The Wonderful Wizard of Ottawa - Cverse

DanMTheMan · September 1, 2018

Ian (DeColt?) vs K-Squared

Ted Brady & 'The Old School Enforcer' -whoever that is- vs Tennessee Williams & Ant-Man

Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs Electric Dreamer

Grapple Goblin vs Cheriel-Uh I Mean- Ariel Breaks

"Dangerous" Deobrah Young vs JOJI

Jaded · September 1, 2018

Ian

Tennessee/Ant-Man

Chuck

Goblin

Young

LlamaSquad · September 2, 2018

Ian (DeColt?) vs K-Squared

Ted Brady & 'The Old School Enforcer' -whoever that is- vs Tennessee Williams & Ant-Man

Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs Electric Dreamer

Grapple Goblin vs Cheriel-Uh I Mean- Ariel Breaks

GOBLIN MUST WIN!

"Dangerous" Deborah Young vs JOJI

Pteroid · September 3, 2018

"WHADDYA MEAN HE DOESN'T LIVE IN BC!?"

"I mean what I told you, Ted, when you said you wanted Crusher for tonight's show I told you it'd have to be an official contract, you muttered 'just give him a one night' like you didn't hear me and wandered off. I reminded you about it a few days later but you were drunk and throwing darts at the Matty Phatty costume and muttered one night deal again! Now it's game time and we are sans a Crusher because you wouldn't listen!"

Ted grumbled to himself and pulled out a cellphone, "Crap...welp we'll just need another enforcer then..."

"Nobody that big is gonna work with us on that short notice, Gargantuan is with the DeColts-and frankly the less people working for them that know about the Ian gimmick the better-and all the others aren't gonna be able to get here in time..." I looked through my booking notes and shook my head, already trying to think of a replacement or an angle to run to explain the absence...probably Ted being too much of a grouch to actually get a part-

"Yeah, Wayne, it's Ted," Ted growled into his ancient Nokia, "Ted Brady...yeah, the ****ing Monkey Guy, wiseass listen. We're running the Kinneal and we're short a big bastard, you in? Yeah yeah, I'm good for it, still got all that Him Torton's money. Yes there's catering you lardass, now get down here! Fine, goodbye."

I blinked at Ted, "...did you just book-"

"Yes I did, the less said about that geriatric tub of blubber the better..." Ted shook his head, "Whatever your runtime for the tag match was? Half it, then half the half...then half the half of the half and make sure he stays on the apron for most of it."

"And what do I fill that time with exactly?" I asked as he began making his way to chew out some of his nephews that were trying to jury rig one of the turnbuckles with some nylon rope and a carabiner.

"Figure it out, Wiz, that's what I pay ya for, make that magic!" Ted quickly became too busy lightly abusing the offending offspring of some brother-in-law to pay attention to me.

I briefly considered whipping up an age reduction potion but decided against it...

Mammoths were as extinct twenty years ago as they were now.

Pteroid · September 9, 2018

The Canadian Federation of Wrestling Presents:

Another Wrestling Show

Location: The George Kinneal Gymnasium, British Columbia

Attendance: 81 (-1 Change, Was Dog Sitting That Day)

Rating: D

Music! Check. Nepotism-Centric Workforce! Check. Announce teams at extremes of the loudness scale?

"OH YOU KNOW THAT'S A CHECK DADDEH!"

"who are you talking to-"

Herb Stately:

"HEY HEY HEY AND ANOTHAH HEYYYY CEE-EFF-DUBYA FANS, IT'S HANDSOME HERB STATELY HERE WITH JEROME "THE ANNOUNCER OF DOOM" TURNER FOR ANOTHAH NIGHT OF ACTION BROUGHT TO YA BY TED "DON'T CALL HIM PHATTY" BRADY!"

Turner:

"announcer of wha-?"

Stately:

"SHUT'CHA MONOTONE MOTORMOUTH, TURNER, HERE COMES THE K-MAN!"

"Ok everyone sit down, shut up, and BASK in K-Squared's greatness!"

Accompanied by his knockoff hiphop theme, K-Squared struts to the ring and basks in the ire of the audience before producing a mic.

K-Squared:

"Thank you thank you, now that's what K-Squared calls a Hero's Welcome! You're all too kind to shower K-Squared in your praise for putting an end to that ridiculous feud between the pretender DeColt and that old fogey Brady but please, just wait for when K-Squared ends both their careers, starting with the mock-DeColt's!"

K-Squared's egotistical rant gets cut off when Ian Maybe-DeColt's music hits!

"That's quite enough, you Third-Person Piece of Garbage!"

Storming out from the back with mic in hand, Ian confronts the egotistical Kuntz from outside the ring.

Ian?:

"There's a lot of things I don't know: Who I actually am, why I can do all these moves, how I'm actually employed in this company when the owner wants to get rid of me-BUT there is one thing I do know and it's that you deserve the biggest ass-whipping I could possibly dish out and tonight you're gonna smashed into the ground so hard you're gonna wake up in Australia-A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH!"

Ian stops and blinks, seemingly surprised at the last bit, he shakes his head and continues.

Ian?:

"By the time tonight is over, Kuntz, the entire CFW audience-except Steve who is dogsitting today-is gonna celebrate me putting your arrogant ass in its place!"

K-Squared glares.

K-Squared:

"K-Squared's getting sick of your high and mighty attitude, so how about we skip the main event and K-Squared just kicks your ass right now!?"

K-Squared backs off, waving Ian to try and join him in the ring, but as the DeColt moves to slide in, K-Squared retreats out and into the crowd. K-Squared laughs and shouts something about 'Fighting on K-Squared's time' as he takes a side door out of the arena. Ian glares at his future opponent before giving the fans a quick pose and heading to the back to make way for our opening contest.

"Dangerous" Deborah Young vs JOJI

In opening intergender action we saw the high-flying prowess of JOJI tangle with the powerhouse stylings of Deborah Young, who tanked her way through JOJI's opening offense to catch him with a powerslam that cleared the way for Young to pound him with all forms of slam and suplex (most stalling ones) before polishing the Japanese sensation off with her Sit-Out Powerbomb!

In an extremely short match, Deborah Young defeated JOJI in 4:09 by pinfall with a Sit-Out Powerbomb. - E

As Young and Big Boss McGhee celebrate another effortless victory, we cut backstage to find a couple of jerks:

Pictured: Two Jerks

Ted Brady laces up his boots and glares over at his protege, Chuck Dorrance as the two prepare for their respective matches. Dorrance is on his smart phone, looking troubled...

Brady:

"Kid, get yer eyes offa that damn thing and focus, yew got a girl playin' superhero to beat down and I got...well a GUY playin' superhero and an Elvis Impersonator to pound into the dirt!"

Chuck:

"I...I just don't get this...he's here but he's there!"

Brady:

"HEY! FOCUS!"

Chuck looks up.

Chuck:

"But boss-!"

Chuck shakes his head.

Chuck:

"N-nevermind, ok yeah, focusing."

Brady:

"I ain't gonna be there to hold your hand, so ya gotta just rely on what I toldja and slam that wimpy luchadork into the ground!"

Chuck:

"You won't be watching?"

Brady:

"I ain't your daddy, kid, I got my own business to get to, just get out there and do like I taught and you'll be fine! Now if you'll excuse me I gotta make sure my secret weapon's here..."

Brady storms out, leaving Chuck watch him as he goes...

Chuck:

"Yeah...do what you said...right...totally..."

Hearing his music starting up, Chuck quickly puts his phone down and gets going to the ring!

Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs Electric Dreamer

With his mentor nowhere in sight it's like Chuck's a new man, going toe-to-toe with the masked Luchadora with an array of exciting cruiserweight maneuvers that are a far cry from the rest holds and clubbing blows Brady beat into him. High-octane is the name of the game and Dreamer makes a much better showing here than last month, keeping up with Dorrance's newfound vigor but one misstep on her part leads to her falling victim to Chucky's Revenge (Hammerlock DDT) for the pinfall!

In a decent match, Chucky Dorrance defeated Electric Dreamer in 8:18 by pinfall with a Chucky's Revenge. - D-

After both competitors head to the back, a rather poppy music track brings out a newcomer to CFW:

Ariel Breaks!

Clad in a sparkly outfit, the young Ontarian struts out and begins a spirited rendition of 'Life After Love' by Cher, getting the crowd into the performance...except for one...

Nevermind that manic grin, he is miserable.

Hands over his ears, Tennessee William's biggest fan is NOT enjoying Breaks' vocals until she finishes up in the ring and poses for a smattering off applause (and one rather vocal boo from the Fan).

Ariel Breaks vs Grapple Goblin

Sliding out from beneath the ring with his bag o'swag, Grapple Goblin rummaged around inside it to retrieve his own mic and started singing Come On Eileen for some reason before getting distracted by Ariel's shiny outfit and chasing her around the ring for the majority of the match until his inferior cardio caused him to fall victim to a fast roll up by Breaks. ...well that happened.

In an extremely short match, Ariel Breaks defeated The Grapple Goblin in 4:47 by pinfall with a fast rollup. E-

Post match Ariel poses for the fans some more before making her way to the back but is stopped by the music of Tennessee William-

"Ah-Uh-Huh~"

-who comes strutting out with his guitar on his back and a smile across his face, giving Breaks a nod and a grin as he walks past, receiving a wink and a skip in return.

The Fan sees this and his eye twitches a bit, someone's not happy that his idol may be making a connection...

Joining William for the upcoming tag match is Ant-Man, flush with confidence after his victory last week, he poses next to William who goes to pull out his guitar for a concert of his own until-

"OHHHHH NO YOU DON'T, YA ROCKABILLY RIPOFF!"

Ted Brady storms his way out, mic in hand.

Brady:

"I'm sick of the both of ya givin' pro wrestling a bad name, so I'm 'bout to put ya both in your place, ya hear me! And I ain't gonna do it alone, cuz I got me an enforcer now, and he's gonna put a hurt on ya like ya never felt before...yer gonna wish extinction was permanent because here...COMES...MAMMOTH!"

Nobody comes out.

Brady:

"I SAID HERE COMES MAMMOTH!"

Nobody.

Brady:

"GET OUT HERE NOW, YOU LARDY SON OF A-"

"URRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP!"

Turner:

"...oh dear."

Mammoth: He Ate All the Pies

Stepping-no, lumbering-no, oozing out from the back comes the largest most blubberous bum to ever cram himself into an xxxxL T-shirt and jeans so big a family of rats could probably use it as a home. Chicken drumstick in one hand and an extra large soda in the other he sluggishly trods to the ring and stashes his food next to the ring steps that he damned near crushes in his attempt at getting on the ring apron. Showing absolutely no signs of moving from there he glares at Ant-Man and William with malice...or boredom...or hunger...probably hunger.

He's fat, the joke is he's fat.

Ted Brady & Mammoth vs Ant-Man & Tennessee William

The match opens well for the face duo as Ant and William's youth and vigor are more than a match for Brady's curmudgeonly insistence on old-school tactics. Together they wrestle circles, squares, and hexagons around the veteran until the moment both faces, the audience, our announce team, and the wrestling world at large happens. Brady tags in Mammoth and the gigantic man runs a ruddy roughshod over the other tandem, dominating them with body slams, clotheslines, and literally anything that involved him not doing much more than running into them. For all the sixty seconds this lasts until Mammoth tires himself out again, tags in Brady and wanders to the back. Brady quickly dropped an elbow on Ant-Man and ended the destruction in his team's favor (Tennessee William's unconscious body having been carried to the back by an anxious look Biggest Fan).

In an extremely short match, Mammoth and Ted Brady defeated Ant-Man and Tennessee William in 5:27 when Ted Brady defeated Ant-Man by pinfall. D-

Brady and Mammoth (who had retrieved his food in the interim) skulk to the back in time for our grudge match main event:

Ian (DeColt?) vs K-Squared

The animosity here was palpable from the word go, K-Squared bouncing around like a pinball of hatred bashing against the brick was that was the young maybe-DeColt, who responded with power moves that his smaller opponent allowed for. K-Squared, however, didn't just have aerial moves in his arsenal, unleashing a fair few dirty tricks as well to turn the tide of battle in his favor, even sneakily countering the DeColt .45 into a low blow unseen by head official Dace Lavoie! Still, Ian makes the case for himself being a DeColt by kicking out even after this heinous maneuver, fighting back out of it and looking to hit Steve DeColt's famous DeColt Stampede (running powerslam) until it's reversed by K-Squared into a victory roll for the wi-no wait, Ian manages to reverse it himself and HE claims the win!

In a bout that had good heat and decent wrestling, Ian? defeated K-Squared in 15:30 by pinfall with a roll up. D

Post-Match K-Squared is up and furious that he's been outwitted by the possible DeColt, but is sent scurrying when Ian brings his fists up, ready to scrap some more. However, on the outside, he finds himself SMASHED in the back by a steel chair! Its wielder?

"HOW'D YA LIKE THAT WHIPPERSNAPPER!?"

Ian makes for the newly appeared Ted Brady but soon finds himself smashed from behind by the most unlikely stealthly assassin of all time!

You'd think he could have heard the tuba that plays whenever he walks...

A Chokeslam later and the embattled DeColt is down and out as Brady slips into the ring and takes out a mic.

Brady:

"You two little good-fer-nothin's think you got what it takes to be a champion!? Well we'll see next month cuz you'n me'n Mammoth here're gonna have a match an' the winners're gonna face each other fer the title in the main event! But that in yer vapes and smoke it!"

Standing tall at the end, Brady poses as Mammoth just sort of waddles off as we have title implications for next month's show. Stay tuned!

Pteroid · September 9, 2018

"So..."

"So?"

I folded my arms and grimaced at Ted, "Two things, one we're actually bringing Mammoth back for another match?"

"Hey, he's gotta put SOMEBODY over," Ted groused, "Like hell am I letting his fat ass run off with a payday so easy."

"Right," I grimaced, "Two, since when do we have a title?"

"Since yesterday," Ted yawned, "Bought one."

"From who?" I was getting frustrated, "If I'm supposed to book this ridiculous stipulation you just adlibbed at the end there, I'd like to know what we're putting on the line here."

Ted grinned, the kind of catlike smirk that would cross the face of a cat who'd cornered an especially plump sparrow, "Think it was 'ole Georgie DeColt who had it last, might've bought it with his retirement money..."

Pulling out a large briefcase, Ted put it on the desk in my office and opened it.

"H-holy hell..." I muttered, gazing at it...

"Ain't she a beaut?" Ted laughed, "And she's all ours, so book that main event carefully, we need the future of this company holding this sucker."

Ted stood up and began to walk out before looking over his shoulder, "By the way, Buchinsky agreed to our proposal, but Winner's still on the fence, may need to grow up into range for the Confederation to come calling first. They're sending Quibble up here for a little inter-promotional fight, so put him in where ya can, alright?"

I nodded dumbly, still staring at the relic of Canadian wrestling history that Ted had just thrown in my lap...it was time to make history...

DarK_RaideR · September 9, 2018

Never thought the Grapple Goblin could be outshined, but Ian-maybe-DeColt and Herb Stately (daddeh!) do just that.

Voeltzwagon · September 9, 2018

Mammoth and Land Mass for tag champs. If it was good enough for CGC it is good enough for you!

Pteroid · September 9, 2018

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CFW Presents: An Important Wrestling Show

Main Event Singles Match

For The CWF/CFW National Championship

Ian (DeColt?) vs K-Squared OR Ted Brady vs Mammoth

CFW VS ACPW!

Grapple Goblin vs Grimm Quibble

Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI

Deborah Young vs Ariel Breaks

The In-Ring Debut of Tennessee William's #1 Fan!

Ant-Man vs Jeremiah Martin w/Tennessee William

The Tag Match To Decide The Main Event!

K-Squared & Ian (DeColt?) vs Ted Brady & Mammoth</div>

Jaded · September 9, 2018

Ian

Goblin

Chuck

Deborah

Ant-Man

Ian/K-Squared

Greylocke · September 10, 2018

I'm still a little miffed that the SAW diary featuring Bruce the Giant and Oz cast never got off the ground. Hoping this one will last a while, at least...

Main Event Singles Match

For The CWF/CFW National Championship

Ian (DeColt?) vs K-Squared OR Ted Brady vs Mammoth

CFW VS ACPW!

Grapple Goblin vs Grimm Quibble

Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI

Deborah Young vs Ariel Breaks

The In-Ring Debut of Tennessee William's #1 Fan!

Ant-Man vs Jeremiah Martin w/Tennessee William

The Tag Match To Decide The Main Event!

K-Squared & Ian (DeColt?) vs Ted Brady & Mammoth

foolinc · September 10, 2018

CFW Presents: An Important Wrestling Show

Main Event Singles Match

For The CWF/CFW National Championship

Ian (DeColt?) vs K-Squared OR Ted Brady vs Mammoth

CFW VS ACPW!

Grapple Goblin vs Grimm Quibble

Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI

Deborah Young vs Ariel Breaks

The In-Ring Debut of Tennessee William's #1 Fan!

Ant-Man vs Jeremiah Martin w/Tennessee William

The Tag Match To Decide The Main Event!

K-Squared & Ian (DeColt?) vs Ted Brady & Mammoth

Pteroid · September 20, 2018

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CFW Presents:

An Important Wrestilng Show

Location: The George Kinneal , British Columbia

Attendance: 83 (+1)

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"WE AIN'T GOT TIME TA HEAR 'BOUT THE SETUP, DADDEH, WE GOT A MAIN EVENT TA DECIDE!"

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"herb, what are you talking abou-"

Stately:

"WHAT'D I JUST SAY! MATCH TIME DADDEH!"

Turner:

"but-"

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Ian (DeColt?) & K-Squared vs Ted Brady & Mammoth

Winning Team Faces Each Other For The CWF National Championship

The kickoff to this Important Wrestling Show primarily saw Ian facing Ted Brady as their partners exhibited different reasons for not tagging in. K-Squared made a game of feigning wanting a tag before quickly dropping off the apron whenever Ian made the attempt, while Mammoth...well Mammoth was busy polishing off a deep fried twinkie or seven. Still Brady and Ian were game competitors themselves and bitter old man's dirty tricks clashed well with his foe's emulation of the DeColt style. However, eventually Brady took a powder and brought Mammoth into the ring who unleashed a series of slow but quite effective body slams against DeColt before corner splashing Ian into his own team's corner. K-Squared took this opportunity to talk trash to the possible-DeColt until-SMACK! Ian slapped the taste out of the cocky high-flier's mouth which Head Official Dace Lavoie ruled constituted a tag!

With K-Squared now the legal man and Ian recovering outside the ring it was the third-person phenom's turn to tangle with Mammoth, attempting to out-maneuver the big man with his fast-paced style which kept Mammoth off balance until an attempted crossbody ended up with K-Squared in the big man's arms and pancaked on the mat soon after! We are however saved from what was sure to be a USPW-worthy main event by Ian breaking up the pinfall, dragging the flattened K-Squared to their team's corner to tag himself back in as Mammoth, thoroughly gassed from a whole two minutes of action moves to bring Brady back into the bout! Brady and Ian trade right hands in the middle of the ring until Brady reversed an irish whip to send Ian into his team's corner, running in after to-SMASH an axehandle into Mammoth's face and send him falling to the mat after Ian ducked! Brady quickly tried to salvage the situation by raking Ian's eyes and climbing to the top rope for the dreaded leaping nothing but finds himself caught on Ian's shoulder and put down with a DeColt Stampede (Running Powerslam) for the pin and the win!

In a bout that had great heat and decent wrestling, K-Squared and Ian? defeated Mammoth and Ted Brady in 6:32 when Ian? defeated Ted Brady by pinfall with a DeColt Stampede. D-

Ian doesn't have a lot of time to celebrate before he's attacked from behind!

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"HOW ABOUT A SPOILER FOR THE MAIN EVENT!?"

K-Squared bashes an unrelenting assault on Ian, stomping his face into the mat again and against before rolling his future opponent in the main event onto the apron and SLAMMING him face first with a DDT. As Dace Lavoie checks on the possible DeColt, K-Squared traipsed to the back, all smiles as he tapped his head and talked about 'Strategy' to the camera. Ian gets help to the back as we prepare for our second match of the night with our main event in question.

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Ant-Man vs Jeremiah Martin

Finally we get a name to the face of Tennessee William's #1 Fan, highly excited for his debut match-or rather excited to impress his idol as Martin came out with William by the hand claiming that he'd been trained 'By the KING of Rock'N Roll himself!'. If that was true it was a poor reflection of William's abilities as Martin was repeatedly styled on by the superheroic Ant-man again and again even as he tried to gain the favor of his favorite singer/wrestler. It was in the midst of Martin being held in a Boston Crab that William received a call on his cellphone and began talking with someone on the other end as Martin incredulously begged for him to watch the reversal that was surely coming. However, it was when William revealed that the person on the other end of the phone was none other than Ariel Breaks that a change came over Martin, whose face contorted into a rage and body contorted around to bite the leg of Ant-Man! As the heroic insect nursed his appendage, Martin quickly fell on him, bashing at his opponent with quick enraged blows that he landed again and again...and again...and again!? He won't stop attacking Ant-Man with those questionably legal blows until Dace Lavoie was forced to call for the bell, Martin having well overstepped the bounds of a wrestling match!

In a decent match, Ant-Man defeated Jeremiah Martin in 10:09 when Jeremiah Martin got disqualified after going into an attacking rage. D-

The bell does little to stop the anger of Jeremiah Martin, who kept assaulting Ant-Man until he was forcibly pulled off by William, still screaming about 'SELLOUT HUSSIES' as the country singer had to yank his number one fan clear out of the building!

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Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance vs JOJI

A fast-paced contest to cleanse the palate after the dour ending of the previous bout, JOJI and Dorrance squared off at lightning speed with both youngsters bringing the full brunt of their offense to the table with a myriad high-flying maneuvers with Dorrance taking the lead until...

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Somebody's in trouble~

Ted Brady, still feeling the affects of his match against Ian and K-Squared earlier, stormed out from the back to jaw at Chuck from ringside, keeping his protege's eye off the ball long enough for JOJI to force him to take a tumble and subsequently fall victim to the JOJI Miracle Explosion (450 Splash) for the upset victory for the Japanese sensation!

In a decent match, JOJI defeated Chucky Dorrance in 5:33 by pinfall with a Joji Miracle Explosion after a distraction from Ted Brady. E+

JOJI gets little time to celebrate his ring, bailing from the ring as Brady storms it. However, it wasn't his protege's opponent that he was after but poor Chuck himself! Picking his student up and literally dragging him out by the ear, Brady's only halted when Dorrance breaks free in front the curtain separating the arena from the locker room and the two get into a heated argument about how Dorrance was single handedly ruining wrestling (somehow) until...

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" 'scuse me, got a match to wrestle."

Grimm Quibble comes through the curtain. The Veteran Mainstay of ACPW tries to skirt past the quarreling pair but can't seem to get around them so eventually gives the audience a knowing look and a shrug before barreling through them, getting them to stop their argument to start after him until head referee Dace Lavoie intervenes and gets them to leave. We're ready for our next contest!

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Grimm Quibble vs Grapple Goblin

Par for course with Gobby's matches, the gibbbering weirdo tried to play mind games with the visitor from ACPW by insisting the makeup-less Quibble was his old gimmick of Quibble the Clown, constantly attempting to catch him with a white and red facepaint combo to get him to reprise his roll and just as constantly getting foiled. However, eventually he managed to succeed and...it was as though a transformation came over Quibble, going from easy-going veteran to laugh-out-loud comedian in a second. This however was bad news Gobby as a series of pantomime spots eventually saw Quibble The Clown get blasted in the face with water, clearing off the face paint long enough for him to immediately hit the Quick Quibble Crash (Diamond Cutter) for the victory!

In a decent match, Grimm Quibble defeated The Grapple Goblin in 7:47 by pinfall with a Quick Quibble Crash. E+

Turner:

"a surprising win our gues-"

Stately:

"I HATE CLOWNS, DADDEH!"

Turner:

"besting the grapple gob-"

Stately:

"CREEPY FACEPAINT LOSAHS!"

Turner:

"and now for our next con-"

CRASH!

Turner:

"sigh."

Stately:

"WONDAH WHAT THAT WAS DADDEH!"

<img alt="R6JGDMb.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/R6JGDMb.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Ariel Breaks comes stumbling out from the back, Daddeh

Stately:

"OOOH WHAT CAUSED IT, DADDEH!?"

<img alt="cTcK5m6.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/cTcK5m6.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

Deborah Young Did, Daddeh

Stately:

"OOOOH THAT EXPLAINS THAT, DADDEH!"

Turner:

"what is even going on right now-"

As Dace Lavoie attempts to get some semblance of order going, Deborah Young destroys poor Ariel Breaks, roaring about how she'll "DESTROY YOU (Breaks) LIKE I DESTROYED MCGHEE!" So apparently she gave her manager a similar treatment before she decided she wanted to kill a Cher Lookalike. Throwing the smaller woman into the ring, Young wastes no time in destroying her with her sit-out powerbomb as Lavoie shakes his head, refusing to start the match as Breaks is clearly in no condition to wrestle now. In her anger, Young hoists Breaks up, presumably for another powerbomb until-

<img alt="BjlxuWE.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/BjlxuWE.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

La Caballería!

Electric Dreamer has seen enough, clearly, and comes running out from the back, waylaying Dangerous Deborah with a flurry of high-flying lucha maneuvers that have the big woman rocking until a stray crossbody is caught and reversed into a back breaker! With the luchadora's momentum halted harder than a car hitting a brick wall, Young followed up with another Sit-Out Powerbomb and stormed to the back, happy at the destruction left in her wake. It takes some time for Lavoie and several staffers to help Breaks and Dreamer to the back but by the time this dark travesty is over we're ready for our main event...OR ARE WE!?

<img alt="pcqMvXj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/pcqMvXj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Hate to be the bearer of bad news..."

With a mile-wide smirk on his face a mic held loosely in his hand, K-Squared struts out from the back and addresses the crowd.

K-Squared:

"K-Squared is sorry to announce that after the heeeeinous attempt by the so-called Ian DeColt to try and take K-Squared out after K-Squared SINGLE HANDEDLY won his ungrateful ass the right to struggle for relevance against K-Squared's superior skill and the ass whipping K-Squared gave him, he's simply incapable of competing!"

K-Squared (which is rapidly becoming the most annoying word in the English language) struts up into the ring where Head Official LaVoie is holding the old CWF National Championship, he argues with Dace until he's cut off by Ian DeColt's distinctly DeColt-like theme music! With a look of determination even as he holds his bandaged head, Ian steps into the ring and snatches the mic away from the egotistical high-flier and gives a simple reply.

<img alt="FtVnOVj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/FtVnOVj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Ring the bell."

<img alt="JoViZnO.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/JoViZnO.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

<img alt="FtVnOVj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/FtVnOVj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="Htt8tAH.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/Htt8tAH.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" /><img alt="pcqMvXj.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/pcqMvXj.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

CWF TITLE MATCH

Ian (DeColt?) VS K-Squared

The match everybody had been waiting for did not disappoint as K-Squared and Ian put on a bout worthy of their feud and worthy of the CWF National Title here at this CFW show (nobody notices the Acronym weirdness, right?)! K-Squared focused on Ian's head, battering it with move after move while Ian's rallies to fight back eventually lead up to one of his many DeColt finishers that K-Squared only barely managed to escape or counter. DeColt .45? Dodged. DeColt Driver? Slipped out of! DeColt Stampede?? Countered into a DDT for a nearfall! It seems like everything is over as K-Squared goes to the top rope for the Special K (Shooting Star Press) but Ian miraculously moves at the last moment and...grabs K-Squared's legs after he crashes to the mat! As the crowd goes wild, Ian locks in the End of Days (Sharpshooter), capitalizing on the damage to K-Squared's body from the missed Press! K-Squared thrashes and writhes on the mat, trying to crawl to the ropes only to be draaaagged back to the center of the ring! To a rousing chant of 'Tap! Tap! Tap!' by the audience, K-Squared finally slaps the mat and we have our FIRST CFW CWF National Champion as Dace Lavoie awards the belt to Ian Maybe-A-DeColt! Our final shot of the night is of Ian holding the belt up for the audience as we cut abruptly to black (damn camera phones)!

In a bout that had great heat and decent wrestling, Ian? defeated K-Squared in 11:48 by submission with an End of Days. Intrepid Ian Identity wins the CWF National Championship title. D</div>

DarK_RaideR · September 21, 2018

Another splendid show with masterful comedy writing, Pteroid! Loved your character work and various shenanigans, though I gotta say Jerry Martin losing it due to Ariel Breaks jealousy was my top moment.

P.S. You might wanna drop by the Re-render project thread, a couple of awesome Tenessee Williams images dropped as of late...

Pteroid · September 24, 2018

<img alt="nDFlSPC.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/nDFlSPC.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Helluva show, Wiz, that was a thing of beauty."

<img alt="cGJwuAW.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/cGJwuAW.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"It was beautiful but it was flawed."

Ted looked up from his greasy post-show hamburger with an arched eyebrow, "Flawed? How? Sure we ain't makin' money off this but it was never about makin' money in the first place."

I shook my head, "No Ted, we need longer shows."

"Our shows are plenty long," Ted groused, "Ya wantin' us to be like SWF?"

"No," I sighed, "But that last show deserved a longer main event, hell we had to cut Deb and Ariel's match completely."

"Well what welse were we gonna do after you canned Brains?" Ted crossed his arms, "We gotta replace him by the way, Deb ain't ready to be on the stick by herself."

"Yeah yeah," I sighed, "Thirty more minutes, that's all I ask for, you want us to end up in the COTT, right? Well we ain't gonna do that looking how we are right now."

"Fine fine," Ted raised his hands, "But you better have the goods to deliver longer shows, I ain't wastin' more money."

Getting up from the table at the 24-Hour Diner, Ted belched and made for the door, I meanwhile clasped my fingers and leaned forward, preparing for the expansion...

<div style="text-align:center;">-------------

<img alt="uwZzW0H.png" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/uwZzW0H.png" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

CFW Presents: A 90 Minute Wrestling Show

Main Event Singles Match

CWF National Championship On The Line

Jeremiah Martin & Tennessee William vs Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

K-Squared vs Ariel Breaks

The Grapple Goblin vs A Newcomer!

Deborah Young vs Electric Dreamer

Ant-Man vs Mammoth

</div>

Voeltzwagon · September 25, 2018

Slowly expaaaaaanding. Oooooooh BABY

Greylocke · September 25, 2018

Main Event Singles Match

CWF National Championship On The Line

Jeremiah Martin & Tennessee William vs Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

K-Squared vs Ariel Breaks

The Grapple Goblin vs A Newcomer!

Deborah Young vs Electric Dreamer

Ant-Man vs Mammoth

DarK_RaideR · September 25, 2018

Jeremiah Martin & Tennessee William vs Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

Unless Ariel Breaks calls again

K-Squared vs Ariel Breaks

The Grapple Goblin vs A Newcomer!

GRAPPLE GOBLIN!

Deborah Young vs Electric Dreamer

Ant-Man vs Mammoth

foolinc · September 25, 2018

Main Event Singles Match

CWF National Championship On The Line

Jeremiah Martin & Tennessee William vs Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

K-Squared vs Ariel Breaks

The Grapple Goblin vs A Newcomer!

Deborah Young vs Electric Dreamer

Ant-Man vs Mammoth

BigJay2003 · September 25, 2018

Main Event Singles Match

CWF National Championship On The Line

Jeremiah Martin & Tennessee William vs Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

K-Squared vs Ariel Breaks

The Grapple Goblin vs A Newcomer!

Deborah Young vs Electric Dreamer

Ant-Man vs Mammoth

Leion · September 27, 2018

Hi I just caught up with the show, this is my first time predicting, hope I don't suck.

Main Event Singles Match

CWF National Championship On The Line

Jeremiah Martin & Tennessee William vs Ted Brady & Chuck "The Buck" Dorrance

K-Squared vs Ariel Breaks

The Grapple Goblin vs A Newcomer!

Deborah Young vs Electric Dreamer

Ant-Man vs Mammoth

Pteroid · October 7, 2018

Hello all, just letting you know this isn't dead, just went through a tough spell at work but after participating in a draft I'm feeling reinvigorated and ready to write some more so expect new results soon.

Pteroid · October 11, 2018

<div style="text-align:center;">BREAKING NEWS FROM TEW.COM

<img alt="MdEoegJ.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/MdEoegJ.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

JOHN "NEMESIS" CAMPBELL DEAD, AGED 57

Breaking news from Los Angeles as IPW Booker and Hardcore Wrestling Legend John "Nemesis" Campbell was found deceased in his Apartment at 12:45 AM after neighbors heard him acting erratically earlier in the evening. Early reports are indicating that an overdose on some form of narcotic was the cause despite the extremely large scale reports all over the LA Area of local individuals attempting to claim the 'Bounty' placed on Mr. Campbell by longtime rival and ex-business partner Winston "Brother Grimm" Boe in his hit single 'Nemesis 187 that [Expletive], I want that [Expletive]'s head, I'll pay you literally five million stacks if you [Expletive] [Expletive] that [Expletive]!'

More news as this develops.</div>

<img alt="cGJwuAW.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/cGJwuAW.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"...that a song title or a paragraph?"

<img alt="nDFlSPC.jpg" data-src="https://i.imgur.com/nDFlSPC.jpg" src="<___base_url___>/applications/core/interface/js/spacer.png" />

"Bet it's less annoying to hear some jackass holler that at a bar than Freebird."

"DO HO HO HO HO!"

"...hell was that, Wiz?"

"Were we not doing a Statler and Waldorf thing there?"

"We ain't in the COTT yet, ya dumbass."

Pteroid · October 30, 2018

Apologies about all these delays, holiday season's been driving me up the wall, I'm going to get back on this as soon as I possibly can.

DarK_RaideR · October 31, 2018

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-username="Pteroid" data-cite="Pteroid" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="45786" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Apologies about all these delays, holiday season's been driving me up the wall, I'm going to get back on this as soon as I possibly can.</div></blockquote> Good to know. Your flair for comedy is always a joy to read. Hope all is well.

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