Lucha Underground: Alternate Reality, Honestly [C-VERSE]

1PWfan · January 16, 2021

This is a fun read, and you do a great job of capturing that LU feel without making it a straight copy of the actual show.

falling_star · January 17, 2021

<div style="text-align:center;"><img alt="fLXXJsi.png?2" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/fLXXJsi.png?2" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> The Aztec rabbit appears on screen before rhythmically pulsing a few times, then exploding and burning away to a black screen. A white bunny hops into frame near the top of the screen, then continues to hop forward, getting closer and closer to the screen as if it were traveling along a path from the farthest reaches of the back of the screen towards the front. When its face fills the screen, it stops for a moment and sits there, lifeless look in its eyes as its nose & whiskers twitch. "We've followed the little... white... rabbit," a breathy voice says before breaking out into a riotous cackle; no one is on screen, just a very close-up view of the stoic rabbit’s little head. "We're almost heeeereeeee!!" another oddball voice exclaims, the first one still laughing madly. "Now, now, there's no need to be so serious!" a third voice orders the first two; the laughter stops and the screen goes completely black once again. Suddenly, a new, unsettling, psychotic laughter begins, soon joined by the original laughing voice and then the oddball laughter of the second voice we heard. The laughter continues for an uncomfortable amount of time before it ceases, and the Aztec rabbit appears on screen once again. "We're coming to the Temple, coming to the Temple, coming to the Temple..." the three voices begin to chant in singsong, the Aztec rabbit twitching and shaking in-time with the voices for a moment before the screen fades to black once again. THE RABBIT TRIBE COMING SOON TO LUCHA UNDERGROUND</div> =============== Thanks for all the kind words everybody, I'm having a lot of fun with this and should have episode 4 up tonight or tomorrow since I'm on a three-day weekend! <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Jaysin" data-cite="Jaysin" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="52462" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>That rabbit tribe is interesting. Definitely excited to see who gets brought in</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Dalton" data-cite="Dalton" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="52462" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>I'm in love. I am so fascinated to see where this goes. Props to you</div></blockquote> <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="1PWfan" data-cite="1PWfan" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="52462" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>This is a fun read, and you do a great job of capturing that LU feel without making it a straight copy of the actual show.</div></blockquote>

falling_star · January 19, 2021

Season 1, Episode 4

Announce Team: Lee Bambino and CJ Weston

Location: Boyle Heights Temple

Show Rating: 47

SEASON 1, EPISODE 4

El Jefe himself, Honest Frank, opens the show in front of the Believers as they cheer on their purveyor of violence.

“Welcome to the Temple, Believers!” Lee Bambino exclaims as the show begins. “Welcome to Lucha Underground, and here he is, El Jefe himself!”

“Believers!” the big, New York man booms. “Thanks for coming and, most importantly, thanks for payin’ at the door,” he laughs. “We’ve got a big show for you tonight, the second of the trios matches heading towards our first ever Lucha Underground Trios Champions! Whoever wins tonight will meet Ali an’ his boys, and another trio to be determined later.” Frank pauses for a moment, letting the Believers cheer this announcement before continuing to speak.

“You know, they say that in order to kill some of their prey, eagles will clutch an animal in its talons and fly up to great heights before dropping their prey so that the fall will kill them,” Frank informs the crowd. “Sometimes that prey even includes snakes… I don’t like snakes. So, with that said, tonight’s trios match… The Eagle Tribe versus The Reptile Tribe!”

“Oh my!” CJ Weston exclaims on commentary. “El Jefe making his feelings known here tonight!”

“But that’s not the only chance at gold we have on deck tonight!” Frank exclaims, and the Believers erupt with cheers once again. “We also have a match where the winner will receive one of the seven ancient Aztec Medallions, just as I promised last week… Extra-ordinary-o Jr. will take on the legendary Acid! Whoever wins that match is one step closer… to the Gift of the Gods! Now, if the lovely Nicole Kiss would be so kind as to get in here and do her job… let’s get this show started!

SEGMENT RATING: 41

“The following lucha is a tag team match, and is scheduled for one fall!” Nicole Kiss excitedly announces. “First, accompanied by Becca… from Rock City USA… Rockin’ Ryan… Stan The Man… The Rock… City… Stars!!”

Rockin’ Ryan and Stan the Man air guitar their way into the Temple and down the stairs as per usual, really playing to the crowd during their entrance and showing off some close-ups of the duo air guaring with some Believers.

“And their opponents, from the Darkest Reaches of Your Mind… Babau… Moroi… The Waking… Nightmares!”

Smoke and the eerie sounds of Aztec death whistles can be heard as Babau and Moroi crawl out of the entrance.

“We heard those unnerving sounds last week, Believers,” Bambino tells us. “The Aztec death whistle is almost a weapon the Aztecs used against their enemies to let them know the warriors were coming.”

“They almost drove Pablo Rodriguez insane last week as he was reminded of The Death Tribe coming to his village, and they’re not doing me a whole lot of good right now, I can tell you that much,” Weston says as The Waking Nightmares get to the ring, Believers covering their ears and shaking their heads.

ROCK CITY EXPRESS VERSUS THE WAKING NIGHTMARES

Another hotly paced opener from The Rock City Stars as they go toe-to-toe with the masked duo of The Death Tribe. The Tribe come in looking to dominate after the mind games of the death whistle entrance, but the Rock City Stars duck under some charging clotheslines and counter with boots to the midsection.

“The Rock City Stars are looking good to start!” Bambino says as they hit stereo dropkicks, and celebrate in the ring as Babau and Moroi roll to the outside. “Can they keep it up? We’ll find out when we get back!” he pitches to commercial.

That proves to be short-lived, however, as when we return and the match gets going, it isn’t long before The Waking Nightmares are working quick tags and ring isolation to have their way with Rockin’ Ryan while Stan The Man yells for the tag on the outside.

“You may have spoken too soon, Bambino, they’re not looking too good right now!” Weston exclaims as Babau and Moroi work over the blonde rock star wannabe in their corner. It isn’t long after that, however, that Rockin’ Ryan starts to make his comeback and manages the hot tag to Stan The Man, who comes in and clears house. It isn’t long after that before The Rock City Stars hit Moroi with the Cover Version to pick up their first victory in Lucha Underground.

WINNERS: ROCK CITY EXPRESS

MATCH RATING: 39

“The Rock City Stars have beaten The Waking Nightmares!” Bambino cries out as they celebrate in the ring. “They have bested The Death Tribe!”

The celebration is short-lived, however, as the sound of Aztec death whistles begin to call out in the Temple once again. The pumped up Rock City Stars, along with their rock chic cheerleader Becca, gather in the center of the ring to look around while The Waking Nightmares creep around on the outside.

Máscara Muerte appears at the top of the entrance stairs, arms raised as he stands there for a moment for the Believers to take in. The Waking Nightmares slither back into the ring and take out The Rock City Stars, knocking them out of the ring before Becca falls to her knees and tries to beg off.

“Oh my God, what are these sick freaks doing?!” Bambino questions, but it is soon answered as The Waking Nightmares hit Becca with their Sleep Paralysis finisher!

“Oh my God!” Weston cries out! “Did you see that, Bambino?!”

Muerte begins down the stairs, arms still raised triumphantly as Babau and Moroi rid the ring of a crumpled Becca. Muerte enters the ring, The Waking Nightmares immediately taking knees in his presence as he produces a microphone from his robes.

“Pablo Rodriguez,” he begins as the death whistles finally cease. “El Padre, we meet in the Temple just as we have met in the past. Does the sound remind you, El Padre? ¿Lo hace? Does it remind you of Paradise Lost? Of your family? Your village? BURNED! All in the name of Death! All for Máscara Muerte, the tribute of all tributes: a whole village prender fuego,” he says with an unholy chuckle. “Not just the people… not just the men, the women… the children… but the structures! The riches! All ablaze in MY name!”

“Believers, this stretches far beyond lucha,” Bambino says somberly.

“This is just plain sick,” Weston adds.

“All in my unholy name, El Padre... and now?? What is left of you? What is left of your soul, tu alma? You are a man of God, but what is left of the man? ¿Qué queda de ti, Pablo Rodríguez? It doesn’t matter… because what it is, no matter how little is left inside of you,” Muerte threatens. “I will find it. I will chew it up, and I will leave the husk of Pablo Rodriguez for my minions to consume!”

SEGMENT RATING: 47

“We’ve got to take a break, Believers, but this is… this is just sick,” Bambino calls.

Back from commercial, we’re treated to a hype video for Jayson “The Sensation” Van Pelt that shows off his training regime as well as some footage of him competing all over the world. We finally settle on him in a locker room, toweling sweat off his forehead after some heavy training and looking at the camera.

“I’ve been all around the world, but now I’ve come to the Temple to showcase my talents,” he says with a smile. “Hi, Jayson the Sensation, but you can call me J… V.. P…” he does the thing with his thumbs even though he’s sitting there by himself in a pair of training shorts.

“Two weeks ago, Extraordinario Jr. found out that no one stops The Sensation, and next week, I’ll be back in front of all you Believers, so breathe easy and take heed… because next week, I’m going to put to rest the legend of Mr. Lucha Tres just like I did his masked compadre… and if these masked freaks want to keep stepping to The Sensation, I might just have to start collecting masks and teach all of the Believers about lucha de apuestas. So, masked freaks… consider this me putting you on notice!”

SEGMENT RATING: 21

When we return to the Temple, Lee Bambino and CJ Weston are sitting at the ringside announce table.

“JVP laying down the gauntlet,” Bambino calls.

“No more masked freaks, or he’s going to start collecting masks, but he might have a hard time finding competition around here if he doesn’t wanna step into the ring with masked luchadores,” Weston says.

“You’re right, Weston, but now, back to Nicole Kiss!” Bambino pitches.

Nicole Kiss is smiling in the center of the ring and ready to start announcing.

“The following lucha is scheduled for one fall, and is a trios match! The winning team will advance to the finals of the Lucha Underground Trios Tourney! First, coming to the ring, from The Snake Pit… Rey Serpiente, Serpiente Uno, Serpiente Doa… The Reptile Tribe!”

The trio make their way into the Temple, Uno and Dos heading down the steps first while Rey Serpiente stands tall behind them. They slither their way into the ring and huddle in the corner, Rey Serpiente sitting on the middle turnbuckle and putting his foot on Serpiente Uno’s shoulder as his minions bow before him awaiting their opponents’ arrival.

“And their opponents, from The Land of the Free… Americana Jr, American Flash, and Dragón Americano… The Eagle Tribe!”

Three masked luchadores decked out in red, white, and blue make their way into the Temple, hyping up the crowd and getting them to chant “USA! USA! USA!”

THE REPTILE TRIBE VERSUS THE EAGLE TRIBE

As they did two weeks ago in their match against The Rock City Express, The Reptile Tribe spend the match letting Rey Serpiente avoid doing much work. This time, however, the match is much more fast-paced as Uno and Dos go 100mph against all three members of The Eagle Tribe.

“This match is going at an insane pace!” Bambino exclaims during a crazy exchange between Dos and Flash that ends in an impressive spinning headscissors takedown that sends Dos rolling out of the ring.

“Trios rules in effect here,” Weston reminds us. “No tag necessary as Serpiente Uno heads into the ring here.”

Uno charges at Flash, and another quick exchange sees Uno sent to the outside as well, leaving Rey Serpiente no choice but to get involved this time. But he’s no slouch in the ring, either, quickly shifting the momentum to his team’s favor where it stays for much the remainder of the match. The finish sees Uno and Dos hitting the Cobra Strike on Americana Jr, and tagging in Rey Serpiente as they did before to make the cover.

WINNERS: THE REPTILE TRIBE

MATCH RATING: 45

“Bah!” Honest Frank scoffs as we come into his office following the last match. “Freakin’ snakes are at it again!”

“Sorry you are displeased, Jefe,” the Aztec Guardian tells him from the corner of the office.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re sorry, but you ain’t gonna do anything about it. That’s why I got--”

Frank is interrupted by a knock at the door, but the person on the other side doesn’t wait for an answer as Pablo Rodriguez enters the office.

“Frank, we need to talk,” El Padre says as he enters the office, a dull sweat on his brow and a confused look in his eyes. “I must face Máscara Muerte, this destruction and desecration cannot stand! I will--”

“Now, now, don’t go getting your panties in a bunch, father,” Frank says dismissively. “I know what you want, but you see, we got a problem.”

“¿Problema?” Rodriguez questions anxiously.

“Si,” Frank says mockingly. “Muerte is the Temple Champion, you can’t just demand a title shot around here.”

“I don’t care about the title, I just wa--” Rodriguez insists, but Frank cuts him off again.

“We have a way that we do things here in the Temple,” Frank says insistently. “You want a match with Muerte? Earn it!”

“You want me to compete? I will compete!” Rodriguez answers. “You tell me when and where! Whatever I must do to get at Máscara Muerte!”

Franks smiles, taking his smoking cigar from the ashtray and sticking it in the corner of his mouth as he leans back in his chair.

“Well, I think you know what you have to do, padre,” Frank grins. “So, let’s say next week… you against Sayeed Ali… in an Aztec Medallion match! You win that, you’re one step closer to getting Muerte.”

Pablo’s lip curls as he stands there staring down Honest Frank. After a moment, he twitches, then wipes his brow.

“Si... next week,” Pablo nods before turning to leave. Honest Frank smiles and takes a pull from his cigar, letting the smoke linger in the air around him before blowing it away with a lungful of smoke.

“Yeah… we’ll see,’ Frank grins as we fade to commercial.

SEGMENT RATING: 66

“The following lucha is scheduled for one fall, and it for one of the seven Ancient Aztec Medallions,” Nicole Kiss says with a smile as some generic electronic music begins to play. “First, coming to the ring, from Mexico City, Mexico…. Extraordinario Jr!”

The masked-and-caped luchador makes his entrance to the Temple with his head held high despite his recent loss in front of the Believers. He plays to the crowd excitedly, hopping up to the ring apron, then to the top rope in a single bound, and coming off with an impressive somersault roll that ends in a pose near the center of the ring.

“And his opponent! From parts unknown… Acid!!”

The mysterious masked man is out next, starting down his opponent from the top of the stairs for a moment before he heads down the steps and into the ring.

“What a main event we have for you, Believers!” Bambino says excitedly.

“Extraordinario Jr versus Acid, a main event anywhere in the world,” Weston says. “But it’s happening here in the Temple!’

ACID VERSUS EXTRAORDINARIO JR

“Acid made a name for himself all across North American and Japan,” Bambino tells us. “Extraordinario, of course, one of the most famous luchadores all across Mexico.” The pair square off in classic lucha libre-style opening, coming to an impressive stalemate as the Believers cheer on their display. From there, however, Acid slows it down with some technical work and offensive focus on Extraordinario’s knees.

“Acid trying to slow down the younger luchador here,” Weston narrates while Acid holds a leglock that allows him to put the boots to the purple-clad luchador’s knee. The story throughout the match is that Acid wants to slow down Extraordinario, and every time it looks like the tide is going to turn, the damage to the knees is his undoing.

Despite an impressive showing by Extraordinario Jr, Acid picks up the win with an Acid Rain Bomb.

WINNER: ACID

MATCH RATING: 40

“Acid is the first luchador in Lucha Underground to win one of the Ancient Aztec Medallions,” Weston says. “The first to earn his way into The Gift of the Gods match!”

“And, on that note, we’ll see you next week, Believers! Pablo Rodriguez takes on Sayeed Ali for another Ancient Aztec Medallion!” Bambino signs off.

Jaysin · January 19, 2021

Ali is really reaping the benefits of helping Frank get to the temple. A trios title shot and a medallion shot? Lucky bastard

Chikbot · January 20, 2021

I'm genuinely loving this. The way Lucha underground translates to the CVerse is honestly marvelous and one of the most original ideas I have seen.

falling_star · January 23, 2021

The Aztec Guardian is on his knees before a secret altar hidden with the Temple, incense smoldering on a plate and a clay bowl of burnt offerings on a low table before him. He breathes in some of the smoke billowing towards him, then breathes it out as he opens his eyes… he seems to be talking to something he sees in the sacrificial burnt offerings.

“El Jefe is different this time, Great Spirit… he knows not of our traditions, he respects not our traditions. Es un hombre irrespetuoso. He has summoned a man to the Temple to do what I am tasked to do… to protect the integrity of our sacred grounds. He knows not my power… knows not implacabilidad.”

The Guardian breathes in some smoke again, then exhales much more briskly this time… noise from the background starts to make it clear that a show is taking place in the Temple.

“I have not even been seen by the Believers, they know not my presence in the Temple,” he says. “I am kept hidden… but such is my fate.”

We can see the conflict in the Guardian’s eyes as he stares into the smoldering bowl.

“I am bound to the Temple… but I am not bound to El Jefe.”

falling_star · January 24, 2021

Season 1, Episode 5

Announce Team: Lee Bambino and CJ Weston

Location: Boyle Heights Temple

Show Rating: 46

SEASON 1, EPISODE 5

The show begins in the office of El Jefe himself, Honest Frank, who is sitting at his desk and counting stacks of money as a big cigar billows smoke into the air from his ashtray.

“Ah, man, a month!” he says excitedly as he sits down a fourth stack of cash. “We only been open a month, and look at this! I don’t gotta pay nobody nothin’, either! It’s all mine!”

From the shadows of the office, The Aztec Guardian nods and stands by silently.

“ Si, Jefe,” the Guardian says stoically. “En verdad eres un hombre rico.”

“These suckers fight for nothin’ more than the Temple prizes,” Frank marvels. “They’re like suckers on a game show around here! Win your tickers, cash ‘em in for prizes, and give me all your cash!”

Frank picks up his cigar and takes a drag before opening one of his desk drawers, already lined with cash, and adding his four new stacks to the stash. He sits there for a brief moment, smiling and puffing on his cigar before there’s a knock at the door.

“Come in,” Frank says, letting out an exasperated sigh when he sees the man who has entered his office.

“Ah, padre!” Frank exclaims. “To what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you in office today? More mumbo jumbo about Máscara Muerte, no doubt?”

“Frank, you do not understand,” Pablo Rodriguez tells the boss. “This is not about the Temple Championship, this is not about gold!”

“So it’s about your immoral quest for vengeance then, is it?” Frank chides.

“Frank!” Rodriguez shouts, slamming his hands down on the boss’ desk. “¡Quiero Máscara Muerte, ya!”

“Lower your voice, Father!” Frank snaps, the Aztec Guardian stepping ever so slightly forward from his dark corner. “Now look, I told you how it is around here! Máscara Muerte is our Champion around here, you don’t just waltz in my door and demand your shot.”

“And I told you, I don’t want the gold, Frank,” Rodriguez reminds him through clenched teeth.

“All the same,” Frank tells him. “You want your match with Muerte? Then your quest starts tonight, just like I told you last week. Nothing’s changed, padre. Claim your Aztec Medallion tonight against Sayeed Ali and assure your place in the Gift of the Gods match.”

Pablo Rodriguez throws his hands up in frustration, muttering in Spanish under his breath as Frank continues speaking.

“Win the Gift of the Gods, and then you can have your match with Máscara Muerte,” Frank tells him. “No sooner than that.”

“The Gift of the Gods can be exchanged at any time, yes?” Pablo questions.

“Well, now, I’m a promoter,” Frank tells him. “You gotta give me a week to pack the Temple with Believers. So, I take it, you win and you want your match the next week?”

“Si,” El Padre answers; Frank nods in agreement.

“Fine,” the boss says. “You win the Gift of the Gods, I’ll give you Muerte the following week… but you gotta win it first.” Rodriguez clenches his jaw and looks down at Frank, then up at the Guardian before nodding confidently and leaving the office. Frank kicks his feet up and takes another pull from his cigar, smiling to himself as he watches Pablo leave before we’re taken into the Temple and the cheering Believers.

SEGMENT RATING: 54

¡OLE! ¡OLE! ¡OLE! ¡LUCHA! ¡LUCHA!

“Listen to the sound of the Believers!” Lee Bambino exclaims as the latest episode of the show begins. “We have such a great show on deck for you tonight, our second Medallion match will be in the main event.”

As the commentators are talking about tonight’s events, the Believers turn their attention to the entrance stairs where Jayson “The Sensation” Van Pelt is making his way into the Temple.

“Aw, now what does this guy want?” CJ Weston asks.

“JVP scheduled for lucha tonight, let’s just hope he doesn’t wanna talk first,” Bambino says.

“You can smell it when opens his mouth, too, Bambino?” Weston questions his announce partner.

“I can almost smell how full of shit he is from here,” Bambino says, dropping the innuendo as JVP enters the ring and does his familiar pose for the Believers, some of them chanting “J! V! P!” along with him as he bobs his thumbs.

“You know, last week, I put Lucha Underground on notice,” The Sensation begins as he paces the ring with a microphone in hand. “I said no more masked freaks because I want some REAL competition. I’ve been all over North America, all over the world, and I did NOT come to this Temple to join some circus sideshow! So I want Mr. Lucha Tres to get his ass out here, and I want everyone to know that this is the LAST time I step into the ring with a masked luchador unless that luchador is willing to bet their mask that they can beat me! So, Nicole, dollface, get in here and do your job, so we can get down to some business!”

SEGMENT RATING: 35

“The following lucha is scheduled for one fall! In the ring, from Montreal, Quebec, Canada… Jayson “The Sensation” Van Pelt,” Nicole announces with a hint of disdain in her voice.

“His opponent, coming to the ring from Mexico City, Mexico… Mister… Lucha… Tres!”

JAYSON VAN PELT VERSUS MR. LUCHA III

“You know, Mr. Lucha Tres is part of a prestigious lineage that has found success not just in Mexico, but in America as well,” Bambino says as the match starts to get underway.

“He hasn’t found much success in Lucha Underground thus far, Bambino,” Weston snarks.

“Well, can’t argue with that, but he looks to be in control right now,” Bambino retorts as Mr. Lucha III takes down JVP with a waistlock and rolls into a pinning predicament for barely a two count. From there, the two work a fast-paced and traditional style lucha match until JVP tries to cheat just like he did against Extraordinario Jr. in week two. This actually brings out the purple-and-silver luchador, who points out the underhanded tactics to the referee.

JVP starts to argue with Extraordinario and the referee, allowing Mr. Lucha III some time to recover. While the argument is still going on, Mr. Lucha III pulls JVP backs towards the center of the ring and nails him with his Third Strike finisher. Extraordinario drops off the apron, pointing out the pinfall going on in the ring and allowing Mr. Lucha III to pick up his first victory in Lucha Underground.

“I think the quote-unquote masked freaks of Lucha Underground have returned fire on Jayson the Sensation!” Bambino exclaims. “Believers, don’t go anywhere, we’ll be right back!”

WINNER: MR. LUCHA III

MATCH RATING: 34

We return from commercial to a dark screen, faint sing-song chanting heard as it eventually becomes clear the camera is traveling downward. As dirt and roots are shown on-screen, we start to come to a large opening underground, candles all along the dirt walls lighting the hole of a room. Seated in high-backed wooden chairs around a long, ornate wooden table are three men among a host of other empty chairs. It soon becomes clear, as they bounce and rock in their chairs around the table filled with silver platters of food and steaming tea kettles, that they are having a tea party.

“We’re going to the Temple! Going to the Temple! Going to the Temple!” the three of them excitedly chant in sing-song all in unison before coming to an abrupt stop.

“Well, boys!!” the lone masked member of the group says, pausing to take a long sip of an obviously hot cup of tea before smacking his lips and saying, “AH!” with a puff of smoke exiting his mouth. “It’s… almost… time!!” He’s wearing a harlequin mask and a long jacket, tights matching his mask.

“YEEESSSS!!!!” a main with purple-and-green streaked hair beneath a large, velvet top hat exclaims, steppling his fingers and wiggling them together excitedly. “It’s almost time for The Rabbit Tribe toooooooo….” he says as he starts wiggling in his chair, “GO TO THE TEMPLE! THE TEMPLE! THE TEMPLE!”

A third man with a weird frock of dark hair lets out an oddball laugh and claps happily, knocking over a hot tea kettle and paying no attention as the boiled liquid spills over the table on down to the dirt floor beneath it. “Yes, yes, yesss!! NO!!!” he shouts as he finally notices the spilled tea.

“The Great White Rabbit has shown us the way, all that’s left is to travel the road, my friends! Logic and proportion are sloppy dead, we must go before The Red Queen says ‘off with our heads!’” the masked man with dark skin says, the other two stopping what they are doing and cooing at what he says.

“We must go!” the man in the top hat says anxiously.

“Go we must!” says the other unmasked man, on his hands and knees mourning the spilled tea with dirt now smeared on his face and chest.

“We mustn’t be late!” the masked man says as he stands up, revealing his full outfit and actually posing with jazz hands for a moment.

“Late we mustn’t be!” the oddball on the ground says as he stands up, sitting up the knocked over kettle and grabbing a grape from one of the platters to pop in his mouth, chewing it obnoxiously.

“Well, well, well,” the man in the top hat says as he stands to join his comrades. “You know what that means? Weeeeeeeee’re…” he leads the men in again as they start they sing-song chant, camera travelling back up from the rabbit hole as their sound echoes up.

“... going to the Temple! Going to the Temple! Going to the Temple!”

The scene fades to commercial.

SEGMENT RATING: 41

“Well, uh, Believers…” Bambino says as we return to the Temple after the break. “This is, uh… The Rabbit Tribe, and, as you can see…”

The three men from the video begin to filter into the arena, not using the entrance steps but coming in from the crowd entrance near Honest Frank’s office.

“The weirdos are here,” Weston finishes snarkily.

“The following lucha is a tag team match,” Nicole Kiss announces. “Making their way to the ring, from Down The Rabbit Hole, accompanied to the ring by Bromista…. Remmy Syke… Matt Sparrow… The Rabbit Tribe!!”

Remmy Skye struts around the ring his top hat while Matt Sparrow rubs his hands together and continues laughing, the masked man Bromista acting like a ringleader as he jumps up a few steps of the entrance stairway and raises his hands like a conductor.

“Let’s get ‘em boys!!” Bromista shouts to his friends, Skye and Sparrow rolling into the ring and huddling together in one corner, whispering and laughing to each other after Skye hangs his top hat on the ringpost.

“And their opponents, from The Obsidian Temple… accompanied to the ring by the Black Cat… El Jaguar… Tigre Salvaje Jr…. Los Gatos Salvajes!!”

THE RABBIT TRIBE VERSUS LOS GATOS SALVAJES

“Well, these three are certainly… interesting characters,” Bambino says as Bromista dances around outside the ring for the crowd.

“Did Nicole say they were from ‘Down the Rabbit Hole?’” Weston asks. “That, uh… that might say something.”

Skye starts off in the ring with El Jaguar, and actually looks good as the match begins. Despite their oddball antics, The Rabbit Tribe is mostly business in the ring and they’re able to keep step with Los Gatos Salvajes. The match eventually spills out of the ring, Bromista getting involved and letting himself be used as a launching pad for Sparrow to do a crossbody into all three members of The Cult of the Silver Tiger.

“What happened to the other weirdo?” Weston asks as Sparrow and Bromista roll Los Gatos Salvajes back into the ring.

“Oh my God!” Bambino exclaims as the luchadores all get back to their feet in the ring. “There he is!!”

Remmy Skye is on top of El Jefe’s office! He looks around, takes a few hops like a bunny, then gets a running start and dives off of the office with a beautiful senton!

“We’ve seen a couple of men go up there so far, and it still makes me clench up every time!” Weston shouts.

¡ANIMO! ¡ANIMO! ¡ANIMO!

Skye scrambles out of the pile of bodies to make a pinfall, and picks up the win for his team after that crazy stunt off of the office.

WINNERS: THE RABBIT TRIBE

MATCH RATING: 47

“Believers, this just may be the craziest Lucha Underground yet! Don’t go anywhere, we’ll be right back!”

Before we go to commercial, we’re taken backstage where The Cult of the Silver Tiger are entering a locker room and licking their wounds. The Rock City Express enters, laughing at the four members of the Cult there without their leader.

“That sure was something out there,” Rockin’ Ryan laughs.

“Yeah, those guys looked like they were on psychedelics, and you couldn’t get the job done?” Charlie California asks. “Ouch!”

Amo Del Gato stands up and gets in California’s face.

“What’s that?” Del Gato asks.

“I said it was pathetic,” California reiterates. “Just like you and the rest of your little cult.”

“You dare disrespect The Great Silver Tiger?” Black Cat practically hisses at the rock stars.

“Oh, he dares,” Stan The Man nods. “He dares.”

“That’s right, I do dare,” California nods. “Just like I dare you to get in the ring with me next week. You gonna do it… or are you scaredy cat?”

Amo Del Gato flexes up on California, practically nose-to-nose with him for a moment.

“Si,” Gato nods. “Next week.”

Becca steps forward and pulls Charlie California back, repeating “next week” herself as The Rock City Express filters out of the locker room as we head to commercials.

SEGMENT RATING: 38

“Welcome back, Believers!” Bambino greets us as some west coast hip-hop instrumental plays in the Temple, and Sayeed Ali makes his way out to boos from the Believers.

“The following lucha is scheduled for one fall, and it is for one of the seven Ancient Aztec Medallions,” Nicole Kiss announces. “Coming to the ring, from Boyle Heights, California… Sayeed… Ali!!”

Ali makes his way into the ring, throwing up the BHC gang sign for the camera and mouthing off that he’s going to have to “body some fool right now” before going over to Nicole Kiss and grabbing the microphone from her hands.

“Gimme dat,” Ali shouts. “I’m here for one reason, me and the homies here for one reason… gold! I done said I ‘on’t care what I gotta do to get it done, and I meant it! Men, women, luchadores, wrestlers, street fighters, or preachers, it don’t matter! So, Nicole, I’mma let you finish, but just know that Ali is the greatest of all time! All time! And I’m about to 187 El Padre, priest or nah,” he taunts before giving the microphone back to Nicole Kiss.

SEGMENT RATING: 38

“And his opponent, from El Monasterio... the Priest of Pain, Pablo… Rodriguez!”

“The Believers’ favorite makes his way into the Temple, and we are about to get underway,” Bambino says.

SAYEED ALI VERSUS PABLO RODRIGUEZ

Ali takes the fight right to Pablo, jumping him before the bell and putting the boots to him in the corner. He controls the early portion of the match until he goes for a powerbomb, and Pablo counters with a hurricanrana.

“Big move for El Padre!” Weston says as Pablo takes over the match.

“It all comes down to luchador versus street fighter in this one, and, right now, lucha has the upperhand!” Bambino exclaims.

There’s plenty of back-and-forth in the match, the two mismatched styles working pretty well together for one of the better main events in Lucha Underground’s short history. Pablo Rodriguez picks up the win, and earns his way into the Gift of the Gods match, with a Sinner’s Salvation on Ali.

WINNER:PABLO RODRIGUEZ

MATCH RATING: 47

El Padre doesn’t have long to celebrate before the sound of Aztec death whistles ring out in the Temple, The Waking Nightmares and Zombi hitting the ring while Máscara Muerte stands atop the stairs with the whistle and directing traffic. Babau and Moroi are on Pablo in an instant, taking him down and putting the boots to him and then spread him out as Zombi heads to the top rope.

“What is Zombi doing?” Weston asks just before a dazzling corkscrew moonsault from the Undead Luchador.

“Oh my God!” Bambino exclaims! “The Death Tribe taking it to the Priest of Pain! Believers, we’re almost out of time, but, surely, someone will put a stop to this?!”

“I don’t the think El Padre has any friends in the Temple!” Weston exclaims as Máscara Muerte enters the ring now, his followers lifting Rodriguez up so Muerte can level him with a vicious Buzzsaw Kick.

“We’ll see you next week, Believers!” Bambino signs off.

SEGMENT RATING: 56

Blodyxe · January 24, 2021

Man, Rabbit Tribe gets the best angles on this board

Great episode!

Dalton · January 24, 2021

I'm going to put my comments in white text below, because this is seriously one of the best pieces of storytelling I've seen on these board, and I implore everyone to start reading from the first post.

The beginning with Aerostar hiding the Gauntlet in the CornellVerse universe was a brilliant touch to kick things off. Honest Frank's introduction was very good, with the honest man owning a pawn shop in Queens.

Following that with the introductions of the cast of characters we have, every single one had a reason to be in the Temple. Pablo's dialogue really sells the Temple as something special, and his interactions with Frank and the Guardian were comedic yet serious.

I enjoyed how the first show was presented, each segment was good, but the main event was a piece of art. I am not exaggerating when I say that I believe it is the best written match I've ever read on GDS. Each and every moment played into each character's motivations and rivalries. My favorite part was the three duos staring each other down; that was cool. If you posted it three days earlier, I'd nominate it for Match of the Year! But I got you for 2021.

EY's introduction was neat. Giving Aztec Guardian a conflict in the Temple is a nice wrinkle to the stories being told. Frank is greedy and wants what's best for himself, but what's best for himself is also what's good for the Temple because he makes more money if it succeeds. Guardian is sworn to protect the Temple AND Frank, but Frank is souring on him big-time.

One critique I have, if it even is one, is that I think I read a total of three dives from El Jefe's office in the first five episodes. I believe moments like that should be ultra-rare and special when they occur.

You really got something going here falling_star. It's clear that you enjoy writing this and I sincerely hope to see it continue for a very long time.

falling_star · January 29, 2021

Season 1, Episode 6

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Announce Team: Lee Bambino and CJ Weston

Location: Boyle Heights Temple

Show Rating: 43

<div style="text-align:right;">SEASON 1, EPISODE 6</div>

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Our show this week starts in a dark cemetery at night, Máscara Muerte coming into view as he strolls quietly through the graveyard in his robes and mask.

“La muerte... nos rodea,” he begins as he comes upon a large headstone with an ornate, stone angel sitting atop it. Muerte stops and looks up, then puts his hand on old, cracked stone. “Pablo Rodriguez… El Padre... your obsession will be your undoing, this much I can promise you. I want you to think back, padre... back all those years… back to your Paradise Lost.”

Muerte turns to the camera and crouches down in front of the headstone, adjusting his robes and placing his hands on the ground.

“Do you think your wife… your children… would approve of this quest for vengeance? Do you think your God approves?” he asks, letting the question hang in the air for a long moment. “Did you not put their souls to rest long ago, padre? Should your time of mourning really last a lifetime? Would she have approved?” Muerte turns his head ever so slightly back at the headstone, then stands up with evil intentions clearly in his eyes.

“You tell me, Pablo,” Muerte says. “What would Camila say if she knew that you didn’t dedicate your life to a God who spared you from my sacrifice… but to a never ending quest for vengeance? Because, make no mistake, padre... your quest is never ending, for I am never ending. ¡La muerte es eterna! Strike me down, padre, and Máscara Muerte will rise again for I am one of many. ¡Un avatar de la muerte!”

He raises his arms in a crucifix position in front of the headstone, the sculptures of two small children at either side of it in full view for the first time. “If you want them to continue to rest in peace, padre... you will relinquish your Medallion and leave the Temple for good! You will stop your pursuit of The Death Tribe, y detente para siempre,” he shouts. “Or there will be Hell to pay… for them…”

Máscara Muerte lowers his arms and walks away as the camera zooms in on the headstone, and the three brass plaques in place on the base of it: Camila Rodriguez, 1973-1994; Josue Rodriguez, 1989-1994; and Mariana Rodriguez, 1987-1994.

<div style="text-align:right;">SEGMENT RATING: 55</div>

¡OLE! ¡OLE! ¡OLE! ¡LUCHA! ¡LUCHA!

The Believers are clapping and chanting as the show enters the Temple, Lee Bambino and CJ Weston welcoming everyone to the show with The LA Stars already in the ring before they pitch to Nicole Kiss.

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“The following lucha is a tag team match, and is scheduled for one fall! Already in the ring, from Hollywood, California, The L.. A… Stars!”

The masked men pose before someone in the audience screams, “OH MY GOD! IT’S RICH AND FAMOUS!” Some new music plays in the Temple, and two very brash young men in stylish sunglasses enter from the stairs.

“And their opponents… from The Big City… Rich.. and… Famous!!” Nicole Kiss announces as the newcomers make their way into ring, one of them taking the microphone away from Nicole and shooing her out of the ring.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, go on, sweetheart, and get out of here… let someone talented enough to introduce us do the talking,” says the bigger of the two. “And, of course, I mean us when I say that. Ladies and gentlemen, Believers, whatever you’d like to be called, my name is Jake Idol and alongside me is Jackpot Jordan,” he motions to the slightly smaller man beside him, who nods and then they say in unison, “and we’re Rich and Famous!”

“These two over here claim to be stars,” Jackpot Jordan scoffs, holding the mic now. “Well, me and Idol? We’re gonna run you out of town! Because this Temple is only big enough for ONE tag team, and it just so happens that that tag team is… RICH AND FAMOUS!”

<div style="text-align:right;">SEGMENT RATING: 48</div>

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RICH AND FAMOUS VERSUS THE LA STARS

“I’m not sure the Temple is big enough for the egos on these two, Bambino,” Weston remarks as the match gets underway. The LA Stars attempt to use their speed to their advantage, but they’re no match for the strength of Jake Idol or the cunning of Jackpot Jordan. The heels add insult to injury whenever possible, paintbrushing their opponents with slaps and grinding their masked faces into the mat constantly in the opening minutes.

“Don’t go anywhere, Believers!” Bambino exclaims before the match is bisected by a commercial break.

When we return, The LA Stars have momentarily taken the upperhand and we come back just in time to see a big double team spot from the Stars on Jackpot Jordan for a two-count. We go a few more minutes of back-and-forth before Jake Idol takes out one of the Stars outside the ring, then slides in for a double-team finisher on the other.

“The House Always Wins!” Weston exclaims, christening their finisher as the Believers see it for the first time while the referee makes the three count.

<div style="text-align:right;">WINNERS: RICH AND FAMOUS

MATCH RATING: 42</div>

“Buckle up, Believers, because we’re about to go Down The Rabbit Hole,” Bambino says as the camera settles on the announce table after the match.

“Oh, not again, Bambino, I can’t take these nutjobs,” Weston sighs.

“Be that as it may, we have a new message… from The Rabbit Tribe,” Bambino pitches to the video.

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The camera travels down the rabbit hole once again to the cavernous lair of The Rabbit Tribe, all seated in their high back wooden chairs, wiggling around and cheering to celebrate their debut win last week.

“We really gave it to them wildcats, didn’t we, boys??” Bromista asks, Matt Sparrow nodding so fast he’s almost headbanging and Remmy Skye clapping happily. “This week is, uh… different,” he says followed by an over exaggerated, dramatic gulp.

“Different this week is!” Matt Sparrow crows, covering his eyes and cowering in his chair. “DEATH!!” he cries, pointing to two bananas and an apple on the table that seem to morph into a skull & crossbones in his eyes. “DEEEEAAAATTHH!!!” he screeches once again, hiding under the table.

“We mustn’t be afraid, boys!!” Bromista reassures them. “The Great White Rabbit will protect us, for he leads the way! The way to… VICTORY!!” The masked man stands and poses, arms up victoriously before he realizes he’s knocked over a pot of tea. “Noooo!!!” he howls, falling to his knees and trying in vain to scoop up the hot liquid. “Speak to me!! Speak to me, friend!!” he cries at the tea, Matt Sparrow still shivering and hiding beneath the table.

Remmy Skye grabs the camera and turns it his way, sitting back in his chair and kicking his feet up on the table, popping a grape in his mouth before adjusting his top hat.

“The Great White Rabbit leads the way, and this week, he leads us through the valley in the shadow of death,” Skye says in as serious a tone as we’ve seen from any of the members of The Rabbit Tribe thus far. “We’ll be,” he tries to contain his laughter but can’t help but let out a chuckle, “quick like bunnies! We’ll hop right through you, because you don’t scare any of us!”

Matt Sparrow lets out a frightened howl from beneath the table, shaking his head in disagreement.

“That’s right… none of us!” Skye says confidently, nodding his head decisively and grabbing another grape. Bromista suddenly hops up from his knees, shaking his head and pointing to a section of the dirt wall where they have carved a clock into the dirt, the time constantly displaying as 6:45 on the crudely imprinted carving.

“We’re late!!” Bromista howls as the three of them all stand and start racing around the table. “We’re late! We’re late!!” they all crow, the camera moving back up through the earth and out of The Rabbit Hole as we go to commercial.

<div style="text-align:right;">SEGMENT RATING: 42</div>

When we come back from commercial, Nicole Kiss is already in the ring and ready to do her announcing duties.

“The following lucha is scheduled for one fall! Coming to the ring first, from Rock City USA… accompanied to the ring by Becca, representing The Rock City Express… Charlie California!”

The young blonde air guitars and headbangs his way into the arena, standing atop the entrance stairs and playing to the crowd with Becca for a moment before making his way down and rolling into the ring.

“And his opponent, accompanied to the ring by the Black Cat… from The Obsidian Temple… Amo Del Gato!”

The masked luchadora Black Cat leads her charge into the Temple, both being members of The Cult of the Silver Tiger. Amo Del Gato points and roars at California before pouncing down the steps to enter the ring.

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CHARLIE CALIFORNIA VERSUS AMO DEL GATO

“This match is the result of an altercation last week,” Bambino reminds us as the two luchadores begin to square off. “Amo Del Gato and the rest of his, let’s say, fellow Silver Tiger worshippers took exception to some comments California and the Rock City Express made after their loss to The Rabbit Tribe last week.”

“How are you supposed to prepare for any of those Rabbit weirdos?” Weston asks, the action rolling on in the ring with Amo Del Gato one-upping California in the early going and putting a beating on him.

“I guess we’ll find out in our main event tonight if The Death Tribe is prepared for them,” Bambino says. “The second of our trios tourney matches will see them go 3-on-3 with The Rabbit Tribe, but, back in the ring now, California taking control!”

Charlie California is indeed controlling the match now, a hip toss reversal giving him some momentum to shine. The Black Cat eventually gets involved to turn the tides, but Becca is quickly there to pull her off the apron and a fight breaks out between the two valets!

“Becca and Black Cat brawling on the outside while the match continues,” Bambino comments.

Amo Del Gato doesn’t hold his momentum for long before California catches him with a Cali Cutter seemingly out of nowhere for the victory!

<div style="text-align:right;">WINNER: CHARLIE CALIFORNIA

MATCH RATING: 30</div>

“California picking up the victory, I don’t imagine that brings much pleasure to the great Silver Tiger or his followers,” Bambino notes as Charlie California and Becca make their way out of the Temple with Black Cat trying to rouse Amo Del Gato in the ring.

“Wait a minute, Bambino! Look!” CJ Weston calls as JOJI stalks his way into the arena, crouched down close to the floor and crawling on all fours towards the ring.

“The Hunter is here!” Bambino exclaims as JOJI slides into the ring and grabs Black Cat. “Wh-- what’s he doing?!”

“JOJI MIRACLE EXPLOSION!” Weston shouts as JOJI lifts Black Cat up and nails her with his finisher. “He just broke that feline in two!”

JOJI stands over Amo Del Gato now as the Believers roar, pulling a snare from his waistband and wrapping it around his fallen foe’s ankles.

“I think The Hunter is claiming a trophy! Bambino calls.

“Yeah, but it’s someone else’s kill, Bambino!” Weston argues.

“I don’t think that matters much to the wild man,” Bambino retorts as JOJI starts to haul Amo Del Gato out of the Temple by his ankles. Amo rouses a bit and starts to struggle, but JOJI boots him in the face and continues to pull him along.

“Don’t go anywhere, Believers!” Bambino implores us. “We’ll be right back!”

<div style="text-align:right;">SEGMENT RATING: 15</div>

Nicole Kiss is cued up and ready to go as we return from the advertisements, smiling and waving to the Believers for a moment before she lifts the microphone.

“The following lucha is a tag team match, and is scheduled for one fall! Now heading to the ring, from parts unknown… the duo of Acid and Acid Two!”

“Teacher and student, master and protege, whatever you want to call them, Acid and Acid II know each other very well, they function as a unit very well,” Bambino narrates as the pair head to the ring.

“That’s right, Acid is a legendary luchadore with a very prestigious mask, his student Acid II still making a name for himself,” Weston adds before Nicole Kiss takes back over in the ring.

“And their opponents, first, from The Land of The Rising Sun… The Great Avatar!!”

The Asian luchador makes his way into the Temple, and immediately begins climbing to the top of El Jefe’s office!

“Oh, not already, Bambino!” Weston says dramatically. “I’m getting too old for this shit, my heart can’t take it!”

Avatar stands atop the office and points down tauntingly at the pair in the ring; before they can head out to meet him, music begins to play in the Temple and it brings them to a stop on the ring apron.

“And his partner, from Saltillo, Coahuila, Mexico…. Amazing Fire Fly!”

“Baby… face… fire!” Bambino exclaims as Amazing Fire Fly makes his way into the Temple, wagging his finger at Acid and Acid II. The Great Avatar motions from the top of the office to remind them that he took Acid II off the top with an Avatar Driver Mk. II during Aztec Warfare.

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ACID & ACID II VERSUS THE GREAT AVATAR & AMAZING FIRE FLY

Amazing Fire Fly charges the ring and takes it to Acid II while Acid heads up to the top of the office.

“It never turns out well up there,” Bambino laments.

“You’re tellin’ me,” Weston adds with an exasperated sigh.

The match begins with Amazing Fire Fly and Acid II in the ring while their partners brawl on top of the office, Fire Fly is a ball of fire the whole time. Despite the tease, no one comes off of the office and Acid and The Great Avatar fight their way down and through the crowd before, miraculously, taking their places on the apron.

“Oh, my heart, “Weston sighs with relief as the luchadores come down.

We get a fairly fast-paced tag match from there, and, much to CJ Weston’s distress, there is still a huge spot so as not to disappoint the Believers. With Acid laying on a table inside the ring, Amazing Fire Fly pulls out a ladder from beneath the ring a climbs to the top of it, signalling he is about to do something… well, amazing.

“Oh my God, here we go!” Weston groans as Fire Fly does a swan dive senton… and Acid moves! Fire Fly goes plunging through the table, allowing Acid to get a groggy cover while Avatar and Acid II lie around the ring in the wreckage of the match.

<div style="text-align:right;">WINNERS: ACID & ACID II

MATCH RATING: 35</div>

“Something tells me this war is far from over,” Bambino says as the camera pans around the broken table in the ring, the still upright ladder, and the chairs strewn about ringside.

“Something tells me you’re right, Bambino,” Weston adds as Acid slowly gets out the ring to collect his protege and the show heads to a commercial break.

“Believers, it is time for our main event,” Lee Bambino says excitedly when the show returns. “The second of the trios matches in our trios tourney.”

“Whoever wins this match will join the Boyle Heights Connection and The Reptile Tribe in a match to determine the first Lucha Underground Trios Champions,” CJ Weston says before The Rabbit Tribe begin to make their way into the Temple. “Oh, no,” he groans. “These nutjobs are never gonna make it tonight.”

“I guess we’re going to find out,” Bambino says. “Take it away, Nicole!”

“The following lucha is a trios match, and is scheduled for one fall! The winning team will advance to the finals of the Lucha Underground Trios Tourney! Making their way to the ring, from Down The Rabbit Hole… Bromista, Remmy Skye, Matt Sparrow… The Rabbit Tribe!”

The oddball trio hop and roll around ringside, Bromista acting as the ringleader as has become the custom. Matt Sparrow walks around clapping and laughing like a lunatic while Remmy Skye hops around in his top hat. It’s all fun and games for the rabbits for a moment until the sounds of the Aztec death whistle can be heard in the arena again, smoke pouring from the door at the top of the entrance stairs.

“That unnerving sound can only mean one thing!” Bambino says.

“And their opponents, coming to the ring from the Darkest Reaches of Your Mind… Babau, Moroi… The Waking Nightmares! Their partner, from Beyond the Grave… Zombi! Together they are, The Death Tribe!”

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THE RABBIT TRIBE VERSUS THE DEATH TRIBE

Bromista starts off in the ring, our first glimpse of him in action as he was on the outside last week. The Death Tribe look good early on, Babau and Moroi using their double team offense to get the best of Bromista and Remmy Skye for the better part of the match. The main story is that Matt Sparrow is too scared to get in the ring with The Death Tribe until he is the only one available to take a hot tag from Remmy Skye. He comes in and clears house quickly, running wild and silly before he takes down Zombi with a Bird Brain Buster for the win.

<div style="text-align:right;">WINNERS: THE RABBIT TRIBE

MATCH RATING: 40</div>

Following the match, we’re taken inside El Jefe’s office, just on the other side of the door where a shadow steps up and knocks. After several moments, there is no answer so the figure knocks again.

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“Frank?” the unmistakable voice of Pablo Rodriguez calls from the other side of the door.

A man in a leather trench coat steps up to the door, and opens it.

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“You are not--” Pablo begins, but he is cut off by the attack of “The Hitman” Ernest Youngman! The Hitman assaults him with forearms, driving him back away from the office and into the Temple in front of the Believers!

“Who is this??” Bambino exclaims.

“I thought the show was over??” Weston puzzles.

Pablo tries to fire back, knocking off the man’s sunglasses but his murderous eyes just stare back before he goes on the assault again. Closed fists this time, knocking him back towards the ring before smashing his head into the ring steps. The Hitman is brutal in his assault, utilizing the ring steps and ringpost before shoving El Padre into the ring. El Jefe himself, Honest Frank finally appears before the Believers.

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“I’m sorry, El Padre, but…”

The Hitman has Pablo up, and irish whips him into the ropes before running into the criss-cross ropes himself and nailing him with a huge shoulder block dubbed The Hit.

“... your never ending quest for vengeance bores me already. From now on, I want you to stay outta my office!”

The Hitman grabs Rodriguez by the hair and forces him to look at Honest Frank.

“You hear him?” The Hitman screams. “Do you hear him??”

“Stay outta my office, or I’ll have you thrown outta my Temple!” Frank yells. “And then… you’ll never get your shot. Do you hear me, Padre?”

<div style="text-align:right;">SEGMENT RATING: 48</div>

“This is disgusting, but we are outta time!” Bambino says as the show goes off the air.

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Dalton · January 30, 2021

EY is clutch. Hope you got him on a written deal! Surprised to see some comedy geeks go over the top rudo faction, and I'm sure Death Mask Dude will be very unhappy with his trio of zombies.

Great show!

falling_star · February 13, 2021

El Jefe is sitting behind his desk, cigar tucked in his lip, and a whiskey in a rocks glass in one hand as he holds it up in toast.

“I can’t thank you enough, Ernie,” Honest Frank smiles. “Every week, this guy’s in my office, ‘oh, Frank, my wife’ or ‘Frank, Máscara Muerte cannot be allowed to hold the title.’ My God, man, it was getting old.”

“The Hitman” Ernest Youngman smiles back, a whiskey of his own in hand as the pair toast and each takes a sip.

“Don’t mention it, Frank,” Youngman sighs. “Your money’s always good with me, and you said something about gold?”

“Yes, yes,” Frank waves, taking one last puff of his cigar before putting it in an ashtray. He opens one of his desk drawers, and pulls out a few of the remaining Aztec Medallions, sitting them on the desk for Youngman to see. “Ancient Aztec Medallions, or, uh, some shit like that… put ‘em all together, you get a title shot. But, you just need one…”

“I just need one?” Youngman asks, brow quirking up and revealing an eyebrow from behind his mirrored sunglasses.

“All you need is one to get your way into the Gift of the Gods match,” Frank confirms. “Once you win the match, the shot is yours.”

“Didn’t you already promise the shot to that local thug that helped you out?” Youngman asks.

“Ali? No, no,” Frank waves off the idea. “I only offered him a shot, plus a shot at the trios gold… our debt is more than settled.”

Youngman nods and takes another sip of his drink.

“But, uh… there is one more thing I need you to take care of for me on your way to winning the Gift of the Gods,” Frank admits, and Youngman smiles. “I need you to get rid a’ this Aztec Guardian fella what’s been hangin’ around the Temple. He’s supposed to work for me, but he’s all in my business when he doesn’t need to be… he’s the reason I had to bring you out here, wouldn’t take care of the padre for me.”

“Hell, if that’s the case, I’ll do this one for free,” the Hitman says after another sip.

“Excellent, Ernie, excellent,” Frank says as he sips his own whiskey. “I’ll set it up this week… Ernest Youngman versus the Aztec Guardian for one of the Ancient Aztec Medallions. Cheers!”

Jaysin · March 28, 2021

*patiently waiting for one of my favorite diaries to return*

falling_star · March 31, 2021

Jaysin · April 1, 2021

You are mean.

falling_star · April 1, 2021

You are mean.

The post isn't without purpose, I promise.

A bit of a note, though-- this dynasty is far from dead, but it is on the backburner right now as I finish up my chapters of the EMLL joint-venture with Historian, Dalton, and ScoY2J. It will return after I've passed the torch to the next writer over there.

Jaysin · April 1, 2021

The post isn't without purpose, I promise.
A bit of a note, though-- this dynasty is far from dead, but it is on the backburner right now as I finish up my chapters of the EMLL joint-venture with Historian, Dalton, and ScoY2J. It will return after I've passed the torch to the next writer over there.

Ooohh, do you have a link for that joint venture? I am a fan of everyone involved, but haven't seen it bouncing around.

Also, thanks for the update! This and your TCW diary are two of the five or so diaries I'm keeping up with currently.

falling_star · April 1, 2021

Sure do!

EMLL: Fantasía Oscura

falling_star · December 11, 2021

Point of interest: Lucha Underground: Return to The Temple [CVERSE]

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Lucha Underground: Alternate Reality, Honestly [C-VERSE]

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