The Wonderful Wizard of Ottawa - Cverse

Pteroid · October 31, 2018

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="DarK_RaideR" data-cite="DarK_RaideR" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="45786" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Good to know. Your flair for comedy is always a joy to read. Hope all is well.</div></blockquote> Eh, retail, you know how it is

Leion · October 31, 2018

can't wait for your return! <img alt="

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DarK_RaideR · November 1, 2018

Eh, retail, you know how it is

That explains so much, actually

Pteroid · November 6, 2018

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CFW Presents:

A 90 Minute Wrestling Show

Attendance: 83 (No Change)

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"hello and welcome to another cfw wrestling show, i am jerome turner here with my broadcast colleague herb stately...huh, i actually got through an entire sentence. it is a miracle."

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"*cough cough* I GOT A SORE DADDEH! *Cough cough cough*"

Turner:

"oh dear, however will the fans cope?"

Stately:

"*cough cough* JUST DO YA GADDANG ASMR SCHTICK DADDEH, I'LL BE FINE! *cough*

As our commentary duo bicker back and forth the music for our National Champion:

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Ian (DeColt?)!

Plays and out he comes, all smiles as he holds up the CFW CWF National Title to cheers on his way to the ring. Stepping in he produces a mic and begins to address the crowd.

Ian?:

"Man, I gotta tell you guys it feels good to have this belt. No, not good, it feels right that I have this. Maybe that's part of being a DeColt, having a belt. I mean I heard George DeColt-my dad?- had this belt so that's cool...wait, if that guy's my dad why don't I just call him and ask-?"

Voice:

"YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUU!!!!"

Ian's psychological breakthrough is sadly cutoff by the arrival of someone nobody wants to see.

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Ted Brady

Brady storms out from the back with hatred in his eyes and malice in his heart, he rants into a microphone.

Brady:

"YOU DIRTY NO GOOD DECOLT I SHOULDA KNOWN BETTER THAN TO EVEN LET YOU SNIFF THAT GOLD LET ALONE WIN IT!"

Ian?:

"Oh good, you again, look I'm really done playing your weird 'Back In My Day' game, ok? Can you just go apply a headlock or something, I was onto a breakthrough here."

Brady:

"BREAKTHROUGH!? BREAKTHROUGH!? OH DON'T YOU WORRY, I GOT SOMEONE TO BREAK THROUGH YOU!"

WHAM!

As is sadly the custom nowadays, Ian is attacked from behind by an unknown assailant in a hoodie and jeans. The hulking brute throws his hood back to reveal:

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OH **** IT'S LARRY WOOD!

Brady lets out a hearty laugh as it's clear who's challenging for the National title now. Wood roars out abuse to the crowd as he poses with the championship over the downed maybe-DeColt until Brady shepherds him to the back, once again confident that he can destroy the golden thorn in his side...

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Mammoth vs Ant-Man

Our opening contest saw the superheroic Ant-Man take on the superheavyweight Mammoth. The match is a shocking rout for Ant-Man who nimbly dodges the clubbing offense of Mammoth until the big man manages to punch himself out so-to-speak and left him wide open for an impressive scoopslam from the surprisingly strong Ant-Man and a follow up with the Antidote (Lionsault) for the pin and the win.

In an extremely short match, Ant-Man defeated Mammoth in 3:54 by pinfall with an Antidote. - D-

As soon as the first competitors leave ringside (one slower and more...blubberously than the other) we're suddenly beholden to a far more unwelcome sight.

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"Dangerous" Deborah Young!

The most dangerous competitor in all of CFW steps out from the back, conspicuously without her manager Bossman McGhee. With a glare, she motions to her side and from her shadow steps...

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This Guy!

A well-dressed young black man with a swagger in his stride and a smirk on his face. He produces a microphone and addresses the crowd.

Man:

"Helloooooo BC, how ya doin' tonight? Actually nah, don't answer that, I just realized I couldn't give two half pounds of monkey crap how some toothless yokels in this open sewer of a province's thinkin'!"

The crowd, naturally, boos this scathing insult to their home.

Man:

"Boo all ya like, y'know I'm right. Now here's the rub boys'n girls, McGhee's out, and yours truly, Ezekiel Zachariah Streetz, EZ to my lessers which I can assure all of you are! But I'm guidin' the most Dangerous lady in all of wrestling to heights such a tiny little runt like McGhee couldn't hope to bring her to! Tonight we're gonna have my girl here close accounts with that pipsqueak flippy flopper Electric Dreamer when Debby puts her on dream street once and for all and that's a fact!"

EZ Streetz throws the mic down and gestures to Deborah, who flexes to even more boos as the duo make their way into the ring to await Dreamer's entrance.

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Electric Dreamer vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

Dreamer burst out of the locker room like a house of fire and immediately went after Deborah with a barrage of high-octane aerial maneuvers halted only when EZ Streetz on the outside tripped her up as she bounced off the ropes. From there, Deborah took the time to slam, bomb, and suplex Dreamer around the ring in a show of true domination that defied the crowd's attempts to rally the plucky young luchadora. However, overconfidence on Young's part proved an almost fatal mistake as an attempted use of an alley-oop into the corner saw Dreamer land on the top rope and nail Young with a moonsault for a nearfall directly after. Dreamer quickly went to build up a head of steam and had the big woman reeling with her high-velocity lucha stylings but everyone soon found themselves distracted by streets hollering and shouting to the back!

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Oh christ, another one!?

Another large musclewoman stormed out from the back, getting on the ring apron and distracting Head Official Dace LaVoie while-

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Do jacked ladies just grow on trees!?

Yet another Amazon storms the ring and clobbers Dreamer with a clothesline, putting the boots to her before picking her up and tossing her into the waiting arms of Deborah Young who slams Dreamer down with a thunderous Sit-Out Powerbomb! Both of the interlopers back off, leaving a confused Dace no choice but to count the dirty pinfall for a tainted win for Young (not that she minds).

In a decent match, Deborah Young defeated Electric Dreamer in 6:02 by pinfall with a Sit-Out Powerbomb following interference from Glorious Gloria. During the match we also had Juliette King run in and attack Dreamer. - D-

Post-match the two mystery women run back into the ring and begin assaulting Dreamer along with Young as Streetz struts and preens around the ring, regaining his microphone in time for the trio to SMASH Dreamer into the mat with a triple-powerbomb!

Streetz:

"My oh my my my, y'all see that? My girls are somethin' else huh? Now lemme lay this out for all the slow-folk of BC. These two fine femme fatales here are named Juliette King and Glorious Gloria and along with my main squeeze Deborah here, they are the Order of Diana and my personal Amazon hit squad ya hear? CFW, ya'll on notice, cuz soon as ya'll get more than one bit of gold, we gonna have it allllll~! C'mon ladies, let's let the janitors spatula that stain offa the mat, hahaaaa~"

Streetz walks his way to the back with his newfound stable of amazons stepping behind him. Dreamer for the second time in as many months has to be helped to the back.

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Ariel Breaks vs K-Squared

K-Squared had fallen quite a ways from his previous heights as a title contender but he'd be damned if he was going to lose to a Cher impersonator, though Ariel certainly gave him a run for his money. Aerial (not Ariel) maneuvers dazzled the audience as both competitors tried to outwrestle the other with springboards and moonsaults and topes (oh my!) that caused them both to crash to the mat again and again. Ultimately K-Squared shows his true and quite dirty colors by raking Breaks' face and downing her with a brainbuster and following it up with the a Special K for the pin!

In a decent match, K-Squared defeated Ariel Breaks in 12:08 by pinfall with a Special K. - D-

After the match K-Squared went to grab a mic and address the crowd...until deciding against it and simply throwing the microphone down and giving Breaks a spiteful stomp and storming to the back, Ariel stumbling after him shortly after.

A few moments later our fun times are interrupted by everyone's favorite mischief monster:

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Grapple Goblin!

Here he comes, the tubby terror, running around the ring, pillaging the merch stand, spilling fans' popcorn, the fiend! He rolls into the ring and flails his bag of ill-gotten swag around like a madman, cackling horrifically until.

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"HOWDY KIDS!"

Turner:

"SWEET JESUS WHAT IS THAT HORRIBLE THING!?"

Stately:

"*cough* Hey you actually had passion, daddeh-*cough cough*"

Carrying one of the most diabolically ugly puppets known to man, the young fellow introduced as Garry The Entertainer parades around the ring having the terrifying simian slap hands with everyone at ringside before rolling into the ring to face off with the Goblin who goes for a staredown...with the monkey. The monkey responds in kind. The narrator questions his sanity. The referee dings the bell!

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Garry The Entertainer vs The Grapple Goblin

Wait why's it say Garry's in this match? Grapple Goblin spent most of it trying to wrestle that stupid puppet while Garry hung out in a corner making small talk with the fans. Referee Dace LaVoie kept trying to explain to Goblin his actual opponent was the puppeteer not the puppet but Goblin would hear none of it and it left Dace no choice but to join Garry in the corner and commentate on the match with him. Eventually Goblin grows tired of 'Chain Wrestling' with the monkey and tries to shoot it into the ropes...this goes about as well as you could expect as it just flops onto the mat. Goblin looks around, hands on hips, shaking his head disapprovingly before Garry steps in and tries to placate Goblin by explaining the monkey's tired and offering to take the irish whip in his place. Goblin nods enthusiastically before shooting Garry into the ropes and set up a back body drop only to have have Garry flip over into a sunset flip attempt! Goblin flails his arms, trying to keep his balance until Garry's yanking pulls Goblin's tights down to reveal a pair of purple polka dot boxers and take out Goblin's balance to complete the move and get him the pin!

In a bout that had sub-par wrestling and non-existent crowd heat, Garry The Entertainer defeated The Grapple Goblin in 7:34 by pinfall with a Pants Pull Sunset Flip. - E

Post-'match', Garry goes to claim his monkey and wave its hand to the crowd as his other grabs a mic.

Garry:

"Howdy kids, my name's Garry, and this is my best buddy Charles!"

Garry flaps the mouth of his puppet pulling off a bit of ventriloquism.

Charles:

"You can call me Charlie! Gee, Garry, it sure is cold up in Canada!"

Garry:

"That's right, Charlie, as a matter of fact Canada is home to-"

Voice:

"WHAT THE HELL YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?"

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Playtime's over...

Storming out from the back come Ted Brady and Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance who look less than happy with the new arrival.

Brady:

"Does this look like Sesame Street to you, kid!? No, this is a wrestling ring, MY wrestling ring! There ain't no room in it for some scrub off the street and his creepy ass puppet now get outta here!"

Garry and Charlie look at each other.

Charlie:

"Whaddya think, Garry?"

Garry:

"I dunno, Charlie, I think we better do what he says!"

Charlie:

"Y'know some people say people and chimps like me have a common ancestor and y'know...lookin' at him I see the resemblance."

Brady:

"GEEEEET OOOOUUUUUTTTTT!"

Garry and Charlie bail as Brady charges into the ring with Chuck following after him. Garry and his chimpy chum share a shrug to the audience as they make tracks to the back. The camera following them to the back where we see a strange scene...

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Tennessee William (Lookin' good)

William:

"Come on, little mama, speak to me!"

William is patting the hand of-

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Ariel Breaks

-who is lying on a bench in the back looking worse for wear after her battle with K-Squared while nearby-

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Jeremiah Martin

-walks back and forth, hands on hips.

Martin:

"Come on, Tennessee, we have a match to win, you can't spend all night looking over that-"

William looks up at Martin, face disapproving, Martin puts up his hands.

Martin:

"Wonderfully nice young lady."

William:

"Look Jerry-"

Martin:

"Jeremiah."

William:

"I know you're my fan and my partner but sometimes you gotta care about people more than just matches, ya get me?"

Martin:

"Yeah, yeah I get you..."

Ariel reaches up to pat William's shoulder.

Ariel:

"I'll be fine, Rocker, go get 'em..."

William nods and stands up, nodding at Jeremiah and walking to the curtain. Jeremiah looks after him and then down at Ariel with a scowl before charging off after his idol.

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Tennessee William & Jeremiah Martin vs Ted Brady and Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

A match of two mentors and their wayward proteges went about as well as you could expect for the more seasoned members of each tandem as Martin was obsessed with gaining the attention and affection of William while Ted Brady was obsessed with making Dorrance didn't even think about heading up to his most hated of ropes: The top one. Needless to say actual in-ring action took a backseat to the dramas coming to a head in both tandems until a Dorrance, in open rebellion against Brady, did a suicide dive to William on the floor, leaving Brady to shout abuse at his student from inside the ring. Jeremiah quickly tries to capitalize with a schoolboy rollup but soon found himself sat upon and Brady holding onto the ropes for a dirty victory for the 'traditional' duo. Brady wasted no time in getting his hand raised while shouting vulgarities at Dorrance, who stood up and stormed out, their team apparently strained if not broken entirely.

In a decent match, Ted Brady and Chucky Dorrance defeated Tennessee William and Jeremiah Martin in 14:40 when Ted Brady defeated Jeremiah Martin by pinfall while using the ropes for leverage. - E+

With both teams leaving ringside it was time for our main event...

CFW CWF NATIONAL TITLE MATCH

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Ian (DeColt?) VS Larry Wood

Larry Wood made his entrance like a rabid sasquatch, storming around ringside, threatening fans with chairs, bashing various objects against the ringposts and generally acting like Grapple Goblin's older scarier brother. His menace was only impeded when Ian ran out from the back (tossing his belt to Dace LaVoie in the process) and tackled him into a brawl in the crowd! The two men traded fists but the far bigger Wood quickly took the advantage, pounding Ian all around the ringside area before executing a piledriver on the outside that had the fans shrieking in terror and despair! Wood, sensing a swift victory, tossed Ian inside and made the cover but found he could only get a nearfall off the champion even as he tried multiple times! This seemed to make Wood all the angrier as he hauled Ian up and bashed on his back with clubbing blows before shooting him into the ropes, but his spinebuster attempt was thwarted by Ian sliding between his legs and ramming a knee into the small of his back, sending the big man stumbling into the ropes and into a DeColt .45 (Superkick) on his way back!

Ian pounced on the bigman for a pin but was thrown off bodily at two, almost hitting Dace with the landing. Ian wouldn't be denied however, smacking Wood with another .45 as he stood up and quickly trying the DeColt Stampede (Running Powerslam), but Wood proved to heavy and Ian was rewarded for his attempts to slam the big man with a headbutt that sent him to the mat! Wood proceeded to beat and batter Ian, clubbing and slamming and splashing the champion but all of his pin attempts were for naught as Ian would NOT stay down. Sensing the need to end thing, Wood hauled the champion up and shot him into the ropes going for his patented Big Foot (Yakuza Kick)-

But Ian dodged and sweeped Larry's leg out from under him, causing the big man to crash to the mat! Ian quickly went for the move that won him the title, crossing Larry's legs and locking in the End of Days (Sharpshooter)! Larry howled and shouted, beating on the mat and trying to power his way to the ropes but the champ would not be denied, dragging the giant sasquatch to the center of the ring again and again until finally the big man slammed his meaty palm onto the mat in agony, tapping out and giving Ian the win and his first title defense!

In a bout that had great heat and decent wrestling, Ian? defeated Larry Wood in 11:47 by submission with an End of Days. Ian? makes defence number 1 of his CWF National Championship title. - D-

Post match, groggy and battered, Ian lifted his National title and grabbed a mic.

Ian?:

"Ted Brady, you scumbag, I know I'm never gonna get the answers I want about who I am while you're dogging me! So send all the Enforcers you want to try and take this belt away from me, it's never gonna happen and I won't stop until I take you down once and for all!"

Ian then threw the mic down and basked in the adoration of the fans as the show went off the air.</div>

DarK_RaideR · November 6, 2018

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Pteroid · November 6, 2018

POP!

The (discount) champagne bottle spurted its bubbly contents out as a cheer went up in the locker room. Glasses clinked and laughs were had as the party picked up its stride in celebration of our latest and greatest show.

I, meanwhile, was in the office with Ted, making some very important calls...

"Ok the deal with Buchinsky's in," Ted grunted, "We present ourselves as a package deal to the Confederation. You get Winner to play ball?"

I nodded, "Once I noted that three Canadian companies in the alliance would give all of us a bit more say politically he jumped at the chance."

"Just like we thought," Brady nodded, "With all three of us in cahoots it'll keep us from getting into any wars like those hosers down in California."

"And you got a line on the new roster members?" I asked.

"Yep, the SOTBPW-Christ that's a mouthful-castoff and the kid are getting contracts as we speak."

I exhaled and nodded, leaning back in my chair, "Ted...are we actually pulling this off?"

"Pulling what off?" Ted asked.

"When you had me join you on this you made it sound like it'd be a bit of fun to burn through some extra cash before you hung your boots up, but now we're brokering a Canadian bloc of the COTT," I looked over at him, "Are we actually gonna make a go of this?"

Don't sound so enthusiastic, Wiz," Ted grumbled, "But yeah, I think we are gonna make a go of this."

"I'll see about getting us another veteran to take on Ian," I pulled out my phone again.

"Start with Vessey, he's the one running the old folks home," Ted stood up and made for the door, "I meanwhile am not leaving until I get me some of that champagne I bought. ALRIGHT YA UNGRATEFUL BRATS, BOSS MAN COMIN' THROUGH!"

I rolled my eyes as another cheer went up from the locker room, going to dial the numbers I'd gotten from the COTT rolodex...

Pteroid · November 6, 2018

CFW Presents: A COTT Wrestling Show

CFW CWF NATIONAL TITLE MATCH

Ian (DeColt?) vs An Old School Enforcer

Ant-Man vs K-Squared

Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI & Kid Fantastic (Debut!)

Garry The Entertainer vs Jeremiah Martin

Tennessee William vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

MAW's Heartbreak Express vs The Order of Diana

Leion · November 7, 2018

CFW CWF NATIONAL TITLE MATCH

Ian (DeColt?) vs An Old School Enforcer

Ant-Man vs K-Squared

Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI & Kid Fantastic (Debut!)

Garry The Entertainer vs Jeremiah Martin

Tennessee William] vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

MAW's Heartbreak Express vs The Order of Diana

DarK_RaideR · November 7, 2018

CFW CWF NATIONAL TITLE MATCH

Ian (DeColt?) vs An Old School Enforcer

Only a DeColt can beat a DeColt!

Ant-Man vs K-Squared

Ant-Man fan here, like what you've done with the superhero gimmick too

Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI & Kid Fantastic (Debut!)

Tension builds, but the eventual breakup doesn't happen here. Not while against these opponents.

Garry The Entertainer vs Jeremiah Martin

Grapple Goblin with the distraction as he shows up for the rematch against the puppet #CalledIt

Tennessee William vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

Martin's not around, William falls to Debbie and her manager

MAW's Heartbreak Express vs The Order of Diana

Support your Female Freakbeasts

Greylocke · November 14, 2018

I'd be disappointed if Monster Ishimura doesn't join the Order of Diana too. I'd been contemplating putting together a trio of monster females in my own game, except my planned stable was going to involve Deborah, King and Ishimura instead of Gloria.

Good to see Larry Wood. I was kind of disappointed that he's only limited to Canada in 2016 since he's always one of my favourites, and I almost always try to push him to the main event.

CFW CWF NATIONAL TITLE MATCH

Ian (DeColt?) vs An Old School Enforcer

Ant-Man vs K-Squared

Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI & Kid Fantastic (Debut!)

Garry The Entertainer vs Jeremiah Martin

Tennessee William vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

MAW's Heartbreak Express vs The Order of Diana

foolinc · November 14, 2018

CFW CWF NATIONAL TITLE MATCH

Ian (DeColt?) vs An Old School Enforcer

Ant-Man vs K-Squared

Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI & Kid Fantastic (Debut!)

Garry The Entertainer vs Jeremiah Martin

Tennessee William vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

MAW's Heartbreak Express vs The Order of Diana

Pteroid · November 14, 2018

*Ring Ring! Ring Ring!*

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"Ungh...hello?"

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"Boss!"

"Gah! D-dangit, Ian, not so loud it's late!"

"Boss you gotta listen to me, I've got a scoop for you guys!"

"Huh? Scoop? This isn't a news company, Ian..."

"I couldn't think of a better word, but look, guess who just got released from CGC?"

"Uhhh..."

"Times up!"

He told me.

"...hell, that's some news."

"I know, right? And he's sticking around BC until his buddy's let go too, you know what that means?"

"I certainly do, thanks for the heads up, son."

"No problem!"

*Click*

With a smirk on my face, I shook off my drowsiness and summoned up the booking plans, it was time to make some changes and some calls to go with them...

Pteroid · November 24, 2018

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CFW Presents:

A COTT Wrestling Show

Attendance: 300 (SELL OUT!)

The promotional help from ACPW, 4C, and the COTT in general seems to have certainly panned out well for the fledgling promotion, the George Kinneal Auditorium is packed with fans that are now being filmed with actual cameras by staff NOT related to Ted Brady.

Speaking of...

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"Where'd the hell did you all come from!?"

Ted Brady opens the show to a chorus of boos from the regulars soon picked up by the newcomers as the dumpy veteran enters the ring with a mic in his hand.

Brady:

"Yeah yeah yeah, back on your smartphones, ya damn millennials, 'bout the only thing smart about all of ya! Now let me introduce myself because ignorant yokels like you probably don't respect history enough to know who I am! My name is Ted Brady and if it weren't for me professional wrestling as you know it wouldn't even EXIST in Canada so YOU'RE WELCOME ya ingrates!"

Brady rides out a series of jeers and boos before continuing.

Brady:

"But you know who DOES respect me? Respects wrestling? The Confederation of the Territories of which CFW is now a member, that's right I'm moving us up in the world, I'm dining at the tables of men like Troy Winner and Sam Keith and I'll be as rich as every one of them! In fact, I'm raking in so much cash we can now afford to expand, so starting next week we're gonna start qualifying matchups for a tournament to crown our first ever CFW tag team champions!"

The crowd cheers the announcement.

Brady:

"That's right, cheer now ya ingrates! But don't get used to it because I'll tell ya this, I don't care how much my ungrateful protege Chuck Dorrance has strayed from proper old school wrestling, I will drag him to the promised land of the Tag Team belts and he will have a stranglehold on those belts that you whippersnappers will never brea-"

Ted's angry rant is suddenly cut off by the music of CFW CWF National Champion, Ian (DeColt?) who storms out from the back and joins the owner into the ring.

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Ian (DeColt?):

"Ted Brady, you come out here and run your mouth in front of the good people of British Columbia month in and month out but every month I send you and whatever goon squad you send after me packing! That's why you went crying to the COTT, so you could get a fresh crop of suckers to try and take this title away from me but it's YOU I'm after, Brady! Because I know once I send you packing once and for all, I can finally get some answers about whether or not I'm truly a DeColt!"

Brady:

"You disrespectful punk! Coming out here and acting all high and mighty with me, I'll get that belt in due time but until then it's funny you should mention my enforcer this month because he decided he wanted to come out and meet you face to face...here he is folks...CROCKETT MCNAMARA!"

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Crockett McNamara!

The former NOTBPW star Crockett McNamara (or is it Robbie Tubbs?) comes out from the back with a determind look on his face, arms crossed as he glares at Ian DeColt(?). The two men have a staredown from the ring and the entranceway as Ian holds the CFW CWF National Title aloft challengingly at the Irish technician until security comes out to make sure both men return to the locker room peacefully, Brady storming to the back behind them.

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The Heartbreak Express vs The Order of Diana

The two energetic young talents from Mid Atlantic Wrestling didn't seem to take their opponents seriously on account of their gender and this was a drastic mistake as they received an unmitigated pounding by the two Amazons under Streetz's direction. The unfortunate newcomers were sent packing back to Baltimore with a decisive check in their loss column.

In a bout that had terrible wrestling and non-existent crowd heat, Glorious Gloria and Juliette King defeated Ralph Liotta and Johnny Needham in 3:32 when Juliette King defeated Ralph Liotta by pinfall with a Vertical Suplex Drop. - E-

With the Heartbreak Express limping to the back, Streetz steps into the ring to pose and preen with the two victorious Amazons before producing a microphone.

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Streetz:

"Hoo boy, you see that? Did you. See. That? That was domination, that was obliteration, that was what my girls here are all about! Now Mr. Brady's a smart man, he's not one wasting people's time, I'm thinking we don't even NEED a tournament with this level of talent 'bout to make this whole division their b**** but hey if the little boys and girls back there wanna try and take what's ours by right then they can step up because nobody but nobody can stand against Glorious Gloria, Juliette King, and...oh I'm forgetting somebody...oh right-"

Streetz points at the entranceway and out comes.

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"Dangerous" Deborah Young!

Young makes her imposing presence felt as she steps into the ring with Streetz hyping her all the way, her manager and stable leaving the ring but not ringside as her opponent makes his way to the ring...

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Tennessee William vs "Dangerous" Deborah Young

Minus his usual backup of either Jeremiah Martin or Ariel Breaks, the rock'n roller soon found himself at a serious disadvantage with the Order of Diana and EZ Streetz on the outside. Both Turner and Stately noted it was odd that neither Martin nor Breaks were coming to William's aid, eventually coming to the conclusion that he'd told them not to for whatever reason. This was of course his undoing as clearly as after distraction after distraction to his many hope spots, Tennessee fell victim to the sit-out powerbomb to put him out of his misery.

In a poor match, Deborah Young defeated Tennessee William in 8:26 by pinfall with a Sit-Out Powerbomb after Streetz interfered. - E+

Turner:

"a poor showing for mr. william here-"

Stately:

"HOLD ON THEIR DADDEH, THE BIG LIL LADIES AIN'T DONE WITH HIM!"

Indeed, urged on by Streetz the trio of the Order beat down on Tennessee in the ring until suddenly...

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Electric Dreamer!

The Luchadora comes running out but halts at ringside, glaring at Streetz and his gang in the ring who dare her to come inside. However, she merely smirks and points behind them to a figure that has quickly scaled to the top rope...

AND CROSSBODIES ALL THREE OF THE ORDER WHEN THEY TURN!

The figure springs up and reveals himself as...

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California Kid!

The former SOTBPW luchador has come to British Columbia to help his fellow masked wrestler it seems and as Dreamer rolls into the ring to join him the duo successfully run off the Order who shout abuse as they're shepherded to the back by their manager. With the Amazons fought off, Dreamer and Kid bring William to his sense and bring him to the back.

With that drama finished it's time for some levity.

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"HIYA KIDS!"

F***.

Garry's back with Charlie the horrifying monkey puppet, he has it slap hands with the few fans brave enough not to shrink back from the terrible monster at ringside, climbing into the ring Garry regards the full house.

Garry:

"Golly Charles, it sure is packed here tonight!"

Charlie:

"Like a can of sardines, boss, speakin' of, have a breath mint. AH! AH! AH!"

Charlie bobs his head and makes chimp noises as Garry rolls his eyes playfully.

Garry:

"That's rich coming from the patron saint of banana breath, but enough about us, Charles, we're here to give an important lesson!"

Charlie:

"A lesson!? Bah, come on, it's almost time for summer break, these kids don't need a lesson!"

Garry:

"Ah but that's where you're wrong, Charles, there's always time to learn and tonight we've got something special! The food pyramid!"

As if from nowhere, Garry produces a diagram of the food pyramid, showing it to the audience.

Garry:

"Now I know it's easy to think you can live off of stuff like candy and ice cream and-"

Charlie:

"Bananas!"

Garry:

"Charles, that's a fruit!"

Charlie:

"Not if we split it! AH! AH! AH!"

Garry rolls his eyes and shrugs at the audience.

Garry:

"But seriously, kids-"

Voice:

"YOU STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!"

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Out comes Jeremiah Martin!

The fanboy of Tennessee William storms out from the back with a sour look on his face as he points menacingly at the two-gah, no, one!-one in the ring!

Jeremiah:

"I've had it up to here with wannabes like you coming into this company and trying to steal the thunder of REAL Entertainers like MY idol Tennessee William! Pretenders like you and that stupid-"

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"Two Four Six Eight! Who Do We Appreciate, Jerry! Jerry! Yay yay yay!"

Ariel Breaks prances out in a cheerleader outfit dancing around Jeremiah whose attitude immediately turns around into the fakest smile of all time.

Jeremiah:

"WONDERFUL WOMAN who William says I need to be nicer to! So here I am! Being nice! Look how nice I am being!"

In the ring, Charlie 'leans' close to Garry.

Charlie:

"Hey Garry?"

Garry:

"Yes?"

Charlie:

"How much meat are you supposed to have in that food pyramid?"

Garry:

"I'm glad you asked, Charles, most experts agree-"

Charlie:

"That this guy's got a serious Knuckle Sandwich Defficiency! Gettim!"

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Garry The Entertainer vs Jeremiah Martin

Jeremiah came into this match determined to win, Garry came in determined to entertain, Ariel came in determined to cheerlead, and Charles came in determined to endlessly flirt with Ariel. (If the cher tribute act doesn't work out in Breaks' case she can seriously do some good ventriloquism) Martin tore into Garry with a series of hard hitting blows and dirty moves now that his idol wasn't around to rein him in, but Garry's unorthodox stylings kept the match from being one-sided in the superfan's favor. The deciding factor however was Ariel at ringside as her attempts to get Jeremiah in the game just infuriated him more and more until his temper finally blew up and he peeled off to shout at her and ended up in an argument with Charlie, leaving him ripe for Garry to catch him with the sunset flip, incidentally pulling down Jeremiah's tights to show off his Tennessee William boxers (get them now from CFW.com!) before bringing him down for the pin and the win!

...OH she was a CHER-Leader, I get it now!

In a poor match, Garry The Entertainer defeated Jeremiah Martin in 7:19 by pinfall with a Pants Pull Sunset Flip. During the match, Jeremiah Martin was distracted by Ariel Breaks. - E+

Post-match Jeremiah storms off yelling at Ariel all the way to the back while Garry and Charlie celebrate in the ring, however their celebration is short-lived...

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"What'd we tell you, kid!?"

Ted Brady and Chuck Dorrance storm out and chase Garry off, glaring at the young wrestler as Charles makes rude gestures at them. The old-school duo prepare for their match, soon joined by their opponents...

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Ted Brady and Chuck Dorrance vs Kid Fantastic and JOJI

JOJI and the debuting Kid Fantastic quickly established them as the exact antithesis of everything Brady stood for and it drove him to no end of insanity as the match went on, angrily chiding and lecturing the two of them all the way through the match, trying to make them serve as a lesson to Dorrance who was getting more and more angry with his mentor as things escalated to Brady actively stopping the match when either side was growing too high-octane for his antiquated tastes. Everything went to a head when JOJI ducked a clothesline meant for him by Dorrance that sent him to the outside, quickly finding himself on the receiving end of a suicide dive by JOJI that distracted head official Dace Lavoie as Dorrance stumbled into a small package by Fantastic! However, with Lavoie's back turned we had a sudden appearance by an unlikely party:

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K-Squared!?

Behind Lavoie's back, K-Squared quickly switches the position of the small package so that Dorrance is pinning Fantastic! He quickly bails from the ring as Lavoie turns around to count the pin!

In a bout that had decent wrestling but didn't have much heat, Ted Brady and Chucky Dorrance defeated JOJI and Kid Fantastic in 8:12 when Chucky Dorrance defeated Kid Fantastic by pinfall following interference from K-Squared. - D-

Post match Fantastic tries to indignantly plead his case to Dace but the ref doesn't buy the story until JOJI ushers his partner to the back. Dace goes to lift the hands of Brady and Dorrance but K-Squared quickly enters the ring and raises Dorrance's hand himself, pointing at him and nodding enthusiastically as Brady storms over and pulls the two apart, screaming at Squared that he's 'Part of the problem!' before he and Dorrance head to the back.

Soon Ant-Man makes his own entrance and we're ready for our semi-main event!

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K-Squared vs Ant-Man

Both men were coming of rebounds in their career trajectories last month but only one was going to keep that in this match up. While Ant-Man's superb strength and athletic ability would be more than enough to carry him to a victory against a lesser competitor, K-Squared brought with him the experience, speed, and ring savvy that came with a career as long as his. Also he cheated. A lot. Like a big dirty Kuntz. This is best exemplified when Kenny managed to get his knees up for the Antidote (Lionsault) and flipped over into a pin with a handful of tights to secure his second dirty victory of the night before running out like a thief in the night to keep Ant-Man from getting revenge.

In a decent match, K-Squared defeated Ant-Man in 12:24 by pinfall with a handful of tights. - D

CFW CWF National Title Match

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Ian (Decolt?) © vs Crockett McNamara

The challenger from NYCW was quite a different trail as compared to the massive brute that was Larry Wood last month but he proved no less of an obstacle for our beloved champion as McNamara made up for the size disparity by taking things to the mat and mercilessly working Ian's leg like only a NOTBPW alumni could do. However, with the fans on his side, Ian wasn't about to take this treatment lying down even WITH a pained leg! With those trademark DeColt(?) fists he put McNamara on the ropes again and again but every time it seemed like he was going to put the stretcher away the leg would fail him!

DeColt .45? Countered into an ankle lock!

DeColt Stampede? Leg buckles at the critical moment for a nearfall!

DeColt Driver? Again the leg gives out and McNamara locks in his Subway STF!

McNamara seemed to have things done and dusted with his finishing hold locked in, but with the fans baying for his comeback, Ian managed to pry apart the Irishman's arms and transition it into the End of Days (Sharpshooter), wrapping McNamara's legs around his worked over one as a makeshift support that kept him standing long enough for McNamara to tap his submission to the cheers of the fans!

In a bout that had good heat and decent wrestling, Ian (DeColt?) defeated Crockett McNamara in 14:23 by submission with an End of Days. Intrepid Ian Identity makes defence number 2 of his CWF National Championship title. -D

Clearly fatigued from the hard fought match, Ian claims his championship and holds it up for the fans who roar in approval...before roaring in terror as a mysterious individual hits the ring!

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One Big Biker!

Former SWF and CGC wrestler and Sons of Anarchy fan club president Grease Hogg looms behind Ian, yanking the National title out of his hands and bashing him across the face with it! As Ian falls to the mat, Grease Hogg quickly hauls him back up by the hair and nails his Grease Spot (Piledriver) to lay the champion out fully and pose with the belt as the crowd boooos in disapproval to close out the show!</div>

Pteroid · November 24, 2018

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CFW Presents:

A Tag Team Wrestling Show

Main Event, The Debut Of A Monster:

Grease Hogg vs Ant-Man

Plus Tag Team Tournament Qualifier Match-Ups!

Featuring:

The Order of Diana (Glorious Gloria and Juliette King)

California Dreamin' (Electric Dreamer and California Kid)

4C's TJ Bailey and Clutch McKane

NYCW's Wild and Wicked (Brutus Milano and Andrew Harper)

Tennessee William and Ariel Breaks

Plus 3 Mystery Teams!

</div>

KnowYourEnemy · November 24, 2018

Fixed. <blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Pteroid" data-cite="Pteroid" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="45786" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div><div style="text-align:center;"><img alt="1m3Peu8.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/1m3Peu8.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> CFW Presents: A Tag Team Wrestling Show Main Event, The Debut Of A Monster: Grease Hogg vs Ant-Man Plus Tag Team Tournament Qualifier Match-Ups! Featuring: The Order of Diana (Glorious Gloria and Juliette King) California Dreamin' (Electric Dreamer and California Kid) 4C's TJ Bailey and Clutch McKane NYCW's Wild and Wicked (Brutus Milano and Andrew Harper) Tennessee William and Ariel Breaks Plus 3 Mystery Teams! </div></div></blockquote>

KnowYourEnemy · November 24, 2018

Prediction Card:

Grease Hogg vs. Ant-Man

DarK_RaideR · November 24, 2018

CHER-leader was typical Pteroid insanity, but I lost it at Grease Hogg being president of the Sons of Anarchy fan club. Also, I demand that Garry the Entertainer's finisher is rebranded as the Pants Pull MONKEY Flip or something equally simian.

P.S. Cool company logo

Pteroid · November 24, 2018

Fixed.

I'm gonna be real with you? ...thought it was a pot leaf.

CHER-leader was typical Pteroid insanity, but I lost it at Grease Hogg being president of the Sons of Anarchy fan club. Also, I demand that Garry the Entertainer's finisher is rebranded as the Pants Pull MONKEY Flip or something equally simian.

P.S. Cool company logo[/Quote]

Glad I continue to get some laughs.

I know how management feels about the new logo...

"AHA! I KNEW OFFERING TO PAY IN EXPOSURE WOULD WORK!"

Curtman · November 24, 2018

Dang, no Grapple Goblin on the show.

Great show as usual, though.

DarK_RaideR · November 25, 2018

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Curtman" data-cite="Curtman" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="45786" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Dang, no Grapple Goblin on the show. <img alt=":(" data-src="//content.invisioncic.com/g322608/emoticons/frown.png.e6b571745a30fe6a6f2e918994141a47.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /> Great show as usual, though.</div></blockquote> Grapple Goblin is making the best of the COTT deal to conquer the world as its legend spreads.

Greylocke · November 28, 2018

I know it makes more sense for him to have a puppet, but whenever I hire Garry the Entertainer in my games, I always pretended that he had a real pet monkey/chimp that he brings to ringside.

1PWfan · November 29, 2018

Looking forward to the next show, I'm really enjoying this.

Pteroid · November 30, 2018

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CFW Presents:

A Tag Team Wrestling Show

Attendance: 300 (Sell Out!)

Before our commentary team can open our show we're suddenly serenaded by some extremely aggressive Nu-Metal heralding the arrival of:

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Grease Hogg!

The big tough biker storms out from the back, glaring at the fans like a rabid animal ready to strike until he's joined by someone else...

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Oooh, Mysterious~

The hooded figure puts a hand on Hogg's shoulder, seemingly calming the angry American (as calm as 295lb gorilla with a Steppenwolf fandom can get at least) and leading him to the ring. Once inside he take a microphone and addresses the booing masses.

???:

"Blessings be upon all within this arena. It is a joy and an honor to grace you all with the presences of myself and Mr. Hogg, and I trust the feeling is mutual."

The boos are an extreme negative to that statement.

???:

"Hmm...an interesting reaction to one who has come to save you. Yes, save you all from the doldrums of your ignorant path, your wallowing in the fallow fields of lucha libre and Canadian wrestling both Northern and -eugh- Golden. I have come to take you all to the promise land...the Land...

The figure pulls back his hood!

<img alt="MC8S9BU.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/MC8S9BU.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

The Guru:

"Of The Supreme!"

The fans are shocked, former SWF manager and commissioner The Guru has arrived in the CFW! With his characteristic 'I Know Something You Don't' smirk, he paces the ring in his fine robes as Hogg glowers at the fans.

The Guru:

"Now Mr. Brady was dead set upon finishing off that duplicitous DeColt with one of his handpicked representatives but after seeing the destruction my pupil here could wreak (and a rather large cash donation) he saw fit to put the dismantling of that tarnished gold into my capable hands. So dear Ian, dear sweet little Ian, from whatever hospital bed you've found yourself in, look into the eyes of a man who knows what's best for you. Surrender your title to Mr. Hogg as a representative of the Path of Supremacy and turn yourself over to me...I can help you find out things about yourself you could never do chasing your tail in this rundown haven of has-beens and never-weres."

Before The Guru can continue your spiel, they're cut off by the heroic music of Ant-man! He goes marching out from the back with his own mic in hand!

<img alt="uGWncxp.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/uGWncxp.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Ant-Man:

"Hold it right there your Self-Righteous Scion of The Supreme!"

Grease Hogg roars and goes to attack him but is held back by an amused looking Guru.

Ant-Man:

"The unlawful dismantling of a law-abiding citizen like Mr. Maybe-DeColt cannot go unpunished, and while a Wild Boar like your minion may be tough to a mere man, a swarm of ants can strip such a beast to the bone in seconds! But I have no such backup as I do things on my own so I'll just have to take my time with it!"

A rather...nonsensical promo, but evocative nonetheless as the champion of justice strikes a pose to the fan's cheers. The Guru keeps smirking, giving a sarcastic clap before responding.

The Guru:

"Bold speech, Mr. Ant, I would expect nothing less from a self-proclaimed hero, but in the land of Supreme your sort are a dime a dozen, and I shall take great enjoyment in watching you be squashed beneath the power of pupil. Make yourself ready, Mr. Ant, get your affairs in order, be at peace with your insect gods for tonight you shall feel the might of Supremacy!"

With a wicked cackle the Guru relinquishes the mic, all three leaving amid the roar of the crowd as we prepare for our first match up.

Tag Team Title Tournament Qualifying Match

<img alt="BjlxuWE.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/BjlxuWE.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="tZ2P5lw.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/tZ2P5lw.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Htt8tAH.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Htt8tAH.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="yiYIjJm.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/yiYIjJm.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="nEtMrBG.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/nEtMrBG.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

California Dreamin' (Electric Dreamer & California Kid) vs Wild & Wicked (Andrew Harper & Brutus Milano)

The big, strong, and traditional duo of Harper and Milano out of NYCW came into this match with a rather unorthodox (read: Plodding) style that sought to ground the high-flying pairing of Kid and Dreamer. However the lucha adherents proved far too swift and clever for the guests from New York and the match came to a sudden end when California Kid countered out of a Full Nelson by Harper into his West-Coast Wrap Up (Shiranui) for the pin and the win.

In a bout that had sub-par wrestling and little heat, California Dreamin' defeated Wild and Wicked in 7:53 when California Kid defeated Andrew Harper by pinfall with a West Coast Wrap-Up. - E+

We quickly cut to backstage where we are informed what we're seeing has been 'Previously Recorded' earlier in the day. Head Official Dace Lavoie is standing by with a group of CFW wrestlers...

<img alt="cGJwuAW.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/cGJwuAW.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Now gentlemen, you've all entered the tag team tournament but I understand there's some...confusion about who is teaming with who here."

<img alt="nDFlSPC.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/nDFlSPC.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Ain't any confusion here! This scum sucking son of a gun's trying to steal my apprentice!"

<img alt="pcqMvXj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/pcqMvXj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"K-Squared is APPALLED at this insinuation. K-Squared merely wanted to give this upstanding young talent the opportunity to chose for himself who he wants to team with."

Both men look over at the apparent Belle of the Ball.

<img alt="Mb6uGrG.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Mb6uGrG.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Uhhh..."

Dace:

"Mr. Dorrance I'm afraid if you want to participate in this tournament you're going to need to make a deci-"

Brady:

"Ain't no decision needs to be made! He's my student, my lackey, MY PARTNER!"

Brady grabs at Dorrance to pull him to his side but Chuck backs off. K-Squared smirks, seeing an opportunity.

K-Squared:

"See, this is what K-Squared was talking about, Chucky, this guy? He just wants to control you, wants to cage your potential and sink you down to his level but K-Squared? K-Squared wants to see you fly, Chuckmeister, K-Squared wants to see you soar to the heights K-Squared knows you can reach."

K-Squared puts an arm over Chuck's shoulder and smirks at both him and Ted. Chuck grimaces but shrugs.

Dorrance:

"Know what? Screw it, I'm with him."

K-Squared:

"YES!"

Brady:

"What!?"

Before Brady can protest, Chuck and K-Squared turn away and run off leaving the curmudgeon as alone as he's always to deserved to be.

Brady:

"What the-Lavoie you jackass, what do I pay you for!?"

Dace:

"What was I supposed to do?"

Brady:

"MAKE him be my partner!"

Dace:

"I can't just snap my fingers and make something happens, I'm not a genie!"

Brady:

"A genie's just a wizard with a paycheck, and that's you!"

Voice:

"Excuse me."

Brady:

"Go away, I'm yelling at my employee!"

Other Voice:

"Hey ugly!"

Brady growls and whirls around to find...

<img alt="UI2y5np.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/UI2y5np.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Garry The Entertainer...and the Pot that just called the Kettle black

Brady:

"YOU!"

Garry:

"Well evening Mr. Brady-"

Charlie:

"Yeah me, Gorilla Face! Screw your weird not-son situation we're here for answers!"

Garry:

"Well yes, like my compatriot here said I've apparently been entered into the tag tournament but I'm not sure who my partner i-"

Brady:

"The monkey."

Garry:

"Beg pardon?"

Brady:

"Your partner's the monkey now screw off!"

Charlie:

"Hey listen buster, I know I could whoop your ugly tuckus back under the troll bridge it came from but I'm no wre-"

Brady:

"Your name's on the roster that means you'll do what I say to do now GET OUTTA HERE!"

Garry:

"Well...crud, come on, Charles, I'll try and figure something out."

Charlie:

"This ain't over ya tub'o blubba, we'll see who has the last laugh!"

Garry and his apparent 'tag partner' leave the room, leaving Ted with Dace.

Brady:

"Now then, who am I gonna partner with?"

Dace:

"Well there iiiiis one other signee who didn't produce a partner..."

Brady:

"Who?"

Brady looks at Dace as two sets of fingers suddenly sprout from behind him and gently tap him on the shoulder? Brady whirls around to find:

<img alt="S7E95jc.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhrrrraaaapple Goblin!"

Brady:

"...crap."

Brady and Goblin look at the camera in a show of comedic timing that would make a sitcom jealous, we smash cut to ringside for our next contest.

Tag Tournament Qualifying Match

<img alt="UI2y5np.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/UI2y5np.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Htt8tAH.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Htt8tAH.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="YJvc7lQ.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/YJvc7lQ.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="H3qY76s.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/H3qY76s.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Garry & Charles vs The Order of Diana

Now Garry's little buddy Charlie is a terrifying sight on most days but even the most hideous puppet this side of Jeff Dunham's cavalcade of crass caricatures isn't as shriek-inducing as the thought of going up against The Order. The match primarily saw the two musclewomen battering down Garry with their rough and tumble offense before a 'hot-tag' to Charlie saw the puppet (helped along by a not-so-subtly dressed stagehand) run wild Gloria and Juliette until being 'tripped' by Streetz on the outside, leading to what the commentators identified as 'Amazon Annihilation' (a Doomsday Device) for the pin and the win on the poor chimp.

In a terrible match, Order of Diana I defeated Garry The Entertainer in a Handicap match in 1:54 when Glorious Gloria defeated Charles the Chimp by pinfall with an Amazon Annihilation. - E

We once again cut backstage to find some more tournament related drama going on...

<img alt="vcWayDj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/vcWayDj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT TEAMING WITH ME!?"

Jeremiah Martin looks absolutely incensed at the news that he won't be teaming with

<img alt="3nL1J3e.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/3nL1J3e.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

This Handsome Devil

Tennessee William stands next to Ariel Breaks with his arms crossed.

William:

"Well lemme tell ya something a-uh-huh, what was my only instruction for you last month?"

Jeremiah:

"..."

William:

"Don't be cruuuueeeelll~"

<img alt="R6JGDMb.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/R6JGDMb.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"To a heart that's truuuuue~"

Martin points a finger in Ariel's face.

Jeremiah:

"YOU DON'T GET TO RIP OFF A TRUE ARTIST LIKE THAT YOU SECOND RATE-!"

William swats Martin's hand away and glares sternly.

William:

"This is what I'm talkin' about, Jerry-"

Jeremiah:

"Jeremiah!"

William:

"-ever since I found this little mama you've been actin' like I dumped ya, and while I got no wrath to the rainbow I don't swing my hips that way, dig me?"

Jeremiah's eye twitches.

William:

"So unless you start gettin' more supportive I'm gonna return you to sender back in the ghetto, ya got me?"

Jeremiah opens his mouth then clenches it shut.

Jeremiah:

"Sure...whatever you say, anything for you, Tennessee..."

William:

"Now you stay right on back here and don't cause no trouble during our match, c'mon little mama."

Ariel:

"Let's do this, Tennessee!"

William and Ariel walk out of frame as the camera lingers on Jeremiah.

Jeremiah:

"...anything. For. You..."

Tag Tournament Qualifying Match

<img alt="3nL1J3e.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/3nL1J3e.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="R6JGDMb.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/R6JGDMb.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Htt8tAH.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Htt8tAH.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="nDFlSPC.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/nDFlSPC.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="S7E95jc.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/S7E95jc.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Tennessee William & Ariel Breaks vs Ted Brady & Grapple Goblin

One side is a little bit country, a little bit rock'n roll the other is a little bit surly and a little bit toll-bridge troll and it made for one weird ass match. If it wasn't William breaking out his guitar to serenade the fans, it was Ariel breaking off a dive to duet 'I Got You Babe' with her tag partner, and it wasn't that it was Grapple Goblin breaking out a karaoke machine to scream a bars of 'We Built This City on Rock'N Roll' until his own partner tossed it out of the ring in the only action that would ever get him cheered. Speaking of Brady certainly spent most of the match playing spoiler to the antics of his fellow wrestlers, demanding they take the match seriously and respect the traditions of pro wrestling like eye rakes, foot stomps, and hair pulling.

Eventually, however, this came back to haunt the veteran as in an effort to show his technical prowess he locked in a headlock on Ariel Breaks and loudly declared he wouldn't release it until she tapped out to his 'Legitimate Submission Hold'...problem is neither of them were the legal man and Tennessee William hit Grapple Goblin with the Devil's Crossroad (Swinging Neckbreaker) and got the win for his team. Brady was left in shock as Ariel did her best to celebrate inside the lock until William ran the former Matty Phatty off with his guitar leaving the two to celebrate in the ring...

In a poor match, Tennessee William and Ariel Breaks defeated Ted Brady and The Grapple Goblin in 7:35 when Tennessee William defeated The Grapple Goblin by pinfall with a Devil's Crossroad. - E+

As soon as Goblin and Brady are gone from the ring, a new figure comes onto the scene.

<img alt="vcWayDj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/vcWayDj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Jeremiah Martin steps out, applauding the two with a seemingly sincere look on his face, he enters the and holds his arms open wide to embrace the victorious team. The two of them share a look then quickly go for a group hug with the super fan. The fans cheer this reunion while the camera moves around to get a shot of Jeremiah's face in the hug.

And his cold...lifeless...eyes...

Yeah this'll end well.

The three of them exit the ring and we're ready for our final qualifier of the night!

Tag Tournament Qualifying Match

<img alt="coZjnBd.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/coZjnBd.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="CLXBDw1.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/CLXBDw1.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Htt8tAH.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Htt8tAH.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="pcqMvXj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/pcqMvXj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Mb6uGrG.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Mb6uGrG.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

McKane & Bailey vs K-Squared & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

High-flying action was the name of the game from the two teams of familiar jerks and friendly guests as the newly formed alliance of K-Squared and Chuck Dorrance matched up with 4C's McKane and Bailey. A high-octane match by any metric but for a newly formed duo, K-Squared and Dorrance seemed to be on the same cheating wavelength as they managed to steal the match with Dorrance nailing Bailey with a low blow on the outside to keep him from coming to McKane's rescue after K-Squared nailed the Special K for the win.

In a decent match, K-Squared and Chucky Dorrance defeated Bailey & McKane in 15:22 when K-Squared defeated Clutch McKane by pinfall with a Special K. - D-

As K-Squared and Dorrance high-tail it with their place in the tag tournament secured, we cut to what appears to be a video filmed from the hospital room of one...

<img alt="FtVnOVj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/FtVnOVj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Ian (DeColt?)!

The CFW CWF National Champion has his belt draped across his waist as he sits up in his hospital bed, glaring at the camera.

Ian:

"So Ted Brady's buddies in the COTT's old guard couldn't get it done so he's decided to get some pre-retirement home thugs to come at me. Grease Hogg there's something about you that irks me, something familiar, like I've been made to face down bullies like you and little worms like the scumbag that's behind you. Hogg you're real tough when you go after a guy from behind but next month you won't have that luxury because I'm going to give you, The Guru, and Ted Brady what you all want: A Title Match. Because if I have to face down every single big tough bruiser in this country, on this continent, on this entire world-ESPECIALLY AUSTRALIA-"

Ian blinks at that outbrust, looking around in confusion before continuing.

"-to discover who I really am and hold this title with all the prestige it deserves, then god willing I will take you all on!"

Ian defiantly holds up his title belt as the video fades and we go to our main event!

<img alt="uGWncxp.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/uGWncxp.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Htt8tAH.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Htt8tAH.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Aw9q2B3.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Aw9q2B3.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Ant-Man vs Grease Hogg

It was a bout of heroic super strength vs sheer brutal force as Ant-Man sought to halt the momentum of Grease Hogg in the big man's very first match in the company. However, a Harley isn't so easily stonewalled (except by like a literal stone wall) especially by an ant, and it showed as the big man quickly gained the upperhand after an opening flurry by Ant-Man, punishing him with hard-hitting power moves and clobbering blows that would make a lesser ant be squashed. Ant-Man, mustering all the resilience in his body, tried to make a final stand by countering a jumping axehandle into a spinebuster that appeared to leave Hogg open for the Antidote (Lionsault) but with a clack of the Guru's staff onto the ring apron, the Biker roared to life like a Kawasak-er...Harley again and caught Ant-Man with his Grease Spot (Running Powerslam) to put an exclamation point on his first match in CFW! The Guru enters the ring and our final image of this event is the glowering biker and his smirking teacher.

In a decent match, Grease Hogg defeated Ant-Man in 11:58 by pinfall with a Grease Spot. - D+

</div>

DarK_RaideR · November 30, 2018

I don't know if it's the booking, characters or writing, but just when I think things couldn't get any weirder amd funnier, Pteroid just hits the ball out of the park again and again.

Pteroid · December 2, 2018

CFW Presents:

A Summer Wrestling Show

CFW CWF National Title Match

A 5-On-5 Tournament 'Preview' Matchup

California Dreamin', Tennessee William, Ariel Breaks, & Jeremiah Martin

vs

The Order of Diana, "Dangerous" Deborah Young, K-Squared, & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance w/ Streetz

Ted Brady vs Ant-Man

MORE TOURNAMENT QUALIFIER MATCHES!

Featuring:

4C's Gilbert Bros.

ACPW's Nest of Vipers

The Rhode Island Renegades (Raphael & Lion Heart)

And A Mystery Team!

Sign In

The Wonderful Wizard of Ottawa - Cverse

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