight: 346lbs

Finisher: Leg Drop

Theme:

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JEFF AMAZON

Home: Bristol, England

Height: 6'2"

Weight: 233lbs

Finisher: Amazon Prime

Theme:

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MEAN STREETS MOHAN

Home: Delhi, India

Height: 5'10"

Weight: 192lbs

Finisher: Flying Elbow

Theme:

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RAHUL THE ROGUE

Home: Delhi, India

Height: 5'6"

Weight: 150lbs

Finisher: The Grift

Theme:

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SULPHUR

Home: Hell Itself

Height: 6'10"

Weight: 370lbs

Finisher: Depths of Hell

Theme:

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TWO-FACE TUCKER

Home: Brisbane, Australia

Height: 6'4"

Weight: 256lbs

Finisher: Coin Toss

Theme:

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VITO PIRELLI

Home: New York, New York

Height: 6'7"

Weight: 335lbs

Finisher: V-Bomb

Theme:

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HONEST FRANK

Home: Yonkers, New York

Role: Owner, CEO, Colour

Theme:

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MARTIN THEOCOTT

Home: Detroit, Michigan

Role: Announcer

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WHISTLER

Home: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Role: Producer, Colour

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GREGORY CHAPMAN

Home: Vancouver, Canada

Role: Referee

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DELHI DYNAMOS

Mean Streets Mohan

Rahul the Rogue

Finisher: Kol-Cutter

Theme:

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ITALIAN AMERICANS

Luca Sacramoni

Vito Pirelli

Finisher: Sicilian Slice

Theme:

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Big Roguey · June 27, 2020

Graphics looking swiiiiish Questlove. Sulphur ultras here to stan our man to victoryyyyy.

Historian · June 27, 2020

Graphics look great. Very slick looking.

Dalton · June 28, 2020

This is already awesome!

Eyreo · June 28, 2020

I love the style of your graphics. I can't wait to see what you do!

Sons of Kohral · June 28, 2020

Damn it, this is such a great idea.

Questlove · June 28, 2020

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$4 Wrestling #1

January 5, 2020

Location: Indianapolis, Indiana

Attendance: 65

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Honest Frank opens up the show with microphone in hand, welcoming the people to ground zero of a new phenomenon, $4 Wrestling! He extends an invitation to all the troublemakers, the excessively violent, the broken toys who nobody else wants to play with to come to $4 Wrestling and prove themselves against the like-minded and make themselves famous.

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In a match that would have sent any wrestling purist reaching for the alcohol, Big Harv defeated Jakub Krawczyk in 4:41 with a Choke Bomb.

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Jake D'Angelo defeated the comically incompetent Jeff Amazon in 5:55 with a Moonsault.

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In a very even and hard-hitting contest that resembled a bar fight more than a wrestling match, the experience of Two-Face Tucker was no match for the reckless abandon of Dead Man Walken as Walken defeated Tucker in 7:07 after landing the Stunner.

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After the match, Honest Frank hopped in the ring to get the words of the victorious Dead Man Walken, who says that it seems $4 Wrestling is the land of the giants, and if so he's here to cut them all down to size!

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Janus made it look easy against Boris Kiriyakin, felling him in 5:51 with the Face-Off.

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The Italian Americans staked their claim as the premier team in $4W, picking up the win over The Delhi Dynamos when Vito Pirelli pinned Rahul the Rogue in 11:21 after the Sicilian Slice.

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In a terrible slugfest, Annihilus asserted his dominance over a fellow monster when he defeated Sulphur in 5:03 with the Choke Grip.

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As Annihilus stood over the fallen Sulphur, Janus made his way out to the ring and what began as a confrontation quickly turned into a colossal brawl, with the two behemoths still fighting as the show ended.

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Show Rating

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TLLK · June 28, 2020

Two 0s. My God.

I love this.

HiPlus · June 28, 2020

Two Face Tucker, Jake Deangelo, Sulphur, Annihilus, and Big Harv. You have my interest and entrance music for them all. Alice in Chains!

Blake Trask · June 28, 2020

It was terrifying on discord and it's terrifying now!

Also be careful the feds don't come down on you for illegally importing that stoat smuggler Amazon.

Neoteros · June 28, 2020

I think several of my brain cells just doused themselves in gasoline and set themselves on fire, but I don't care. This is great. <img alt="

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MisterRomanini · June 28, 2020

This is the ultimate travesty of this great sport called professional wrestling.

I love it.

DarK_RaideR · June 28, 2020

This seems to be the diary that will fill the void in my world since the Oddworld went on hiatus. You are too good for this planet, Questlove.

Questlove · June 28, 2020

Thank you all for your kind words! The passion of the $4 Wrestling fans is truly unprecedented. We're going all the way to the top, folks.

Some of you will know that this started on the GDS Discord and I already posted a few shows in there, so I haven't done predictions straight away for that reason. I'm going to be posting up shows fairly quickly until we get up to date, probably in more detail as I go along and I'll also most likely be experimenting with the show layout a bit, so if anybody has suggestions to make it easier to read, lemme know.

dstephe4 · June 28, 2020

I like this. Nice gradients behind your text boxes. Html?

This diary seems to me like a cross between Bigelow Cartwheel's magnificent Oddsworld Wrestling (in that the talent is so woeful it's delightfully entertaining) and my Great British Wrestling (also started on a drunken bet by someone who's in wsy over their head).

Really looking forward to reading more of this. I've never seen a 0 rated match before. Having 2 of them on one show is an achievement of epic proportions. I am genuinely impressed. $4 for tickets seems a little expensive though. $2 Wrestling is the way forward lol

Questlove · June 28, 2020

$4 Wrestling #2

February 2, 2020

Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Attendance: 86

Boris Kiriyakin vs. Jakub Krawczyk

The fans weren’t into this one. Not sure why. What’s not to like about two enormous Europeans smashing each other with forearms for 3 minutes? Jakub looked really good here for a near 50 year old with exploding knees. The finish came after Boris put Krawczyk in his signature Bear Hug, before being backed up against the ropes, causing both men to tumble out of the ring comically. They then brawled wildly on the outside before they both got counted out.

MATCH RESULT: Draw after Double Count Out at 4:47

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After the match, both men were inseparable as they fought all the way around ringside and to the back. An old lady in the front row hit them both with her handbag on the way past.

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Two-Face Tucker vs. Big Harv

These two really pulled out all the stops here to show me why I’m paying the big bucks to fly them in from Australia. Tucker’s character is that he’s an overly positive creepy bastard who likes to collect coins. Every time Harv slammed him to the mat, a few coins would fly out of Tucker’s pockets. Big Harv’s character is just that he’s big, so he was very much the straight man in this dynamic. Harv left Tucker laying with a Choke Bomb to pick up the win.

MATCH RESULT: Big Harv wins via pinfall with the Choke Bomb in 2:57

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Dead Man Walken vs. Jake D’Angelo

These two are pretty small by our standards, but their styles mix well - D’Angelo is a feisty brawler who loves to cheat and Walken throws himself around like he’s got a death wish. That kid’s got potential. Walken got sick of D’Angelo’s antics and went into a rage before putting him away with the Stunner.

MATCH RESULT: Dead Man Walken wins via pinfall with the Stunner in 8:20

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As Walken makes his way to the back, Boris Kiriyakin and Jakub Krawczyk come through the curtain, still continuing their brawl from earlier. That old lady in the front row is not impressed with this turn of events and begins hooting and hollering. They fight across the stage and back again before disappearing to the back as quickly as they appeared.

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Annihilus vs. Janus

These are my two favourites of an… admittedly pretty rough bunch. Straight from the bell these two are on each other like USPW on an indie sensation, hammering away with lefts and rights. This is great, but the fans still don’t really care. We’ll get them in the end. Janus tries to lift Annihilus for a scoop slam, and that’s a big mistake. His back gives way and he is crushed under the mighty Finn, who locks in the Choke Grip and forces Janus to pass out.

MATCH RESULT: Annihilus wins via submission with the Choke Grip in 5:57

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I’m straight in the ring after the match to try and get a word with Annihilus, but he just stares a hole through me, snatches the mic from me and crushes it with his bare hands. I am in awe at the strength of this man. He then leaves the ring and destroys a table for good measure. Now that’s commitment.

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Before the next match can even begin, Boris Kiriyakin and Jakub Krawczyk are out brawling yet again. Is there no security around here? The answer is no.

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Mean Streets Mohan vs. Jeff Amazon

These guys are both pretty funny so felt like a natural fit for the comedy match before the big main event. I’ve been told Jeff Amazon has had some legal troubles in the past, but I’m sure that’s all blown over now. Mohan looked to have this one in the bag until Amazon hit a low blow behind the ref’s back, leading to Amazon Prime (what he calls a Flatliner) for the win.

MATCH RESULT: Jeff Amazon wins via pinfall with Amazon Prime in 5:35

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Luca Sacramoni vs. Vito Pirelli

We haven’t actually got a tag team division here, even though these two are aligned. You can sense the love in the air between these two as they are very hesitant to fight. Either that, or they were winded after their entrances. Once they got going they had a very respectable hoss fight, apart from Luca dropping Vito on his head at one point when going for a Powerslam. Thankfully that wasn’t stopping Vito as he managed to hoist up his very out of shape partner for a Sit-Out Powerbomb to get the win.

MATCH RESULT: Vito Pirelli wins via pinfall with the V-Bomb in 7:20

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There appears to be some tension between the two after the match, but before anything can happen, Boris Kiriyakin and Jakub Krawczyk are out continuing their brawl on the stage yet again. That fiery Italian blood of Vito and Luca compels them to head out the ring and join in the fight, but then…

Annihilus bursts through the curtain with a chair and attacks all four men, clearly not content to be left out of the action. After repeatedly blasting them all one by one, he singles out Vito Pirelli who tries to fight back and throws him off the stage like a sack of potatoes!

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Show Rating

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Portlius · June 29, 2020

I can see $4 wrestling having some unique challenges:

1) an open invitational match where someone from the crowd could actually win

2) a challenge to be the first wrestler to be poached by a bigger company

3) a mission to not be the bottom ranked promotion in the world.

Great to see Boris showing his legendary skills outside Europe

dstephe4 · June 29, 2020

I say the first wrestlers to get a match rating over 40 should get a $40 bonus each.

DarK_RaideR · June 29, 2020

Vito Pirelli wins via pinfall with the V-Bomb

Given what "the F bomb" stands for and Vito being of Italian ancestry, I like to picture him screaming VAFANCUUUUULOOOOO as part of the theatrics involved with the execution.

foolinc · June 29, 2020

I love this terrible idea!

Also, really like the idea of using gradients to spice up the match results (being the action in the ring isn't going to be doing it any time soon).

TLLK · June 29, 2020

the brawl that never would end had me rolling

Nightshadeex · June 29, 2020

For the love of El Patron, what is the product?!

Questlove · July 2, 2020

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$4 Wrestling #3

March 8, 2020

Location: Cleveland, Ohio

Attendance: 82

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Getting the show off to a hot start, I come out to remind everybody why they’re here - tonight’s main event is a five-way slobberknocker with Annihilus, Vito Pirelli, Luca Sacramoni, Boris Kiriyakin and Jakub Krawczyk. The winner of that will face the winner of Dead Man Walken vs. Big Harv in the main event of our next show to become the first ever $4W Champion. Most people were disinterested, but there was a man in the front row who seemed thrilled by this news.

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Janus vs. Jeff Amazon

Jeff Amazon came out to the ring throwing strange weasel-looking stuffies into the crowd, but during the match he was the one getting thrown around as Janus absolutely obliterated him and pinned him with Face-Off.

MATCH RESULT: Janus wins via pinfall with the Face-Off in 2:48

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/08.jpg

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<img alt="6GzZTC1.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/6GzZTC1.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="9t9wD3m.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/9t9wD3m.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="wvB5Uzi.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/wvB5Uzi.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Big Harv vs. Dead Man Walken

Big Harv’s mobility tonight was really something to behold. Watching him walk to the ring was like watching a baby walk for the first time. Mercifully for him, that was pretty much the extent of his motion as the majority of this match was Dead Man Walken recklessly throwing himself at the big Australian repeatedly in an attempt to knock him off his feet. Harv was having none of it and a cursory glance at him tells me this is probably the longest he’s spent standing up in years. After being unable to do it while standing, Walken finally landed a Stunner from the second rope to put the big man down for the 3 and advance to next month’s championship match.

MATCH RESULT: Dead Man Walken wins via pinfall with a middle-rope Stunner in 6:24

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/10.jpg

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<img alt="ae6SDq7.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/ae6SDq7.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="aegAZeC.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/aegAZeC.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="9t9wD3m.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/9t9wD3m.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="z9TRRlB.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/z9TRRlB.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="mxI4YpG.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/mxI4YpG.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Two-Face Tucker & Sulphur vs. The Delhi Dynamos

In another serious mismatch of sizes, the minuscule Mohan & Rahul came up against the titanic Sulphur and the completely normal-sized Two-Face Tucker. This was your classic underdog story with the smaller men trying to use their speed to their advantage but inevitably getting tossed around like ragdolls. The people are surprisingly into Mohan and Rahul and one guy in the crowd even lets out a cheer when the unthinkable happens and Mohan rolls up Two-Face Tucker for the win.

MATCH RESULT: The Delhi Dynamos win via pinfall when Mean Streets Mohan rolls up Two-Face Tucker in 5:53

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/08.jpg

</div>

<img alt="z9TRRlB.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/z9TRRlB.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="mxI4YpG.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/mxI4YpG.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

While Rahul is in complete shock, Mohan runs around ringside like a madman and celebrates as though he just won $100. When he runs up the ramp, however…

<img alt="wwthprJ.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/wwthprJ.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

...he is met by Annihilus, who grabs him and throws him off the stage like a lawn dart, as though he were nothing but an insignificant speck. Rahul watches in horror and then flees as Annihilus marches to the ring.

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/27.jpg

</div>

<img alt="wwthprJ.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/wwthprJ.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="9t9wD3m.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/9t9wD3m.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="54FSCX6.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/54FSCX6.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="9t9wD3m.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/9t9wD3m.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="eMF1koy.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/eMF1koy.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

<img alt="9t9wD3m.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/9t9wD3m.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="rj4k0BT.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/rj4k0BT.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="9t9wD3m.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/9t9wD3m.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="hKTQstk.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/hKTQstk.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Annihilus vs. Vito Pirelli vs. Luca Sacramoni vs. Jakub Krawczyk vs. Boris Kiriyakin

This was about as crazy a brawl as you can get. Five big, beefy men pounding away on each other for the better part of 10 minutes. It’s times like these that I know $4W are going all the way to the top, because it doesn’t get much better than this. That being said, this was much more of a triple threat as Kiriyakin and Krawczyk quickly targeted each other and began fighting around ringside, so the others decided to leave them to it. While Vito and Luca were prepared to team up to halt the threat of Annihilus, they were by no means taking it easy on each other either and in the end that was their downfall as Annihilus blasted them both with a shoulder tackle while they were busy brawling. At that moment, Boris Kiriyakin, who had finally managed to fend off Krawczyk at ringside, made his way back in the ring for the first time in a good 7 minutes only to immediately be trapped and passed out in Annihilus’ Choke Grip.

MATCH RESULT: Annihilus wins via submission after forcing Boris Kiriyakin to pass out in the Choke Grip in 8:32

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/10.jpg

</div>

<img alt="wwthprJ.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/wwthprJ.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="wvB5Uzi.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/wvB5Uzi.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

As Annihilus huffs and puffs as the last man standing, Dead Man Walken makes the questionable decision to head to the ring and confront him ahead of their title match. Predictably, he is made to regret this as Annihilus grabs him by the throat and Chokeslams him over the top rope onto the concrete floor below.

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/25.jpg

</div></div>

Show Rating

http://homeofprowrestling.com/MyTEWDiarys/Show%20Grades/13.jpg

</div></div>

Questlove · July 2, 2020

<div style="text-align:center;"><img alt="Juc0Kja.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Juc0Kja.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /></div> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Nightshadeex" data-cite="Nightshadeex" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="51015" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>For the love of El Patron, what is the product?!</div></blockquote> Monster Battle, the only product that does this justice.

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